An unlikely pair of ponies meet sometime after a mysterious plague wipes out most of Pony-Kind. Thalia, a shy and somewhat sheltered Unicorn meets another of her kind, who at first is not keen on the idea of her tagging along with him, but they soon grow a bond and begin to uncover the truth about what caused the sudden collapse of pony society.
So myself and my buddy Tairaisvuroium started a new RP based on a post apocalyptic version of the MLP world. This is our first post. The result of a full solid night of work. :work: A lot of unexplained themes in this I know, but I've always thought that exactly what a first chapter should do, as I stated in my S5 Season Opener Analysis.
Lemmie know what you think.
Midnight Shadow ©: SoulDragonWithFlow
Thalia ©: Tairaisvuroium
Survivors ©: souldragonwithflow & Tairaisvuroium
MLP:FIM ©: Hasbro
Well, I like it!
Story is good, just work on the format of scene changes so it will be easier to follow.
6013378
Oh? How so?
6015339
This is based on my observations as a reader
I recognise a scene change with little confusion when the author leaves double the normal space or even a written breaker such as
----------------------------------------—-----------------------------------
Now this sentence seems more detached from the one above it, signifying a change in scene or perspective .
6015422
I'll keep that in mind then. Thanks for the feedback