The Alpaca Prince
Part 2: Eyes
“I wonder how the children are doing?” King Fluffington thought aloud, adjusting the cards in his hoof. He looked across the table at Celestia, who sipped her tea idly and then took two cards to replace her old ones. They shared a knowing smile. No doubt there was a fiasco of ‘cultural exchanges’ going on even as they spoke. “My son was very eager to meet your warrior princess, Twilight Sparkle.” He smirked, pushing forward a golden amulet and three blue chips.
“Less warrior, more worry wart,” Celestia admitted with a tinkling chuckle. She called his bet, putting down her cards. “Her heart is big, I’m sure they’ll get along just fine.”
“My son is a bit… bombastic, are you sure they’ll be okay together alone?” he fanned out his cards. Celestia shook her head with a sigh. Under all that fluff she could never read him during cards. Taking off her crown as payment she put it playfully on his head. She knew he would give it back before night’s end, it was just a game between them. She glanced at the seven foot buster sword next to herself, admiring the keen edge and wonderful rune work. An heirloom of his no doubt.
“I’m sure they’ll be fine, let us worry about ourselves. You visit so seldom anymore, Fluffington,” Celestia let her tail drag over the table as she walked past the table and behind him. “Troubles in the northeast?”
“Oh no, no I assure you,” his face was red, though he did turn to paw at her a little. His eyes trailed up the length of her gorgeous tail to her rump, then quickly jumped to her face. He knew that look, and it colored his cheeks.
The sun touched the horizon.
Giggling in a feminine way, she played with one of his ears, then kissed either of his cheeks as was expected. “May I?” she asked with a filly-like smile.
“Oh yes, of course,” King Fluffington said, flattered all the more. Settling onto his belly, he nodded for her. Celestia stepped up onto his back and settled on him like a great white swan in a nest of blissful fuzziness. Her hooves found his shoulderblades and rubbed idly. He purred despite himself.
“So, what can Equestria do for Alpacastan, huhm?” Celestia murmured in his ear. “We spent the day renewing all of our older trade agreements. Is there… anything else?” she said softly. The king’s coltish grin split his stoic exterior before he could stop himself. “So fluffy,” the alicorn chuckled happily, settling atop him as he flipped over on his back. His floofy bangs fell back to reveal his silver eyes. They twinkled.
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Twilight found Prince Cudfellow pawing through a bookshelf the next morning she saw him. He turned and brightened when he saw her. Shifting her weight quickly, she leaned forward when he took her ears and mwah-mwah’d her face in greeting. “Good tidings, my purple house-wren!” he said. “We are to explore roundabouts today, yes? Excited!” he told her. “I slept well, and I hope you too?”
“Oh yes I did.” Twilight said, smiling. “Sounds like fun! I’ll show you around town, maybe to the park!”
“I would be most honored!” it was strange to hear him perfectly articulate some sentences and not others, but Twilight knew the poor Prince had probably been taught certain phrases and told to use them often. It was kind of cute, really. Giving Spike free run of the castle (“Yesssss!”), the Prince and Princess set out.
Some ponies stared, others pointed, and a reporter or two came up to them almost before they’d gotten out of Twilight’s front yard. “Princess Twilight, Princess Twilight, how is the summit between Equestria and Alpacastan going?! Are any trade pacts breaking because of the Northeast pass freezing over in certain areas?! How is Princess Celestia going to handle the upturn in crude oil pricing?!”
Twilight’s muzzle rumpled. “You should probably ask Princess Celestia those questions,” she said in mild annoyance. “Seeing as I am not present at these negotiations. I am merely hosting Prince Cudfellow here at Castle Friendship.” It did sound like babysitting when she put it that way, but neither she nor the Prince were ready for the political arena yet, so Celestia’s ‘meet and greet’ was probably for the better anyway.
“But how will Equestria maintain a healthy economy with Alpacastan’s vice grip on Ironwood and certain minerals?!” the second reporter looked genuinely panicked.
“…buying local goods,” Twilight decided carefully. Both reporters blinked twice, and opened their mouths to question further, tape-recorders hovering in front of them.
Prince Cudfellow was not pleased with the interruption. “Coming through, coming through!” he POOF’D himself up like a puffer fish, his fur almost completely round. “Come along, Princess!” he called over his shoulder. The reporters were oh-so-gently floof’d aside as the two of them continued down the street. Both reporters stared after him, completely cowed at the display. Twilight followed quickly, hiding a smile behind a hoof. This was funny! She decided she really did like the Prince right then.
When they were safely away the Prince deflated to his normal shape. “Such rudeness!” he said conversationally. “I should bite their cooches!”
“What?!” Twilight jerked to look at him.
“Their cooches!” he repeated, touching his face. “This is cooch, yes?”
“Cheeks, Prince Cudfellow. Cheeks.” Twilight giggle-snorted before she could stop herself.
“What did I say?” he asked, cocking his head.
Twilight decided not to answer and coughed twice, spotting Fluttershy on the sidewalk with a basket of groceries in her mouth. Waving her over, the purple more introduced her. “Prince Cudfellow, this is my friend Fluttershy. Say hullo?”
“Hullo, friend!” the Prince took her hoof and kissed it politely. (Twilight had asked him not to grab anypony else’s ears like hers)
“Oh, uhm, hullo…” Fluttershy said meekly, ever-shy at meeting someone new. “Prince Cudfellow, from Alpacastan?” she asked.
“That I am, yes,” he nodded.
“I uhm… I admire your country’s… uhm…” she paused to think for an awkward moment. Alpacastan was a terrifying tundra of jagged mountains, deadly ice-waters and winter dragons. “Policy on furs,” she decided with a gulp.
“Oh yes yes,” the Prince said knowingly. “Alpaca fur grows and sheds so rapidly, we thought to share it with less furry creatures! So we do not hunt the life of the wild to stay warm.”
“You share your own fur?” Twilight looked at the expanse that was the Prince’s fluffy body.
“Oh yes, yes. We are to be shedding anyway, but we make for nice beds and wigs and such!” he articulated as best he could. “You may have alpaca-fur pillow on your bedtime, Princess! Perhaps I may see your bedroom sometime.”
Fluttershy’s eyebrows LAUNCHED about three inches, and Twilight looked at the yellow mare helplessly. “Oh my…” she mumbled. “Are you two, uhm…?”
“N-no! I promise!” Twilight said quickly, red-faced. “Th-that’s not something we normally do in Equestria, Prince Cudfellow. L-let’s go. Nice to see you Fluttershy!” she herded the Prince along, smiling awkwardly at her friend.
“He’s very fluffy…” Fluttershy mumbled, smiling a bit before getting her grocery basket and continuing on her way. “How nice…”
“Can I ask you a personal question?” Twilight asked as they at last came to the bowing bridge. “I’ve been wondering it since you arrived, actually.”
“Oh yes, ask of me anything!” they paused to look at their reflections in the river below the bridge. “I am having no secrets from my kind warrior-Princess.” He gave her a genuine smile and watched her cheeks color.
“…how can you see?” she leaned, pawing at the massive eyebrows. Fur tufts covered his forehead and met his muzzle, obscuring his eyes.
“Oh! Haha!” he reached up, tousling his bangs a little. “Alpacastan is very cold, one learns to keep face covered, especially the eyes, to blot out the icy bite of wind!”
“What color are your eyes…?” Twilight reached and lifted at his bangs a bit.
The Prince yelped, leaping back with a scarlet face. “Why Princess! The scandal!” he said with a shriek. Twilight’s stomach sank. Something cultural had just crashed into her, she knew it. The Prince chuckled nervously. “Erm, erm, you could not know I am thinking.” He cocked his head, looking at her. “Er… how does one say…?” he thought for a long time. “Loving… time?” he said to her. “Alpaca look into alpaca eyes during… ehhh…”
“Intimacy?” Twilight offered miserably, humiliated at herself and red in the face.
“Yes, yes!” they shared a long, very awkward silence. “Erm… my eyes are grass-colored,” he offered. “Sh-shall we to the park, then?” he said, hoping to push the awkward moment away. Twilight quickly agreed, and they were away.
End of Part 2
5997609 Like I said, I realize it can be used as he did, but I was just wondering if he had realized what he wrote to make sure lol
Damn, first this Prince ejaculates 5 minutes after meeting Twilight, now he wants in her bedroom and is talking about biting cooches?
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I like alpacas!
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I celebrated this glorious event!
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Thank you for writing this!
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I think I just had an overload of cuteness... Aww. Cudfellow is adorable.,
And this chapter also had me laughing. Also, wow Celestia.
Was not expecting the, uh royal alpaca sex. (Now there's a sentence I never thought I'd end up typing.)
The story's still very entertaining, but it's a little weird how it can't seem to decide between being bawdy or being cute. Still, like I said, it's entertaining, so maybe that doesn't matter. I look forward to your next chapter!
These alpacas are starting to remind me of Fluffle Puff with all of their glorious fluff.
I love you language barriers, you never cease to entertain me!
I have a new theory, that all character interactions become better if one character is ridiculously fluffy, and the other has normal enough pilosity to fully appreciate the fluffiness.
And another chapter full of fun.
While it was quite obvious what was going to happening in the beginning of the chapter, the very end completely nailed it
oh such a scandalous chapter lol i loved it
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What can I say? The inspiration never ends... maybe someone will be inspired by your song, to keep the chain going!
Oh my...
I guess Fluttershy is the only pony in Ponyville (and possibly Equestria) who is almost halfway decent. All those mares (and stallions!) with scandalously short manes or hair lewdly pulled back into a pony-tail!
Walking through Ponyville must feel like Soho on the weekend (Or Bourbon Street on Mardi Gras) for the prince.
I believe at this point the trade summit has reached a climax after mounting tensions and a vigorous back-and-forth exchange concerning Alpacastan's thrust into Equestria once the Alpacci king personally ensured that the pass into Equestria was warmed up...
Oh god, I am dying!
No joke, Prince Cudfellow is seriously the funniest OC I've read on this site.
6008566 I am so stealing this for a letter....
This reminded me of the intro to Dark Souls.
Biting their cooches XD I think I'm dying! This story is just... Amazing
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I thought that Celestia was being a little romancer, but it seems that I may have misread the intents of her actions. Maybe.
And the prince? Damn he's a hoot!