• Member Since 6th Feb, 2015
  • offline last seen Dec 26th, 2023

RNBW


Just trying to think on what to write *shrugs*

E
Source

After an ordinary school day, Rainbow Dash meets an abandoned child. Without anyone else to take care of the child, Rainbow decides to take matters into her own hands by giving him friendship and love.

(Cover art by BlueSun52)

(First two chapters rewritten with Harmony Pie)

Chapters (11)
Comments ( 97 )

Ok im hooked good work. I like seeing Dash act motherly.

Whooa that something that you didn't see everyday. This story is good even with minor errors like when rainbow say to the kids colt.

I like the idea, but this chapter was kinda rushed (a lot actually)

6172250
Don't worry. The next chapters won't be like that.

Comment posted by Synthetic Soul deleted Jul 6th, 2015

Continue continue!

dude, when the girls see him they're going to lose their minds. this is how I picture their reactions
i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--iCS_PlYl--/c_fit,fl_progressive,q_80,w_320/18ixkp7zc9ta2gif.jpg

you have caught my attention. i shall continue reading. I will say this however: the pacing of the story feels rushed. slow it down a little. add more detail. show, not tell

a little better. you did more show and not tell. but i could still see some tell. but not as much as the chapter before. keep at it. you'll get better as you write more

6348448 definitely. I don't know why but for some reason, girls just go nuts whenever they see a cute kid, especially when its a boy. its one reason I love taking my little nephew everywhere I go when we hang out. because not only does he a bunch of attention I do as well.

6351140
Crazy, but very cute.

Never thought Rainbow would be taking care of a child. I like this. I'll follow it and see where this goes. Keep it up.:twilightsmile:

Glad you updated. This is a good story. This is one of the fewest stories that Rainbow ever takes care of a child. I love it. Hope you update soon. ^^

This sight could be only described as 20% Adorable.

Suited for Success and Rainbow Rocks reference? I don't think you used it right, but it still has the same effect.
Now, on to more serious matters. WHY IS RAINBOW TAKING IN SOME RANDOM KID!? HAS HER MOTHER NOT TAUGHT HER STRANGER DANGER!? HOW DOES SHE NOT ASK HIM ANY VITAL QUESTIONS!? YOU'RE MY SECOND FAVORITE OF THE HUMANE SIX RAINBOW, DON'T MAKE ME REVOKE THAT.
I'm counting Sunset as a part of the Humane six in this, by the way. Otherwise Rainbow would be my favorite.
Great story otherwise, by the way.
6351140
As a girl, I can tell you that's not true. Cute kids only effect those who are affected by cute kids. My reaction would be 'Rainbow, where did this kid come from?'

6778899
Rainbow lives on her own in my headcanon.

I don't think It'd be called Ponyville. I think it'd be Canterlot City, mostly because I'm guessing that is why the school is named Canterlot High School. But, hey, to each their own. The school could have been named after it's creator. Or maybe because the founder wanted their students to canter through high school, or...
Ten Hours of Ranting Later...
Wait, what was I talking about? Oh yeah, great Pinkie moment. That was what I was talking about, right?
:pinkiehappy::rainbowlaugh::raritystarry::yay::ajsmug::twilightsmile: = the order I rank the mane six. The humane six just have sunset at the front and :pinkiehappy:&:rainbowlaugh: switched around, and Twilight gone.

Long comment short, Pinkie is best pony and Rainbow is best human.

6778899 I was just going by experiences. Im well aware it's not a universal things of you will

its good to see this back again. great chapter, now I have to go pull a George R.R. Martin and kill of some characters

Man Comet's adorable! I'm glad to see this getting updated again. I'm curious to see how Fluttershy will react to him.

This chapter gives me so much feels. I love how you're writing everyone here.
Motherly Rainbow is best Rainbow.

Another great chapter bro. I like this a lot. Update soon. Happy New year!

6789179
Happy New Year to you too. :yay:

Hope to see new chapter because this is good one and happy New year to you.

6790705
Happy New Year to you too.

This is so amazingly fabulous I could scream:yay:
I can't wait for the next chapter

Okay, I am liking this story so far. It's definitely nice to see a more tender side to Rainbow Dash.

Hmmmm... Rainbow, what's your thoughts? :rainbowkiss:

And the other Elements of Harmony? :ajsmug::yay::raritystarry::twilightsmile::scootangel::pinkiehappy:

Scootaloo! I don't mean to pull a Diamond Tiara here, but I don't recall asking you to speak. Or randomly pop up in my comment I guess... not the point! The point is that CUTIE MARK CRUSADER COMMENTING should not be a thing.

I will make sure you get punished!

Where's Comet's father, I want to rip him asunder for hurting Comet.:pinkiecrazy:
Sorry about that, psychotic rage was showing for a bit there. But seriously, a great, heart-wrenching chapter and I shall eagerly await the next chapter.
And as always, Motherly Rainbow is best Rainbow.

A sleepover with Comet and the girls? I like it! Please continue.

great chapter man, and don't be afraid to call in the PoME army to teach that scumbag father a lesson, or even make him disappear
mise: yeah, I can make that happen!
would you get out of here!!! im sorry for that, its what we signed up for

6778899 How old is RD in this fic?

Abusing your own child just because your wife died? I feel like I've seen this scenario from somewhere...

Wait a minute, is this a universe where high school students are considered old enough to legally raise a child? The author mentioning colt sounds a lot like Comet crossed over from the Equestrian side of the portal. Finally, I'm pretty sure Sci-Twi's not that forward with kids.

6960963
No. This is the canon verse.

But I won't give you more information because it will be a VERY BIG spoiler.

6960818 Oh, did someone call for a slaughter? I'm in.
GET OUTTA HERE!!! Sorry about that.

6962085 we really need to put them some kind holding cell or kennel when travel outside of the PoME universe

6962146 Seriously.
Boss, do you really think Midnight would approve of me in a cell?
Don't worry, you two can share a cell.

6962157 im probably going ship mise somewhere else, like over seas because octy's pretty good about controlling
mise:...
say one word and im getting the hose! now get back in your cage!

6960949 Go read https://www.fimfiction.net/story/118939/a-mothers-love. It's a lot similar to this one only with a different plot.

6996129
6960949
Well, that story and A New Home from APoeticHeart inspired me to write this.

6996362
Kinda. He's very good at writing.

6996424 I also am a fan of his work. I'm amazed at HOW he can make a human OC work that I've wondered at multiple points if the A New Home fics were based offa real life.

6996436
Not to mention, the origins of the stories about a Pony adopting a Human (I might be wrong in that one).

6996493 There's that. Nothing's original anymore, but people love it if you have an idea that works, APoeticHeart is one of those authors who didn't join early on, but made it into the big leagues anyway. Instead of doing it like everyone else where the usual protagonist of a HiE would be a soldier, brony or a self-insert, he had Toby. APoeticHeart wrote Toby's story in a way that downright pulls on our heartstrings and then some. I'm also guessing he did it because of his love for writing, so yeah.

This was an awesome chapter. Comet was simply adorable, and I love that Rainbow wants to adopt him. I look forward to seeing the challenges that lay ahead for Rainbow and her friends.

Login or register to comment