8 – Full of Surprises
Act II
Trust
⠀
⠀
Chapter Eight
Full of Surprises
⠀
⠀
To her amazement, Fluttershy had found herself looking forward to the evening. It was to be her second date with Twilight, and their first that would be relatively private. Other ponies were at the restaurant, but no one else was with them. It was the sort of thing that would normally send Fluttershy into a panic attack, and yet, she had looked forward to it.
Which was why it was much less surprising when she then found herself panicking about it. By the time she was looking forward to it again, it was only slightly surprising, and by the time she was panicking again, she had gotten used to the routine.
It was hard to say which emotion was dominant when Twilight came to pick her up for their date. Her mood had run between two extremes so often that it had at some point tripped and blended the two together, making it impossible to figure out where one ended and the other began.
She had told herself that it would be okay. That once she was with Twilight, things would start feeling more normal. That’s what had happened on their first date, after all. This one would be the same. She’d start the evening feeling awkward, but then Twilight would be there and she’d remember that they had been friends for years, and there was no reason to feel uncomfortable around her friend.
Fluttershy had told herself that it would be okay. She had been wrong.
Twilight sat across from her and adjusted her silverware for the umpteenth time. They had already ordered and were waiting for their meals, which gave them the perfect chance to talk. They sat in silence.
At least Fluttershy had done a little to try and look her best. When they decided to go to a casual restaurant where nopony else would realize they were on a date, Fluttershy had thought that meant they would skip getting dressed up. Applying her makeup had been a last minute decision, and she kept it at a light application.
She had been afraid even that much might be overdoing it, but then Twilight showed up. She hadn’t dressed up, at least, but Rarity had done her makeup and styled her mane in a crown braid. Between that and the perfume she wore, Fluttershy wondered how she thought other ponies wouldn’t think it was a date.
She hadn’t said anything, though. Which seemed to be the tone for the evening. They had walked together through town, going from Fluttershy’s cottage to the restaurant in an increasingly uncomfortable silence. They had only spoken briefly about the items on the menu and what each of them wanted, then they placed their orders and had been sitting silently ever since.
Twilight noticed Fluttershy was looking at her, and grinned sheepishly. It made Fluttershy blush, and she averted her eyes just in time to hear Twilight say, “You, uhm, look nice.”
That made Fluttershy blush even more, just as it had the last two times Twilight had said it. “Thank you…” she mumbled quietly. She tried to look up to return the compliment, but her eyes immediately found the table again. “Uhm, you too…”
Twilight went back to adjusting her silverware.
Their appetizer coming was a relief. Even if it didn’t wind up giving them something to talk about, it would at least give them something to do while they sat in silence.
“Here you go, stuffed mushrooms,” their waitress said as she set the plate down. “Can I get you two anything else? Refills on those waters, maybe?”
“That’d be great, thank you.” Twilight levitated the cups onto the waitress’s platter for her. The awkward silence had prompted both of them to drink more than they normally would’ve.
“These look great,” Twilight said once the waitress was gone.
“Mhmm,” Fluttershy said with a smile. At least that was something easy to agree with, and it just might get them talking after all.
Fluttershy leaned in to get one, but she was stopped by Twilight. “Here, let me get that for you.”
A purple aura surrounded one of the mushrooms and levitated it onto Fluttershy’s plate. Fluttershy stuck an awkward smile on her face and thanked Twilight. Just when she thought things were going to get better, Twilight’s needless doting reminded her this was a date.
Although the mushrooms looked and smelled delicious, Fluttershy found herself wishing they were the main course so they could get the rest of dinner over with. She felt guilty at the thought since she knew this date meant so much to Twilight, but reminding herself of that made her feel guilty too.
This meant so much more to Twilight than it ever could for Fluttershy, which meant she was just toying with Twilight’s emotions by encouraging them. Still, she couldn’t bring herself to hurt her friend, so she ignored the heaviness of the silence and ate the mushroom Twilight had given her.
The only break from the awkwardness came when their waitress returned with fresh glasses of water, and then it was back to silence. It seemed the hope that the appetizer would give them something to talk about had been unfounded, but at least it did give them something else to turn their attention towards. Even so, Fluttershy couldn’t help but feel awkward whenever Twilight passed her a mushroom, which she insisted on doing even though the plate was easily within reach of both of them.
Not that things wound up improving when they did find something to talk about. The lack of conversation and their shared desire to busy themselves with something else resulted in the two of them eating their way through the mushrooms quickly, until there was just one left.
“Oh, you can have it,” Fluttershy said when Twilight tried to levitate it over to her.
“But it’s the last one, you should have it.”
Fluttershy pushed the plate towards Twilight. “It’s okay, I know you really like them. Besides, I’m sure our meals will be ready soon.”
“Fluttershy, I insist. I don’t mind waiting, and I…” Twilight blushed and looked down at the table. “I want to make sure you have a good time tonight.”
“I…” Fluttershy looked down at the mushroom. In truth, she really didn’t want it; their food hadn’t even arrived yet, and she was already filling up. But she didn’t want to be rude when Twilight was trying to be nice, so she pulled her plate back anyway. “Thank you, Twilight.”
At least Twilight smiled. Fluttershy awkwardly returned it, then popped the mushroom into her mouth.
“The food here sure is great,” Twilight said.
Fluttershy swallowed and nodded. “Yes, it’s uhm… really good…”
“I’m sure our meals will be here any minute.”
“Yup.”
Twilight shifted in her seat and went back to adjusting her silverware. Fluttershy preoccupied herself with looking around the restaurant. Neither of them found anything else to talk about.
Mercifully, Twilight had been right about their meals arriving soon. Their waitress returned with their meals. Stir-fried sesame vegetables with rice for Fluttershy, and roasted portobello with broiled potatoes in a butter sauce for Twilight.
“Can I get you two anything else?” the waitress asked after setting down their plates.
“No thank you, I think we’re good here,” Twilight answered.
“Alrighty, I’ll be around if you need anything!”
They both thanked the waitress, then Fluttershy took a bite as she walked away. The evening might be awkward, but at least it was delicious.
“This is really good,” Twilight said after trying her own meal.
Fluttershy smiled and nodded. “Mine is too.”
“So… Have you eaten here before?”
Fluttershy giggled. “Uhm, this is where we all went out to eat to celebrate the end of last year’s apple harvest.”
“Oh!” Twilight facehoofed. “I knew that. Well, of course I knew that, I was there. I mean, you know I was there because we were there together, well, not together together of course, it was just that you were there and I was there, but all our friends were there too, and… I’m… going to just stop talking now.”
Fluttershy couldn’t help but smile at Twilight’s growing blush, although she at least tried to hide it behind her hoof. She preoccupied her mouth by taking a drink of water while she composed herself.
“I, uhm…” Fluttershy’s eyes darted downwards, but she was determined to try to keep talking now that they had started. Even nervous rambling was better than more silence. “I’ve been to most of the restaurants in Ponyville.”
Twilight nodded. “I guess it’s not that big of a town, and you have lived here for a long time.”
“You say that like you haven’t lived here for a while yourself now.” Fluttershy counted the years since that fateful Summer Sun Celebration in her head. “Three years now. You must’ve seen most of what Ponyville has to offer by now.”
“I guess I probably have. But that’s okay, I love Ponyville. And, uhm…” Twilight blushed and looked away.
Fluttershy quirked her head to the side. “Hmm?”
Twilight’s blush kept up as she idly moved her food around her plate. After a moment, she shook her head and smiled. “It’s nothing. I just… really love Ponyville.”
“Oh.” Fluttershy quirked her head to the side, but she didn’t push for more. Nor did Twilight offer it, preferring to instead busy herself with her meal. She looked around the restaurant idly as she ate, making more conversation unlikely.
Well, it was nice while it lasted. Even if their exchange was brief, the little bite of normality that the conversation brought had been appreciated.
Fluttershy fed the silence for a few moments as she ate a couple bites of her meal. The food itself was perfect, and she loved spending time with Twilight. The two of them often did things without their other friends, after all. Why did everything have to be different now? Why did everything have to be worse?
Even when Fluttershy tried to start a conversation, it only met with limited success. “Do you, uhm, remember the ducklings we were going to see on the uhm, the day you… that day before Cheerilee’s birthday?”
Twilight nodded, although she still wouldn’t meet Fluttershy’s eyes. “Of course. We wound up seeing the otters playing instead.”
“Yup.” Fluttershy smiled. “Well, those little ducklings just started getting their full-grown feathers in!”
“Oh yeah? That sounds really nice.”
“It is.” Fluttershy smiled that the conversation was going, but it only lasted a moment until she realized that she had no idea how to continue it. And, by the look of things, it didn’t seem like Twilight was going to continue it either.
‘Come on, Fluttershy! You know so much about ducks, just say something!’
But one look at Twilight silenced those thoughts. Twilight was just moving her food around and taking small bites, and Fluttershy realized what was going on. She didn’t know how it had taken her so long to put it together.
Fluttershy was not the only one who wasn’t having a good time. Twilight had wanted to date Fluttershy, but now that she had, now that she saw what that meant, she realized that she had made a mistake. What did she have to offer Twilight? How could anypony possibly enjoy going on a date with someone like her?
She didn’t try to talk for the rest of the date. Neither did Twilight, aside from a few questions about whether Fluttershy needed anything. But that was no surprise. If anything, Fluttershy had to give Twilight credit – even though Fluttershy had ruined things, Twilight never faltered in her politeness, never called attention to the failure by ending the date early.
“And do we want to do anything for dessert tonight?” their waitress asked once finally they stopped playing with their food long enough for her to collect it.
Twilight’s smile gave no sign of her disappointment. “What do you think, Fluttershy? Feel like something sweet?”
“Oh, uhm…” Fluttershy bowed her head so she wouldn’t have to look at Twilight. “I think… I’m a bit too full.”
“Alright, I’ll be right back with the check. Did you want me to split it?”
“No,” Twilight answered. “One check is fine.”
“Oh!” Fluttershy watched as the waitress walked away, unable to bring herself to stop her. She turned instead to Twilight. “I, uhm, I have some bits, I could…”
Twilight smiled. “Don’t worry about it. You’re my –” she glanced around the room, noticing the other ponies within earshot “– guest. I don’t mind paying for both of us.”
“Oh, uhm…” Fluttershy fidgeted in place. “Okay then.”
The waitress returned with some to-go boxes and the check, which Twilight covered. Fluttershy kept her eyes fixed on the table until they were on their way out, letting Twilight levitate their leftovers alongside them. She barely even noticed as the waitress thanked them and wished them a good night.
Matching the tone of dinner, the walk back to Fluttershy’s cottage was mostly silent. They walked side by side, and Fluttershy kept her eyes on the ground, never daring to look at Twilight.
Several minutes had already passed in silence before Twilight tried speaking. “Dinner was really nice.”
Fluttershy half looked towards Twilight, but didn’t quite turn far enough to meet her eyes. “Yeah, it was… nice.”
“You, uhm…” Twilight’s voice faltered and Fluttershy’s eyes returned to the ground. She never found out what the rest of Twilight’s sentence would have been.
They walked with nothing but their thoughts for a while longer. Fluttershy replayed the dinner in her head, even though there wasn’t much to focus on. Just minute after awkward minute of Fluttershy making things hard on both of them.
Was she disappointed things hadn’t gone better? Sure, she’d had some hopes. But she had never really wanted to be with Twilight when it came down to it. So then why was she so upset about the way things had turned out?
Once they were three-quarters of the way to her cottage, Fluttershy slowed her pace. Twilight didn’t notice at first, getting several steps ahead of the pegasus before turning back. When she did, Fluttershy stopped completely.
“Is… everything okay, Fluttershy?” Twilight asked
Fluttershy looked up at Twilight and realized she didn’t know what to tell her. How could she, when she didn’t even know the answer herself?
“I, uhm…”
“Are you not feeling well?”
Fluttershy shook her head. “It’s not that. It’s just, uhm…”
Why did Twilight have to look at her like that? Why did Twilight have to look so worried? It had been Fluttershy’s fault, she’d been the one to ruin things. What good did this misplaced sympathy do either of them?
“I… You, uhm, you don’t have to walk me all the way back home, if, uhm… if you don’t…”
Twilight stepped closer to Fluttershy and smiled. “Is that all? Trust me, I don’t mind walking you home one bit. Ponyville is always nice to walk through in the evening, especially… uhm… Well, I just don’t mind is all.”
After another moment of hesitation, Fluttershy resumed walking. “I’m sorry… I’m just…” Fluttershy struggled to find a way to finish that thought, but no more words came. She tried to fish for something acceptable to say until it dawned on her that she’d already waited too long and any answer would only be even more awkward.
At least they were close to her cottage. Neither of them spoke for the remainder of the walk, which proved just as well. As unpleasant as the silence had been all evening, talking seemed to be even more painful.
“Here we are,” Twilight announced as they reached the cottage. They lingered by the door and didn’t look at each other.
“Yup.” Fluttershy glanced towards her house, unsure of exactly what to say. “Uhm, thank you for dinner. It was… nice.”
“Don’t mention it! I had a great time too.”
Fluttershy wouldn’t say either of them seemed to have had a great time, but then, Fluttershy didn’t say anything at all. Another painfully long moment passed, and she was left wondering if she should just say good night and go inside.
“Oh, here.” Twilight levitated one of the to-go boxes out for Fluttershy, who thanked her and tucked it under a wing.
More silence.
Eventually Fluttershy stepped towards the door. “Well, I uhm…”
“Right!” Twilight said. “I shouldn’t hold you up. You probably have to get up early to take care of the animals tomorrow.”
Fluttershy smiled. “Yes! The animals! Have to be up bright and early for, uhm, them.”
Twilight nodded, took a small step closer, then hesitated and backed up again. “So… good night then!”
Fluttershy opened her door and stepped inside. “Good night!”
She waved to Twilight, then closed the door. Once it was shut, she let out a sigh of relief which she felt only marginally guilty about. She enjoyed spending time with Twilight, really she did, but not like that.
‘Not when everything I do just makes things worse…’
With a sigh of a different sort, Fluttershy shuffled into the kitchen. She stowed her leftovers in the fridge, then shuffled back out again.
Why had she ever thought things could be different? Why had she let herself get hopeful that this could ever work? Things like this didn’t work out. Not for ponies like her.
Fluttershy wanted to just go upstairs and collapse into bed, but she instead found herself wandering to her bathroom mirror. She studied the pegasus she saw in her reflection.
It wasn’t like Fluttershy was naïve. She certainly wasn’t stunningly beautiful like Rarity, but she knew she was passably attractive. She was not the pony anyone would fall in love at first sight with, but she knew others did find her attractive.
A commonly pretty face, some skill with styling her hair and doing her makeup. Perhaps it wasn’t strange that Twilight saw something in her. It was surprising that she had seen enough to think it worth asking such a nervous mare out on a date, but still, it was something.
But of course, that could never last. Fluttershy was not smart like Twilight was, she was not brave like Rainbow, not fun like Pinkie, nor outgoing like Applejack, and she certainly wasn’t breathtaking in every way like Rarity was. Fluttershy was average in some ways, and disappointing in others. It was a miracle Twilight had even wanted a second date.
Well, it didn’t matter anyway. The date had been horrible, there was no doubt about that. They had tried things out, and now Twilight knew better. The only thing left for Fluttershy to hope for was that things wouldn’t be too awkward the next time they saw one another.
‘Yeah, right. I probably messed that up too… Maybe it’s better if I just leave her alone from now on, then she can find someone else to be happy with…’
And really, wasn’t that better for both of them? Twilight would be happier if she found someone else, and then Fluttershy wouldn’t have to worry about dragging someone as good as Twilight down.
Fluttershy shook her head to try to try to clear the intrusive thoughts. What was she even doing in front of the mirror anyway? It had been a trying night, and she was better off putting it behind her.
Not that the thoughts stopped. She left the bathroom and walked up the stairs, but with each step came a new thought about how she messed everything up, or how she was doomed to be alone, or how somepony like her didn’t even deserve to be happy.
Halfway up the stairs, a knock on the door pulled her from her thoughts. It was only a moment’s reprieve though, simply trading her insecurity at her love life for anxiety at the thought of why someone would come to see her so late.
“Yes?” Fluttershy called as she walked back down the stairs.
She was not prepared for the voice that answered. “Fluttershy, it’s Twilight. Can I, er, talk to you?”
Fluttershy paused at the bottom of the steps. What could Twilight want? Did she decide to get it out of the way, to tell Fluttershy that things weren’t working now so they didn’t have to sleep with things left unfinished?
Her anxiety rising rapidly, Fluttershy crossed the room and answered the door. Twilight stood on the other side, eyes pointed down even once Fluttershy was before her.
“Hello, Twilight. I, uhm, I didn’t expect to see you so soon.”
Twilight closed her eyes and took a deep breath. She kept her eyes shut as she spoke, her voice calm and deliberate. “I… I’m sorry. I know tonight was a really really bad date…”
It was good that Twilight had her eyes closed; the word ‘date’ caused Fluttershy to blush. “Oh. It, uhm, it wasn’t that bad…”
Twilight opened her eyes and gave a small smile. “It’s okay, you don’t have to pretend. I just, well… I really wanted to say that I hope you’ll give me another chance. I know tonight probably hasn’t given you much reason to look forward to another date with me, but I know I can get it right next time!”
Not for the first time during the night, Fluttershy’s only answer was silence. This time, however, it was because her mind had gone blank. Twilight wanted to try again? And… thought she had been the reason the date was bad?
Twilight’s expression slowly went from hopeful to anxious. “I… I understand if you don’t want to… But will you at least consider it?”
Fluttershy blinked a couple of times, then found she still didn’t know what to say. Instead, she stepped aside and stalled for time by asking, “Uhm, would you like to come in? I could make us some tea.”
Twilight’s expression brightened a little as she stepped inside. “I’d love to.”
Fluttershy closed the door behind Twilight then led them to the kitchen. Twilight took a seat at the kitchen table while Fluttershy set about making tea.
Although silence again fell between them, it was much less uncomfortable. Fluttershy busied herself with filling the tea kettle and setting it on the stove, and she used the time to run Twilight’s words through her head.
She still hadn’t figured out what to say by the time Twilight spoke again. “I have no idea what I’m doing. Guess it turns out I’m really bad at this dating thing…”
Fluttershy turned back to find Twilight with her head on the table. She took a seat next to Twilight while the tea steeped. “Not any worse than I am…”
Twilight picked up her head and smiled at Fluttershy. “You’re not the one who asked somepony out and then spent the whole meal not saying anything.”
Fluttershy found herself smiling too, just a little. “Well, maybe I didn’t ask you out, but I didn’t exactly do much to make it a good date…”
“You tried though.” Twilight kept her smile, but she looked down at her hooves. “If nothing else works out then… that already means so much to me.”
Fluttershy blushed and hid behind her mane. “Of course. I… I really wanted things to work out. For… for both of us.”
Twilight wasn’t smiling when she looked back at Fluttershy. “But… but you don’t think it is working, do you?”
“I… I don’t know…” Fluttershy hated the way Twilight looked as she turned away. It was almost enough to make her say that no, she did think things were working, that they should just try again and plan another date.
But the words wouldn’t come. This time the silence brought a cold realization with it. Fluttershy had to tell Twilight the truth. For both of them.
“Twilight, I…” Fluttershy paused when Twilight lifted her head to look at her. She couldn’t bring herself to meet the other mare’s eyes. “Being your friend is really important to me. I… I don’t want anything to change that.”
“Of course,” Twilight answered quickly. “Believe me, that’s the last thing I want. And if… if that’s all you want to be, then I’ll be happy to have a friend as wonderful as you.”
Fluttershy closed her eyes and tried to keep from crying. She couldn’t cry, not now. If she cried, then Twilight would comfort her, and she couldn’t let that happen now. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s… it’s fine.” Twilight’s hoof against her shoulder caused Fluttershy to open her eyes. The sight of Twilight smiling sadly made her want to close them again, but she refused. “It’s okay, Fluttershy. I’m just… Well, thank you for giving me a chance.”
“I… I’m…”
Twilight stood up and looked away. “I should get out of your hair. Good night, Fluttershy.” She stepped forward cautiously and hugged Fluttershy, who barely managed to return it.
Twilight pulled away and walked towards the door. She stopped before reaching it however, distracted by the sudden whistle from the tea kettle.
The sound was enough to snap Fluttershy out of her stupor. She rose from her seat and realized that she was more certain of one thing than she had been of anything else all night: This was no way to end a night with a friend.
“Would, uhm, would you still like to stay for tea?” Fluttershy looked towards Twilight for a moment, but quickly looked away as soon as she made eye contact. “I… I’d like that. If, uhm, if you want to.”
“Of course,” Twilight said, prompting Fluttershy to finally look at her directly. “I’d love to.”
Fluttershy got out two teacups and Twilight filled them before Fluttershy had the chance. She levitated them to the living room, so Fluttershy followed behind her.
They both took a seat on Fluttershy’s couch. Its small size meant they were sitting closer together than they had been at the kitchen table, which felt nice after an evening spent with too much distance between them.
Fluttershy picked up her cup and blew the steam off it while Twilight did the same. As as hard as it had been to get the words out in the kitchen, Fluttershy felt relieved after their talk. Things finally felt a little more normal between them; just two friends enjoying each other’s company, as they had many times before, and as they would many times to come.
“This is nice,” Fluttershy said, really meaning it for the first time that evening.
Twilight nodded. “Yeah. Much better than spending all dinner worrying so much about what to say that I didn’t wind up saying anything.”
Fluttershy giggled. “Yeah, that’s how I felt too.”
Twilight smiled. “I don’t think you had anything to worry about. I mean, it’s not like I’d mind anything you wanted to talk about.”
“You know, I could say the same thing to you.”
Twilight rolled her eyes and took a small sip of her tea. “You could say that, but at least you knew how I feel.”
Fluttershy blushed, and a glance towards Twilight confirmed she was blushing as well. She tested her own tea, which was still hotter than she’d like but cool enough to take small sips. “I did accept, you know. It’s… it’s not like I didn’t want things to work.”
“Oh, I know. It’s just… I know I’m not exactly your first choice.”
It was almost an automatic response. Fluttershy wasn’t exactly sure what she could have done differently, but Twilight was upset, so there was only one thing to say. “I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be.” Twilight’s answer came so quickly that it too felt like an automatic response. “You don’t need to apologize for how you feel. I just… I kept trying to think of what Rarity would do or say, and… well, it all worked so well in my head.”
That was a feeling Fluttershy knew too well. “I never expected you to be like Rarity.”
“I know. It’s dumb, I just…” Twilight laughed, a sound that carried both amusement and sadness. “You know, I even talked to her all day about it. She suggested all sorts of things to say, but then I saw you and it all just… faded away.”
Fluttershy sipped more of her tea. “I had a feeling that you visited Rarity. You, uhm…” Fluttershy pointed her eyes at Twilight’s mane as she trailed off.
That caused Twilight to laugh again. But this time, the sound didn’t hide any negative feelings in it. “I guess it was a bit much, huh?”
“Uhm, just a bit.”
And then they were both laughing. Not the uproarious laughter that would accompany her tea parties with Discord, or even the easy laughter that she was used to with Twilight and her other friends. But it was genuine, both of them finally finding the sense of comfort that they should have had all along.
“I’m sorry, this is probably a really weird conversation,” Twilight said as she used her magic to undo the braid in her mane. Fluttershy suspected they both knew it was the least weird conversation of the evening.
“No, I don’t mind. I’m glad we can talk about it.” Fluttershy smiled and took a few more sips of her tea, finally able to drink it comfortably. “So, uhm, what sort of things do you think we would’ve talked about if we hadn’t been so nervous?”
“Hmm…” Twilight seemed to think of an answer, because she blushed and glanced away. “Well, there is something I kept thinking wanting to say, but… I didn’t know what you would think of it.”
“Oh? What’s that?”
Twilight looked into her tea as she spoke, confessing her secret to it instead of Fluttershy. “I wanted to say… how much I love just being with you. And… that I was looking forward to doing more things around town with you.”
Fluttershy couldn’t help but giggle. “You were afraid of saying that?”
“Hey, don’t laugh!” Twilight said, even though she herself was barely holding back her own laughter.
“I’m sorry, it’s just…” Fluttershy shook her head. “That’s so silly. Of course I’d like to do things with you.”
Twilight’s smile was wide and held a happiness that Fluttershy couldn’t place the source of until she spoke. “Even now?”
Fluttershy blushed as she realized what she’d said. But… she didn’t have to think long to realize she’d meant it. “Yes. Even now.”
They both smiled as they drank their tea. Twilight finished hers first, setting her cup on the coffee table. As she did, she noticed the book sitting on it and levitated it closer for a better look.
“ ‘Disharmony: The Lives and Times of the Witches of Gloom Volcano’,” Twilight read aloud. She turned to Fluttershy and smiled. “I heard this is really good, but I haven’t gotten to read it yet.”
“Me either,” Fluttershy said. “I tried starting it earlier, but I was, uhm, a little too anxious to focus.”
Twilight opened the book and flipped past the first pages, stopping at the start of the prologue. “You know…” She smiled sheepishly. “I used to read out loud to Spike when he was younger. I’m pretty good at it.”
Fluttershy caught on and smiled. “Oh yeah? Hmm, maybe you could read some of it for me now then?”
Twilight beamed. “I’d love to.”
She took a deep breath and started reading, and it wasn’t long before she was as enthralled in telling the story as she was in reading it. It was surprising that she hadn’t read it before, given how effortlessly she fell into the role of the narrator.
The characters came to life as Twilight read them, each with their own distinct voice. But Twilight didn’t stop there. Her expression changed to match each scene, with Twilight practically becoming a one-mare show. She even mirrored actions as best she could from the couch, making gestures with her hooves.
The more she read, the less Fluttershy could imagine the story any other way. By the time the prologue was done, she’d decided that she would just have to ask Twilight to keep coming back to read more until they finished the book.
Fluttershy scooted a little closer. “Uhm, maybe you could read the first chapter too?”
Twilight smiled and nodded, then continued to read. And the more she read, the more Fluttershy was pulled in. And when the first chapter ended with a cliffhanger, well, they couldn’t just leave the story there.
She only stopped reading once. She had reached a scary part and was mimicking the character Draggle’s fear. Fluttershy found herself so enthralled in the story that she wished she could’ve been there to hold Draggle’s hoof. She settled for Twilight’s instead.
Twilight face briefly shifted from the character’s fear to her own surprise. She looked at Fluttershy, who just held tighter. “Uhm, please keep going.”
With a nod, Twilight continued. As Fluttershy scooted even closer, Twilight draped a wing over her back. Pressed against her side, Fluttershy could no longer see Twilight’s expression clearly, but it shone through her voice just fine. She closed her eyes and imagined the story unfolding as Twilight read on.
Had Twilight’s voice always been so soothing? Even as she voiced mean or scary characters, there was something about Twilight’s voice that made Fluttershy forget everything else. She wasn’t worried that she was holding another mare’s hoof. She wasn’t worried about being so close to her. She wasn’t worried about what anypony would think, about anything that could go wrong, about how she might mess things up again.
For as long as Twilight read, Fluttershy didn’t worry about anything at all.
“Fluttershy?”
Fluttershy opened her eyes to see the room was much darker. She looked around in confusion and noticed that the room was dark aside from starlight coming in through the window and a soft glow from Twilight’s horn. “Did I doze off?”
“Yeah,” Twilight said softly. She levitated a book back to the table, and Fluttershy realized it was a different one than she’d been reading before. “I hope you don’t mind I started reading another one of your books. I didn’t want to keep reading ‘Disharmony’ once I realized you were asleep.”
The low light obscured Fluttershy’s blush. “Oh, I’m sorry. You could’ve woken me up.”
“I know, but… I wanted to let you sleep a little.”
Twilight still had her hoof around Fluttershy’s and a wing draped across her back. Without the story to distract her, Fluttershy couldn’t keep a few worries about how close they were from creeping into her mind, but they were fewer than she would have expected.
Even more surprising, any concerns were drowned out by a much more prominent thought. Fluttershy didn’t want it to stop. Twilight was so warm against her, and Fluttershy felt safe under her wing.
“Things have been so confusing…” Fluttershy said quietly. “So much has changed lately.”
“Maybe a little,” Twilight said, matching Fluttershy’s soft tone. “But… maybe some change isn’t so bad now and then.”
Fluttershy leaned her head against Twilight’s shoulder. “Maybe… maybe you’re right.”
“Do you…” Twilight stopped and was silent for a moment, then continued even quieter. “Do you think that maybe… when you’ve had a little more time to get used to things… maybe we could try again?”
“I think… I think I don’t ever want you to not be my friend. And… and I don’t think I like, uhm, dating so much.”
“Oh. Okay…”
“But…” Fluttershy pressed even closer to Twilight, letting herself be comforted by her presence. “Maybe… maybe we could also be marefriends?”
Twilight pulled back a little to look at Fluttershy. “Really?”
Fluttershy blushed, but made herself look into Twilight’s face anyway. “I… I think I’d like that. But maybe… maybe we could do more stuff like this than going out on dates? If, uhm, if that’s okay.”
“I think that sounds perfect.”
Fluttershy smiled, then ignored her embarrassment to lean her head against Twilight again. After a moment, Twilight responded in turn, resting her head on Fluttershy’s.
It wasn’t that Fluttershy didn’t have doubts. She knew that she would probably find some reason to regret this decision, and then she’d bounce back to being happy about it, and then back to her doubts. She just hoped that when she finally figured out how she really felt, it would be just like this. The feeling that no matter what else happened, she would be safe and happy in Twilight’s embrace.
“So, uhm…” Twilight said sheepishly. “If we’re marefriends, then would it be okay if I kissed you?”
Fluttershy blushed, but she smiled all the same. “I… I think that might be okay.”
They pulled apart a bit to look at one another, and Fluttershy almost lost her nerve. But as Twilight leaned in, Fluttershy closed her eyes and smiled.
Their first kiss had been an unexpected impulse of Fluttershy’s, something she did to see what would happen more than anything. After the fact, she found she could barely remember it; there had been little to remember, just a brief second of her lips touching Twilight’s, then embarrassment.
This time was different. Slower. Fluttershy felt how soft Twilight’s lips were against her own, and warmth spread through her face before they pulled away.
Even when the kiss was over, they lingered for a moment as they looked at each other. No words were said, none were needed. When Fluttershy looked into Twilight’s eyes, she saw everything she needed to. She saw the excitement at their second kiss, but also the confidence that things could work. That she would be there to support Fluttershy through whatever may come from their relationship. That Fluttershy didn’t have to be alone anymore.
It was with that in mind that Fluttershy turned away and said, “It’s, uhm, it’s getting pretty late, isn’t it?”
“Oh!” Twilight’s head shot up. “I’m keeping you from bed when you have to be up in the morning…”
Fluttershy blushed. “It, uhm, it’s already dark out. And you live all the way across town…”
“Don’t worry about that. There’s plenty of moonlight to see by, and it’s Ponyville. What’s the worst that could happen?”
Fluttershy had to smile at how Twilight didn’t seem to pick up on what she was implying at all. It was kind of cute. “Maybe, but uhm… I still hate to think about you walking home at night by yourself.”
“That’s sweet of you, but really, there’s nothing to worry about.”
Fluttershy giggled and looked up at her clueless marefriend. “Twilight?”
“Yeah?”
“Would you like to stay the night?”
“Would I… Oh!” Twilight blushed and looked away, grinning. “If, uhm, if you don’t mind I wouldn’t mind. Or, well, I’d do more than not mind I’d really really love that! Er, but only if you want me to, I mean, I hate to intrude and I understand if you’d rather I just left, and –”
Fluttershy kissed her cheek, which stopped Twilight’s rambling. Fluttershy giggled at the effect. “Twilight, it’s okay. I’d love for you to stay the night.”
“That… that sounds nice.” Twilight glanced around. “I guess it is getting pretty late. We should probably get to sleep.”
“Okay.” Fluttershy nodded, but didn’t get up. She decided to stall, just a bit. “I can make us breakfast in the morning.”
It didn’t seem like Twilight minded staying up just a bit longer. “You don’t have to do that.”
“I know, but… I think it could be nice.”
“Well, you won’t hear me complaining. And then I can help you with the animals, if you want.”
“Oh, I couldn’t ask you to do that…”
“Well…” Twilight grinned. “I think it could be nice.”
Fluttershy giggled. “Okay, you win. Thank you, Twilight.”
“I’m looking forward to it.”
Fluttershy gave a small sigh of contentment, then pulled away. “I guess we should get to sleep then.”
Twilight nodded. “Alright. Do you have an extra pillow and blanket I could use?”
Fluttershy hesitated for a moment. Of course she did, but she was tempted to offer a different suggestion; that maybe they could just share Fluttershy’s bed.
The thought even surprised herself, and she didn’t dare say it out loud. Instead, she stood up and said, “Of course. I’ll be right back.”
Fluttershy climbed the stairs to her bedroom. She ducked into her closet and pulled out a blanket and pillow, making sure to grab good ones for Twilight. By the time she was back downstairs, Twilight was lying across the couch.
It made her feel a little guilty. Fluttershy’s couch wasn’t very big, and although both mares could sit on it comfortably, a full-grown pony wouldn’t have much room to lie on it. And as an alicorn, Twilight was larger than most full-grown ponies were.
Twilight didn’t look like she minded much, though. She smiled as Fluttershy approached, sitting back up to take the blanket and pillow.
“Do you need anything else?” Fluttershy asked as Twilight lay back down.
“No, I’m fine here. Thank you, Fluttershy.”
“You’re welcome.” Fluttershy stepped towards the stairs. “Good night.”
“Good night.”
Fluttershy climbed the stairs smiling. Their second date may not have been all it could’ve been at first, but the night had more than turned itself around.
She stopped at the top of the stairs and placed a hoof to her smiling lips. She may not have remembered their first kiss very well, but she doubted she would ever forget their second. After years of assuming she would never get to have a special somepony of her own, Fluttershy somehow had a marefriend who made her happy.
‘Marefriend…’
Fluttershy’s lips fell to a frown at the word. She had been the one to use it first. At the time, it hadn’t felt like a big deal; it was just what they were, after all. But thinking of it now, it reminded her of the whole reason she always felt so insecure about dating someone in the first place.
Twilight was a mare. For years, Fluttershy had reminded herself that she wasn’t supposed to think about other mares like that, and yet, now she was dating one.
Fluttershy collapsed on the bed. It wasn’t like she thought it was bad for a mare to like other mares. There was more than one same-sex couple in Ponyville, and Fluttershy had never been anything but happy for them. It was just… that was them, and this was herself.
‘Why should it matter? It’s okay to be happy I have a marefriend,’ Fluttershy told herself. She wasn’t sure how much she believed that.
The feeling of safety she had felt with Twilight’s embrace was gone. In its place, she had fear at what other ponies might think. Instead of the comfort she had felt at listening to Twilight’s voice, she had unwelcome thoughts creep in. Instead of the softness of Twilight’s touch, she had only an empty bed.
Even knowing Twilight was right downstairs didn’t help much. Fluttershy found herself wishing she had asked Twilight to share her bed…
‘Just need to go to sleep. Things will be better in the morning.’
Although she shut her eyes and tried her best to get comfortable, Fluttershy only tossed and turned restlessly. She had fallen asleep without even trying while Twilight had been reading to her, but now that she wanted to sleep, she seemed further from it than ever.
All the while, the thoughts continued.
‘I should never have brought up being marefriends again.’
‘I’m just bringing her down with me.’
‘She deserves to be with someone who likes her the way she likes me.’
‘I don’t deserve someone as wonderful as her anyway…’
The thoughts echoed through her head, and each one brought half a dozen others with it. There were so many thoughts, and they all felt so big. They filled her head until there was no room left for any positive thoughts she might have used to replace them.
It grew to the point where Fluttershy couldn’t stay in bed. No matter how tired she would be in the morning, she had to get up and wait for her thoughts to dissipate before she even tried sleeping. Otherwise, all she could expect was another restless night and more nightmares.
If only she could get that feeling back. The way she felt when she had been with Twilight, safe and warm. That was what she needed, that would get rid of the thoughts.
She turned towards the stairs. It was hard to see with only the moonlight through her window; the light from Twilight’s horn was gone, as she had no doubt gone to sleep.
Not wanting to wake her by walking on the hardwood floor, Fluttershy flapped her wings and lifted gently into the air. She fluttered over to the stairs and hesitated at the top. She gulped down her nerves and quietly flew to the bottom.
She didn’t land until she was over the living room rug, not wanting her hooves to touch down on wood. She slowly walked to the couch, where she could just make out Twilight sleeping soundly.
Although she knew it wasn’t something she should do, Fluttershy carefully climbed onto the couch. She was glad that it was so dark. She didn’t want to be seen.
Twilight stirred at the couch’s sudden new occupant. “Fluttershy?”
Fluttershy crawled closer before answering. The small size of the couch meant that she was already perched over Twilight, almost standing right on top of her. “Is, uhm… is it okay if I stay here with you for a bit?”
Twilight tried to sit up, but she couldn’t quite manage it with Fluttershy over her. Instead, she shifted to give Fluttershy as much room as possible. “Of course. Is everything okay?”
“I… Yes.” Fluttershy nestled in against Twilight, who wrapped a wing and foreleg around her. “Everything’s fine now.”
Twilight gently stroked Fluttershy’s mane. “Alright. But you know, I’m always here if you need me. I’m happy to help with anything.”
Fluttershy nuzzled against Twilight’s chest. There it was. Everything would be okay as long as she had Twilight to hold her. “I know.”
What more could Twilight do for her? This feeling was already more wonderful than she could imagine. It was silly. Twilight was only a friend just weeks ago, and she had been so sure they wouldn’t work out even earlier that night.
But at that moment, held against her as she felt the rhythmic rise and fall from the other mare’s breathing, she felt something she hadn’t expected at all. “I… I love you, Twilight.”
Twilight’s body went stiff for a moment, then she held Fluttershy tighter. “I love you too, Fluttershy.”
Even then, Fluttershy knew love might not be the right word. But she loved the way she felt with Twilight, and that was enough for her. “Good night, Twilight.”
“Good night, Fluttershy. Sleep well.”
For once, Fluttershy suspected she might be able to do just that.
Stats
Page generated in 0.029 seconds
Total duration
1,001 users online
1,529,336 hits today, 2,054,621 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
I have to keep reminding myself that this one DOESN'T all end in tears. Lookin forward to the new content, it didn't even occur to me until I went back and looked at the chapters but wow, we really didn't get to see much of their early relationship. Well, I'm excited to see it now, i need me some adorableness after all of the sad that is in Playing House.
Edit: Even if I love the sad that is Playing House all the same.
9708297
Haha yeah, I won't promise this to be a completely happy ride, but there's a fair amount of early relationship cutesy fluff to keep things positive. That was why I didn't write this back in the day; I didn't feel confident in doing early relationship development.
Hope it works as a good break from the nonstop drama that is Playing House
When I first saw this I thought it should be one sentence and that was two by accident, but now I see that it works both ways... ish I think it works better as one sentence myself.
Will the fact that Spike was left alone at the castle without Twilight telling him she won’t be home that night be addressed next chapter? Yes he’s been left alone for days in the show but it seemed rude to not tell him she would be staying round Fluttershy’s.
Regardless you have a talent for getting people invested in the stakes of a situation even when we know the outcome, you somehow have me still on the edge of my seat
I was trying to figure out why the second date was going so badly on Twilight’s end and when it was revealed that it was in part because she was trying to act like she imagined Rarity would, because Fluttershy has feelings for Rarity, it felt underwhelming and out of character then I remembered that Twilight had decided that she only had Rarity to help her with relationship advise and being around her would constantly remind Twilight of Fluttershy’s crush. And it was only her second date ever (not counting the dance with flash) it’s okay that she forgot the whole just be yourself thing. Really, it’s good to see her learn as she goes.
9709174
And in addition to it only being her second date, this is her first formal date; the last one was an event with tons of other ponies that they were already going to anyway, just going to it together. Twilight getting caught up in the proper way to date (and not realizing there isn’t one) and looking for inspiration from a pony who’s better at that kind of thing than she is sounds very Twilight to me lol
It’s good to hear the tension is still there, even when you’ve read the rest of the story
I, er... no, I never wound up bringing that back up
A disastrous date to a really sweet evening together. Adorable. And I'm sure you know that reading is one of the nicest things I can think of doing together, either as friends or as a couple.
I'm seeing a lot of parallels between Pony Fluttershy and your Human Fluttershy from other stories in this series. Both in their anxieties and in how they think about things. And at the same time I'm also definitely seeing the differences.
9709174
Journey before destination.
9747551
I’m really glad to hear you see the differences, that’s one thing I always worry about. I try to make them distinct, but sometimes I wonder how well I do on that... And yes, reading together is just fantastic
9747551
“I’m like a dog chasing a car, I don’t know what I’m going to do if I catch up.”
-The Joker
Yup the journey is indeed exciting.
I would go into how and why the fluttershys are different but you know spoilers are a thing.
Ugh!!!! So!!! Awkward!!!!!!
Is this what it feels like when people aren't completely open with their feelings right off the bat?
Which is to say, always??
I love how hard it is to read through this
Not!!!!! That!!! Way!!!
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
;_____;
10665697
Honestly same
GOD. THEYRE CUTE.
Okay so I might have completely mentally blocked out the beginning of this chapter just because it was so awkward. But it really makes the payoff worth it. I was squirming at the adorableness at the end there. God, i wish I had someone to cuddle with sometimes
Ah well, I'll live vicariously through the characters in this series
tism
I was cringing so hard during the "date." How could they go from being best friends to this?! In my head, I was screaming for them to just be honest with each other. I was so happy when they did just that. It's funny how the conversation about how awkward the date was was less awkward than every conversation during the date!
I was wondering how the date could've possibly gone so wrong, but amazingly you made it all make sense. Twilight was anxious about doing the date properly and ended up not saying anything, and Fluttershy was anxious about ruining things for Twilight and ended up not saying anything. Twilight trying to be like Rarity and attempting to follow Rarity 's advice to the T didn't help either. I must say, you write Fluttershy's pessimistic perspective extraordinarily well. Fluttershy in this story thinks there's nothing great about herself, that she's bound to ruin everything, and they nothing will go her way. You conveyed that sentiment so well that I was honestly convinced that the situation was beyond saving. And then the moment the two of them were honest with each other, it was like a flip was switched and they were back to being the best friends that we all know and love.
During the date, I was thinking how it obviously wasn't going well because both Twilight and Fluttershy weren't the type to enjoy such formality. I was relieved to find out later that Twilight chose this approach because she was following Rarity's advice to the T. As a side note, I heard somewhere that it's better to sit next to your date rather than across from them so that it's less anxious and more intimate. Twilight certainly could've learned that! In fact, that's kind of like when they were reading together on the couch. Fluttershy's comment about not wanting to date but wanting to be marefriends was exactly my thoughts put into words. I always thought the term "dating" sounded so deliberate and forceful when they're just hanging out with a little more intimacy.
Well, I'm glad Twilight learned an important lesson early on and that the chapter ended on such a high and adorable note. I love the buildup towards Fluttershy's "I love you," as it's not the typical throwaway line or instant realization. Instead, it has a lot of weight behind it, as we see through her thoughts and perspective. I never thought I would enjoy reading a chapter in the perspective of someone with such a sad view on each day, but you've magically made it enjoyable and charming.
Lastly, Twilight being oblivious to Fluttershy's offer to stay over was hilarious! It was in character for Twilight and also a moment in which Fluttershy was in control for once. I was a little disappointed when Twilight still didn't get it and asked for a blanket, but you didn't let me down! Fluttershy fluttered downstairs for her prize after all.
Oh oblivious little Twilight. The parts about Twilight comforting Fluttershy were incredibly cute.