A young teen named Joel, is forced to travel with his rich jerk of a dad around the world, looking for artifacts, since his mom passed away. They end up in strange places, and meet strange people on their trips. However this trip is different. Joel stumbles upon some old ruins in the middle of the jungle. Escaping traps, solving puzzles, you know, dungeon stuff. Soon discovering a strange scroll, he ends up in Equestria. Will he be able to get used to the sunshine, rainbow, pony world. And will he be able to help the main six
stop an ancient evil, older than Celestia and Luna themselves. Find out in "A Whole New World."
A warning for you guys. The first few chapters are kinda rushed and aren't to great. I promise it improves later on. Please don't judge the story by the first few chapters. The first decent one is chapter 5.
Good so far but I do see some mistakes.
You missed a " at the end
I'm pretty sure this isn't a word. I mean, unless your trying to pull a Shakespeare here and create your own words.
And these are only at the beginning. Keep up the great work.
6098311 Thanks. I'll be sure to fix these mistakes.
6098319 your welcome. I'm assuming your new to writing stories. In any case welcome. I'd ask of you'd want to read any of mine but they're on a different website and its honestly a b**** to move them over here.
Have a nice day.
Signed, zemez god of earth and void.
And he's 14? I was born then as well and I'm not that young...
6098782 it might just take place in 2013 rapidash and good story
6098782 The story takes place in 2013. Earth years.
Because child abuse just isn't ever enough
your short description has some mistakes. "exciting" and 'this' for one instance. Hope you bring a new twist to the 'human in equestria' story concept.
6159288
I problably will.
The title of the story reminded me of this:
Is the next chapter coming?
6259112
Yes. If I get enough free time. It should be done in two to three days.
Conscious
Unless he's turning into a mollusk
Either
Umm, what? What exactly are you trying to say here? A draw? An ensemble? A closet? Because, somehow, I don't think you where going for a stringed weapon or instrument.
Also, when dialog between characters is used, always start a new person talking in a new paragraph so the reader can clearly see who is now talking.
Aside from that, good job.
6280880
Thanks for the heads up. I'll find and fix those mistakes. Oh. The bow is supposed to say closet. I always seem to overlook certain mistakes. It happens to the best of us.
awesome
write more faster pls
can you make chapters faster plz i love your storys every 3 hours i check for chapter 7 but it never comes
6312514
I'll try. I'm sick though, so don't expect me going all Usan Bolt on this story.
GUYS SOMEONE COOL NOTICED ME
nick the brony knows how to piss us off with those cliff hangers then we have to wait 1-10 days the struggle is real nick is the best at cliff so all fan are raging for more im not hating i love these storys i started reading this after your human and you i stoped reading it because of its clop this better not have clop
the tag says this story is dark but its not you want dark read human nature and nick the brony are you brain storming ideas or are you righting
guys well your waiting for chapter 7 read cole in equestria by edwax its really cool but i dont think edwax will make more chapters he better
6314462
I won't have any clop. But it will have some romance.
6314774
I;m kinda doing both. However I have most of my brainstorming done.
6314774
The dark tag doesn't really come into effect until near the end of the story.
where did joel go does rainbow try to find him please tell me i dont wanna wait till wednesday
6319016
Fine. Joel is heading to the Frozen North. The main six look for him, but don't know where he went. Two certain ponies find him and take care of him. I am not telling you who because that would spoil too much.
Oh dis gun b gud
The adventures of Joel now continue. What will he face up north? Only time will tell.
does joel hate the main six or all ponies how much does he. tell me so i can picture chapter 8 better
6362228
Well his past has been full of loneliness and sadness. He thought he made friends with the main six, but when he found out about their plans. He kinda thought of them as his dad, untrustworthy and cruel. The main six are not like this though. A part of Joels character is overreacting. He dosen't really despise the ponies, he just wants to live alone. His way of life he is used to.
what does original character mean
6368216
A character that hasn't been done before. Ether by design or personality, or both.
6369589 thanks your the best nick
you know nick your like a friend who puts up with all my questions thanks and your storys the 2nd best i have read
6369932
The magic of friendship man.
Ok. I am almost done the chapter. It should be done by tomorrow. Thanks guys for the patience.
More!
bro great chapter every time u leave a cliff hanger i wanna punch in the face but i wont keep up the good work and make us fans proud cuz dis is gettin real good
y u no chapter 8 r u on vacation or maybe hes dead probably not but can u speed up even in the slightest i dont care i just wanna know if it will be coming out or if its cancelled and it better not get cancelled
6580414
Sorry, but life (school) has really gotten in the way. I wish I had more time, but I need to keep my grades up. I will try to find more time for writing as soon as possible.
i under stand i dont have to worry im in grade 7 and good grades come easy to me i dont need to study