• Member Since 9th Sep, 2014
  • offline last seen 6 days ago

LightningSword


Me. Take it or leave it.

T

This story is a sequel to So Much Leg . . .


Hoofenmouth has tried to get better at talking to girls. And failed. He's tried to approach Sunset Shimmer. And failed. Now, today, he's gonna try again, prepared to go on with the rest of his day either way.

He's gonna fail.

All because of these three crazy beauties who somehow want his affections just to "reignite their lost powers.” Hoofenmouth doesn't know what it means, or why they're targeting him, but they are relentless enough to hold him hostage and seduce him to make it work, and now Hoof has to keep himself together while hoping someone finds him, trying all the while not to "ignite" too soon.

Will he fail?

Most likely.

Once again rated "Teen" for some naughty thoughts and actions, and heavy, heavy implications of premature ejaculation and masturbating.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 100 )

Nother sudden fetish? XD

6279611 I admit, I'm kinda twisted. :pinkiecrazy:

Thanks for favoriting!

6279634 No prob :P

Comment posted by Sdrawkcabsitxetsiht deleted Aug 4th, 2015

Really, Hoof? Really?

You get your ass saved by Sunset Shimmer, and you can't wait to reward yourself for the rescue? After she pretty much gave you the chance to go out with her?

That is, if I'm reading this right. :twilightoops:

6279699 Thanks for the fave. :twilightsmile:

I'd change the description a bit if I were you on two parts. First, you say he'll fail then ask the reader if he'll fail two paragraphs later. And second, the trigger warning is a bit... icky. Even if that's the case, it'll still turn a lot of readers away.

Best of luck to you. :pinkiesmile:

I swear I felt 'So Much Leg...' would soon get a sequel and YAY it did. Hope to enjoy this one.

Great story, my friend! :raritywink:

Instant like and fave for you. :twilightsmile:

6279721 I appreciate that, man. Thanks! :pinkiehappy:

6279715 Actually, the last one asks if he'll fail to keep from "igniting" too soon. As for the repetitivity, I guess it's just a theme. I did it with the last story, too.

Thanks for reading, though. :twilightsmile:

6279720 I see you enjoyed it. :pinkiehappy: Thanks for the fave!

I'm not sure the site stats are up-to-speed. From where I sat, I saw it say there there were two total views at the top, 11 currently reading it, fifteen votes cast, and 31 views at the bottom. It seems the number 2 has grown strong in recent days....

For the story, I like. I can relate all-too-well to being the shy fella and being used for ulterior motives...though not to this extreme. Nor do I recall being that big a schmuck when it came to girls' feelings. Thought it's funny seeing the events from an outsider's perspective, I do NOT miss being a teenager. At. All. Just the same, thanks for the laughs.

6279787 Yeah, it takes awhile for the view counts to refresh. All the same, I'm glad you enjoyed. Thanks for reading! :twilightsmile:

What a great, great story. I felt so bad for the MC, yet i hope he does find someone eventually. Who knows what the future holds.

Dam Hoof great job there. I'll be watching you though...

Well, I'd call this a qualified success for the Dazzlings, but generally a good day for Hoofenmouth.

One question - why is Bulk Biceps a coach? He was taking part in the Battle of the Bands, and that suggests he was a student rather than part of the faculty.

6280005 Heh . . . yeah. I might end this off with a "Friendship Games"-themed story. If the movie is good, that is.

6280035 I don't know. He just gave that "coach"-y vibe. You know, the kind who'll order five more laps when you're already dead tired.

Thank you both for the faves! :pinkiehappy:

29th Like! :eeyup: I thoroughly enjoyed this one, as I have your other Stories from the Steam Collection. :pinkiehappy:

Ooh, that last quarter calls for another sequel:pinkiecrazy: you know, if you're up for it eventually:fluttershysad:

6280186 Possibly. If "Friendship Games" is any good, I might just try it. :raritywink: And thanks for the faves!

6280192 Aawww, alrighty then, it would've been fun reading Hoof awkwardin' his way into an eventual relationship with Sunset.

Because sex is funny.

Ooooh, the shenanigans were real. Really good sequel!

6280340 Thanks, and thanks for the fave! :twilightsmile:

Awwww, this was so heartwarming! :twilightsmile:
Though jesus, the things he sees. I feel both envy and pity for poor Hoof.

Also...I JUST GOT "HOOFENMOUTH" JOKE, F*@%! :flutterrage::facehoof:

6280713 Wipe that smirk off your faces :trixieshiftleft:

Oh hohoho yes!
Dis gon be guud.

Sequel again please! Handa! This journey never ends! Go for it Hoof!

On the other side stood Coach Bulk Biceps

Two things to say:
1| Finally, someone has used him for something.
2| YEAHHHHHHHHHHHH!

“YEEEEEEEEAAAH!”

Deeeere ya go....

Sunset began to go red-faced herself, “. . . it's actually kind of cute, too . . .”

I have no idea as to if this is realistic or not.
So I make a call out to any girl out there, is that something that is realistic for a girl to think?

This is amazingly well written, but throughout the story and especially at the end, I can't help thinking that this deserves to expanded to involve clop.
It's like you're taking everyone right to the edge of the cliff, hanging them over at a 55 degree angle holding them back by their collars, and then just staying there.

Some seriously brilliant 'stuff' could come of this.

Otherwise, bravo and good job on another brilliant story. It was... exciting. :facehoof: I'm terrible

Awwww Hoof....that's creepy

She may be a smoking-hot girl, but she's a human being! No different from you! She won't hurt you, or lash out, or turn you to stone, or turn into some kind of raging she-demon!

Ohh the irony...
lh6.googleusercontent.com/proxy/9yG3YRKpi500YCc56k_8Eud_FF2tRDh7Rp4kZ2XdOLXkt4lV_INTzxzRaKe0tmK1UpKZz3C3zbTKlqvTsELSMV77I48e3U0zy-L1o6yo7B14Jc1MQPvSUCAg79w=w399-h369-nc
---

“I'll be doing the whipping around here,” came Aria's voice in Hoof's left ear,

*gulps* I need a glass of cold water... and a shower to boot O_O
---

Walking out of the bathroom, he caught a sight in the corner of his eye, and saw Sunset Shimmer walk up to the door of the bathroom, pulling a piece of paper from it that seemed to have been taped there. She walked toward him and held up the piece of paper; one quick glance, and Hoof saw that it was a loose-leaf sheet with the words “OUT OF ORDER” printed on it.
“I figured you could use the privacy,” she explained with a smile as she put the paper into his hand.

Perfect girlfriend material right there... she's definitely a keeper :eeyup:

Comment posted by Sdrawkcabsitxetsiht deleted Aug 4th, 2015

6281410 There's a fetish for everything...

EVERYTHING

6281420 I don't think I'm quite skilled enough yet to write full clop. Maybe someday, but not quite yet.

And thanks for the fave! :pinkiesmile:

6281946 yes, you don't like it, we get it. So you are you still here?

6282841 Thanks, and thanks for the fave! :twilightsmile:

6281946
We meet again.

Why can't you just stop commenting on fics you dislike? It hurts the author's feelings and discourages them, so you should stop and comment on the fics you do like.

6282927 As much as I appreciate you speaking for me (and the fave on this story and for "GOAL!" :rainbowkiss:), I would appreciate it if there were no conflict in the comments. He's been messing around on my stories for a while, and he's in the minority every time. Let him. He doesn't bother me anymore.

I totally feel this guy, the struggle is real. he wouldn't stand a snowball's chance in hell where I work. I barely make it through sometimes, then again i'm buzzed half the time
quickmeme.com/img/e7/e7d52bb367a86b313f944ccb3648cc6fa096ec893649cdc7b5683641667f9fbb.jpg

6282927 dude just let people comment. I mean if he doesn't like the story then he can tell people that.

WHOOHOO!!!!!

Thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you so much!!! And I'd tell you I love you but I don't want to make things weird!


...

...

...


Ah screw it, I LOVE YOU MAN!!!!




But seriously though, this was an awesome sequel to the already amazing So Much Leg… story, and I can't wait to see what happens to spasmodic chick magnet Hoofenmouth next if you ever decide to make a sequel and or series to this. And even if you don't, I'm still glad that it managed to get a sequel anyway and I'll respect your decision if you don't want anymore of the Hoofman.

Though one thing I am confused about during this story is the timeline. A few characters like The Dazzlings mentioned stuff about meeting Hoof 'the other day' (which I'm assuming means yesterday during the first story), but didn't Hoofenmouth say that for the past few days or so he'd been trying to talk with Sunset even though he only just met her yesterday (during the first story) ? That's assuming 'the other day' means yesterday and I'm not just being dumb.

That's the only problem I have with the story, and everything else is like the grammar, characterization and such is still greatly done.


Sorry that I couldn't read the story sooner when it first came out by the way.


Thanks for the sequel, love you again man, hope you're doing okay, and can't wait to read whatever other stories you have planned. Take Care Dude!



P.S. As for Hoofenmouth, I can't tell whether I'm aroused by the sight or sympathetic to his plight.


Heh. Alliteration.

6283873 Oh, wow. :raritystarry: Thank you so much, man. I can't even put into words how grateful I am. I'm so happy you loved it so much, and if I am inspired enough by "Friendship Games", I may just add a third and final chapter to Hoof's story.

To address your confusion: "the other day" in this context is supposed to be ambiguous. It is quite a bit further back than yesterday, but the exact time is open to interpretation.

But thank you again for reading and enjoying this so much. Comments like these keep me strong and make me more willing to keep going, even in doubt. I'm lucky to have such awesome followers! :pinkiehappy:

Login or register to comment