A Search for Something More

by HAKDurbin

Chapter 46: Letters

The Sunday after the party, I mostly stayed at home, spending the day doing homework and otherwise hanging out in my room with the events of that night firm in my mind. I haven't heard a call nor text from Sunset or the others throughout the day, but I didn't mind because I figure everyone had stuff to do and was probably still worn out from the party.

The next day, my mom drops me off at the school parking lot and tells me to have a good day like always. I walk over to the front entrance to meet Soarin and Caramel for our first class. When I see them, they are both talking to each other with Caramel looking away from Soarin with a blissful look.

"Hey fellas," I greet. "Whatcha talking about?"

"Oh, just how things have been going with Caramel and AJ," Soarin answers smirking. "They spent the day together yesterday, and it was the best day ever. Right, Caramel?"

"Her lips taste like apples," Caramel says dreamily. "Each kiss we share is better than the last."

Soarin and I look at each other and smirk over our friend's demeanor before I change the subject.

"Hey, Caramel, have you thought about what you and Applejack are going to do once we all graduate."

Caramel snaps out of his blissful state and turns to us, smiling.

"Oh, we've talked about that already actually," he says. "Applejack and Sonata are going to stay and keep working on the farm after graduation. Applejack always wanted to continue the family business, and Sonata wants to stay living with her new family."

"And what about you?" Soarin asks.

"I've been thinking about a community college not far from here," Caramel answers. "I don't know what I want to do for a living yet, so my parents suggested that I take a bunch of general ed to figure it out while staying at home where I can continue my new relationship with AJ."

"Sounds great, man," I say before turning to Soarin. "What about you?"

"Rainbow and I have already applied and got accepted to Cloudsdale University," Soarin answers. "We both have sports scholarships to go there. What about you, Rough Draft? Shouldn't you have been looking at some colleges by now?"

I scratch the back of my head and chuckle nervously.

"Honestly, I haven't been looking at all," I answer reluctantly. "I guess I've been so occupied with spending as much of my free time with Sunset as I can when I'm not getting captured and shot that I haven't thought about it."

"You better get on that, man," Caramel says worryingly. "There's not going to be much time left to apply, and we only have a few weeks left until we graduate."

"I know," I say. "I guess I should look into that with Sunset. I want to go to a college that's affordable and has a good writing program, and I imagine Sunset would want to go wherever I go."

"Maybe," Soarin says before the bell rings, announcing we have five minutes until our first class starts. "Why don't you bring it up with her during lunch or something?"

"Yeah, good idea," I say as I follow Soarin and Caramel inside the school to start the day.

*************************************************************************************************

When the bell rings announcing that fifth-period is over and it is time for lunch, I grab my stuff, race out of my class, and head to the cafeteria. My mind is curious as to what Sunset will say about college, while at the same time, I'm just excited to see her again, wearing her rose necklace. I feel a blush on my cheeks as I remember the deep kiss she gave me after I helped her put it on.

Suddenly, I feel my phone vibrating, and I open it to find a group text containing Applejack, Rainbow Dash, Soarin, Caramel, Twilight, Fluttershy, Rarity, and Pinkie Pie.

Applejack: Hey, Y'all, could we meet in the music room for lunch?

Soarin: Sure, but why?

Rainbow Dash: Please tell me we aren't practicing during lunch. I'm kinda starving, AJ.

Applejack: It's important.

Me: I don't see Sunset in our text group, does she know about this?

Applejack: Just come. I'll explain there.

I frown, concerned with Applejack's response before I reluctantly obey and start walking to the music room. When we enter the room, everyone but Sunset is there, sitting on the benches while Applejack and Sonata stand in the middle with crestfallen looks on their faces.

"Hey, Rough Draft," Applejack says sadly. "You better sit down."

"What's going on?" I ask as I reluctantly obey, sitting next to Caramel and Soarin. Applejack and Sonata look at each other sadly before Applejack begins.

"This morning, I had a little talk with Sunset before class started," Applejack says. "She came to Sonata and me to tell us that..." she bites her lip before she continues. "That she went back to Equestria to stay."

I don't move a muscle at this news. Confusion and shock fill my mind while I feel my heart slowly break at this news.

"What? What are you talking about?" Rainbow Dash demands.

"I mean, she already had her stuff packed from her apartment save for her furniture and went into the portal, and she's going to stay in Equestria for good."

"But...but why would she do that?" Rarity chokes as her eyes already begin to water.

"She says she had to stay away to protect us," Applejack says. "I tried to reason with her, but she feels that after the whole thing with Adagio and Aria, she thinks that she's a danger to all of us, and by leaving, we will be protected from any future magical problems."

"And you let her?!" I snap.

"We couldn't stop her Rough Draft," Sonata says, crying. "We tried to change her mind but didn't budge. She made us agree to give you guys these letters -"

"Letters? We're supposed to be okay that our friend just up and left with letters?" Rainbow Dash asks angrily.

"She wanted them to be her way of saying goodbye and explaining her choice to all of us," Applejack says as she takes out a handful of envelopes from her backpack. "These are meant for each of us."

Before she can continue, I stand up and snatch the letters from her. I search through them until I find one that has my name and give the rest back to Applejack, not looking at her or Sonata. I rip the envelope open and take a piece of paper out that appears to have teardrops on it as I dare read the letter.

Dear Rough Draft,

By the time you are reading this, I'll already be long gone. You were willing to make a sacrifice to protect me and everyone we care about, and now it's my turn. I have decided for your protection and the protection of our friends to return to Equestria permanently. Understand that I wouldn't do this unless it was absolutely necessary. It breaks my heart even now to do this to anyone, least of all you, but the fact is what happened with Adagio and Aria proves that you are becoming a target because I brought magic into your world, and I think it's better that you find out now after having one last night together than to stand outside your door just to say goodbye to you. I know you'd try to convince me that this isn't the way, but no matter what you say, I don't deserve to be with you if you are always in danger because of my actions. I'll forever treasure our love more than I can put into words, but I would rather we be apart where you will be safe then to stay and one day lose you because of what I've done. You should be free of this burden, free to carry out your life without magic. I know you will be angry with me, and I hate myself for doing this to you, but I have to do what's right for everyone. Whatever happens, remember that you have our friends with you. Please don't push them away like you did when Octavia broke up with you. You will need them to move on and live the life you deserve, and I will stay in Equestria where I will know you are safe and keep my necklace with me always remembering every moment we've had. No matter what happens, remember that I will always love you until my dying day, and I hope that one day you will forgive me.

Love now and always,

Sunset Shimmer (Sunshine)

My heart breaks bit by bit with every word. Anything she says in the letter about cherishing our love is numbed by the pain that she left me. I turn to the others, and their reactions from reading their letters tell me everything. Rarity is tearing up so much that she's ruining her makeup. Pinkie Pie's hair deflated a little as she stares at her letter. Rainbow Dash is trying hard not to cry while Soarin rubs his girlfriend's back, trying to comfort her. Twilight looks at her letter, broken and confused that her mentor just left. Even Fluttershy is trying hard not to whimper out a cry as she hides under her hair. Sonata, while not having a letter on her own, is starting to cry while Applejack hugs her future adopted sister while trying to fight her tears.

Caramel, who just finished reading his letter, looks up to me sadly.

"Rough Draft..." He begins, struggling to say anything else to me.

At that moment, I've had enough. I turn around and burst through the doors of the music room. I hear everyone calling out to me, but I don't care. I race through the halls and exit through the entrance doors until I stop to see the remains of the Wondercolt statue. I stare at the location of the portal to Equestria with a determined look. If I can't make her see that's she's wrong in this world, I'll go to Equestria and find her no matter what it takes. I run across the courtyard, my target dead on my sights. I'm prepared to go through that portal and become a pony and find the love of my life. Nothing else matters but to get her back.

But instead of going through the portal, my head collides with solid rock.

I fall to the ground and rub my head in pain before I lift my head, looking at the statue again. I start touching where the portal should me only find out in shock that my hands are feeling nothing but stone. I shake my head in disbelief as it hits me that Sunset closed the portal between our worlds.

"No," I say quietly before I start pounding on the stone, yelling angrily. "NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO!"

I keep banging on the stone, ignoring the pain from my right arm because of the sudden movements. Eventually, my hits become weaker and weaker, and my anger turns into grief as I slowly get down on my knees and start to cry.

"Rough Draft!" I hear Sonata calling out, and she and the others run to my side. She kneels next to me worryingly as I turn to her, my eyes already red from crying.

"T-the portal is gone," I manage to say. "S-she closed it."

Sonata doesn't waste another second to wrap her arms around me tightly, and I cry on her shoulder. She tries to fight her tears that are still coming as Applejack, Caramel, Rainbow Dash, Soarin, Fluttershy, Rarity, Pinkie Pie, and Twilight huddle around us and we all weep bitterly together.

************************************************************************************************

Neither of us feel like paying attention to any of our classes for the rest of the day. I didn't even bother trying in my seventh-period class because I had my eye glued to Sunset's empty seat, staring at it bitterly. When school ends for the day, Applejack, Sonata, Caramel, and Soarin offer to walk home with me, and I nod nonchalantly, not even looking at them. None of us ever say a word through the entire walk. We all know how we feel, and there are no words to try to comfort each other.

When we reach my house, Applejack decides to take the initiative and puts her hand on my shoulder.

"Listen Rough Draft, I know you feel pretty bitter about what Sunset just did, but she asked us in our letters to make sure you don't shut us out like you with Octavia Melody," Applejack says.

"Oh, did she? How thoughtful of her," I say coldly.

"Hey now, don't go off acting like that," she says sternly. "She only did what she thought was the best thing for all of -"

"So now you're defending her?" I snap. "You're defending the fact that she just left all of us just like that?"

"Rough Draft, she's not saying what Sunset did was right or anything like that," Caramel says.

"I know what she's saying," I say bitterly. "She thinks by trying to comfort me I'm still going to be this happy person that Sunset wants me to be. Well, tough luck, guys, because it doesn't work that way. There's only so much you guys can do to numb the fact that the girl I love just up and left me practically out of nowhere, and she is never coming back. She doesn't try to compromise on what happened or trust that she will be able to handle things together with me or any of you, she just leaves and tries to soften the blow with one party and a letter. What was I even thinking, buying some necklace for her when she's going to break my heart again? The girl who spent so much time trying to mend my heart just ripped it to pieces claiming that she's doing the right thing by leaving me again. You guys can try to comfort me all you want, but you can't mend my heart from this. And if that's the way it is, then you guys shouldn't even bother!"

Without giving anyone a chance to say anything back, I run to my house, ignoring Applejack, Sonata, Caramel, and Soarin's words of protest. I enter the house, storm up the stairs, enter my room, slam the door, and plop into my bed. New tears start to fall as I lay there, hugging myself.

Then I notice my locket still hanging around my neck. I give it one last look before I yank it off and throw it to the other side of the room. I turn my body to face the wall as tears continue to fall down my face.

Sunset Shimmer, wherever you are, I wish there is some way you can hear me and know that you have carelessly crushed whatever hopes I had left.

I will never forgive you. Ever.

****************************************************************************************

3rd person P.O.V.

Derpy hears nothing but silence as she enters Vinyl's house and makes her way to the basement. Halfway down the steps, she starts to wonder if anyone is there at all until she hears the annoyed sigh of her beloved boyfriend coming from the basement's main room. She frowns as she enters the room to find Doc sitting down and staring at the radar again, clearly trying to figure out something that has been bugging him for the last two days. Derpy looks down on the ground sadly before she forces a smile on her face, walks up to Doc from behind and gives him a soft kiss on the cheek that snaps him out of his trance.

"Hello, dear," Doc says quietly as he turns his head to his girlfriend and gives her a small smile before he stares back at the machine.

"Doc, have you been staring at that thing all day again?" Derpy asks worryingly.

"No, just looking at recordings to see if there have been any changes while we were all at school," Doc says reassuringly while his face is still focused on the radar.

Derpy frowns at this answer.

"You know I worry about how far you take monitoring that unknown twelfth person with magic," she says.

Doc sighs again and turns to his girlfriend.

"I can't help it, Derpy," he says. "This unknown person, this...thing is an enigma that I can't seem to figure out. It just pops up in random locations all over the Canterlot-Crystal City area, and there doesn't seem to be any concrete reason why. The only clue we have is that it was at Bon Bon's house the other night with Applejack and Sunset Shimmer, but as soon as Vinyl and I came to the house, Lyra, Bon Bon, and Mrs. Drops had no memory of what they had been doing or if anyone else was there with them prior. Did something happen between Lyra, Bon Bon, Mrs. Drops, Applejack, and Sunset Shimmer, and this twelfth person just forced them to forget with magic or something? Do Rough Draft, Soarin, Caramel, or any of the Rainbooms know they were there that night? Does any of it explain why Sunset Shimmer suddenly left our world? It makes no sense."

"You already heard about Sunset Shimmer going back to Equestria?" Derpy asks.

"Yeah, Vinyl told me when I got here," Doc says before he nods his head to the recording room. "She's been hiding there, trying to figure out how Sunset Shimmer leaving is part of some evil plot or something or other. I'm a little concerned about her, to be honest."

"I'm more worried about Rough Draft," Derpy says sadly. "I hear he's started shunning himself from his friends because he's so brokenhearted and bitter for Sunset Shimmer leaving him. What's worse is knowing that this is how he acted when he learned that Octavia was dating Treble Clef: nothing more than a hallow version of himself."

Doc frowns and says, "I don't blame the poor lad. I meant what I said at the hospital. I would be acting the same if I ever lost you as abruptly as he has lost both of his girlfriends."

Derpy gives Doc a sad smile before she gives him a side hug and lays her chin on top of his head.

"That will never happen to you, cuddle muffin. That's a promise," she says as Doc Wraps his arms around her waist, still sitting down. "All the same, I'm worried that he's not going to be the same after two breakups like that."

"Yeah, it's probably not going to be pretty to see him brokenhearted during the hearing," Doc says.

"Yeah," Derpy says glumly. "We still need to create a well-detailed story for what we were doing there to keep the police unaware of our weapons or the magic, don't we?"

"Yes, we do," Doc says. "No doubt the Rainbooms will probably be there to support Rough Draft. That'll be unpleasant now that they know how we can fight magic, according to Tavi."

Derpy frowns at the mention of Octavia.

"Speaking of her," she begins. "Does Sunset Shimmer leaving Rough Draft mean Octavia has a chance to get back together with him?"

"Not yet."

Derpy and Doc turn around to see Octavia entering the room with a crestfallen face.

"Not yet? What do you mean not yet, Tavi?" Derpy asks. "This means you have your chance to get back together with your darling."

"No, it doesn't," Octavia says sadly. "Sunset Shimmer told me what Rough Draft went through when I dumped him. How do you think he's feeling right now after she just left him without a word? More than likely, a sudden appearance from me is not something Rough Draft needs right now."

"But if not now, then when?" Doc asks. "You don't want to wait too long to try to pick up the pieces of his heart."

"I know," Octavia says. "But I need to be careful about how and when I approach him. More than likely, he'll be bitter enough because of my actions that lead to his relationship with Sunset Shimmer. I need to find the right time to approach him and attempt to help him move on from her and get him back."

"That might be a difficult thing to do, Tavi," Doc says sympathetically. "You might never get the chance to get back together with him no matter how you time things."

"I know," Octavia admits sadly. "But I choose to believe there's a chance. Things between us were never easy, but the fact that we found love despite that is part of what made our relationship so wonderful. I know it's going to be hard, but I will give it my all. I have to for both of us."

Derpy and Doc look at each other, concerned with their friend's words.

"Well, we'll have your back no matter what, Tavi," Doc says. "And we're gonna do everything we can to make things right between Rough Draft and us when we get a chance to do so too."

"I appreciate that Doc," Octavia says with a small smile. "By the way, where is Vinyl?"

"She's in the recording room," Doc says.

Octavia gives him an appreciative nod and walks to the recording room. She slowly opens the door to hear a low beat echoing the room as Vinyl is glumly sitting in front of the soundboard. Octavia finds a chair and brings it next to Vinyl to sit next to her. Nothing is said for a minute as Vinyl keeps her eyes focused on the soundboard.

"So you heard about Sunset Shimmer, huh?" Vinyl asks, still not looking at her friend.

"I did," Octavia answers plainly.

"How do you feel about that?" Vinyl asks.

Octavia looks at her best friend, skeptically.

"How are you feeling about that?" She asks. "You look like you're taking it about as hard as Rough Draft is."

"That's because I am," Vinyl answers.

"Why?" Octavia asks. "Are you worried about how it might connect to what might or might not have happened at Bon Bon's house?"

Vinyl doesn't say anything at first, but then she turns off the soundboard, ending the music before she turned to Octavia.

"Yes and no," Vinyl says.

Octavia stares at Vinyl, waiting for her to say more. It takes a moment before Vinyl hangs her head and sighs heavily.

"I miss how everything used to be, Tavi," Vinyl says. "I miss how things were before we made the E.M.R. I miss how we were all just friends who were just spending time together, doing everything we could to make you happy after you lost your cello teacher and had all that crap going on with Blueblood. Even when Sunset Shimmer ruled the school, we still had each other. That's all we had and all we wanted as we started our senior year, and you had just moved in. I was still friends with the Rainbooms, playing some music whenever Rainbow Dash scored a goal during a game or whenever I was asked to play at one of Pinkie Pie's parties. It feels like except for you hooking up with Rough Draft, things have been going downhill for us as a group ever since we decided to call ourselves the E.M.R.."

"How can you say that, Vinyl?" Octavia asks angrily. "If it weren't for us, Sonata would still be on the run, forced to follow her so-called sisters, and we wouldn't have been able to save Rough Draft from those same ex-sirens."

"But at what cost?" Vinyl asks. "When we're not capturing sirens, we're stealing magic and wrongfully accusing some of our friends of distrust, whether it's the Rainbooms or Rough Draft. Now, something happened between two of our friends and two Rainbooms, and they don't remember anything that happened. So we have a group of former friends who rightfully hate us for doing something that gave us a chance to fight magic, there's something out there with magic that might have something to do with Sunset Shimmer leaving, and thanks to me you lost Rough Draft. Yes, we saved Sonata and Rough Draft's lives, but I feel like we're causing more harm than good as a team. Or at least I am."

Vinyl hangs her head in shame as Octavia looks at her friend sympathetically.

"We don't know that whatever happened at Bon Bon's has something to do with Sunset Shimmer leaving," Octavia says kindly.

Vinyl gives Octavia an unamused look.

"Tavi, I appreciate that you're trying to help, but did Sunset Shimmer sound like she was going to abruptly leave Rough Draft in any way when you had your little verbal match with her?" she asks.

Octavia hesitates before she admits, "No. She made it clear that she had no intention of letting Rough Draft out of her sight."

"Then whatever happened at Bon Bon's house that might have made her leave him has to be something Equestrian in nature that's behind all of this," Vinyl says. "Whoever is number twelve, probably wanted her out of the way for some evil magic plan. I have no idea what it is or if we can be prepared for it with just the six of us."

"What are you saying, Vinyl?" Octavia asks.

Vinyl sighs again and looks at Octavia seriously.

"I think we need to expand as a group," Vinyl says.

"What?" Octavia asks, surprised.

"You heard me," Vinyl answers.

"But you just said that you regret making the E.M.R. because we're causing more harm than good," Octavia says.

"I know what I said, Tavi," Vinyl says. "But think about it. This twelfth person with magic might be involved in Sunset Shimmer leaving our world. Why?"

Octavia hesitates before she thinks about it.

"I suppose because she's the only real threat against anyone with dark magic since she's responsible for the Rainbooms defeating the Dazzlings and stopping our world's Twilight from destroying both our world and Equestria," she says.

"Exactly," Vinyl says. "Sunset Shimmer has been the key to stopping anyone who wants the magic dwelling in CHS. We may still have the other Rainbooms, but she was the one who was figuring things out because she's the only person in our school who truly knows about magic in general apart from the Twilight from her world. With her leaving and closing the portal in the process, the Rainbooms are leaderless and thus are unable to help while we have another magical encounter like Adagio and Aria, or Human Twilight, or worse. Heck, for all we know, they might be responsible for Adagio and Aria suddenly having magic. We don't know, and from the sound of things, neither do the Rainbooms. This unknown person might be more powerful than anything CHS has come up against, and if they were in league with Adagio and Aria, then they might be out for blood. We need to unite as a school to prepare for what's out there, and if the Rainbooms are unable to do it with their leader gone, then we must step up and do it ourselves. The lives of everyone at our school at best may depend on it."

Octavia frowns.

"Vinyl, are you sure this is the next logical step for us?" She asks worryingly.

Vinyl sighs and gives her best friend a fearful look.

"Adagio and Aria almost murdered someone, Octavia. They almost killed Rough Draft in cold blood without any remorse," Vinyl says. "If this twelfth person with magic is in league with them in any way, what do you think the odds are that they won't have the same agenda? That they will kill anyone who gets in their way? Can you tell me that there isn't the slightest chance that Rough Draft getting shot might be the first of many horrible things to come if we don't at least try to do something?"

"But what about the Rainbooms?" Octavia asks. "Are you sure we can't discuss this with them?"

"Tavi, you said Sunset Shimmer said that things are officially screwed up between the Rainbooms and us," Vinyl says. "Do you think they're gonna want to listen to us now, especially with their best friend gone?"

"Why not?" Octavia challenges. "If this unknown person with magic is as terrible as you're theorizing, we'll need the Rainbooms' help with or without Sunset Shimmer."

"Then feel free to try that, Tavi," Vinyl says. "You'll probably have to talk to them anyway when you start trying to get back together with Rough Draft, so you might as well try to bring this up with them."

Octavia is taken aback at Vinyl's response before she frowns and says, "Fine, then I will. Someone has to try to mend things between our groups, and if you're too scared to do it, then I will."

Vinyl looks away, defeated.

"Then do it, Octavia," she says before giving Octavia another serious look. "But if they don't want to listen, don't say I didn't tell you so. More importantly, if you at least get a chance to gain their help to try to start mending things between you and Rough Draft, do not hesitate to take it."

Octavia doesn't say anything right away for a couple of seconds.

"Not that I’m against the idea, but is my relationship really a priority next to possible doom?" she asks.

"It is to me," Vinyl says. "If we lose the fight to come, I want you to give it your all to make sure to face defeat with Rough Draft knowing that you still love each other."

Octavia hesitates before she sighs and accepts that Vinyl's right. Deep down in her heart, she wants to mend things with Rough Draft and be by his side no matter what happens.

"I understand," she says quietly.

"Good," Vinyl says. "Then you better get ready to approach him. There's no telling how much time we have left."

Octavia winces before she reluctantly obeys. She stands up and leaves the sound booth, but not before giving Vinyl another sad look. She doesn't bother to say bye to Doc and Derpy, who are buried in their conversation, but goes up the stairs, walks across the hall, and exits the house.

She stops walking on the front porch as she notices that it's night time, and the moon is shining brightly. The sight of the moon aches her heart as it makes her think of her big date with Rough Draft over at Crystal City. A tear falls down her face as the thought brings her back into thinking how much pain poor Rough Draft is in emotionally. She uncuffs her bow tie, takes out her sapphire necklace, and stares at it sadly.

"Oh darling, I wish I knew what could have compelled Sunset Shimmer to break your heart again," she says. "You don't deserve anything she or I have done to you. I promise I will do everything in my power to put it back together again and protect it from ever being broken again. I will wait until you've had enough time to grieve, Rough Draft, and then as heaven is my witness, you will never shed a tear again."

With those words, Octavia kisses the jewel, puts it back under her shirt, and with determination in her eyes, she marches home, ready to wait for the right moment to approach the nerdy boy she loves.

End of part two.

Comments

[Tunefulsubset72]

Still not happy with vinyl, now she wants to use him

As Vegeta once said

I'LL KILL 'EM

[CSC]

Holly shit!!!

Okay NOW I'm freaking out here. Great job!!

[justcallmegreg]

With all that has transpire, Octavia mending the riff between her and Rough Draft, perhaps. The idea that Octavia could rekindle her relationship with Rough Draft as it were, most defiantly no