• Member Since 15th Dec, 2013
  • offline last seen Nov 24th, 2019

Fire Gazer the Alchemist

The pen is mightier than the sword, but the nuclear bomb's got them both beat.


After another horrible blind date, Octavia resolves to give up romance for a while. Naturally this gives Vinyl the idea to set her up on a few (dozen) dates at once.

Octavia is not amused.

Proofread by Majora

Chapters (2)
Comments ( 29 )

I just want to know what Gummy was thinking as he sat on the table.


Vinyl, you're missing the obvious solution: Ask Octavia out yourself. Duh.


She should've picked Gummy. He was clearly the best option.

What a cute story to read on my lunch break. Much like!

That went as well as expected. I love Rose's date.

The ending was nice and the moral a good one; you can't force a relationship, of any kind. Well, okay, not the good kind

Does something about this remind you of Breaking Bad?


:trollestia: Sorry. Anyway, a nice cute little story with a solid ending. It does what it says on the tin and fits into the overall canon well. I still can't believe she turned down Gummy though. :pinkiesad2: The only way that bit could have been better is with a Gummy monologue.

6157421 Eeyup.

6156976 Gonna address this now lest it become a frequently commented thing, but Vinyl's straight in this fic, hence why I implied she was dating Neon Lights.

"What is romance? Is it merely a distraction? A way for ponies to waste their time so they need not focus on the complex and unexplainable nature of the universe? Or is it something else, something greater? Could the prospect of love be more than just a tantalizing grape on the unreachable vine of happiness? Could it be that love exists, and those that find this elusive feeling know more about the universe than the rest of us could ever hope to? And what of the young gator, flinging his vulnerabilities out on the table for a full minute, hoping that this sliver of time might lead to finding his soulmate so he may snatch the grape from the vine and expand his knowledge of creation?" *licks eyeball*

Yeah, Gummy's bit there deserves to be added in to the main story. Just need to append a bit about Octavia hearing none of that.

I enjoyed this. Good job.:pinkiehappy::derpytongue2::moustache:


That was amusing and I really liked the ending, although I have to say I feel a little bit bad for Rose here. While the other two did definitely earn their failures, she just kinda got shot down by association. Granted she would probably have figured out a way to blow it on her own without that, but it was looking like she might have had a real chance if the others didn't screw her over by association.

Also, it looks like you lost a few words here:

The Bon Bon she remembered was vibrant and happy, but this pony was

Berry Punch, you magnificent bitch! :rainbowlaugh: Never change!

Yay for a Derpy victory! Not gonna lie, I think a Derpy ship would be an interesting spin, but I REALLY like how this turned out instead. :twilightsmile:

Dont worry Vinyl, there is no way that this can go wrong :scootangel:

Kekekekeke, this is funny! :D
Vinyl rules, hahaha.

Nice job!

Gummy, you goober 8D hahahaha.
Man this was great! I loved it, I was half expecting Vinyl to sit down and try her hoof at Octy, hehe.

And Derpy comes along and offers her friendship, how sweet~ :rainbowkiss:
nice job!

vinyl .derpy what did you do
derpy. i just dont know what went wrong
vinyl you set fire to evreything

Vinyl needs to give up, Octavia just has bad luck

Why, oh why does Ditzy have to make things cool? Doctor Hooves is fuckin stupid, and why did pinkie bring a damn crocodile there:facehoof:

At this point, Minuette’s face was more red than blue. “I-I guess you could I’m… enameled with you.”

I'd date her on the strength of that line alone.

Hell, I might propose.

6177837 That...Vinyl trying to speed-date Octavia would have been a perfect alternate ending.

Aw. Awesome story! ^-^ I love it. And Derpy did magnificently~ I hoped and hoped that she'd end up hanging out with Octavia ^-^ Muffin rating: 11 out of 10 muffins! :derpytongue2:

Aw, how adorable. So now, the only question left is whether Octavia or Derpy becomes Octavia's special somepony.

I don't think Octavia can be her own special somepony. :raritywink: Unless... oh. Eww, I'm not gonna even go there. :facehoof:

Invitations... yeah, total expert you got there!
Now if you excuse me, there is a avalanche of irony coming this direction and i reaaaaaaly hate to be caught by surprise!

Let me think

bad, worse, worst... worsest? ...
Wouldn't even know how to describe the dates after!

Yet kinda hoped Vinyl would be the last one sitting :>

ps. loved for Twilight take a seat without any idea whats going on ... or trying to study it XD

This was both funny and sweet :twilightsmile:

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