Chapter Twenty Four
Beyond the World's End
An example of how traveling
can broaden one's event-horizons.
April 29th, 1015 (January 23rd, 5871, Local Δt+0.7%)
The Everfree Citadel, Equestria r300.79, θ-0.891, φ24.56
I took a sip of my tea and began summing up. "So you see, it was a bit like stumbling while walking down a steep slope. I instinctively tried to get my hooves under me, and that only led to increasing my speed and worsening my hope of recovery, and after several iterations of that, I was galloping full-tilt down the mountain, with no hope of avoiding a serious crash."
"I am well acquainted with the phenomenon," my hostess said, chuckling. "You seem to have recovered fairly well."
"It took some time… but yes, things worked out okay. Fortunately, I have very understanding friends." I took another drink of tea, and Princess Twilight Sparkle floated the pot over to refill my cup.
It's always a bit weird meeting myself, and this version was no different, even though she had arranged to meet me in her library and was very polite and well-mannered. It was the significant time displacement that made her seem so odd, I suppose. She was taller than Luna, and quite striking in appearance. Not beautiful in the classic sense, she was far too lean and her face too angular for that, but quite imposing, nonetheless. I suppose it had been too much to hope for that I'd look more like Celestia as I aged.
Even though she wore a bejeweled peytral that positively reeked of powerful magic, my preliminary investigation into her universe had led me to conclude that she was solidly in the Kindly Guardian category,[1] so I felt I could be open with her about my history. The fact that she had a young dragon and a changeling as her assistants was also a good sign.
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[1] My spreadsheet, unfortunately, had several unpleasant designations such as Tyrant Queen, Mad Wizard, Nightmare Twilight, and Midnight Sparkle. (Yes, those last two might seem nearly synonymous, but there are some fine distinctions to be made.)
----------
"So…" Princess Twilight lifted a tea cake in her aura and turned it slightly, as if examining it for flaws. "What of the Red Queen that is imprisoned in the heart of the world… the heart of my world, I suppose I should say?"
"The wards that Luna and Celestia built are fine. They'll last forever unless you mess with them. And don't do that unless you want to turn your world into a nightmarish alicorn-factory!" I shuddered. "I managed to get a glimpse of the higher-order universe, and it makes Tartarus look like a beachside resort."
"Conflict, then? Alicorns for troops?" she asked with a tilt of her head. "Or worse?"
"Worse," I said and shivered. "Fuel might be the closest concept, but that universe operates on such different rules, it's hard to understand the simplest parts of it. A few glimpses were more than enough for me."
Princess Twilight took a delicate bite of her cake, chewed thoughtfully, and swallowed. "If you don't use the higher world for transit, how is it that you're able to travel between universes at this level? Is there some sort of direct lateral connection?"
It always came to this. Cruel or benign, wise or foolish, I hadn't yet encountered a universe where I was stupid. "I'd like to get to know you quite a bit better before I tell you that," I said, watching her carefully to observe how she would take my refusal.
She smiled, and thankfully it was an understanding smile.
Her companions didn't react as well. The dragon didn't say anything, but she hissed through her teeth and scored the tabletop with her claws as she glared at me over the top of her glasses.
The changeling thumped the table with a hoof and swore. "Oh come on! You've had a look-see at this place, and you know that the Princess ain't got nothin' but good intentions!"
Twilight lifted a hoof. "Please, girls. It's alright. She's only being cautious, and that's quite understandable."
I grinned apologetically at her. "I'd like to talk with you about the way you've organized things here in your world. It seems like I could learn a lot from you."
The changeling wasn't quite done with her rant. "You little half-pint princess! You think she oughta give you all the secrets she worked so hard on without you willin' to share yours? You admitted that you durn near broke yer universe, an' you think that—"
Twilight laid a gentle wingtip on the changeling's back to silence her. "It's fine, Marigold. Besides…" She turned back to me and smiled ever so slightly. "Now that I know that it's possible, I should be able to figure out the details on my own."
Oh sun and moon, she was one of the clever ones.
After she had studied my reaction for a long moment, she changed the subject slightly. "So you say that the alterations to the universal mechanisms are… inelegant?"
I nodded slowly, collecting my thoughts. "Yes… remarkably well-done, considering that Celestia and Luna did all the work from the inside while they were struggling up the time gradient as quickly as possible, trying to get back to Equestria. But they're still flawed and need to be repaired… or replaced."
"I take it you don't agree with some of the reasoning behind the alterations?"
"Well, I'm not entirely convinced—"
"That's why you're traveling. You're collecting data on variant universes to determine the optimal way to make repairs… and possible changes."
"That's part of it, but—"
"Also, you're compiling a threat assessment of the neighboring worlds." Twilight fixed me with a piercing gaze.
'I… uhmn…"
The changeling threw back her head and laughed. "Face it, shorty, you are out-classed!"
The dragon emitted a burst of sibilant laughter that left wisps of steam floating in the air above the table.
"See?" the changeling continued. "Ol' slither-britches agrees with me, an' we don't hardly agree on nuthin'!"
I was seconds away from activating my portal gem when Princess Twilight frowned and broke eye contact with me. "Please excuse me, Twilight. I can be inappropriately intense at times."
The changeling opened her mouth to speak, but the Princess silenced her with a slight motion of a wingtip. "Marigold, Cutter, please return to your duties. I will continue my discussion with our visitor alone."
They bowed to her and left the room, the changeling giving me a quiet, "Nice meetin' ya, short-stuff!" as she went by.
When they had gone, the Princess dabbed at her lips with her napkin and set it down beside her saucer, folding it neatly. "Can we be honest and direct with each other?"
"I'd prefer it," I said. Before she could continue, I added, "That's why you sent them away, isn't it? They wouldn't understand. They might take bluntness for hostility."
She looked up from the table and grinned. "As you say."
I nodded. "Good. So… bluntness." I took a deep breath. "I admire a lot of what you've done with your world. It's very peaceful and the various peoples are generally happy and prosperous. It is what I would call... disorderly, but since it seems that factor is a result of maximizing personal freedom, I can't come up with a specific objection. But I couldn't help noticing…" My mouth went a bit dry, but I soldiered on. "You're the only alicorn here. Ponies seem to think that Celestia and Luna are goddesses or legends, and I haven't seen any sign of Discord at all. That concerns me."
She looked away, and her long neck curved downward. "It is a long and complex story, but if I have to give you a short explanation…" She looked up at me and sighed. "They got tired of arguing with me."
"Then this world is not the result of a consensus," I said, hoping she would elaborate but not wanting to pressure her.
She stood and gestured with a wing. "Come. Let's go out onto the balcony."
I preceded her onto the wide platform that clung to the side of the huge tower. I looked down over the railing at the enormous dragon circling its base. "It's hard to believe he's gotten so big. I wish he was awake."
The Princess joined me at the edge and followed my gaze. "Spike sleeps most of the time now. It will be another couple of centuries before he stirs again, unless he is disturbed. How big is he in your world?"
I held out a wing. "About this high, and that's standing on his hind legs."
She shook her head. "It is hard for me to imagine him that small, though I know he was. Does he still ride on your back?"
I smiled. "Yes. All the time."
She smiled too, though it was a wistful one. "He will return the favor when his wings come in." She looked back down at him. "He will be faithful to you, always."
I didn't know what to say, so I said nothing.
A few moments later, she stepped back from the railing and pointed up at the sun. "There is an answer for you. Look closely."
I did. I opened my magical sight and saw, within the sun's boundary...
"Celestia…" Not imprisoned within the sun, but there, nonetheless.
"We are immortal, but not unaging," Twilight said to me. "We grow in ways that are mysterious even to ourselves. Celestia tends to a realm I am not yet able to perceive." She lowered her head and let her wing fall. "A realm I have no place in."
"I'm sorry," I said. It was pure reflex. After I'd blurted it out, I cringed, realizing the ways it could be taken as patronizing or insincere.
The Princess shrugged it off and shuffled her long wings neatly at her sides. "It is how things are, not how things will always be."
"Luna is…?"
"In the moon, yes, and she still visits the dreams of ponies from time to time."
She gave no indication that Luna meant anything more to her than did Celestia, but that was a subject I was not going to broach. It wasn't exactly a situation that made me happy, but it did make me feel more comfortable with trusting her. "Well, that leaves Discord," I said, trying to sound cheerful.
"Ah, yes… Discord." She nodded. "I killed Discord long ago."
"Y—you what?"
"He became a serious threat, and I had to protect my subjects."
"But… but… There had to have been something… another way…"
She looked away from me and studied the sky over the snow-covered forest. "He was never as close a friend to me as he seems to be in your world. He only loved Fluttershy, and when she died, he… well, describing it as 'going mad' is hardly adequate."
My guts knotted up. Yes, I could believe that her Discord had relapsed, but combined with the mention of Fluttershy… "Didn't you even try—"
She turned abruptly and went back into the tower with a sharp, "Come."
I was left with the choice of following her or leaving the world and checking it off my list. I bit down on the inside of my cheek, and followed.
We descended a broad spiral staircase and emerged into a rotunda with an arched roof. Statues of my close friends were set in a circle around the center of the room. I checked them with a brief pulse of magic, and they were indeed just statues. They all wore golden tiaras, shoes, and necklaces.
"The gems…" I began. The stones set into the necklaces were seething with magical energy. Complex matrices intertwined with active mandalas and thaumic nodes and other structures I had no terms for. I had never seen such intricate and masterful work before.
The Princess reached out and placed the frog of her right forehoof on the gem set into Pinkie Pie's necklace. Her eyes went wide… and blue.
"Omigosh! Another Twilight? An Alternate Universe Twilight?" Princess Twilight was speaking, but it was definitely Pinkie's voice coming from her mouth. "We have to give her a Welcome to the Universe party! We haven't had one of those in ages!"
Princess Twilight removed her hoof from the gems and her eyes darkened back to normal. "We took different approaches to the problem of mortality, it seems," she said. She nodded toward the statue of Fluttershy. "Discord is in there with her, if you'd like to talk with him."
I took a step back. "I… I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but that seriously creeped me out."
She frowned. "They are part of me." Her horn lit. And the five small white stars of her cutie mark glowed brightly. "I could no more let them go than I could erase these."
"But… but is it really them in there?" I had taken another step back without realizing it.
"As much as your Pinkie Pie is the same Pinkie you had lunch with last week."
I considered it for a while. "I don't know if that—"
"I have no interest in debating it. I settled the matter to my satisfaction thousands of years ago, and whatever thoughts you have about it will not change my mind. If you wish to speak with Discord and inquire as to his satisfaction with this arrangement, I can call him forth for you. If not, perhaps we can go on to negotiating an exchange of information."
Her sudden impatience and brusque manner confused me for a moment until I noticed the tears welling up in the corners of her eyes. "No," I said. "No, that's fine." I looked over my shoulder at the staircase. "Perhaps we could have a little more tea while we talk?"
When I turned back to her, she was perfectly composed once more, her mane and tail stirring gently in the still air of the room. "Of course. Would you like more sweets? Or perhaps some sandwiches?"
I forced a smile. "Yes, sandwiches would be nice."
I was going to have to come up with an entirely new category for my spreadsheet.
= = =
=
"We're here at the ending, but...
We're here together, so I don't mind."
Oh. Oh! Is that so. Really and truly?
It always seems like such a short time, after it is over.
Oooh. I'd wondered how "The Quest"'s Twilight would fit in. :) Hehe, chilling.
...I don't think you really get close to showing what's so disturbing about "The Quest" 's Twilight, (and I don't just mean the most obvious one,) but fair enough keeping it to what's here. It's a weird thing for her to do at the end there, but it's not exactly 'good intentions with bad results', I guess.
I feel insulted. I'm not THAT horrible!
I thought she and her assistants seemed familiar. Now I know why.
Misspelled "definitely" there.
7191665
So you missed the part where Epona isnt a god? No more than Twi was god of the EQG world? Pity.
Well, that is what Twi can become.
But, i think she learn her lesson( about friends and Discord), so i think Twilight of 'that story' will be more 'warm' and 'alive' pony.(persone for people who hate horse pun)
7191858
Darn auto-correct! Thanks!
Ah. Now this was definitely a time when I found the dates useful; until I checked them, I was rather confused. :)
"of tea and Princess Twilight"
"tea, and"?
"a bejeweled petral"
"peytral"?
Quite interesting...
"looked away and her long"
"away, and"?
"would elaborate, but not wanting"
Ought that comma to be there?
"were indeed, just statues"
Ought that comma to be there?
Well now, that was indeed quite interesting, and unexpected! Very nice. :)
I wonder where the story will go from here?
7191946
...And now I'm imagining Gehnlight.
...
Meaning, ah, a universe-voyaging Twilight who also missed that part. Not a ship.
...Aaaaand now my brain is trying to process that ship. Thank you, brain.
7191665
Truly ominpoent/omnisentient beings either have a policy of total non-direct interference; or you never read about them, because there would literally be no story because nothing would ever happen that they diapproved of - they'd just Outside Context away any source of conflict before it could even happen - unless you are talking about some sort of entity that deliberately created a universe to make creatures exist to suffer, but that be equally unentertaining.
Anything less than THAT total omnipotence/omnisentience that is a god in the more mythological sense - "god" by species or category of power, but neither truly all-powerful, nor infallible - and more often that not, unfortunately, complete asshats and basically entitled bullies. (See the gods of Greek or Egyptian mythology, for example.)
Epona may have been effectively a god in terms of power-level, but it (as evidenced) says nothing about her infallibility. She was neither omnipotent nor omniscient.
Hmm. I had always assumed that the Twilight in The Quest was the same Twilight as in this trilogy, and that she was going to "fail" at her goal of organizing the planet before eventually secluding herself to observe for millennia before her next attempt.
Oh good. I continue to enjoy this immensely. You may continue.
I had thought that The Quest's Twilight the natural evolution of -this- Twilight, given Pinkie's comments in The Quest. But clearly not ... quite. Unless different iterations of the same universe across time count as different enough to be 'travelled' to.
Which has some strange implications for time travel. (Then again, they say that the future is a different country too...)
7192630
7192763
The "enigmatic" Twilight might well have become the Twilight in the tower. But now that she knows where that path could lead...
7191974
Fix'd, thanks!
7191946 Alondro did apparently miss that, but he does have a bit of a point in his two rants. I'm not sure how he carried it across was the best, but the part about the escalation of threat is rather concerning.
7193150
You're welcome.
7193145 Oh good. Non-linear causation. How fun.
Well. If Twi doesn't want the 'paradise' of this particular path, I wonder where she'll end up.
7196677
Oops! Fix'd, thanks!
In Babylon 5, the opposite to chaos and destructive callousness was shown as a frozen White Queen. Eternal with the knowledge that brings, yes, but also cold, precise and so sure of her perfection that it had washed out all possibility of empathy or compassion towards those who did not share her advantages.
So, yes, Twilight, the opposite of a 'Nightmare' version of you is not necessarily a good queen.
7201741
Nightmare Twilight vs. Midnight Sparkle... when is the election again?
7222041
Just make sure to check the dates at the beginning of each chapter!
Most readers have reacted as the individual chapters went up, and it will be great to get feedback from someone who doesn't have to wait a week (or so) between chapters.
P.S. Zebras are ponies and use the same terminology... stallion, mare, etc.
7222208 Okay, so it's going to jump around a bit. Would have caught on soon enough... I think.
As to Zebras=ponies, well I can see it. Most stories don't do that but it works, so good to know.
Would get another chapter out tonight, but gotta be to work early.
7225361
I am inordinately pleased by reactions like the above.
I'm really enjoying your as-you-go comments, and they're very helpful!
You are correct in supposing that clarifying details will be forthcoming... in another comment, I said that the chapter structure is a lot like Present Twilight playing chess with Future Twilight. Questions and answers tend to alternate.
Oh ghod... my wife pitched for Voyager before it aired, so I know first-hand how screwed up that room was. I didn't realize that it had become a trope, though. Is there a hard-and-fast definition or is it a stand-in for "ignoring the problem?"
7226710 Basically for when the writers would come up with some 'third option' for Janeway to take that totally ignores the actual morale issue around a problem and keeps everything nice and neat and makes sure she does absolutely nothing wrong.
Yeah this wasn't near that level, but still felt a bit to pat and easy.
7226446
Yeah, I'm a huge Tom Jones fan; so sue me!
7226446
I will admit that the disguise amulets are congruent to the Star Trek transporters/universal translators ; a techno-babble gimmick to speed things up and eliminate a lot of non-plot verbiage. (And I'm not sorry... not even a little bit! )
7226800
E-gad! I'm having to (metaphorically) bite my lip to avoid spoilers by commenting on things like these. Let's just say I'm looking forward to your future reactions. Also, doing "absolutely nothing wrong" is not a theme of this book!
7227228
Don't be it does work well and is a rather clever way to do this. It does make sense and works really well overall. Like I said just felt incomplete and a bit to clearly meant for that effect without a good in story reason. I'd just say tweak it for Twi to explain the talismans also held a translation spell the would do the whole name substitution as well.
And as to spoilers, well kind of assumed this would come back. Two biggest guesses are she realizes that hey, she's fucking up to, so she can hardly claim to be a perfect arbiter of right and wrong and be the one to decide what is and is not right when she so clearly makes mistakes too and does stupid things like that. OR Pinkie was acting as a conduit for the Wild Magic, and it is trying to push her along this path.
7227994
I hope you realize that I'm going to steal that!
7228098 Well, not like it's really stealing given all the other ideas I keep sharing with you.
7234376
Oh yeah.
7235954
You know... if you are reacting this way at this point in the story, I can't wait until you get a few more chapters in! I hope you like complete train wrecks!
Okay, recovered a bit. That, that was.... at once both horrible, sad, just so... horrible to have happen, and yet, so well done in doing it. Just... yes that was such a well played move that has horrifying, saddening and yet, so skilled in hitting the notes just right. It was sad, a bit dark, but not gratuitous. Having a pony die like this, one Twi cares about, and one the audience has grown attached to was, just, such a heart wrenching and yet narrative perfect move. Give her added emphasis on needing to fix the world, and that ending line.... "Pretending to be okay." It just, it works so well with her overall arc. It sums up so much.
Cause yes Twi is hurting, confused, acting out from all of that, but in ways nopony really notices, shes acting odd yes, but that's nothing new for her. They don't see the real pain, in part because Twilight is barely letting herself see it. And her response to the pirates is.... it manages to be both thrilling at those fucking bastards getting what is coming to them, and terrifying in Twilight going this far, showing just how easily even her best of intentions can turn bad, can lead to her taking steps that are, just horrendous. But justified, to an extent. It's just.. the entire thing is so grey, so morally dubious, so, lacking any 'right answers' that, it's just a near masterpiece of complexity that does so well to set things in motion, to further explore just how bad Twilight is doing, what is driving her, while given the story a huge emotional punch, and now with the rest of the crew captive, and Twilight about to do something REALLY stupid......
So yes this was just so well done, emotional, tense, and leaving with an unsettled feeling, you can't blame Twilight for doing what she did, but at the same time, it is disturbing she did them and, just adds so much, while making sure things ARE serious out here...... yeah, this whole chapter was just brilliant, and I hate you so much for making me have to say that about something so tragic.
7237745
Thank you for that. Your reaction is exactly what I was going for. Honestly, it was a chapter that was hard to write.
7237614
Consider that Twilight may be viewing the changelings as individuals and judging each of them on their own merits rather than applying a race-wide stereotype. Universal approbation is as much racism as condemnation.
Just after two changelings try to burn her alive, another one appears and claims to be a friend. Which response is more logical for her? “Oh, goody, a new friend!” or “Okay... I'll help you for now, but I'm going to be very cautious until I'm sure of you.”
7237872
Yeah, the face-hoof icon is completely inadequate for this chapter. Each further step along the way, her decisions are corrupted by a dark influence on her own personality and desires. She is rationalizing like crazy, but she isn't holding the idiot ball.
7237941 Except she has every reason to not be so suspicious of Ket, she knows she's part of Cscharee's hive, who up till this story has always clearly been somepony Twilight saw as a friend.
Yes her initial reactions in the market place were perfectly justified, (well, mostly, she still went a tad far) I'm talking about her treatment and the wording choices after she got back and was able to prove Ket was allied to who she said she was.
Distrusting any 'ling loyal to Chryssi, yes that is perfectly justified because, well, it's Chrysalis. But just, feels wrong for her to be doing that and treating Csharee and those loyal to her the same way. It just, adds to the very unsettling implications from the very first one about how the only 'good' changelings are ones willing to give up everything about who and what they are to conform to 'normal' pony society. Last time we saw them together, Twilight was comforting the dying Changeling, desperate to save her life, then makes a remark about "Huh I was hoping that would turn her into a normal pony" leaves, and next time she's brought up it's to say "Well, she hasn't attacked Equestria yet" As if, the fact she hasn't become a 'normal' pony, is all the reason Twi needs to stop seeing her as a friend and treat her as a potential enemy who simply hasn't made any moves that would make it certain... yet.
Also yes I do love how, you can see how this all makes sense to Twilight, see the logic. Yes she is wrong, but you can understand why, it's not just her being an idiot. Okay she IS being an idiot, but it's for understandable reasons, I'm just holding off on learning the full scope of her plans before making any more solid judgements on things.
7237982
Which is fine if you ignore what changelings actually are. They aren't ponies, they are parasites at best and arguably predators. Overcoming their own biology may be possible, and that would be laudable and worthy of recognition, but ignoring it is idiocy. Why would ponies ever fully trust creatures that have deceit as a built-in part of their nature and prey on them? Don't forget, in every canon appearance they're universally viscous and hostile,[1] and Rainbow Dash's happy dreams are of kicking the snot out of them. I'm adhering much closer to canon pony attitudes. If anything, I'm being unreasonable in assuming that changelings can overcome their nature and become accepted by ponies, because that idea is completely unsupported by canon.
You obviously have a different view of things, but we are on fundamentally different wavelengths here.
-----------------
[1] With the possible appearance of Kevin in episode 100... and with all the love flowing at a wedding, she was probably only there for the "buffet."
7238067 Except I'm not going off some other idea or interpretation of canon, I'm mostly going off just this story, well series, showing that Changelings are perfectly able to be friends with ponies, don't have to see them as 'prey' are perfectly able to live together with ponies peacefully, set up from the start with Csharee and Sessi's bond with Twi and Jigsaw. Nothing established any of that being some innate part of a changeling being a changeling, that they have to be like that, that's its just their 'nature'. That there is one single thing wrong with them being them. It's just a result of Chrysalis being such a conniving manipulative bitch. Which yes is a distinction that needs to be made. Changelings as individual beings, and changelings as minions of Chrysalis. The later group, yeah they are pretty much never to be trusted, but again that is due to Chryssi being who she is and every, read one, canon appearance of them as a group has been them as minions of Cheese Legs. Which TCC made sure to show, they do not need to be and are capable of going off on their own.
It just, feels so wrong for the story to make such a big deal about how, no, 'lings are not monsters, and ARE just like any other pony, they've simply been guided by an evil bitch for so long. But as individual, are perfectly able to, well be just like other ponies. And yet always treat them as if they are some abomination that needs to change to fit into pony society. And need to never be trusted, even one that you are such close friends with you are heartbroken at the thought of her dying and desperate to do anything to save her. That is where my issues with this stories treatment of them comes from, it is so inconsistent. If they are like you describe them, why did Twilight ever give a crap about Csharee in the first place?
Except, per this very stories own narrative, yes, they ARE ponies. Just ponies who have been altered into a different form via proximity to a powerful magical artifact, just like the Crystal Ponies have been. And, the story established that no, they do not have to be parasites at all. Yes they CAN be, but they do not have to be. Now if we were going with the backstory from the comics, that argument would hold a lot more weight. But with the one for this reality, they ARE ponies.
I just, do not like, in the slightest, how the story at once both tries to portray Changelings as, just like any other pony and able to be just as peaceful, friendly, to simply be ponies who happen to look different. Shows so many examples of this at work, proves beyond a doubt there is not a single thing innate to being a changeling that is actually wrong. And yet, still seems to demonize them for being who they are, and not wanting to give up everything about who and what they are. Again it's like being upset that pegasi don't want to have their wings amputated to join in with all the land bound tribes. And this is just going by how these three stories have portrayed them, not any headcanon.
The facts about what Changelings are that the story has established, just do not mesh with the way the story seems to think they should be treated. And Twilight just comes off like a hypocritical bitch for the way she treats Ket, and especially for tossing her 'friend' Csharee under a bus and acting like she's some threat for no reason then she never became a 'proper' pony, while the story has made clear there is not on innate thing 'wrong' with being a changeling. Beyond most ponies are apparently racist agsint it.
(And Word of God is that 'Kevin' was invited, and he was a friend of Matilda's.)
7239760
WTF? I've got to read that one now!
7240367 OHHHH Yes, it is SUCH an awesome series. It's a prequel, How Equestria was made type deal. Ponies were not the first race to develop on Equiss, that was "the Masters" or as they would come to be known, Diamond Dogs. Who had very high tech global empire, built on the backs of the 'Servitors' (ponies) who were conditioned and magically mentally hobbled so that even the mearest thought of ever displeasing a "Master" would cause pain. Until an experiment results in one young, white coated, pink maned mare having her "Blessing" removed, and is finally able to see the truth about their world, see how cruelly her race is treated, actually think things are wrong.. and together with her darker coated sister, seek to end the suffering and free their entire race.
And yes it is epic. Fusion and Gravity are just amazing (Celestia and Luna before they took those names) and yeah they fight with their namesakes, Gravity using relativistic bullets and, well Gravity. Fusion, bringing forth the full fury of the sun to burn her foes to ash.
7240389
Okay... downloaded and on my kindle. I'll read it next!
7240635
Aren't the traditional entertainments the best?
No kidding? Wow!
Side stories are distinct possibility.
Okay so, now what?
Umm, what?
Ummm, I ask again.... WHAT!?
So, far future..... Twilight is still around, so they worked that out.....
wait.... WHAT! IS this.... is this like, some, Council of Twilight's?
Or, her, just.... seriously, what is going on? Time travel, or just her from an more advanced dimensions.. seriously PLEASE EXPLAIN!
Okay so yes, some Counsel of Twilight's type deal. But is this still OUR Twilight?
And could probably figure those out, but yes differences.
Okay so the one talking is not Our Twilight. Our Twilight set this up? Seeing all those new realities?
Okay looking more and more like our Twilight but, still, where is the immediate "Now what?"
..................................WHAT!? OH HOLY FUCK!!!!!!
Okay, so, she goes from universe to universe now? And, well, I get that, needing to leap up before going down to a separate connected verse, and how does she do it?
Okay, that's reasonable. You know how... touchy.. you can get.
"The Portal to Hell is opened with the incantation of Good Intentions." And that is SO appropriate a phrase for this.
Yup, gotta be careful with those geniuses.
And Twi and the Sister did this for their world? What specifically was wrong?
AHHHHH this would make sense, see how other Celestia and Luna's have done it.
Well this Twilight does have a few centuries on her.
Well she learned one important lesson.
'
That isn't creepy at all.....
Go go Spike.
Just, choosing to live there and let Twilight take over?
Oookay so.. is this... something that WILL happen to Our 'verse as well? Or, something unique to this one?
Good thing you two have patched things up. So yes there ARE ways things can be different.
Oooookay... this is a might bit creepy....
Me too. So what IS going on back in your 'verse Twi?
Okay.... I do get what is going on but.. what the buck happened back in the story!? What about the fallout? Getting stuff fixed? The other Mane 6? Twi's.. everything, just, so many things left that NEED closure. And so many things that... feel un addressed, what happened with the Changelings? Twi's guilt over her actions seems to have been forgotten, she never really came to grips with the whole "You're not the boss of ME!" thing what was wrong with the World? What caused the Elements to act like they did? What was with those crystal growths? What What what WHAT, there are still way TO many things brought up that have not been addressed.
7241924
Next time, on The Twilight Enigma...
But seriously, dude! You've read and commented on a huge chunk of the book today. I honestly thought I might get the next chapter out before you caught up! Epic!
7241965 Well, got to a point I HAD to keep going and see hat came next.
OKay, sleep and way to long work day to process, thoughts overall.... I loved it, best one in the trilogy, however, do have some issues. Going to leave off some of them cuase they are things that hopefully will be addressed in the final chapter, mostly about so many things that feel unfinishes, dangling plot threads, mostly my list from the final chapter comment, but aside from those, a few issues.
First, the Changling thing, yeah gotta talk about that, it's the one most notable, overall, it really isn't THAT bad, it just comes down to a few very poorly worded lines that come off far harsher then they should. (Like calling the talisman that actually ALLOWS Changelings to make friends with having to sacrifice everything about who and what they are an 'anti-friendship' charm, given, as stated, it is the exact opposite of that.) Twilight acting a bit to distrustful and antagonistic towards Ket well after the point she should have no reason to. AND biggest of all to me, how Twilight treats Cshaaree, seemingly totally ignoring everything between them.... I simply cannot see the Twilight from this story weeping over the General's battered body, comforting her as she's dying, willing to try anything to save her. There is not one hint of her actually caring about her friend.
Also the plan to deal with them, yeah already said my piece and did not change. Though one added factor, this also can't be ALL they are doing, just their fail safe, last resort trump card in case Chryssi pulls something, but they better still be working to stop that from happening.
Okay now story itself, not a whole lot I haven't said, biggest two issues are at the start, and ending. The start, well of the 1014 portion, it really does not feel at all believable that Twilight, after all we've seen her do, would be THAT exhausted, THAT drained, just that utterly depleted and magic less after the overall tiny amount we've seen her doing. It did not feel like she did anything near enough to get that drained.
And the ending, the climax... yeah I do have one fairly big issue with this. Now everything we DID get was freaking amazing. My issue is what we did not get. And took me a long time to work out how to phrase this right, so hoepfully it's clear what I men cuase its, one of those things I'm not sure if I am describing right. But the climax was utterly lacking any finale, and weight, any real 'internal climax'. Okay, what has been driving this story, the thread going through, the key has all been an internal conflict, ti's been about the conflict inside of Twilight, her rejection of her responsibilities, her trying to find a way to 'fix' the world, dealing with the lose of her connection to the tree, her fear of losing her friends. Yes there have been a lot of external conflicts too, but all self contained, all a series of events, with the thread connecting them, driving the story and bringing on each conflict was Twi's internal conflict. Yet, the big, final climax, the point where all the conflict in the story reaches it's head..... is totally devoid of any resolution to that internal conflict. All we get is her "Oh my goddess what have I done?" after having the dark magic ripped out of her, but that is so little, deals with nothing she's been going through, and is just her realizing "Hey I do really fucking stupid shit while I'm hopped up on Dark Magic." Something she should have gotten the first damn time she did it.
Now yes the confrontation with the Red Queen was epic, and it was one HELL of an external conflict. It made sense, it flowed well, I am NOT complainng at all about what we got. Just that, without any resolution, without some high climax for all the internal conflicts that have been driving this story too, with no real emotion behind it, no, Twilight overcoming something inside of herself, no, working out some of those internal issues that have driven this entire story it just.. feels..... lacking. It's epic, but not really powerful, there isn't enough real emotional torque from Twilight.
Have her look at the Map, see all the changes Tia and Luna made, see the whole thing, understand it, see the flaws, but also the good, the complexity, come to realize, that yes the world is imperfect but.... that's because there IS no 'perfect' world. That life is to complex to be dealt with like that, have her come to some deeper realization of... SOMETHING before turning on the Queen. Give all the internal conflict an outlet as well. All her pain, fears, rage, grief, everything she's been bottling up, all the things driving her, they need resolution, and without that, after the whole story has been so much about Twi's inner conflicts, the external conflict, while epic, simply feels a bit lacking in the overall context of the story.
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Agreed, and easy to fix.
Yes, Twi's internal conflict (and it's resolution) is the central point of the book. I think you're onto something by moving, or at least indicating, the turning point in her mind to before her confrontation with the Red Queen, but let's revisit this once you've read the final chapter.
7243551 Agreed, I was hoping/expecting the chapter would deal with that, cause again it is a very obvious loose end. So see how that works out. that is just my thoughts after reading the climax itself, was to engrossed in "oh shit! oh shit! on FUCk!....... OH.... Fuck... YES!" to really want to get to into details like that, but it was the one nagging "this isn't quite right" during it to me that it was so external with almsot no internal.
an interesting quote i read somewhere: "to make a perfect society, you would need perfect people."
the closest i've seen to a workable system was in the Lensman stories by Edward E. "doc" Smith: young men were put through numerous tests (a process that took 2 years) to pick out the ones that were completely honest and incorruptible. they were then given absolute authority. but even they needed help from an advanced alien race (millions of years older) to create a symbol of authority that could not be stolen or counterfeited!