Discovery [Part 2]
Dr. Jackson moved with a certainty and purpose that really raised the question of whether he had been to the city before. Despite the low lighting, the emergency power having only brought the levels up from 'dark' to 'technically acceptable,' the many-years-dead decorative plants, and the overall chill that lingered and clung to everything, he just had an air of knowing what he was doing and where he was going. He did point out a few features to Floyd and the security officer that accompanied them as they walked, which were, in his opinion, quite interesting.
"Six flights of stairs wasn't that bad, now was it?" he said, only lightly winded from the effort. He never did slack off from the workout routines he adopted while serving on Stargate Command's flagship team SG-1. Habits formed after nearly a decade were hard to break. "Once Carter and her team get the full power working we'll have access to the transporters for getting around, though."
They walked past two hallways before taking a sudden right, following some cues neither Floyd nor the officer recognized. Daniel's thick composition book, its pages filled with handwritten notes, printouts, and more, probably helped, as he checked it occasionally during the walk. "Okay, assuming the layout of Shangri-La is not too different from that of Atlantis, the archives room should be right about," he stopped by a door and pointed, "here."
It was largely unremarkable, looking like every other door they passed, with the only addition being the plaque with strangely geometric characters cut into it. "A 'Holographic Interface Room,'" Dr. Jackson translated. He waved his hand in front of the door controls, frowning at the three crystals when they didn't respond. It took two more tries before the unit glowed and the doors slid open with a soft hiss. "The Atlantis team took to calling it the Archives Room."
The room was, at first glance, unimpressive. A single podium was attached to a low platform composed of multiple metal framed glass hexagons. He smiled in a bit of a nostalgic fashion.
"Uh... doc..." Floyd spoke up, interrupting his thoughts, "looks like someone was here before us..." Floyd pointed at the podium, a figure slumped against the back of it.
Dr. Jackson swiftly walked over to Floyd and the body. Be it the cold that had claimed the city, the minimal life support, chance, or all of the above, it wa still fairly intact. He made a face and scratched at his cheek. "Ooo, I was afraid of this. We don't know what actually happened to the Shangrians. Considering everything we know about the Ancients, we didn't expect to find anyone alive in the city, barring another time travel situation..." He looked up at Floyd and the officer, who were staring at him in confusion. "Ah, long story. But the point is, it looks like Shangri-La wasn't exactly properly evacuated before they shut it down."
"But what about the system lock out they found?" the security officer, Graiden, asked. "Wasn't that to keep people from getting in? Does this mean it didn't work?"
"It depends. Were they trying to lock something out, or lock something away?" Dr. Jackson replied cryptically. He pulled on a pair of gloves from one of his pockets, and carefully eased the body away from the podium. "The Ancients eventually suffered from a plague, and that's aside from their conflict with the Ori, and the war with the Wraiths. We know that eventually they gave up fighting and decided to focus on either living out what time they had left, or ascending. Even assuming the Shangrians left before the war started properly, the plague might have caught up with them."
He tapped his radio. "Jackson to Carter, come in."
"Carter here," the radio crackled.
"We found a body in the Archives Room. Might be one of the original inhabitants," Jackson said.
"You're not the only one," General Carter responded with a sigh. "Looks like we will have quite a bit of... housekeeping to do."
"Fun," Dr. Jackson said dryly. "Anyway, I'd like to have Mr. Hendrix get the system running here. How's power coming?"
"Not long now," General Carter said with a grunt. "It's our bit of good news. A full set of Zero Point Modules, low on power, but not depleted. Enough power for most of our needs. We could even fly the thing if we needed to. We'll have full power up in a moment." The lights flicked and with a low hum flared to proper levels. "And that moment is now. Nice work, Jonsson." Someone in the background said something the radio didn't quite pick up.
"We'll let you know what we find out," Dr. Jackson nodded.
"Keep in touch. Carter out."
Dr. Jackson sighed, shoulders slumping. He nodded at Floyd. "Well, just step up to the podium and put your hands on it. It should activate in response to your gene."
Floyd nodded, stepping up to the podium. He cast a glance at the body, placing his hand on the podium. The podium glowed, springing to life, and Daniel motioned for him to step down now that it had been activated. A faint glimmer caught his eye, and as he turned he noticed a necklace on the body. He knelt down, getting a better look; it was gold, inset with a purple star-shaped gem. He reached out, tracing his fingers over it. He winced, pulling his hand back, as he felt a bit of a sting.
"Yeah, you might want to be careful about what you touch when you have the gene," Dr. Jackson warned belatedly. "The strangest things react to it in the strangest ways. You might want to take a few meditation classes if you find things in the city start acting up around you."
"I'll keep that in mind Doc, thanks," Floyd spoke up, reaching out and carefully removing the necklace. "Is it uh... alright if I keep this?" he asked, holding it out.
"I'm going to say... maybe," Dr. Jackson said. "New alien city. We have an idea of what everything should do, but not what everything is, exactly." A certain Wraith tracking device came to mind. "Once we've gotten settled, we can have someone look it over to make sure it's not hazardous, but assuming you don't mind keeping the necklace from a deceased Ancient, sure.
"Oh, and before you ask," he added quickly, "a lot of things that were harmless for Ancients can be deadly for us. Not everything, but you can never tell at times. They were more advanced, both technologically and biologically."
"Joy," he said, placing the necklace around his neck. "Well, let's hope I don't hulk out or something..." He stood up, running a hand through his hair. "OK... this thing is on..." He moved over to the bag he had brought with him, quickly starting to set up a tripod. "I assume you know what I'm supposed to be doing here?" he asked, getting the camera ready.
A figure appeared above the platform. If it wasn't for the faint glow to their clothes and skin, one wouldn't think they were a hologram. Male, he was dressed in pale robes, his features looking on the indian side. He looked towards the podium with a weary smile. "To you who have found our city... I welcome you to the Kingdom of Harmony, Shangri-La.
"Long ago our people dwelled among the stars of another galaxy with our brothers and sisters. We learned, we explored, we progressed. But in time, a rift grew as our ideals and theirs began to differ. Rather than fall into conflict more than we already had, we gathered our like-minded allies and departed the galaxy of Pegasus to hide away from those with whom we could no longer agree.
"Our journey through the stars brought us to a new galaxy, one we called Concordia, in hopes that Harmony and Friendship would be our new legacy, not conflict and reprehensible actions. As were our ways, we planted gates anew, spreading new roads between stars for exploration and curiosity, but with no intentions of arrogantly seeding life as we and our brothers did in the long past. We landed here on the world we called Shambhala, intending to better ourselves and seek the paths of Enlightenment, Harmony and Happiness, but always waiting should our brothers turn their backs on the horrors they fostered in turn.
"To our surprise, life was already here," another image appeared, this one of a blue coated, horse-like creature, coming up to his waist. It had large green eyes, its mane and tail yellow. "We call them the amaquinae. When we first arrived here, they were just beginning to form a society. Seeing the potential they held, we taught them: how to read, how to write, how to build, and we have helped them spread amongst the stars." He threw his arms out to emphasize his point.
"We, in turn, learned from them how to influence the forces of the universe at will. Feats that we thought impossible without our technology or the efforts of one far along the path of ascension, their little ones could perform with ease despite being far from advanced enough to ascend." A glowing orb formed in his hand and he was flanked by an image of the concordia galaxy. "An ability developed due to the unique nature of this galaxy, it was one that once learned, allowed one to draw minute amounts power from subspace, and influence real space with it.
"Originally we called it 'Mastery of Natural Forces,' shortened to Mastery, known as magia as its original name was preserved, even as language shifted. Our star was ascendant, our futures, those of our own and of the amaquinae, was shining. But it was not to be." His expression fell.
"Once again, the origin conflict of our people has found us. We, the Shangrians, are succumbing to the Plague. Despite the efforts of our brothers the Lanteans and the Alterans, we have found no solution. Not even our own research in magicks has borne fruit. Our time has come. We have cut ties with our allies and withdrawn in seclusion into our great city, our shield raised to prevent others from potentially being infected and hid us away. We will die, and the great sickness will die with us, whether here or at our original home.
"To you who have found our city; you are our kin, descendants. Shangri-La, the shining city, is your birthright. I only ask that you learn as we did, spreading Harmony, advancing knowledge, and lending aid to those who need it. Until that day, our city shall sleep, a hidden wonder waiting to spread light and hope once more."
The man lowered his head and folded his arms. The shifting of his robe revealed the same necklace Floyd was now wearing just before the hologram faded away.
"That was something..." Floyd commented, looking up from the viewfinder of his camera. He touched the necklace, which seemed to shimmer a little at the contact.
"Jackson, you there?" Carter's voice crackled over the radio.
"Wow... I mean yes, yes I'm here," Dr. Jackson said, a bit distracted by the story and the implications. "Just checking, but we did prove that the only way to get the plague was from a living infected ancient, right?"
"As far as I recall. Anyway, we uh... have a situation here in the gate room, and I could certainly use your help. You might want to tell Mr. Hendrix to have his camera ready, this is big."
"And I'm guessing it can't wait," Dr. Jackson said with resignation. "So since the lights are on, any chance the transporters are working?"
"Sorry, Daniel," Gen. Carter's response came. "We have primary systems up and life support, but my team has only just started on translating the secondary systems."
"Of course they are," Daniel sighed. "We'll be up as soon as we can." The radio crackled as Carter disconnected. "Well, did you get all the footage, Hendrix?"
"Yeah, I got it," he said with a nod, dismantling the tripod. "This is all going to be a nightmare to edit... eh, that's future Floyd's problem." He slung his bag over his shoulder, hefting the camera up.
"You're taking this awfully well," Graiden muttered to Floyd.
"I'm still not convinced this isn't just some dream. I just hope I don't end up like those guys from 'Trollhunter'," he mumbled as they left the room, dreading the coming gauntlet of stairs.
"N-now is this really necessary?" Lyra asked one of what she assumed were guards, pointing a strange black object at her head. "We uh... come in peace?" She held her hooves up, trembling, and gave a weak smile.
"I am Princess Mi Amore Cadenza, and I demand to know what is going on!" Cadance glared, narrowing her eyes at the beings that had surrounded them, standing in front of the other mares protectively.
The two security guards standing between the three and the rest of the room kept their weapons carefully aimed, one of them tilting his head to speak into the block object on his chest. "Sir, they are speaking and seem agitated. Advise?"
The rest of the room was in a curious state. The two creatures that had been behind them had scuttled off, the section of the wall they had been working on having stopped glowing. The rest of their kind had drawn back and away from them, leaving the two almost-certainly-guards aiming what had to be weapons at them. They had a bearing more akin to the army or the military wing of the Wonderbolts than to the often-ceremonial royal guards. Shame they were left behind when whatever spell that was foalnapped them. Snatches of conversation came from around the room.
"...are intelligent! The indigenous life? But the city was clearly abandoned..."
"...don't make this be the wraith all over again. I left Atlantis to get away from that crap!"
"...the General and Dr. Jackson are on their way, keep working. See if this gate has a shield as well. And see if you can get a head start on whatever that thing is..."
"Teams three and seven are only a third of the way to the proposed points, no way we can interface the generators in time..."
"Do not fire!" That one made them jump. It seemed to come from the box on the guard's chest. Both their chests. "Circumstances are unknown at the moment, and treat them as such. Do not make the situation hostile. I'm pulling my team back to the gate room."
"Yes sir." The guards both lowered their weapons, though they did not put them away. The closer one motioned for the mares to move. "Step away from the device."
"Please," the other one added, a fleeting look of irritation, aimed at his companion, crossing his expression. "Could you step away from the device, please. Er, Princess Me-amoray Kay Denza, was it? We'll see if we can sort this out."
Cadance watched them carefully. "Stay close to me," she told the others as she moved to an empty part of the room. Lyra and Bon Bon followed quickly, with Bon Bon looking rather calm in the face of the situation. "And it's Mi Amore Cadenza." She snorted.
The guard could only shrug helplessly. He had never been in a first contact situation before. And this was definitely in top ten, maybe even top five first contacts the SGC had encountered. It was the downside of being in galaxies populated primarily with transplanted humans. Besides, he was just a security officer. He hardly had authority to make calls on something like this. "Well Mi- Princess Cadenza, I hope you don't mind waiting until our leaders arrive."
Names had been swiftly given to the areas of the City, for the sake of convenience. The Central Spire was mostly what they had explored so far. The layout of Stargate Operations in Shangri-La was almost identical to that of Atlantis. The large room that contained the stargate, a large open court of sorts, also contained the device the aliens had appeared from. The level above held an array of consoles and controls for the city. For convenience, the expedition members had already taken to calling them the Gate Room and Control Room.
It was in the latter that the technicians and scientist were trying their best to get Shangri-La's systems married to the interfaces and computers they brought from earth. The suddenness of the aliens' arrival was the major complication. They had not been in the city for long, far too short a period to get anything done. With the power only just being restored, and most of the systems still offline, what they could do was limited. Still, it would be for the best if they could gather what they could about what happened for the General to look over and access.
She was, after all, one of the greatest minds their world had to offer.
The awkward moment stretched on. The guards were unwilling to talk with the three for reasons of their own. The scientists, civilian members and others busied themselves with other tasks, trying not to stare too long. The Asgard were known to dislike being stared at. Humans were, too. For their part, the mares conversed in hushed tones they desperately hoped wouldn't carry too far.
"Lyra, you're the one with the interest. Any idea where we are?" Bon Bon asked, hardly looking flustered, though her eyes darted around the room. "Or what these ponies are? They obviously aren't ponies. But they don't look like minotaurs either. Or griffons. Or anything I can think of, for that matter."
"Nope!" Lyra said, a quaver in her tone. She pawed at the ground with her hoof. "W-wait..." She said, taking a look around, her eyes going wide. "Bonny... they look like the descriptions of The Teachers..." she said, almost breathlessly.
"The Teachers..? Didn't you do a paper on that back in school?" Cadance asked softly, not letting her gaze drift too far from the guards. Her horn glowed slightly as she covertly wove a subtlety spell around them. "I remember Quill Point wanted to throw it out for being based on myth but admitted it was well written."
"They said the same thing about Nightmare Moon and Discord," Lyra replied.
"Okay, but how? You're far from the first pony to touch the heart," Cadance hissed, trying to make sense of it. "How did we somehow end up mingling with your Teachers?"
Lyra thought about hard. "I... don't know. Maybe it sensed there was one pony who believed in them?"
"Hopefully we can get some answers," Bon Bon cut in, pointing at the door as a rather important looking figure walked in, flanked by guards.
"Are these them?" Carter asked, looking at the guards who were watching the equines.
"Yes, ma'am, this is uh... Princess Cadenza and her two comrades," one spoke up.
"Greetings Princess, my name is General Samantha Carter. May I ask how you got here?" Carter asked, trying to be as friendly and polite as possible.
'A military rank,' Cadance instantly thought. With her husband being a former captain of the guard, and she herself technically holding rank as a princess, she was moderately familiar with military structures. It made her somewhat uneasy, though she didn't let it show as she let the subtlety spell break. "We, that is myself and my companions, were investigating unusual activity in my nation's central artifact just before something teleported us here with a powerful spell."
"Well we certainly didn't do it," Carter said, looking toward the door as Jackson and his group came in.
"Is that a pink pegacorn?" Floyd blurted out, aiming the camera at Cadance, who didn't look happy at all, giving him a rather dirty look. Carter gave him one of mild reprimand.
"A horned Pterippus, or winged unicorn, depending on which mythology you look at it from," Dr. Jackson offered, his own gaze analytical. "I take it this is our emergency?"
"I'm an alicorn," Cadance snorted indignantly.
"Yes Daniel," Carter acknowledged with a nod, "This is Princess Cadenza and her two friends, who I don't think have been introduced yet."
"My name is Lyra Heartstrings and I'm an archeologist," she pulled Bon Bon close, "And this is my marefriend Bon Bon! She's a candy maker." She pulled away, gingerly stepping up to Carter, her head level with the woman's stomach. "Are you the Teachers?"
"The Teachers?" Carter echoed.
"Ah, I believe it's their name for the Ancients. You know, like ancestors, teachers of roads, gate builders, great ones," Dr. Jackson proposed softly. He cleared his throat. "No, we aren't. We know them as the Ancients. They did build this city though. And more like it, as well as a whole lot of other things that, I really don't have time to get into right now. They moved on though, reached a higher plane of existence. You could say we are their descendants though."
"But they did exist?" Lyra pressed, looking up at him with big eyes.
Jackson nodded, "I've met several, myself. Did you say you were an archaeologist?" A flash of understanding sparked in Dr. Jackson's eyes and he gave Lyra a smile. "No one wants to believe your theories on the Teachers?"
"No, I'm a laughing stock... but not anymore!" Lyra said with a smirk. "I was right and they were wrong!" She got up onto her hind legs, doing a little off balance dance.
"Lyra!" Bon Bon hissed, pulling her back onto her hooves, "This is no time for dancing!"
"You're just jelly." Lyra pouted, looking away.
Dr. Jackson laughed. "Believe me, I understand how she feels. I've been treated exactly the same way on my own planet. The feeling I had when my first theories were proven right? Still some of my best memories. And I've proven so many more since then. I have done a victory dance or two myself."
"Excuse me, General," Cadance cut in, "but I would like to know where we are at the moment."
"Well, the truth is, we're not really sure ourselves," Gen. Carter said. "We only recently occupied the city, and while we know how to run most of the systems, we haven't turned them on yet. Your visit was a bit of a surprise."
"How is that coming anyway?" Daniel asked, looking over at the techs who were busy with their computers.
"We just got the connection established, sir," the tech said, looking over his shoulder. "I'm going to try to bring up a status report on the city." He turned back to his computer, the keyboard clicking away as be worked. On one of the consoles, a diagram of the city appeared, with various lines of Ancient text around it. "Uh ma'am, you might want to see this," he said, waving Carter over.
"If you'll excuse me," General Carter said. "Daniel, if you'd take care of our guests?"
Dr. Jackson sighed and looked at the security officer. "Is the command office in the same place?"
"Yes, sir."
"Furnished?"
"Yes, sir."
"Okay then," Dr. Jackson nodded. "If you three will follow me, we can sit and talk for a while until General Carter gets things a little more sorted out."
"Stay close," Cadance instructed the other mares as they followed Daniel up the stairs and out of the room.
"What do you mean she is missing, Shining Armor?" Princess Celestia asked, looking down at her former captain of the guard. She had come to visit her niece, only to find that the Princess of Love had gone missing.
"There was something wrong with the Crystal Heart and Cadie went to investigate." Shining gulped softly. "She and two citizens vanished suddenly and without any trace."
"Shining Armor, I'm not upset with you," Princess Celestia said soothingly to her nephew-in-law. "I'm only concerned that my niece is missing. Did anypony see what happened?"
"The guards that were with her did, as well as several civilians," he nodded, motioning for her to follow him. "I have them in one of the meeting rooms, unless you want to visit the Heart first."
"Yes, that would be for the best," Princess Celestia mused. It wouldn't do for her to appear bearing down on her subjects expecting them to hold all the answers. She may even learn something from visiting the Heart, though she was far from an expert in its capabilities, even before it vanished with the city, letting the fog of both time and the curse have its way with what she had known.
"It would be best if we avoided making a fuss over this. Our ponies are likely already stirred up by the disappearance of their princess." It was most fortunate it was the Heart itself involved, making it less likely for anypony to jump to darker fears rapidly. "A bare minimum escort. You and I only if at all possible."
"Of course," he said with a nod, moving through the hall. "Maybe it was a trap left by Sombra?" He wouldn't put it past the tyrant to booby trap the one thing that could kill him.
"It was one of my fears, yes," Celestia admitted as she followed Shining, her longer strides easily matching his pace without seeming to be more than a stroll. "But the Heart has been used at least twice since the Empire's return, not to mention the steady influx of positive emotions from the crystal ponies. Any enchantment he left behind should have long been eroded by the constant exposure to light and love magics, the antithesis to his abilities."
"According to a few witnesses, one of the ponies taken said something about the Heart being connected to a place called 'Shangri-La.' Does that mean anything to you, Princess? Nopony in the Empire seems to know anything about it."
Celestia's brow furrowed. The name stirred something in her, a memory long forgotten? A fillyhood tale perhaps? Her mouth opened, then closed hesitantly. She walked in silence for a few more steps. Shangri-La. That name was important for some reason. "I'm not sure, Shining Armor. Perhaps a discussion with my sister might yield results."
"Hopefully we'll find some answers from the Heart," he said as they came to it. It was still pulsing, with the strange transparent screens floating around it, "Those appeared right before they vanished." He nodded to the guards who had taken up positions around the Heart. "Nopony knows what the writing means."
The Princess stared at the characters in mute shock. For a fleeting moment, an image came to her. Somepony scrawling characters much like those on a board on a morning so very long ago, then it was gone.
"Princess?" Shining Armor asked a little worriedly, seeing her staring at the Heart. "Are you all right?"
Celestia blinked once, twice, three times in total before she recovered. Her expression was troubled, but she studied the writing some more under Shining's worried gaze. "This mystery... may be deeper than I feared," she admitted. "This language... scholars tend to call it one of the more obscure forms of unicorn cuneiform for the older dialects, but the truth is, it is far older. If I recall, it was old when I was but a filly... I fear I may not even recall how to interpret this fully." There were a few words she could still recognize, but not enough.
The Empire had always been a mystery, even before Sombra somehow worked that curse to muddle the knowledge of it. But this raised more questions than anything had since Discord himself ruled. "Shining Armor, has anypony used magic in this area since they vanished?"
"Not that I know of," he said shaking his head, "What are you thinking, Princess?"
"I'm thinking of finding them," Celestia said simply before igniting her horn. A brilliant gold light flared, obscuring everything with its brightness. It lasted for a few seconds before Celestia let it fade to a dull glow around her horn. As it did, colourful contrails wavered in the air, winding around all those present, some thick and strong, other wispy and fading. Celestia's eyes darted from one rippling band of colour to another.
"How far will you be able to track them?" he asked, his eyes moving from contrail to contrail, "They could have been taken anywhere, even across the continent." He frowned at the idea, wondering just who or what they were dealing with.
"Give me a few moments Shining Armor, and I shall find out." She intensified her spell, trying to find Cadance's aura. An alicorn's magic trace wasn't hard to identify. What worried her was that it wasn't where it was supposed to be. There was a small void in the area around the Heart. To use a mundane analogy, it was as if someone washed a slate with a cleanser. It was easy to find the traces of what was used, but what had been there was missing. The contrail of her niece's magic left to the Heart, then it was gone, a haze of magic she didn't recognize replacing it. "Shining Armor." She turned to look at the stallion.
"Yes?"
"Send for my sister, I believe this mystery will require the both of us."
"We have good news and bad news, General Carter." Despite not having the most experience with Ancient technology, Devon had found himself working with the team setting up and interpreting the consoles for the city. It was the way it worked out in the isolated bases and expeditions. They picked members who were adaptable over just simply skilled. Just being capable and having the gene got him assigned to connecting a few laptops to terminals. Of course, he wasn't the one reporting to her; that was one of the more senior technicians.
"Let's start with the bad news," General Carter said to the short and somewhat mousy woman. "Wilson, right?"
"Yes ma'am," Wilson smiled. "The bad news; because we were running a few diagnostics on the device when it activated," she motioned subtly in the direction of the conference room, "it's now locked up mid-process, and it looks like one or two of the receiving crystals might have gotten damaged in the process."
"Receiving crystals?" Carter said, looking up from the tablet she had been given. "So it's a transporter?"
"Part of the good news ma'am. We figured out it's a type of Ancient transporter device." Wilson paused. She looked down at her own tablet. "Should I continue the bad news?"
"Go ahead, Wilson," Carter nodded.
"Well, we've started getting preliminary readings from the city's sensors now that power is flowing again. The shields are running at minimal power."
"Please tell me we aren't at the bottom of an ocean," Carter said, closing her eyes and shaking her head. To be fair, Daniel had told her there were more sunken city legends than just Atlantis.
"No ma'am," Wilson quickly responded.
"A glacier isn't much better," Devon murmured. Realizing that Carter overheard him, he quickly added, "ma'am."
"So we are on a glacier?" The general wasn't exactly thrilled with that news.
"And somewhat in it," Wilson continued. "There's a buildup of ice around the city's substructure and around the shield. The city itself has only reported minor damage, so that's part of the good news. The rest; the environment is more or less habitable. Acceptable levels of oxygen and all the other required gases. The temperature is around five degrees fahrenheit, though."
"So going outside isn't recommended," Carter murmured. "Anyone else have anything of importance?"
"We're picking up some weird gravitational anomalies but we won't know more until we get more systems online," Wilson tapped away at her computer, "You may want to have a look at the gate ma'am, seems they changed a lot from the Pegasus network."
"The gate will have to wait for now," Carter admitted. It was their only lifeline back home at the moment, but there were other priorities. She said as much, "While being able to dial Earth is important, particularly for morale, so are other things. Suitable living quarters for everyone, for instance. Atlantis survived months without being able to make contact. A few days aren't going to hurt us.
"And then there is the matter of our unexpected guests. And if more will show up." She flipped through the information on the tablet and brought up the preliminary report on the device. "As cruel as it might sound, it may be a good thing that the device was damaged. It buys us time to get settled and figure out what's going on."
"Agreed, General," Bowers said, having finally made his way back to the control room.
"I may be able to help out with who they are," Floyd spoke up, having been reviewing the footage he had so far. "I know you can just go down to the archive room but I think this can save the trip." He clicked away at his laptop, bringing up the recording of the hologram, pressing play and turning the laptop for her.
It was mostly in silence that they watched the recording. True, the camera didn't give the hologram its full justice, but it was sufficient to get the point across. Soon most of the people in the control room where enthralled by the footage. The 'wow' factor was clear on their faces, though Carter and Bowers were clearly putting some serious thought into the matter.
"So that's why Dr. Jackson was asking about the plague," one of them commented.
"So the lockdown was more an internal safety measure? Okay, check the access logs again, we have a better idea of what to look for," another said, turning back to his station.
"You do fast work," Carter complemented Floyd.
"Thank you ma'am," Floyd said with a smile, "But most of it is just luck." He turned the laptop back toward himself, "Going to be a pain to edit though. Also, I'd like to set up interviews with some of the crew when everything is settled, if that's alright?"
Carter's smile momentarily had an edge to it, but it faded quickly. "That shouldn't be an issue." He nodded, busying himself with his work.
"This is really the Teachers' city?" Lyra asked, looking out of the office, her eyes wide. "This is awesome!" She squeed, clapping her forehooves together, a big smirk on her face. "Please! You've got, got to tell me everything!" She bounded over to Daniel, placing her hooves on his lap. "Please?" She asked, giving him her best pouty face. Pony eyes were notorious for emotional manipulation, usually by foals on their parents.
"Lyra!" Bon Bon hissed, biting onto her marefriend's tail, pulling her away from Daniel. "You're embarrassing us!" She spat out her tail, glaring at her. "I'm sorry, she gets weird when she's this excited." Lyra stuck her tongue out, crossing her arms.
Inwardly, Daniel was glad that the other... mare stopped her friend. She was better at the eyes than Vala was. Even if he kept being reminded of himself from a decade and a half or so before. The terminology was interesting. Amaquinae called their females 'mare.' The translation must have taken some liberties. "'Everything' would take a bit too much time. The history of the Ancients, the Teachers as you call them, goes back some tens of millions of years. This city, for example, should be at least ten thousand years old, being very conservative. Likely more."
"Wow..." Lyra said, her eyes widening at the thought of so much history.
"Ten thousand years?" Cadance echoed with a gobsmacked expression. "That... that makes it far older than Equestria's recorded history... even older than most of our stories... pre-Discordian..." She lost some of her royal bearing as she looked about the room, no longer caring about the guards that had followed and stood just inside the doors. "But this place... it looks more modern than even Canterlot!"
Daniel raised an eyebrow and took a few mental notes. Canterlot? Did Moros once visit? Questions for later. "We tend to have the same reaction. The Ancients were basically The Race. The most powerful and advanced race for countless millennia. Even during their decline they were still a force to be reckoned with until they all, for the most part, ascended."
"Do you want to know anything about us?" Bon Bon asked, "You don't really seem to know anything about us, hay your guards couldn't even get the princess' name right," she pointed out, sitting next to Lyra.
"I think an exchange of information is a wonderful idea," Cadance agreed, "Since you've already told us about these...Ancients why don't you ask us a question? It would be wise for us to get to know each other."
That offer certainly caught Daniel off guard. He wasn't used to dealing with such candid individuals. Of course, an offer of a question didn't necessarily equate a promise of truth. Worse still, a dozen questions lay at the tip of his tongue. She called herself a princess. That implied a monarchy. Would her nation rise up against them for inadvertently holding an heir to the crown hostage? What significance were the horns? The amaquinae from the recording lacked them. Much more the wings. How exactly had they ended up in the city?
"Alicorn," he said, choosing a different question. "You called yourself an alicorn. The word is part of my people's mythology, but I don't think it means the same thing. What is an alicorn?"
"Alicorns are among the rarest types of ponies, and they have the attributes of all three of the tribes: the strength of an earth pony, the wings of a pegasus and the magic of a unicorn. There are only three in the world, myself, my aunt Celestia and her sister Luna, though I was originally a pegasus," Cadance explained, giving her wings a flap for emphasis.
"I'm just a unicorn and Bonny is an earth pony." Lyra pointed out, hopefully to make the point clearer.
"Now that's interesting..." Daniel said, his eyes slightly vacant as he processed the new information. Such as 'pony.' "Unicorns, at least horned horses, are fairly common in Earth mythology. There are also winged horses, well, one. Pegasus was the son of Poseidon. The commonalities... you call the Ancients 'Teachers.' That must mean they had an influence on your society as they did in ours, though in our case their mark is a bit more obvious." Daniel had stopped paying full attention to the trio as his thoughts raced. "Of course. The Shangrians didn't have a war fighting. They must have had more opportunities to travel back to Earth than the Lanteans did. And... wait..."
Daniel blinked and looked curiously at Cadance. "Did you say magic?"
"Yup!" Lyra chirped, her horn suddenly becoming surrounded by a golden glow. A nearby long dead plant became surrounded by the same glow, floating up into the air. "Tada!" she proclaimed proudly.
Daniel's face ran through a gauntlet of expressions. Raised eyebrows gave way to an attempt to point with his finger, then a tight lipped moment, before he licked his lips and scratched his cheek. He attempted to point again, but a pout aborted it halfway, and he had to settle for an open mouth stare. It wasn't that that sort of thing wasn't possible. For crying out loud, he had done it before when Merlin advanced his state of evolution, not to mention all the things he pulled off when ascended, but... magic?
"I take it your kind can't use magic?" Cadance asked, noticing his expression.
"I used to say there was no such thing as magic, but considering all I've seen, I just gave up." Daniel shook his head slowly.
"Oh, that sounds horrible," Lyra placed the plant back on the ground. She moved over to him, getting up on her hind legs and giving him a hug.
Daniel just blinked, looking down at the green unicorn that was hugging him. "Why are you uh... hugging me?"
"Because you looked sad," Lyra answered simply, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. "And the best way to get rid of sadness is with a hug!"
"I think that's enough, Lyra," Cadance said, pulling Lyra back gently. "Sorry," she said with an apologetic smile. "Ponies are very um..." she gestured with her hooves, "affectionate. Anyway I believe it's our question: how did you get here?"
"Well..." Daniel quickly assembled and censored the standard spiel. Considering the amount of experience they had doing that, it was little more than a beat. "We are explorers. My people are called humans. We come from a world called Earth. It was the first world the Ancients, the Teachers, settled when they came to this side of the universe millions of years ago. My people are actually the second evolution of their form. When they ascended to a higher plane, they left a lot of their history, knowledge and technology behind.
"Humans are a curious race. A couple of years back we found the Stargate, a device able to send you across thousands of lightyears in an instant. The large ring you saw was a Stargate, most likely the only one on the planet. The, er, Teachers made them and put them in at least four galaxies."
"Forgive me but, that seems a little hard to believe," Bon Bon said, frowning. "You're telling me that a whole race ascended into alicorns? That seems very far-fetched."
"Alicorns? Uh, no. An energy based existence of remarkable power," Daniel explained a little. "Knowing them, a few might be listening to us now. But they never interfere with the lower planes. It's 'beneath them' and against their 'rules.' A bit of a pain, to be honest."
"But you said they ascended," Lyra pointed out, "And alicorns only come from ascension."
"She's right, like I said, I was originally a pegasus," Cadance reaffirmed.
"Possibly a case of the same name for different processes," Daniel frowned. "I have ascended myself and I know for a fact I didn't get hooves and wings."
"Too bad, you probably would have made a great looking stallion," Lyra teased only to wince when Bon Bon socked her in the shoulder.
"I believe you have the floor," Bon Bon said rather flatly, glaring at her marefriend.
"Right," Daniel said, narrowing his eyes slightly. "Let's go with this one, Princess Cadance, who is the queen of your kingdom?"
"Queen?" Cadance asked, the concept seeming rather foreign to her. "I don't believe Equestria has ever had a queen. I'm not sure about the Empire, we're still piecing together the Empire's history."
"So your culture's highest government figure is a princess. Not the strangest structure we have encountered. There are tribes where their most important leader is simply the 'Big Man' or 'Chief Chief.'" His hands, having been waving in the air, slowly lowered, the realization sinking in. "Which would make you one of your nation's rulers."
"Why don't we just give a run-down of Equestrian history?" Lyra asked. "Then you can share your people's history!" Lyra smiled, wagging her tail like an excited dog.
"I really don't think that's the best idea, Lyra," Bon Bon interjected.
"As much as I would enjoy that, your friend's right," Daniel said, setting his hands on the table. "Right now, it's more important to build a rapport between us while we see how we can get everything sorted out. To become friends, as it were. After, we can foster a proper relationship between our people, establish trade and perhaps an exchange of knowledge."
"You'll find that ponies are very easy to make friends with, it even saved us from extinction," Cadance said. "Anyway, I do believe that it is our question. Who is the leader of your people?"
"Locally? That would be General Carter," Daniel said easily. "You met her. She is the leader and commander of the Shangri-La Expedition. I head the Science and Research Department and represent the civilian population. Colonel Bowers is the military commander. Dr. Juan is our Chief Medical officer. You'll likely be visited by her sometime soon. Talking about the leaders of our world is a bit more complicated, and not particularly relevant this far from home."
Daniel had long since learned how to read people and their body language. He later learned how to apply those skills to the Goa'uld, the Asgard, the Tok'ra, the Unas, the Serrakin and even the Wraith. The Amaquinae, the ponies, were a bit different, but a lot of the cues were the same, their eyes particularly expressive. The ears and tail provided even further clues, and he was beginning to pick up on what they meant.
Lyra looked extremely fascinated with everything he was saying, hanging on to every word, her tail and foreleg twitching occasionally as she gave him her rapt attention. She was like a student in a particularly interesting class of her favourite subject. Bon Bon was listening keenly as well, but she was more reserved. He recognized the calculating look she thought she had hidden behind her expression. There was more to her than he had been told.
The princess' attention was polite and adequate. Though she didn't exactly hide her expressions and her reactions seemed honest, he could tell that there was some rather serious thought going on in her head, maybe more so than Bon Bon. It reminded him just a bit of Dr. Weir, to be honest, a comparison that reflected favourably on the princess.
"I think it would be best if I send a message to my aunt," Cadance said, nodding her head. "Do you have some paper and a quill?"
"Well, we've moved past quills, but I'm fairly certain we are unable to mail a letter. If we could, we would just send you back instead," Daniel said, raising his eyebrow.
"Humor me," Cadance commented, giving him a smile. Lyra had a similar expression on her face, though hers was more the smirk of someone who sees a joke coming and knows someone will be the victim.
"Well, no harm in that. Give me a moment." A pen was no issue. There was one in his top pocket. The paper was a bit trickier. He flipped through his book, looking for a blank sheet, but failed. A quick check of his pockets did eventually find a spare yellow pad. Tugging a leaf free, he slid them over to her.
"Thank you," she said, lifting both in her magic, scribbling away for a moment. Her horn sparked, the paper reduced to ash by a bright green flame, the ashes twirling around flitting out of the room.
Daniel watched her display, expression fairly stunned. Before he could voice his reaction, the ashes quickly returned and the sheet reformed.
"Well, horseapples," Cadance cursed, glaring at the sheet with disdain..
"I take it that was magic?" Daniel said, noting three things at once. The display really did seem linked only to their biology, and she was very precise with her telekinesis. He had never tried writing with his telekinesis when he possessed it, but he had heard Rodney McKay had been able to type on multiple computers at once with his. At the moment, there really was no word aside from 'magic' than he could think of to call it. And finally, her choice of swears. He noted it away for later study.
"Just what exactly was that supposed to do?" he asked.
"Send a message to my aunt," she said, sighing a little. "Looks like that idea is moot."
"I don't know what to say," Daniel admitted. He had been in this position before, both the side of the one cut off and the one who might help, but it never got easier, only easier to not be too despondent over. "Don't worry. Our people would rather have friends than enemies, and friends provide aid when needed.
"You did come at a bad time, before we were properly settled in, but we can still provide you a place to stay until we can get everything working." Daniel paused, remembering something he found in his search for the paper. He pulled it out and set it on the table, eliciting surprised reactions from not only the ponies, but the security officers as well.
"Is that..." Bon Bon sniffed the air to make sure the large rectangle was what she thought it was, "chocolate?"
"I've made a few good friends doing this, including meeting my father-in-law," Daniel chuckled slightly at the fond memories. "Took to keeping one on me a few years ago. It's become something of a tradition with me. Of course, it's missing the wood fire, but I think we can skip that detail. Would you mind sharing this with me?"
They glanced at the Cadance, who nodded with a smile. "I, we, would be honoured."
Daniel unwrapped the candy, broke it in four, and the new friends shared the confection. "It tastes..." Bon Bon searched for the right words, "old."
"Well if you work as a confectioner I suppose you'd be used to higher-quality chocolate than this," Daniel laughed. The ponies joined him. Everything really might be okay.
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What an adorable and tasty way to start a friendship! :D (even though I don't eat chocolate myself.)
I can already tell, Lyra and Danny boy are going to be good friends! :D
And hell, you write out Danial exceedingly well, I love it!
Awesome job on this!
Can't wait for more! :D
I love this story, really have Daniel there when lost at words. Keep up the good work
UPDATE! Was SO looking forward to this and was not disappointed! Eagerly waiting for more
Oh that reminds me, I can't WAIT to read Pinkie's reaction to them
very nice chapter. A could be a little bit better on the formatting (the text itself) but otherwise a good chapter. You managed to get the story started properly. Please do continue.
Lyra and Daniel are going to be very interesting to watch interact. Especially him trying to keep her from making the same mistakes he made along the way.
Oh this is proceeding well. Quality writing so far, you're digging the hooks in deep.
Oooo new chapter!
Thank you for the birthday chapter update. lol
MUST HAVE MORE!!!!!
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Only issue I can see is that Daniel certainly shouldn't have any issue with believing in magic at all at this point.
admittedly, I am not 100% certain where this is in the Stargate timeline, but SG1 has seen at least half a dozen different entities capable of "Magic", and ascended beings certainly have such abilities.
Oma Desala, Nirrti's Creations, Cassandra Fraiser(Telekinesis), Jonas Quin (Precognition), Rodney McKay (Alteran Ascension Acceleration Device), Priors and Adria, Daniel himself (after Merlin/Moros's mind was uploaded into his) High Ranking Wraith (Telepathy/mind control/influence/probing))
Also that is only the blatantly supernatural stuff. Teleportation, Energy shields, Energy weapons, Sarcophagus, Etc, all can be considered magic as well if you want.
6267867 after SGU, current day
6267872 Ah, then its all that plus whatever "magic" show up in SGU.
6267867 Remember too, they have also strongly held to the fact that it's no magic. Advanced technology and science, but no magic. Born mostly from the repeated cases of the goa'uld pretending their tech was magic. There was the memorable time in Season 9's Camelot where he kept trying to say there is no magic before being beamed away, but I can never find a clip. I did link it in case you understand German though.
Another great chapter. Now the information exchange on chocolate can begin.
Tune in next time when everything goes to shit.
Also there needs to be more of this. Like right now.
i.warosu.org/data/g/img/0493/23/1438218044246.jpg
I am really interested in how you'll portray all parties involved and so far I'm liking what I'm seeing with Daniel's being of special mention.
Okay this is hands down the best crossover with the SG universe I've seen so far. I'm a huge Stargate fan myself. Please keep the chapters coming
I also really like the way you are writing Lyra here. I can see a ton of great possible moments between her and Daniel. Also it's great you addressed the idea of communication with Celestia on Cadence's part even if it got blocked (I'm assuming by the shield).
Never let pinkie know about this place... i mean a whole race she could try and befreind
Uhm, is it just my imagination or did Wilson spontaneously change gender halfway through her exchange with Carter?
Anyway, I think it was a great chapter. I always love a First Contact that doesn't end in violence.
Cadence seemed a little crisp and even mildly snobbish at first. But I suppose in that situation, being whisked off to Faust knows where, surrounded by aliens in an unfamiliar place, and trying to protect the two ponies with you, it's understandable that she was a little flustered and short-tempered as a result. Good thing we had Daniel and his chocolate to sort that out!
Btw, Cadence mentioned only three alicorns in existence. Does that mean this story takes place prior to Twilight's ascension?
Chaka! Kakek Chaka so!
I just started reading chapter one about 20 min ago...dear sir,I do believe you are reading my mind.
6267907 That much is true as well. I consider it poor writing however. They have many, many examples of Magic, or Psionics as Scifi tends to call magic, but somehow they never actually even try to name those powers, or come up with an explaination, or otherwise. They claim the Ori are not gods, and yet, unlike the goa'uld, they pretty much are gods. And they don't come up with an alternate explanation.
Regardless, Daniel himself has wielded Psionics/Magic when he was merged with Merlin. His memories of such might be somewhat diminished, but between that and seeing the prior's capabilities, I can't really see him being really fazed at all by seeing magic. He's seen it before. Many, many times.
While they are mostly correct to treat the technology and advanced science as being technology, and not magic, the 'Advanced Evolution" and so on, allowing supernatural abilities was never handled sanely in the show.
I am familier with that scene. Camelot episode, After killing the black knight, I think, and a while before, and before leaving to the battle of the supergate.
6268215
This is taking place during S3, unless something changed while I wasn't looking. Which is entirely possible.
Ascended or not, I pity poor both Daniel and Carter when they finally meet Twilight
You did very well establishing where in the SG-1 universe. Only real criticism I have is you need to provide a clearer period of where in the Equus time-line your story is. [This is a problem that MOST EVERY writer repeats, though, so this isn't aimed solely at you.] Characterizations are well done for both sets of teams. Likes where this is going
6269038 right after the season 3 preimer.
Well, one of the comics says that the Crystal Empire is built on top of a sealed-away race of 'shadow ponies'... hmmm...
Anyway, the Princess, the Unicorn and the Secret Agent continue their adventures!
So I just realized there's a pretty big problem with this whole thing... the Atlantis expedition departed before earth had any starships, so the Stargate was their only option.
A few episodes later in SG-1, they actually took the first finished earth starship to Atlantis (or attempted to... on the other hand, we got Vala Maldoran as a recurring character so that worked out). I think it would make more sense to take a BC304 to try and find this new city. You don't even need to use a ZPM, then, although having one for the ship can easily cut the travel time by a large amount.
This alternative is safer than gating blindly into a city with who knows what dangers in it. A ship can arrive safely and scan the city from orbit.
The key is going to be to make an excuse why a ship couldn't make the trip. Maybe Jackson finds warnings that the planet has substantial defenses against unknown approaching spacecraft (even then, it's likely an earth ship can use data from the Atlantis database to make itself seem like an Ancient ship to any Ancient sensors, but since you guys made these Ancients a splinter group that might not be a good idea anyway).
Also I'm surprised nobody has tried to find the city's control chair. They should be able to get full control of the city from there with just the ATA gene.
Jackson is an archaeologist... I can't imagine he would be OK with Floyd messing with the body before Jackson or someone on his team has a chance to document EVERYTHING. Maybe if Jackson can see it's reacting to the ATA gene he might be more willing for Floyd to take it.
I see what you did there.
Prediction: Ponies are carriers for the Ancient plague, though it doesn't affect them. The expedition team is now infected! (I hope I'm not right!)
Looks like an editing error. You were just talking about humans so you need to qualify this with "Ancients" (or whatever variant) again,
Interesting, so the ponies seem to be stuck here for a bit. The chocolate is a nice callback.
Extra Prediction: The city is actively jamming magic usage as a security mechanism, hence why Celestia can't find Cadence and why Cadence's magic bounced back. The Ancients studied it and it sounds like they incorporated magic into the city somehow.
6269046 Thanks.
6267907 I see your arguement, and raise you Clarke's third law
6269124 If I recall, by the time Atlantis started, the Tau'ri had the prometheus and by the end of the first year of Atlantis the first deadulus class ship was finished. Plus given the rift between the two cities, I doubt the Shangrians told the Lanteans where they were.
I sead it once I will say it again THIS STRORY IS AWESOME
6269142 Clarke's law supports the point, actually. It's what the SGC mostly run on. There is no magic, only sufficiently advanced technology.
6268376 Now, don't take this as me saying I disagree with you, because I don't. The SGC is remarkably stubborn in saying there is no such thing as magic, but that's their quirk. They dismiss the idea of 'magic' as a primitive way of excusing what you don't understand. The psionics, the abilities, the super tech, all that is just science they don't fully understand. I think McKay came the closest to admitting that their may actually be magic when he said 'then I met the wraith that can suck our life our with their hands. What is that?', or something to that effect.
Equestria, on the other hand, treats magic as another science.
6269124 The simple answer: They don't know where it is. Gate Addresses above the seven symbol point lose the correlation to a real space position that the common ones have. It even seems as if transgalactic connections can only work from specific gates. Like the control tray the Atlantis gate has. The gate in Atlantis, the gate on earth, the gate on Orilla...
Now, another reason for the ship. Earth only has so many ships. It takes 18 or so days to reach the pegasus galaxy. The Concordia Galaxy is over 50% further away from the Milky Way.
As for the chair, it's a power hog. It's a well known power hog. And it still needs the power grid set up properly to work. They aren't exactly rushing to set up their new home, so they didn't have to use it yet.
Edit: by Atlantis they make the trip on a semi-regular basis, but it can stress the ship's life support and they tend to need the port of harbour Atlantis serves as. To stop for a while, stock up, let the support systems rest a little...
6269151 By this point... they would have.. four? The Daedalus, the Apollo, the Hammond and the Odyssey. They might have started salvaging the Sun Tzu by this point.
Because the ancients were so progressive and advanced thy only had teleporters, and little to no hallways and doors, so the inside of the city is hard closed off from outside?
Good thng these guards wernt shaky ttrigger fingers and on edge.
6269221
I don't think the show ever directly states that eight symbol gate addresses point to a specific place in space, but I would assume that is the case. But maybe the SGC hasn't yet figured out how to calculate the position from an address. But you'd think with years of experience with those addresses under their belt, years of experience studying the Stargates, and the Atlantis database at their disposal they would.
We know for sure the single known nine symbol "address" is actually a combination that always connects with Destiny regardless of position.
Apollo regularly makes the 18 day trip across the void between galaxies. 50% on top of that is nothing. Though for story purposes it can easily be further away, perhaps to the point where storing enough supplies for even a minimal crew on the ship becomes questionable.
Also with a ZPM the trip only takes 4 days, IIRC. That's a week or less to Concordia.
I should also add McKay mucks with the power grid USING the chair in Atlantis. But yeah, ZPM power is needed to use the chair (though there was one time we saw a Naquadah Generator Mark 2, but it was claimed to be very unstable, and we haven't seen it since so it was probably rectonned).
Interesting you say the ship's life support is stressed, I don't recall hearing that on the show. Is that Word of God? I do recall that when they overload the ship's recommended capacity with refugees (or at least talk about doing it) they mention it would put stress on the life support. But with a normal compliment I'm not sure how it would stress the life support since it's just operating normally. Unless you're saying the ship can't run in hyperspace or otherwise for extended periods, which again I don't recall being mentioned on the show, apart from when Prometheus MacGyvers a hyperdrive from a smaller ship.
EXTRA PREDICTION: When they get talking with Earth and report the findings of the aliens to Jack, Jack will slip "If wishes were horses" into the conversation appropriately somehow.
Addendum: If it seems like I'm nitpicking, it's only because I care. <3
Are you going to include the Tau'ri thing or are you just going to leave that out?
a better start then other cross overs I have read keep going you already have almost 400 likes
If Celestia is Cadences' aunt and Luna is Celestia's sister. Wouldn't Celestia and Luna be Cadences' aunts?
FINALLY! A good Stargate crossover...
Yes, you can haz favorite.
nifty idea
6269458 Cadence's backstory (in a book of some title I forget) says Celestia adopted her as a neice (sort of the same way Blueblood is her nephew, where he's descended from Princess Platinum).
6267907 Two things of note: First, if this story is more than three chapters long, then chapter two isn't your second act, its your second scene. There can be more than one scene (though not needed) for an act. But most stories have only three acts (unless you go with the false ending then there are four).
Second:
There are actually many mythologies that have winged horses in them. The Valkyries rode them in Norse, as did certain warriors in Persian, Japanese, and some other cultures (Hungarian) as well.
6269722 yeah, I realized that. The idea was that he was talking about Pegasus in particular in that line, the wording didn't quite work out. I'm considering rewording it. Considering.
6269722 Geez, and I read that one too.
I'd like to express my gratitude to the author for taking on a Sci-fi based crossover and utilizing the Slice of Life attitude of MLP in a unique way. Many such cross-overs have the day to day life of pony culture immediately clash with those being cross-overed, very few are those that make the attempt to have an honest melding of the cultures in question, or those involved just actively curious and exchanging information. The upbeat feel of MLP is here, while the somewhat jovial, yet always-expecting something to happen atmosphere of SG is right there to. Overall, an extremely well done blending of the two atmospheres of the shows in question.
On the side of a bit of constructive criticism, you do well in being straight to the point with character's emotions and letting us understand things in a crisp manner. However, there is a lack of exploration of deeper emotion when it comes to how the atmosphere of each situation is playing out, and of the character's thoughts. You don't have any clutter when it comes to emotion, or describing how the situation the characters are in is tense, light-hearted, nervous, etc, but you also don't venture to in-depth into the characters' thoughts or feelings on whats going on, just their surface emotions.
Your description of visuals is quite clean as well, I can get a feel of whats in the room without any tripping over over-flowery descriptions. Same with the characters themselves and how they look, and expressions, etc. I might suggest trying to add in other sensory input though, what does the air smell like in these ancient, untouched rooms? How heavy are the hoof-steps of the ponies? Etc.
All in all, I very much enjoy this, its clean, gets across what is needed to thoroughly understand what is going on, and does blend the atmosphere of both shows well. I look forwards to more!
6269930 one of writers here, thanks for the praise/criticism here. You have no idea how little I get of actual helpful criticism. My main stories are displaced stories and most comments are just praise... Which while nice, do not help one grow as a writer.
6269286 Better hope there's never a power failure!
6269458 Do you have a family friend who you call Aunt/Uncle even though they are of no relation? I assume it's like that.
But it is not established in the show either way, I think. Pretty sure her background story, plus how OLD Celestia is, preclude her from being an actual niece of Celestia.
Blueblood likewise is probably only a "nephew" in a similar sense, or because he can ultimately trace his bloodline back to her somehow, so it's more of a really-great-grand-nephew thing? Maybe Cadance can too?
6269151 The first episode featuring the Prometheus was in mid-season 6, which was one and a half seasons before Atlantis. The ship was incomplete, though functional, and after SG-1 used it to help the Asgard I assume they took it back to be finished.
IIRC the main thing about the Season 8 episode where they go to get Atlantis is that Prometheus was outfit with an Asgard hyperdrive. The hyperdrive shown in the first Prometheus episode was entirely human-made and apparently not very good (but the Goa'uld who jury rigged it to work it was biased I'm sure). So I remembered wrong, Prometheus did exist, it just was not capable of intergalactic travel at the time (well, Thor towed it into another galaxy or whatever but that doesn't count).
6270221 its been said Cadance is a distant relative of princess Amore
For the ships, with the access to the Asgard database along with the Atlantis one they may be working on a new generation of ships, but yeah, without massive ship yards like the G'ould apparently had Earth really can't churn out a fleet, or even new generation ships very quickly.
"maybe be deeper"
"may be deeper"?
"the isolated bases and expedition"
"expeditions"?
"There are tribes were their"
"where their"?
"He recognized the calculating look she thought she had hidden behind her expression. There was more to her than he had been told."
...So, changeling, Special Agent Sweetie Drops, or something else? :)
And I think now I've a large enough sample to justify a favourite. :)
6270096 As a writer, it is hard to edit one's own stories, let alone level in-depth critique at your own creations. We are as much blinded to our faults in our own works, as much as we search them out to try and become better writers. I crave true criticism of my work as much as I do the knowledge that others enjoy my works, I can improve my overall skill as a writer just by continuing to write, but it takes others to show me where my specific weaknesses and faults can be improved on. I just try to offer to other writers what i'd like to see in comments on my own works.