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by Super Trampoline

Taking a Break From Guest Author Week Because Not That Many People Actually Submitted Guest Chapters

Once upon a time, my friends had me download a diet/food tracking app on my Pipbuck

These things on their wrists pasterns are Pipbucks.

or whatever the heck it's called, because despite being a flying pony, I'm more than a bit on the chonky side. I want to lose weight so that I can play more sports and also not die of a heart attack when I'm 47. Anyway, while using this app on my pipbuck, that thing from Fallout: Equestria, I discovered that each Pop Tart has 200 calories in it, so when I ate two packets of Pop Tarts this morning, I ate 800 calories! Oops! Pop Tarts are delicious, to the point of sort of being my Kryptonite. Remember that song, Kryptonite by Three Doors Down? The ultimate forgettable modern rock band?

Anyway, the point is, logging your calories helps make you more aware of your caloric consumption. I've lost like 16 pounds since the beginning of the year, but want to lose a lot more still. So I won't be an obese pony. Because I'm terrified of death and will more likely die early if I'm obese.

Honestly, I don't know how Pinkie Pie does it. Maybe she's secretly a hummingbird with insanely high metabolism. Or maybe she's not actually a pony, but instead whatever species Kirby the pink puffball is. I mean, it would explain some things. Or maybe she's just a fictional character who gets away with eating so much via the rule of funny. Who knows.

Anyway, the app is called My Fitness Pal. It's owned by Under Armour, weirdly enough. If you want to friend me on the app, my username is SuperTrampoline2. So yeah. Be careful when you eat Pop Tarts.
https://www.myfitnesspal.com/