Ponyville confessions

by Lunaexcelsior

Bon Bon

So I am sitting there, tending bar, when in comes somepony I wasn’t expecting to see alone, Bon Bon.

Now Bon Bon is a fascinating mare who lived a really interesting life and she’s always got an interesting story to tell.

She’s usually very cheery and quite the blabbermouth if ya get what I mean and almost always comes with her friend, Lyra.

However, this time she seemed twitchier than ever before. She just kept tapping her hooves and glancing nervously at the door.

“So what’ll it be, ms Sweetiedrops?” I ask here.

She looks at me with crazy eyes and grabs my tie! Me bloody tie! Those things aren’t cheap ya know!

Then she starts asking me all sorts of questions like who do I work for and how do I know her secret name, which, if I am honest, isn’t really that big of a secret. Celestia posted the list of former spies a few weeks ago so most of Ponyville already knew who she was.

“Ms. Sweetiedrops, calm down”, I said, a bit afraid for my own life, “I was just asking ya what you want to drink?”

She takes another look at me and lets go of my tie. As I am straightening my tie, I notice how she is still on the edge.

“Peppermint schnapps”, she says, still nervously looking around.

As I’m pouring her drink, the bloody mare reaches over the counter and snatches the bottle right out of me hooves. She starts downing the entire thing like she is trying to win a race or something. And I am just standing there, wide eyed and in shock. I mean, it isn’t every day that this happens you know.

“Ahh that hit the spot”, she said as she finished off the bottle.

“Ms. Sweetiedrops are you feeling okay? You don’t seem to be yourself lately”, I said to her, trying to make heads or tail from this display.

“Actually, I am not”, she said groggily, “I am actually feeling mortified beyond my comprehension”. I could see that the bottle was beginning to fight back.

“So what’s the cause of your problems?” I asked.

“Well”, she began, “You know how I worked in Celestia’s secret service”.

“Yeah”, I replied.

“Well as it turns out there was a slight breach of perama-, parama- , paruna-“, she tried to think of the right words.

“Perimeter?” I interjected.

“Yeah, that thing”, she said groggily, “And as it turns out my vengeful ex man got out. Poof! Straight out of Tartarus and now he is looking for me”, she said, swaying heavily and flailing the empty bottle of schnapps around her head.

I took the bottle away from ‘er, because, frankly, I was afraid she would bust her head open with it or, even worse, my head.

“Well can’t you call the Royal Guard to stop him?” I asked.

“And how do you suppose they would stop a slime monster? Huh, smart guy?” she said pointing her hooves at me.

“You went out with a slime monster?!” I exclaimed in shock.

“What can I say?”, she shrugged, “I was really into bad boys back then”.

Suddenly, loud screams came from outside the bar.

“Wellp, looks like Jerry found me”, Bon bon said, leaving me the money for the bottle of schnapps, “See ya later, barskey!”

And with that she was off. Last I heard those two patched things up nicely and remained friends. Jerry’s a nice guy once ya get to meet him.

Sure he’s a ten foot blob demon who tried to destroy Ponyville in a jealous rage, but let’s be honest here; who hasn’t been there?

You see a lot of weird things as a bartender. You see a lot of weird things at the Hay Palace. So, I see a lot of weird things as a bartender at the Hay Palace. And that’s no lie. Swear on me mum.

Comments

[Titanium Blade]

Sure he’s a ten foot blob demon who tried to destroy Ponyville in a jealous rage, but let’s be honest here; who hasn’t been there?

I know that feel. Great chapter!