“Nothing is so painful to the human mind as a great and sudden change.”
― Mary Shelley, Frankenstein
I knew something was weird when I felt a tongue frantically licking my face.
You think that would be sexy, but no. I was too tired for this nonsense. I slept terribly, like usual. Groaning, I attempted to roll over in my ugly, orange sleeping bag where the soft padding of paws shifted over to my new direction and resumed its licking.
“Bleh, Yuri, no,” I sputtered, waving my arm up to shoo away my dog. Instead of the usual waving, my arm bent… oddly. It felt like my elbow was smashed hard against the side of my torso and my hand felt… long. Too long. And my voice! It had a weird, buzzing reverb quality to it. This got me to crack open my eyes. If this was a dream, it’s the most realistic one I’ve ever had. Attempting to rub the sleep out of my tired scratchy eyes only resulted in me hitting myself in the face with what felt to be a very hard blunt object.
When I could see again, all I could really do was look down and stare. Instead of my normal human arm, I saw a goddamn stub. It was blackish orange and covered in what appeared to be hard armor, which ended in a horse-like hoof. Looking at my left arm/foreleg resulted in the same thing. Yuri, my service dog, just sat as close as he could to me in my tent and tried once again to lick my face. Looking down showed other more drastic changes. I did the most rational and logical thing any human being could do.
I threw up.
Changing species in one night does not do a body good as I have come to have found out. I laid in the cleanest part of my tent and cried. I just cried while I was curled up in a ball with my new weird legs and torso. My pants have fallen off and my now oversized shirt was squishing something on my back. Faithful Yuri just simply laid with me and placed his great, big, fluffy head on my shoulder and made soft little noises as he attempted to comfort me. It helped, I can tell you that much. When he started making silly ‘omnom’ noises I couldn’t help but to crack a smile again. So I just laid with him for a while, giggling as he took the opportunity to stick his wet nose into my surprisingly still ticklish spots. It did calm me down enough where I could take a little closer look at myself. Yuri simply stayed where he was, licking and nibbling on me as he gave me much needed emotional support.
The first things I looked at were my arms. They looked like the front legs of some animal. Bending the ‘wrist’ portion made it seem like it came from a type of ungulate or equine, especially since the blunt ends sorta looked like hooves. They sure resembled them, with a frog and everything. Looking at the bottom of my hooves revealed tiny stiff hairs inside of the hollows and tiny cracks in the ‘armor’ where my joints are. There’s something sharp on my head, ‘cause I poked a big hole in the tent in my thrashing. This was some Gregor Samsa level of horror right here and I don’t even know what my face looks like yet.
Eventually, the haze of despair and abject terror faded enough for me to have some semblance of thought again. It’s when I noticed… nothing. There were no noises outside. Was anyone awake? None of the other hikers were coming in to check on me as I panicked. Sure, I've done this before, so maybe they got used to Yuri taking care of me and didn't want to bother me while I'm vulnerable and screaming? There were three other people in my hiking party, surely one of them would have dropped by. Wouldn’t my yelling have woken somebody up?
Wait.
What if… what if they have changed too? Maybe they are afraid to come out? Perhaps they were like me now—
a horrible bug monster, trapped in your clothing and having a severe existential crisis. Perhaps so.
This revelation sobered me up for a bit. I just lay quietly and recovered while I was still tangled in my sleeping bag as patient Yuri licked away the tears from my new face. At that moment, I was completely grateful that at least Yuri knew who I was. Did my scent stay the same after I changed, or did he witness my horrifying transformation first hand? That poor dog.
I'm getting off track, I need to get UP.
It was harder than it seemed. I guess now I'm a full on quadruped. I've seen horses and cows walk before, but doing it yourself is much harder. There's a pattern you have to get down and, lucky me, I'm not so good at those. The first few attempts caused me to end up on my face. Thankfully, whatever my new 'skin' was made of prevented serious injury, but, eventually, I could stand and walk a bit. I felt like a wobbly toddler as I figured out this mess of limbs. Like I was actually walking on what would essentially be my toe and fingernails. It's… weird. There’s a strange sensation of touch on my hooves. I can feel the hard little pebbles under my canvas tent. I could even feel the lingering body heat on the floor fading. Weird.
Getting out of the tent was another problem as it was zipped tight. Luckily for me, there was a rope tied to the zipper for Yuri to grab and open it himself. I was so glad I put it there at the start of my journey. Paranoia paid off!
Yuri is a great service dog. I have no clue where I would be without him looking out for me.
“Hello!” I called out once I was free from the horrible smelling tent. “Is anybody out there?”
Silence.
“Hello?” I walked slowly over to one of the tents. “It's… I know what happened to you. It happened to me too. Please come out!”
The tents were all zipped up and quiet. The fire had since died down to ashes and judging by the position of the sun, it should have been lit to cook breakfast by now. I could hear birds and the sound of the lake nearby, but no people sounds. That scared me; there are usually a whole lot of other hikers on this trail. Someone would have come by by now.
“Mark? Stacy? Brandon?” I called again. Still no answer, so I decided to examine the nearest tent, which belonged to Mark. The infernal zipper was there, taunting me and my blunt little stub legs. I tried to grip it with my mouth and pull it open, but it was easier said than done. The zipper was hard to grip in my new mouth, which felt sharper for some reason. When that failed, I went with plan B.
I rammed the sharp thing on my head right into the front of the tent. Whatever it is, it’s sharp and it punched a neat hole right through the canvas. I withdrew the… thorn, I guess? If I cross my eyes I can just barely see it. It left a hole nice enough to peer into. When I looked inside, it only made my situation more… grim.
It was completely empty. The sleeping bag had an impression in it of a human body, like it deflated around someone. A half eaten bag of chips laid on the floor, a few crumbs scattered about. His backpack remained in the corner, half packed and messy. A big rule of hiking is that you DO NOT go ANYWHERE without your backpack. It’s your kitchen, infirmary and armory all in one. It’s not something a fellow hiker would do.
I checked the other tents (after poking holes in them), and they all told the same story. Clothing, food, gear… all left in the same spot as the night before. All was quiet and still. It looked like… everyone was vaporized. Gone. All gone.
I started to shake a little. I traveled with a group for a reason. It felt safe and I knew these people well. It's not good for me to be by myself. If you couldn’t guess already I have… problems you can say. Anxiety, depression and paranoia will do that to you. This was a chance for me to get out and not feel sick for once. I was having fun, for it was the first time in a long time that I felt normal Now I was alone, with no other people, on the goddamn Appalachian trail in the middle of goddamn Clarence Fahnestock State Park. I had to sit at this point. I felt sick and cold. A sense of dread washed over me. I could not deal with two panic attacks in a row. I couldn’t.
I took a few deep breaths and did my best to try to squash away the thoughts of ending up dead and forgotten. My grandma waiting in her little trailer all alone, waiting for someone who would never come home again. Would she even know if something happened to me? If this happened to me… what about her?
My dark musings were interrupted as Yuri appeared in front of me with my medicine bag clutched in his jaws. He set it before me and barked once before sitting down. I couldn’t help but cheer up a bit. There may not be people, but I had Yuri at least. My change left me slightly shorter than him. Yuri was big already, being a German Shepherd, but it at least gave me reassurance that he could perhaps protect me from… whatever is out there. Bigfoots, aliens, or whatever caused this.
“Drink, please.” I commanded and with that, Yuri huffed and ran off to retrieve a bottle of water. He’s awesome.
My medicine bag, thankfully, was fastened with velcro, so it was easier to open than just poking a damn hole into everything. I dumped out my bottles. Citalopram, Clonazepam and Bupropion for good measure. I eyed my little packet of birth control and snorted. I doubt I will be needing that anytime soon. Imagine an ugly bug monster like me getting laid? So I tossed it away.
Getting the bottles open was a trial in itself. I tried using my mouth again, but I couldn’t grip the bottle, twist it and press down on it at the same time. These were safety caps, which meant even hands have a hard time opening them sometimes. I tried wedging the bottle between some rocks and pressing my hoof one the cap, but that only ended with me accidently punching a rock when I slipped. Yuri just sat with a bottle of water in his mouth, watching as I struggled to reach my medication.
Eventually, I got desperate enough that I decided the only thing I could do was break them open. So I went to the cleanest piece of clothing lying around I could find, and pressed as hard as I could with my body weight. Well, it somewhat worked. I got my pills, but I crushed a good half of them in the process. Goddamnit. All in all I figure I lost about four days to a week’s worth of pills with my clumsiness. Now I would have to pour all the loose pills and broken crumbs back into the bag and then somehow pick out the dosages later. At least they were all different colors.
The water bottle was the same, but at least I could open that one with my mouth. So thus having taken my medicine with a drink of water, I could sit and let them work their magic. Yuri just laid by my side, wagging his tail. I decided to join him and snuggled up.
Perhaps I was looking at this the wrong way. My paranoia tends to do that. Perhaps this is some X-Men level bullshit, or something. Maybe this is a dream and all I have to do is hang tight. Maybe… everyone else went somewhere to get help? It would be shitty if they did that and didn’t leave me a note at least. But at least I felt better as I could be in this weird alien body. I decided to do a trial—if they didn’t come back in two days, then I would leave. I would go home and check on my grandmother. But they are out there. I just need to be positive. I just need to not let my illness rule me and make me always think the worst immediately. As I felt calmer and more relaxed, I couldn’t help but smile.
Yep, they’ll be back.
Welcome to the Ponies after People group!
Preemptively adding to my favorites for the Kafka reference.
Will read this after work!
Damn.
This is as good as the original!
Also, A PAP story with a changeling posted a day after I posted mine... I'm watching you...
JK, funny coincidence.
Dayum. Great art, great writing, slight humour, Changelings, and hint of dark stuff. I like
Even if I'm usually not one for the depression/paranoia dark stuff.
I read every Pony After People story, most (around 70%) I just track (and like). This gets a fave.
Edit: Screw that, you get a follow.
Well done! Keep up the good work!
Should perhaps mention why she has a service dog.
6201560
If you look at the medications she's taking, you can see why she has a service dog XD. Prescribing those three medicines at once usually indicates the person is suffering from things like PTSD, Crippling anxiety, Depression, and extreme paranoia. A psychiatric service dog is also trained to bring their owner their medicine and water as well as to comfort their owner until a panic attack/flashback has passed. You'll see more about how awesome service dogs are as the story goes on :D
6201622 Err - no, you don't get to do that.
While in principle, this is discoverable by a google search, or if you are familiar with the medications involved, few people without direct involvement are going to understand.
It's like starting off with an ex-blind participant, and mentioning a specific brand of cane, or other appliance, and assuming that the readership will understand, though 99.9% of them will never have heard of it.
Ambiguity at the beginning that the reader can reason out with their existing knowledge is fine, not stating it just to be obscure is simply annoying.
6201643
Aaa sorry. It just feels....weird to have the protag just be like 'Hi I'm X and I have this disorder' right off the bat. I kinda wanted to uh...show through the actions and not outright just tell? Is it that jarring to not say right off the bat what's wrong with her?
Which were? Obviously the body has changed. The anatomy would change too so... I guess if he is ticklish in the belly that works in changeling form as well?
Uhmm what? Sorry I'm Greek.
Who is that?
Armory? Really?
Vaporized? More like something that a sci fi fan would say methinks.
How well? Were they Friends family relatives?
I suggest researching on the illness you want one to have in order not to end up not knowing what you are saying. I am guessing this is diagnosed right? This is just friendly advice as stuff like this can be easily messed up.
I am guessing you mean both psychologically and physically?
That a name or a title? What does it mean?
I am guessing you have visited that?
Yes. Never say never.
Neat. Still the part where you say "sick" and "dread". It would be better to describe those.
6201767
For ticklish spaces, I imagine the more sensitive spots like the ears and belly would still be sensitive.
This is what a horses frog is! It's pretty much the v shaped spot on the bottom of a horse hoof.
Gregor Samsa is the protagonist from the short novella The Metamorphosis by Franz Kafka
And yes an armory! People don't hike the trail without a knife or bear repellant spray. Some people will bring guns in the especially remote parts of the trail.
The protagonist like scifi!
They were friends, mostly from a hiking club!
I actually have PTSD, anxiety, and chronic depression. So a lot of this I can write from my own experience alone. I also take two of the three medications in the fics. Oh boy!
And not feeling sick for once means yes, both mentally and physically. Mental illness not only fucks up the brain, but the body too. There's sometimes rare days where you feel well on both fronts.
The Appalachian trail is a long hiking trail that nearly runs the entire east coast in the USA.
I have never been to Clarence Fahnestock State Park. But my New Yorkian pal has been there :D
Oh goodness there isn't any sex in this so yeah, she will not need the birth control lolol.
Thanks for your comments man :D I'll try and tweak some things here in a bit.
6201837 Wait... there's bear repellant spray?
6202088
Yup!
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bear_spray
It's pretty much super mace, for bears!
So far so good!
Also, digging the artwork.
Tis good. Have mustache spike
good so far
Nice title
This is some top shit right here, nignog. Good artwork, decent feels, and a dog. It's everything it needs to be.
6201671 Nah, you're doing ok. The story description was good enough to give the audience an idea what's up with the protagonist. I'll admit, I was a little bit in the dark on the details, but the story clued me in just fine.
Usually fics with depression-having protagonists just wind up being a mind-numbing-ly boring pity party. I kind of like that this is more so dealing with depression as an actual disability, rather than the typical loser suburban white kid feeling sorry for themself. Refreshing, I'd say.
6207264
Thank you :D I myself deal with depression so I can at least write about how it's like. The last thing you want is a pity party. You have to be constantly vigilant to cut off circular thinking and feeling sorry for yourself or a number of bad things can happen. For the protagonist, if she gives in it can mean death so of course she isn't going to want to do that. It is very possible to have a happy and full life with depression, you just have to monitor it like how someone with diabetes need to keep an eye on blood sugar. I'm going to be taking medicine for it for the rest of my life but I can honestly say I'm very happy :) The protagonist herself is actually happy too, it's just this situation is going to test her coping skills.
Thank youuuuuu to everyone else too for the kind comments :D I am writing chapter two now, hopefully it'll be out this weekend or so!
Aww, that art at the end is adorable and sad
And it's nice to see more bug fans out there in the big wide world as well.
nice story, I would properly feel the same way.
6208941
I second this. PS hey bluemoon!
6214051
Jahowl?
6214064
just saying hey.
6214078
Well, hi :)
This gonna be good.
Ahh.....The feels.
Hmmm....you have my intrigue as well as an up vote...for now. Let's see where this story goes and hope Melissa doesn't end up dying from a surprise apple attack. That's some pretty awesome art by the way. Also the first sentence after she threw up seems to have one too many 'haves' in it.
Well lets check it out.
That's a fun mixture. I'd be on all three if citalopram didn't leave me stoned out of my gourd. Was once a half-hour late walking to a friend's house because I was staring at a tree. They ended up switching it out for methylphenidate.
You wouldn't have happened to name your protagonist Melissa because of someone called Melissa 'Bug' Sucetti?
6208941 I have dreams of being a changeling, every night.
Why is she orange?
first story i've found in the ponies after earth verse where the main character is a changeling
Jeez man, this is your first story? That's really hard to believe.
6473453 Multiple hives?
now, its your story, and i can't control it... but if you do anything to that dog i'll want to do the same to you.
This is your first story!!? This story is amazing! Keep up the excellent work! Unbelievable.
I rather enjoyed reading this. I expected a little more out of the beginning -- considering it gets right into the story -- but I never expect much out of the story. I'm surprised to say that I'm excited to read the next chapter.
Citalopram might be a good pick since you're pretty body dismorphic right now.
Poor lil buggo
It's sad that the pic doesn't work...