Slice of Life Arc, Pt. 3 & Rap Battle #29: Results and Aftermath
The next day found a certain cellist sitting in front of a cafe, leisurely drinking a cup of tea. Across the table from her, a filly and a mare sat, the latter glaring a bit at the former but the former simply poking at a fork with her hoof.
She put the cup down, finally looking at the other two. “Before I start counting the votes, I am required to ask - did you two decide on what you’re wagering?”
There’s an uncomfortably long pause before the smallest of them speaks up. “If I win… she’s to give up her poisonous habit.” She points at the pegasus, growling. “She has to stop drinking!”
The sea-green mare scoffs, sipping from her skein. “Fat chance.” She turns to Octavia, pointing her free hoof at her. “I win, she never talks to me again. Ever.”
The filly leaps to her hooves as she prepares to retort, but the cellist covers her mouth with a hoof. “And here I hoped the competition yesterday got rid of all this anger.” She tapped on the phone in front of her, scrolling down the page and counting the votes as the other two watched with mild trepidation.
Finally, she looked back up at them, nodding briefly. “Babs Seed won. About twenty-seven to twelve.”
“Yes!” With that, the brown filly turned and swiped the half-full skein from the mare next to her. “A deal’s a deal.”
“What?!” Lightning Dust growled, pointing at the younger pony. “How’s that possible? I had more skill than you!”
Babs looked up at her, smirking cockily. “Your caprician countenance suggests a heritage unusually rich in species diversity.”
The pegasus paused, her brow furrowing as she tried to figure out what was said. Finally, after about six seconds, she scratched the side of her head in confusion. “What?”
“The reason you don’t understand that is the answer to why you lost.” The filly laughs, waving a hoof dismissively. “Seriously, though, you’re not going to have this anymore.” She promptly flips the mug over, dumping its contents into a nearby rosebush.
“I’m glad to see you two are getting along.” Octavia glanced up, blinking in surprise at an approaching rain cloud. “Strange... I could’ve sworn it was supposed to be partially cloudy, today...”
Vinyl sitting down in Sugarcube Corner, a glass of lemonade in her magic. She smirked at the two stallions sitting across from her, lowering her shades to look at them. “So, how’d you enjoy the show, boys?”
The two looked at each other, then back at Vinyl, shrugging a bit. “Definitely one way to do a battle,” Yah-Shee admitted. “Not necessarily our way, but definitely effective.”
“Heh.” She shook her head, resting it on a hoof. “I bet you two prefer to play with swords, or something.”
“Us? No, personally, we prefer not to get into fights at all.” The blue unicorn chuckled. “We just like talking about them.”
“Well, then,” the mare quirked an eyebrow, gesturing between them, “please, share one with me. I like a good tale.”
Arrell chuckled. “I don’t mind a little ‘tail’ mysel-” He cut himself off as Yah smacked him. “Hey!”
“Enough of that.” The unicorn turned back to Vinyl. “And I don’t mean talking about fights that have already happened. More like commentating. It’s...hard to explain.”
“Try me.” She turned to the pegasus, wagging a hoof at him teasingly. “And shame on you, Arry. What would that mare from yesterday think?”
While the red pegasus grumbled to himself, Yah decided to try explaining. “Well, first we figure out a fight that ponies seem interested in seeing. Then, we research them, create a battle simulation between them, and then talk about the battle before and after it happens. That’s the simplest way to put it without getting into technical details.”
Vinyl blinked, tilting her head to one side. “...is that anything like that Screw Attack show? Death something?”
“...you could say there are similarities.”
“Gotcha.” She nodded, turning to the counter as hoofsteps reach her ears. “That should be Pinkie, and about time, too.” She rolled her eyes, waving a hoof dismissively. “I swear, Daisy arrived ten minutes ago, and-”
She cut herself off, her shades falling to the table to reveal pupils the size of pinpricks. “...what the…”
Standing in the middle of the bakery, wearing a pair of glasses attached to a fake nose and mustache, was a normally familiar yellow pegasus pony apparently trying to act out in front of a small crowd of bored-looking ponies.
Vinyl stared blankly at her, an eye twitching slightly. “Yah... Arry... tell me I’m seeing things.” She slowly turned to them, frowning softly. “Please?”
“Well...you’re definitely seeing things...” Arrell replied. “But I’m not entirely sure what those things are.”
She groaned, holding her head in her hooves. “...this is going to be a strange day...”
Yah-Shee shrugged. “It could be weirder.”
“Really?” She turns to him, frowning and pointing at the yellow mare’s flank. “She has Pinkie’s cutie mark. I can only assume Pinkie has hers or something... and that shouldn’t be possible!”
“Magic does a lot of weird stuff,” Arrell said, surprisingly rather calm.
Vinyl slammed her hooves on the table, turning to the red pony as she prepared to chew him out. However, their nonchalance gave her pause, the gears in her head visibly turning as she tried to understand why they’re acting like this. “You... knew this was going to happen?” She furrowed her brow, rubbing her temple. “How?”
“Well...” Yah sighed, rubbing his head. “First off, as you know, we’re not from this dimension. But dimensional travel isn’t just a random thing for us. In order to figure out the winners of our battles, we sometimes have to go to...well…really different places.”
“Sometimes places that are poorly written...” Arrell muttered.
Yah continued on, ignoring that. “Oftentimes, we see things that happen before they do in other universes, or long after they do in others. Your universe just happens to be behind, in comparison to what we’ve seen.” He chuckles. “Heck, I can bet you twenty bits that Ponyville will be covered in vines within a few months.”
“I’m not gonna bet with time travelers.” She scoffed, turning to look out the window. “And I thought that the D- why is the sky checker-boarded?”
“Rarity’s trying to handle the weather control,” the red pegasus answered casually.
“...so, what, she has Thunderlane’s cutie mark?” She scratched her head, confused. “That seems a bit odd, doesn’t it?”
“No, Rainbow Dash’s,” Yah corrected. “And Rainbow has Fluttershy’s, who as you saw has Pinkie’s, who has Applejack’s, who has Rarity’s, who as I just said has Rainbow’s. That’s about it.”
“...but…” Vinyl frowned, tilting her head to one side. “Rainbow’s cutie mark has to do with racing. Why is Rarity controlling the weather, instead?”
“I dunno, the same reason Applejack’s making dresses when she has diamonds for a cutie mark? We just know this stuff happens, not why it does.” Arrell shrugged.
“...brilliant.” She sighed, standing up and moving towards the door. “Let’s go. I can’t handle the headache this is giving me...”
Yah quickly stood up and ran to her side, Arrell following. “I don’t know if that’s a good idea, going outside right now...”
“What? Am I going to freeze, or something?” She opened the door and immediately jumped back, eyes wide. “Is that a tornado?!”
Arrell poked his head out the door. “To answer your second question, yes.” He looked up. “And same for your first question, in about five seconds. Might wanna close the door.”
She quickly slammed the door shut, shuddering softly. “This is too weird.” She looked at a nearby mare, frowning slightly at her. “Why aren’t you freaking out?”
The pink pony shook her head. “Because I’m not trying to understand it.” She tapped Vinyl’s forehead, smirking wryly. “That’s the only way your mind will stay intact.”
“Says you.” The disk jockey knocked the hoof away before walking over to Yah-Shee. “What should we do? We can’t leave - not with all that crazy weather out there.”
The blue stallion glanced at a nearby clock. “Actually, we should be fine in...about two hours.”
“Then, if you want to see something cool, you’ll have about twenty minutes to get to the library to watch Twilight get killed and revived as an alicorn,” Arrell added.
She immediately snapped her gaze to the pegasus, eyes wide in shock. “WHAT?!”
“Yeah, that was pretty much everypony else’s reaction,” the red pony continued. “It’s a long story. You can probably ask her yourself later.”
“...I want to just lie down a bit.” She started toward the stairs, pointing at the pegasus accusingly. “Don’t do anything pervy while I’m gone, Arry.”
The pegasus looked at Yah, annoyed. “What kind of pony does she take me for?”
“The kind you are.”
On the other side of town, a green stallion came back into the main area of Ponyville after an… interesting trip down to the farm. As he looked up, the checkerboard clouds did little to get his mind off the unusual sights he had already seen, and only compound his unease. He adjusted his bags a little from their dairy burden and set off toward the local DJ’s house, just wanting to get somewhere familiar and hopefully the way it should be.
Before he realized what happened, he was suddenly pulled into a house as he passed by it. The door was slammed shut, leaving the room in total darkness, the only sound a clattering from outside. After a few seconds, a new sound was heard.
“That was close.” A ball of blue fire appeared in the air before him, illuminating the face of a familiar unicorn mare. “Are you okay, Rhino?”
“Umm… yes?” He stared at her a moment before recognition kicked in. “Oh, wait, you’re the waitress from the diner, right? Umm… Angel, I think it was.”
“That’s correct.” She smiled softly, turning to the door. “I’m surprised you didn’t see that hail coming... b-but maybe you were busy...” She squirmed slightly, nervous. “...I didn’t interrupt anything, did I?”
He shook his head. “No, not really. Your little… helpful abduction only caught me on the tail end of a milk run, so no big deal.” He smiled. “I think helping me from getting pelted by weather overrules anything I might have been busy with anyway.”
“Oh, good.” She sighed in relief, nodding towards the kitchen. “It might be best to put your milk in the fridge. The, ah, new weather pony apparently likes dangerous weather.” She giggled shyly, hurrying forward in an attempt to hide her rosy cheeks.
“Good point, though, is that really all the work of one pony? I thought it was just an anomaly in the weather order or something. Are the rest of the weather ponies not doing anything?”
“That’s something I find a bit weird.” She frowns, sitting down at the simple metal table and lighting the candle with her flame. “The ponies in this town seem to just… accept strange events. The only time I’ve seen otherwise was when I moved here, and Cerberus wandered into the marketplace.”
“They do seem to have a high tolerance for unusual events…” He stowed the milk in the fridge, shutting the door before he thought a moment and looks to Angel. “Do you have a glass or two I can use?”
She blinked, gesturing to a cabinet next to the fridge. “They should be in there... I mostly use them for water, though.”
“That should work fine.” He walked over and grabbed one glass, turning to her with another one held questioningly in his magic. “Do you want some too?”
“...first, I have to ask one thing.” She pointed at the fridge, frowning slightly. “Where, exactly, did you get that?”
He tilted his head at her. “What, the milk? From the source, of course.”
“No, I mean…” She sighed, rubbing her forehead with a hoof. “...who did you get it from? Last I saw, Applejack went into Carousel Boutique and hasn’t come back out.”
“I guess that explains why she wasn’t at the farm… Does not explain why Pinkie was there though.” He fixed the two glasses and brought them over to the table. “But to answer your question, I got it from the cows themselves. I find things easier that way, plus most of them are nice to chat with for a few minutes while they get it.”
“That...” Angel tilted her head, confused. “...wait, what? Pinkie was at the farm? But... does she even know how to work on a farm?”
“If what I saw was any indication, she’s seen it done, but never done it herself.” He shrugged before taking a small sip. “All in all, it’s been a strange day so far… the abduction’s been nicer than I expected though.”
She frowned, a hint of pain leaking into her tone. “Please stop calling it that.” She turns to the side, looking at a small picture frame. “I know you’re joking, but...”
His ears tilted downward a bit. “Alright alright, I didn’t mean to upset you. I do appreciate your invitation into your house with the current weather conditions. Though, may I ask why the candlelight instead of normal?”
“...no reason.” She flipped the frame onto its face, returning her attention to him. “So, uh… you remember that filly? T-the one from yesterday?”
He looked at her questioningly. “Who, Pinchy?”
“Yes, her.” She smiled softly, gesturing to him. “She seems to be very close to you... I could see the adoration in her eyes.”
The stallion smiled as he takes another sip. “Yeah… she does seem to look up to me. I’m doing my best to be worthy of that, but for the life of me, I’m still not quite sure why she thinks that way.”
Angel stared at him blankly, tilting her head curiously. “You... really don’t know?”
“Do you?” He questioned. “I mean, i know she said it was because of magical ability, but I’m fairly certain it’s more than that…”
She shakes her head, turning her gaze to the table. “...I’m sorry. It’s something she should share, not me.”
Rhino blinked at this. “Okay… I guess it makes sense that a resident would know more about her than I do, being a visitor.” He took another sip, noticing she hadn’t yet. “You aren’t going to try the milk?”
“I…” She grimaced, squirming in her seat. “...I have some reservations about that… y-you can have it.”
“Are you sure? I’m sitting here drinking it myself, so there’s nothing wrong with it.” He took a big gulp for emphasis.
“I’m just not hungry…” She sheepishly smiled, shrugging a bit. “N-no offense. I mean, I’m sure it’s good and all…” She trailed off as her stomach decided to protest, growling loudly at her.
His horn was lit up, but he hadn’t taken the milk yet. “Are you sure?”
“Y-yes, I’m sure.” She stands up, grabbing the picture and heading towards the door. “I-I’ll be right back. I need to... freshen up a bit.”
“Oh… okay…” He watched her exit, leaving just him in the flickering light. Rhino sighed as he finished off his glass and moved to hers. “I wonder if I upset her somehow…”
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Tying this in with Magical Mystery Cure, I see
Nice to see another chapter
Hmm, I finally managed to catch up with your story, I plan on doing full critique at some point (I presume you don't mind, it could be interesting considering how different the current story is from what it started as). Either way it was nice to finally have the results from the last chapter, but there is one thing I've noticed that's made me curious enough to mention it now; I've noticed you seem to have a bit of a....hang up (I think that's the right word here) with alcohol, or at least strongly opposed to it.
It's probably a bit strange for me to be the one to talk about this, considering I've been old enough to drink for a while now (where I live the legal drinking age is 19) and never had or planned to; but I do have an odd habit of challenging other peoples decisions, even if they're considered good ones and I've made a similar one, and try to make them think about it more carefully (especially if I disagree with the reason)
suggestion
Blueblood as scrooge vs Filthy Rich as Jacob Marley
then Blueblood's Grandfather as the ghost of hearth warming past
Fancy Pants as the ghost of hearth warming present
and princess Celestia as the ghost of hearth warmings to come
3669885 You mean Filthy Rich as Donald Trump, right? And you do not substitute Death with anything except a differently shaped Death.
3670030 Donald Trump was playing the role of Jacob Marley. That's what he meant. The rap battle was based on a Christmas Carol.
3670030 Would Mort work then? From the story Mort Takes a Holiday.
Meh, I started chapter 1, but the rhyme scheme of the lines being AABBAABBisn't really a "rap battle" it is more of a "rhyme battle". It should be ABABAAB or ABABCBA.
3669885
3670030
3670167
3670172
"We kind of already have a thingy planned for that, dude."
3670723 I bitch and moan about everything
3670777
"And we listen to every comment. It may take a while, but we try to do something about it."
3670709 Hmm, can't wait to see what you have planned. Also, how have things been for you? Been a while since we kind of talked.
3672107
"Alright, I suppose. Could do better, but not complaining."
I am so lost at this point it's not even funny.
3670167 I'm not very familiar with that story, so please forgive me?
3670172 To give you the long answer, yes.
The only things I could follow in this chapter were the conversation between Vinyl and the DB:E duo and the Magical Mystery Cure mentions.
Could somebody besides the author tell me the important stuff that I missed? 'Cause if enigma has to explain in ways other than through the story, that would be an indication that he didn't do a good job. I'm pretty sure he did do a good job and it is my fault for missing whatever it is I missed.
fc03.deviantart.net/fs70/f/2012/060/f/5/princess_celestia_approved_by_ambris-d4rftlj.png
Approved for Celestia's Library.
3728844
"Hopefully that clears things up. Also, said stories are on Rhino's userpage."
"Not something I couldn't explain. Just something I needed to keep secret for a few other stories."