• Published 29th Jul 2015
  • 3,583 Views, 55 Comments

Dazzle Robs a Bank - Eyeswirl the Weirded



Sunset joins the Dazzlings for a heist. For completely justified reasons, of course.

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Chapter 1: Much Better Career Choice

I can hardly believe I'm doing this.

Sunset rarely ran into any of the Dazzlings in town, even when very deliberately waiting around the spots Aria and Sonata had showed her while under the guise of 'just hanging out.' Progress in terms of friendship-building of any kind was slow, the three of them overall being lukewarm at best, even with Sunset herself. Still, she badly wanted to see the three of them as happy as Twilight's friends, now her friends, had ultimately made her, and she wasn't sure they'd get there on their own.

That feels like exactly the kind of well-meaning condescention I didn't want anyone giving me, right after the Fall Formal, but with the way those three treat each other...?

So here she was, involved in a crazy scheme that was partly her own doing, meant to help win over the Dazzlings and build a bridge between them and her friends. Adagio apparently got along with Rarity when working with her at the boutique and Pinkie said she'd talked to Sonata about pinecones for an hour once (Sunset didn't ask), but other than that, nothing. It would have to start with Sunset alone and go from there. She'd do something they wanted, then they'd do something she wanted, a fair, simple deal.

That Sunset would, in theory, be getting paid at the end of the Dazzlings' task made her feel like she was cheating them somehow. Then again, her own request wasn't anything hard, so maybe it went both ways?

Jogging down the street in a grey, two-piece suit, white, formal blouse, and black loafers, Sunset turned a corner to see three more girls in suits not unlike her own, standing near the back of a van and facing away from her. Sonata was's suit was dark blue, Aria's was a darker blue, and Adagio was dressed in beige. It might have been the first time Sunset had seen two of them not wearing heels, she probably wouldn't have even recognized them if not for their usual outrageous hair.

"I'm here," she called out, "you guys ready?"

Aria scoffed. "We were just wondering if you'd show up, Shimmer."

When the trio turned to face her, Sunset jumped with a start at their faces. Given a second to look at them, she saw they were wearing masks.

Clown masks.

White, scary, pitch-black-holes-where-their-eyes-should-be clown masks.

"We were just going over preparations," came Adagio's voice through a mask bearing a sinister smirk of smug superiority, an American flag painted over most of the surface, "you know what we're here for?"

"Y-yea," Sunset uttered, not sure where to look, "you guys remember our deal?"

Crossing her arms, Aria's dissatisfaction with that part of the plan was clear even through her own mask. It was a flat-nosed thing with light purple circles over the eyes, a thick layer of the same hue all along creepily-grinning mouth, as if applied by a toddler trying on mommy's make-up. "Yea, yea, we'll do it. But first we're robbin' a bank."

"No worries, Sunny! Though you might have to remind me later." Sonata's mask was by far the most horrifying. There was no evil smile, but if anything, that could only have made it less frightening. The mask bore curves along where a person's lips should be in a way that suggested the whole mouth-line was being pulled inward, like the jaw was somehow caving in on itself. Combined with the eyelessness of the thing, something about the dark red coloring on the exaggerated nose and the entire underside of the face promised death.

"G-good," muttered Sunset, feeling more uncomfortable with their agreement by the minute. She gave the three of them a quick look, unable to resist any longer. "So, gotta ask, what's the point of the masks? Your hair, well-" she brushed hand through her own vibrant, unconcealed locks, "-mine too, I guess, is probably gonna be a hint who we really are anyway, right?"

Adagio might have been rolling her eyes. "By the time we're done here, it won't matter. Besides," she said with a haughty hair-flip, "it's the principle of the thing. Honestly, what kind of villian are you?"

Sunset's jaw dropped. "I'M REFORMED! AND SO ARE YOU THREE!!"

"What?" Aria crossed her arms. "I don't remember agreeing to that."

Sonata shrugged. "Nah, she's kinda right, we haven't done anything really bad since the Bee-Oh-Tee-Bee."

"Pfft, whatever," Aria replied flippantly, "I'm still a bad girl."

"Well, regardless," said Adagio as she reached into a duffel bag resting in the back of the van, "we brought an extra just in case you made it." She pulled another mask from the bag, but it didn't match the clown motif they were wearing.

It was a yellow unicorn mask. With a long, red mane.

Sunset took it, scowling a little at Adagio, who she knew was smirking under that fake clown face. "Very funny." Still, if it meant she could hide her face when looking at those horrible clown masks, she put it on.

"Next," ordered Adagio as though going down a checklist, "armor."

A few minutes later, Sunset finished strapping on her second heavy shin-guard and gave herself a quick look over. Adorned with the thickest shoulder, chest, arm, and leg guards she could find, she wasn't sure why helmets weren't included in the van's armor selection. Maybe the Dazzlings' villainous fashion sense overrode the common type?

As it to reinforce the notion, she turned to see the others were all wearing considerably less than her. Sonata had the same thick chest-guard, but only backed it up with bicep and upper-leg protection, Adagio wore a heavy ballistic vest, and Aria was only wearing a light vest that fit under her suit jacket.

"Are you guys nuts?! We're gonna be getting shot at in there, I can't believe you're wearing so little!"

Aria shrugged. "Mobility's important too."

"So long as we shoot first," Adagio said with a chuckle, "I think we'll be fine. And if not," she patted a first-aid kit she had hanging from her waist. "I'll look after you."

Sunset was already grateful they were all wearing masks. "Right, so... guns? We're gonna shoot people?"

Sonata's giggles coming from that mask in this context sent chills up her spine. "Ah, don't worry about it, Sunny! Think of it like a video game and it'll be easy! Pedestrians are fifteen points!"

"No," said Adagio while slapping her most cheerful psychopath on the back of the head, "we want them alive, do not shoot civilians." Before Sunset could announce any measure of pride in Adagio's apparent benevolence, her voice tinged with a familiar, dark edge. "I'll be rounding them up to take as hostages!"

So close, and yet so far.

"On that note," Adagio continued, picking up a pistol and fastening a brass knuckle on the opposite hand, "everyone grab weapons."

Sunset found herself clutching a shotgun with a sledgehammer on her back. Aria was holding a submachine gun, but Sunset had seen her slip a thin knife into her sleeve. Sonata was holding some kind of assault rifle with a long barrel (I'm never going to get over that mask now!), but didn't seem to have anything for backup if she ran low on ammo.

Aria noticed too. "Not gonna bring like, a fire axe or a butcher knife, or...?"

"Nah," Sonata answered with a shrug, "I'll be fine."

Aria turned to give Adagio an unseen look, which was somehow responded to with a nod.

"One last thing," said Adagio as she drew a piece of paper from a jacket pocket, "we were given aliases for this little operation. Aria, yours is 'Star'-" Sonata giggled as Aria crossed her arms, "-Sonata's is 'Punch'-" Aria slugged Sonata on an unarmored part of her arm, earning a plaintive whine, "-Sunset is 'Jacket'-" Sunset still liked the look, "-and mine is-" she immediately crumpled the note, "-eh, Heels."

Aria and Sonata turned their heads to look at each other for a split second, then lunged to grab Adagio's arms. "Quick," Aria said to Sunset, "get the note!"

"Gyah!" Adagio struggled and kicked in their grip. "LET GO OF ME, YOU IDIOTS!!"

Feeling oddly mischievous, Sunset did as she was asked, snatching the paper and unfolding it to find out what Adagio was trying to hide.

"D-don't you dare read-"

"Snrk!"

Aria was audibly smirking. "What's it say?" Sonata had already started giggling.

"Nothing," Adagio answered with a hint of desperation, "th-there's no point the names and masks anyway, right? I mean, we won't really-"

Sunset couldn't help herself. "It saaaays..."

"SUNSET!!"

"Sorry, Dagi!"

"I swear I'll-"

"Her nickname is Fluffy!"

Letting go of Adagio's arms, Aria and Sonata immediately howled with laughter, Sunset holding her sides and nearly falling over as she joined in. About forty-five seconds later, the mad giggling was dying down, Sunset just noticing Adagio's stance.

They couldn't see her face through the mask, which was no doubt beet-red, but Adagio was just standing still. One fist was clenched, the other holding a gun that wasn't being used to silence the laughter, and Adagio said nothing until the others quieted down. Her tone was surprisingly calm. "Done? Finished?"

"Yea," Aria answered with a voice that could be mistaken for friendly as she patted Adagio's shoulder, "I think we're good."

Sonata stepped closer to give their fuzz-addled leader a one-armed hug. "Sorry about that, but it is pretty funny!"

Under her mask, Sunset gaped. Some little part of her was ashamed to have not even thought about the feelings of anyone involved here before reading the note, but this wasn't at all the reaction she'd have expected. No violent outbursts, no threats, empty or otherwise, no harsh retorts, no retort at all! And Aria and Sonata stopped laughing before Sunset had!

Did she really take my advice? Have they already toned it down to just this?! It's been a few weeks, but-

Adagio was shaking her. "Wake up!"

"Aah! S-sorry!"

Sunset sensed another eye-roll. "We need to get at least six bags worth of valuables, now let's move."

"Sure thing," offered Aria, "lead the way... Fluffy."

Sonata giggled, but Adagio didn't even look at them. Picking up her shotgun, Sunset opted to change the topic. "So, where's this bank, anyway?"

Adagio pointed across the street. To a building full of people that apparently didn't notice the four girls in full combat gear and crazy masks carrying on just twenty meters away.

Following the others to the entrance, Sunset had a really bad feeling about what they were about to do. And not just for the obvious reasons.

Author's Note:

Sunset is okay with robbing a bank and shooting people! Is it all a dream? Are they playing parts in a movie? Something else? Make your guesses below for the chance to win Feel Super Smart when it's all over! :pinkiehappy:

This isn't necessarily a crossover in the traditional sense, in that no actual characters from the games will be making an appearance, but I'd be lying if I said this wasn't "Payday 2 with Sunset and the Dazzlings."

Been piecing this story together over the course of the summer. Finally ready to start sharing it!