• Published 19th Jun 2015
  • 2,282 Views, 63 Comments

The Princesses' Secret - Sleepy Panda



"Princess Luna, why aren't you and Princess Celestia queens?" Oh no. Ponies weren't supposed to ask that...

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The rebellion

"What's going on?" Sunchaser yelled over the noise of the blaring alarms, hastily throwing on her armor. She put some of her shoes on the wrong hooves, but she didn't really care. This was an emergency, and there was no time to worry about little things like that.

"It's raining mustard," a fellow guard helpfully informed her. Suncatcher rolled her eyes.

"Well duh, that much is obvious. What I want to know is why it's raining mustard."

As if on queue, Shining Armor started shouting at everypony. "Alright! As you can all see, we have a situation here. A group of pegasi decided to revolt against the queen's rule and are having a bit of fun with the weather by destroying this city with mustard. This is not funny!" he barked at somepony, who had let out a laugh upon hearing this. "Move out! Squad A, detain the rioters. Squad B, get the weather under control. Squad C, protect the citizens. GO!"

All the guards leaped into action - that is, all the guards except for Sunchaser. "Uh... can't I just join the rebellion?" she muttered to Posterior, who was just about to take flight.

"Absolutely not!" he scolded her.

"Ugh, fine. Which squad am I on again?" she asked sheepishly.

"Same one as me: Squad A. But you can't fly, so you'll be down here to bring the rioters into our custody. You'll probably help with the interrogation, too." Without another word, he leaped into the air and flew away.

"Huh," Sunchaser mused. Then she shrugged. "Meh, I'll just read a book until this whole thing blows over."


"By the power bestowed upon the royal guard by Her Majesty Queen Gaea, you are under arrest!" Posterior informed a pegasus.

Instead of allowing herself to be arrested, she blew a raspberry at him and chucked a mustard cloud at his face.

"Halt!" he demanded. The pegasus did not halt. She teasingly danced on top of a cloud. Unfortunately for her, Posterior wasn't in the mood for humor today. Or yesterday. Actually, he was never in the mood for humor, but that's completely besides the point. I think?

Whatever.

Anyway, Posterior was not amused, and he launched forwards, despite the fact that his vision was compromised by the thick mustard. The mare's eyes widened in surprise. She tried to dart away, but Posterior was too quick for her.

He tackled her to the... well, there was no ground, so both of them fell out of the sky. The mare screamed shrilly, alternating between curses and pleas to the goddesses. Posterior, on the other hoof, kept his cool and used the opportunity to latch himself onto the mare's back in a manner that ensured she was unable to move her hooves or wings. When he had a tight enough grip, he spread his wings out and the pair glided gently to the ground.

"Suncatcher!" Posterior called out over the pegasus' screams. Yes, she was still screaming, even though they were on solid ground again.

No answer. Posterior refrained from letting out an exasperated groan – that was bad form – and shouted her name again in a voice nearly as loud as the Princess' Royal Canterlot Voice. He became painfully aware that the entire had gone silent from shock of his voice, and resisted the urge to look around at his fellow guards, who were surely all staring at him. Even the mustard was so startled that it stopped raining from the sky. A few long seconds passed and the chaos gradually started to resume again.

However, the yelling did have the desired effect: Suncatcher grumpily stumbled out of a side door, squinting and shielding her eyes from the sun. "What do you want?" she demanded. "You're interrupting my nap."

"You're not supposed to be taking a nap; you're supposed to help arrest the protesters!" Posterior growled at her. He indicated the now unconscious mare - she must have fainted when Posterior yelled at top volume - and Suncatcher took the hint.

"Alright, alright. Geez. No need to get so worked up about it." Grumbling, she hoofcuffed the mare, slipped bindings over her wings, and levitated her over to the building where the prisoners were held.


"Sister, we are currently floating in a bottomless pit," Luna unhelpfully declared.

Celestia rolled her eyes. "I know that."

"Then why are you suggesting we eat cake?" Luna questioned.

"I'm not suggesting that we should eat cake. I was simply stating that a slice of cake would be nice right now," said Celestia, crossing her arms.

"While we are falling to our doom?" Luna sometimes didn't know what to think about her sister's logic.

"We're falling to nothing. It's a bottomless pit."

"But you cannot eat cake right now." Luna scratched her head with a hoof, trying to figure out what Celestia's point was.

"Yes I can." And with that, Celestia magically conjured a slice of vanilla cake from thin air. Luna stared wide-eyed in shock.

"Wait, how did you get that?"

"Hmm? Oh, I got the recipe from that amazing baker a few hundred years ago. It's a shame that you never got a chance to try his desserts. Would you like a bite?" Celestia offered.

"No, not that!" she gasped. "We still have magic?"

Celestia froze and dropped her cake in surprise, then she put a hoof to her forehead, cursing her own stupidity. "Right. Of course."

The two alicorns nodded and teleported out of the pit, reappearing back in Equestria.

Author's Note:

Sorry about the hiatus! Um... things sort of happened and I couldn't write or update anything. I'm rather burnt out right now. >.<

I also have no idea how the military works.

plz don't kill me for all the inaccurate things in this story.

Also, yes, Suncatcher is a unicorn who happens to be a weatherpony. Don't ask me how that works because I have no idea. She looks way too much like another one of my OCs.

Comments ( 1 )

The description and the names of the chapters make it sound very interesting, but I do not start reading stories that are on hiatus or that are incomplete but haven't been updated in a long time.

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