• Member Since 31st Jan, 2013
  • offline last seen Jan 22nd, 2023

Metaphor


E

An origin story from my own head, how the bat ponies came to be and what their role in Equestria really is.

May be a precursor to a full story, I'm not sure yet, but it just came to me a few days ago and I had to write it down. Enjoy!

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 2 )

This backstory is rather tragic for the foals' parents...


more powerful than her as such;

'as such' may be superfluous here

resentment of the ponies

resentment for?

This story could also use

her sister, Luna, having

a

to begin the night, she did not

lot

their nightly protector, ponies began

more

from the night, she had to find

commas.


Otherwise, nice work! :twilightsmile:

That was a good story.

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