Celestia sipped on her tea with a thoughtful look on her face as I watched her, “...So almost everyone spends their free time watching these televisions which show them plays?”
I shook my head, “Well, not everyone and it's not all plays. There is the news, weather... educational shows.” and some very much less than educational shows, “But it is a rather popular pastime.”
“Sounds rather cultured.”
I couldn't help but snort sadly at that, “If you saw the quality of said so called 'plays', you would not think so, Princess. A lot of it focuses on the lowest common denominator... it's meant to be entertaining for as many people at once as possible. Which means that it is rather... simple in the terms of story telling and rather base in content.”
The Princess looked amused, “Fart jokes?” she suggested after a second and I almost choked on my tea.
“A-among other things.” I coughed, “L-let's just say that most of it sucks.”
“Sucks? Sucks what?”
Oh shit.
“Uhm... never mind, Your Highness.”
Bloody hell, I needed to watch what I said. While she was friendly and interested in what I was explaining, I DID NOT want to offend a creature able to hit me with a star. If clearly a rather small magical version.
“You don't need to fear me, my little pony.” Celestia said with a small frown, putting her cup down on the table, “Have I done something that causes you to?”
And she could apparently read minds.... or a better explanation, she was thousands of years old and had more practice reading bodylanguage than anyone alive.
I hesitated for a moment before I decided that the truth was the best idea, “It is not that I fear you. Princess. It's that I am... very unaccustomed to this entire thing. Waking up like this,” I motioned to myself with my right hoof, “Was a great shock. But it made some degree of sense... I still had four limbs, eyes, I could see, hear and talk. I could move. It existed within my frame of reference... if barely. Magic was different, but it still wasn't completely out there. Even if there is no actual magic in my world that I am aware of, we have tales and legends about it. I can accept magic. It's your ability to control the sun and moon that is terrifying.”
Celestia looked at me for a long moment before she slowly nodded, “I see why it could be. But my ability to raise the sun... you have nothing to fear from me, my little pony.”
“I have nothing to fear from a lot of things, Princess. That doesn't make the idea of them any less scary. Despite what I look like, I'm not really a pony in my head. I will get used to this, it will just take some time... and I would rather go home.”
She nodded again, “Of course. I have personally inspected the site of your arrival. I am sad to say that I have no idea how you ended up here like this. I am aware that there are other worlds, but there are so many. Even if we had a way of reliably sending you to one of them, there is no way of knowing which is yours.”
Fuck.
If not even an immortal sun goddess had any idea how to get me home.. what chance did I really have?
“Do not despair, Blank Page.” Celestia said, “You ended up here somehow. If that could happen, it is not impossible for you to be able to get back. I have experts in magical theory researching it as we speak.”
I nodded and took a drink of my tea, focusing on my telekinesis to lift it. It took enough focus that it helped to calm me down.
She was right, it wasn't hopeless. Somehow I ended up here. If it could happen this way, it could happen in reverse... unless it only worked from a magicless world to one filled with it.
But I couldn't think like that. I had to trust these... ponies... to be able to figure it out. G.. heh... Celestia knew that I would never manage it myself. I knew zip about magic.
“You are right.” I sighed before the door opened and a very dark blue mare walked inside, a head taller than me, her mane and tail light blue, but had a slight sparkly nature to them.
Luna. The other Princess. Ironically enough, despite her coloration and knowing that she used to be... well, evil...she looked less scary than Celestia. Maybe because she was smaller?
“Tia! Have you heard the so called music of this age! It is atrocious!”
I just stared at her for a long moment before Celestia cleared her throat, “Luna, we have a guest. This is Blank Page, you remember me telling you about him?”
The dark moon goddess blinked in surprise as she suddenly spotted me, her volume rising a couple of hundred decibels, “Oh. Greetings, We apologize for not noticing thy presence.”
“I... suppose that's okay.” I finally managed to answer, “This is your home, Princess. I'm just a guest.”
Princess Luna walked up and sat down by the table next to her sister, pouring herself a cup of tea before filling the rest of the cup with sugar cubes.
Seriously, if it cooled, her tea would have the consistency of syrup.
“We have heard your story, Blank Page. It is a fascinating, if sad one.” Luna said after taking a sip of her tea and adding more sugar, “But We have yet to hear what your profession was before you arrived in Equestria.”
How in the world would I explain network technician?
“Uhm...” I answered after a moment's thought, “We have... machines that think of sorts, calculating things for us. I'm trained in maintaining the other machines they use to talk to each other. But I was apprentice level at best, not a true expert.”
“I see.” Celestia said with a thoughtful look, “This was your special talent?”
I shook my head, “Humans don't have those, not like ponies anyway. There may be things we are good at or enjoy, but anyone can become as good at anything with enough work. As for network repair... no I don't think so. I loved to write though.”
Luna's ears perked up, “Stories?” her volume going down to something a bit more normal.
Nodding I turned to look up at her, “Mostly, yes. I... was not that good at that either in my opinion, I just loved writing them.”
“Tell us a story from your world.” Luna commanded and laid down on the large pillow she had been sitting on.
Hmm. Yeah... I guess? But what to pick? Something classic...
Taking another sip I finished my cup of tea before refilling it, “A long long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away...”
Trollestia and star wars, I lkie
MY GOD WHAT HAVE YOU DONE
Ah, Starwars; a definite classic!
Of all ponies Princess Luna was the last I'd think of as having a taste for tea akin to that of Compo. R Last of the Summer Wine
Fuck you. Why e'en Star Wars? You could have picked anything else, anything to make your character not seem like an average joe...Why?
And the plot twist is...
Blank Page began telling the Princesses about the Robot Chicken parodies of Star Wars, not Star Wars itself.
Nice. thought I actually would have gone with something a bit more fantasy like... like Legend of Zelda.
Dum dum dum Du, du dum, Du, du dum.
Hell yeah Star Wars!
My reaction to you suddenly going there:
I LOVE YOU MAN STAR WARS RULES!!!!
Do the darth Vader theme. Please?
6756727 Better?
A: [youtube=_D0ZQPqeJkk]
B: are we starting off at "a new hope" or "the phantom menace"?
6818343 or maybe "a new hope 2.0" :P
ohhhh hell yes....wait is it robot chicken?
You just had to go with that...
Of course. Star Wars. You couldn't have picked Forest Gump, or Jurrasic Park, or Indiana Jones, or HARRY POTTER. So many options, but everyone chooses Star Wars. Granted, awesome series (minus the last two prequals), but it's always Star Wars.
What I want to know, besides why everyone choses Star Wars, is HOW anyone could verbally express that story to beings who's height of technology is the steam powered train... Now if someone had a laptop with them, and a solar charger, and had the movies on the computer... That'd most likely blow their pony minds. :P
6825869 I, for one, don't actually mind that J.J. Abrams basically remade ANH, because not only did he do it well, but the story line is a wonderful one. There was next-to-nothing wrong with the story for ANH (nothing's perfect, but some are just made better than others - looking at you, Santa Claus vs. The Martians), and copying it is perfectly fine.
Look at it this way - he could have copied Phantom Menace, instead......
6756727 Try this one:
6389117 Since I started reading FimFiction i have not once seen anyone refer to Last Of The Summer Wine, heck the only people i ever really talk about that show with are my parents. For the mere fact you mentioned the show (and Compo) i respect you.
A man after my own heart! He gets all my love for that last line.
Ah! The epic tale of Star Wars. We shall begin with Episode 4.
7281147 And we shall never speak of one, two, or three!
7357661
If there is one thing you must never be
It is one who speaks of One, Two, Three.
Those who do, wish to be free
Of their fate, stuck in a tree.
(&¡&)
/ \ ¡¥¡¥¡¥¡¥¡¥¡¥
(Tried to make it look like torches and pitchforks, but it's not great.)
Ah my god, I can't believe there was a lightsaber ad at the end.
You, Ma'am, have earned my respect a thousand-fold.
[youtube=https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=hEcjgJSqSRU]
7408465
3.bp.blogspot.com/-2BbDk543PZs/T2Z3EO_cNDI/AAAAAAAAA1I/EHOpkaB6L6U/s1600/excuse-me-what-is-this.gif
More like,
Better?
7658850 much
oh, i just remembered: in the movie, "reign of fire", where Dragons have conquered the world, there's a scene where the hero does a stage-play version of "the empire strikes back"to entertain some kids!
Personally, I prefer the order to be 4,5,1,2,3,6 as I think that a new hope was the better opener, and that the second trilogy could be told as a tale to Luke by the spirit of Obi-Wan, and how it would galvanize Luke into thinking that he could save his father. still a good story to end on though, I look forward to reading the rest.
7887098
Ah yes, a great scene indeed.
WE DOST DECLARE THIS STORY BE ADDED TO OUR TOP PRIORITY FOLDER!!!!!!!!!!!!!
7887098 Dressed in gold armor, making perfect sound effects, and in a foreign language, by chance? Nootch Vader indeed.
7934365 that's how I recommend people to see the movies as well, but that description as to why was nothing short of beautiful.
Oh my god I'm dying of laughter
When he wrote the intro for Star wars I was like...
I thought he was gonna go for a short and easy story, but he goes for Star Wars. That's fucking crazy! They're going to be sitting there for the next two hours listening to that story.
8417981
I definitely agree with you but I have something to add, WHY IS IT ALWAYS STAR WARS!?! Of all the HIE stories I read that has a human telling ponies a story the first time, it is rarely NOT star wars. WHY!?!
8529742
Because it’s the most well known. Even Harry Potter isn’t as well known. Plus, telling a story of magic to a race capable of more advanced magic? Star Wars is the logical choice. It’s Sci-Fi, which is something new to them, it’s well-known, it has an easy plot.
Star wars? Why not trek or battle star even babalon 5
8777990 because star wars plot is simple and easy to explain since its just the generic heroes journey in space compared to babylon 5 and star trek
Of all the excuses why an HiE protagonist can't go home, "the multiverse is frikin huge" is probably one of the easiest, yet most believable.
Think about it, even if they could find Blank's home universe among the possibly infinite possibilities, they'd stil have to find Earth. And if they could do that, they'd still have to make sure he didn't end up in the middle of the ocean. And if they could do THAT they'd have to make sure the land he did get transported to wasn't an environment likely to kill him.
Well, my explanation of televisions would've gone a bit differently. Until I vot to a certain part.
Me:Ok, tvs......well, first things first, do you have cameras here princess?
P.C.: Why yes, we have just recently developed that technology.
Me:
Me:anyways, think of a camera that can take hundreds of photos insanely fast. *proceeds to explain how the first movies came about**then proceeds to explain the advancement in voice recording technology*
The story start at the very end make me laugth Still grinning like mad wile typing it
6392111
Cause Luna's mane. That's why.
What Star Wars story is he going to talk about? The force awakens?, A New Hope?, Or Return of the Jedi?
Personally I would avoid stories where an analog to Nazi’s exist for a first introduction story. I’d have gone with a fairy tale or other moral parable.
9947482
I gave that same exact advice to another author several years ago. It was a story about an archaeologist who got sucked into Equestria. Stayed human, though. My caution against telling Fluttershy a story about a war spanning thousands of planets at the same time actually made the author rethink the whole thing. Not sure the same warning applies to the Princesses, who depending on the author can have quite a checkered past. But something to be careful about, just the same.
Really?