Chemistry, Finale
Silver slowly opened his eyes. He felt as though he’d been run through the ringer. He couldn’t move certain parts, and the last thing he remembered…he didn’t remember the last thing he remembered. He couldn’t remember anything of the past few weeks. The room didn’t look familiar. None of this did.
“Hello, Doctor.” A unicorn stallion approached him, an older stallion, walking on all fours, likely an indicator that he was back in Equestria.
“Where….”
“My name is Dr. Apothecary. I was brought in to assist Dr. Cavell regarding your situation.”
Dr. Cavell? But then that would mean…. “But you’re…standing regularly.”
Apothecary smiled gently. “Ah, no, actually, I was bending down on all fours to pick up something that rolled under a health monitor when you awoke. It was quicker to walk to you the normal way than upright at that point.” The aged stallion reared to his hindhooves and stood there. “Is that more acceptable, Doctor?”
Silver would have laughed, but it began hurting the moment he started so he instead said, “So I’m still in Scotland? But this doesn’t look like the Royal Infirmary.”
“It doesn’t, because you’re not in Scotland. Due to the severity of your injuries and the need for impartiality in the medical staff, you were flown to London. Currently you’re in Barts…St. Bartholomew’s Hospital. I was sent from the Ministry of Health to assist the human doctors in your care. And I’ll be quite honest – it was a miracle you survived.”
“I just…I don’t remember anything, really.” A pause, trying to recollect something – anything. “I can’t remember anything from the past few weeks,” he finally admitted.
“I know. Temporary mental trauma. I’m a specialist in cranial and cerebral health spells, which is why I was brought in for your particular case. Your fillyfriend…sorry, I meant girlfriend told us all about it. Regardless of how you’re actually feeling, you’d better lie and let her know you’ll be fine, Doctor, because humans can be very overemotional, and she was completely distraught last night.”
“Moira’s here?” Something about that made him anxious, both in the good way and the bad.
“Along with your sister and her husband. They’ve been staying at a nearby hotel and are actually just outside right now. I’ll let them in.”
“Wait…Doctor…how bad is it? And do they know?”
Apothecary sighed. “I’ll be forthright, Doctor: your legs and several of your ribs – they’ve been shattered. Part of the reason you’re at Barts is because they have a state-of-the-art cloning facility here, and are creating a set of bones for ribs and your hindlegs and right foreleg. Otherwise, you would never walk again, on two legs or four. Additionally, part of your skull was crushed and we had to use an emergency healing spell to reduce the swelling and heal your skull; fortunately for you, it wasn’t so bad that it had to be replaced – those, I’m told, are some of the most dangerous procedures in human medicine. But in the process of all the spells I’ve been casting, you’ve had some memory loss due to clean up of brain hemorrhaging and associated trauma. It’s been quite an ordeal these past few days.”
“Past few days?”
“Yes. You’ve been comatose for about a week and a half now. As for your family, we had to tell them, seeing as how your sister is your next of kin; and your girlfriend was at the scene of the incident.”
“Incident?”
“I’ll let them explain.” He walked over to the door, opening it. “He’s awake.” Silver heard several gasps behind the door, sounds of relief. “Please, be cautious – he’s probably still in quite a bit of pain.” He stepped aside and let two females and a male enter the room.
Moira wanted to jump at him, take him in her arms and just never let go; only the touch of his sister kept her from doing so. “You’re alive….” she said, tears of joy streaming down her face. She dropped to her knees, putting her head on the bed,
“I could be better,” he rasped.
“You know, baby brother, if you wanted me to come visit you so badly on human-Earth, you could have just told me about Moira,” Cheerilee said, her green eyes red from crying nearly as much as Moira had been. At the moment, she was wearing a blouse and skirt, one she looked good in – Silver always knew his sister always had good fashion sense.
“Heh, and they call me Lucky,” his brother-in-law said. “Man, when we heard what you went through, it’s a miracle you survived.” Cheerilee’s husband Lucky was a simple stallion who worked a construction job; as a result, he was already used to wearing clothing for safety reasons. As of now, he was in a t-shirt, jeans and boots. “But they got the guy, dontcha worry.”
“Lucky!” Moira turned to admonish the gray stallion. “He doesn’t need to know aboot that!”
“I’m sorry, but Lucky’s right,” Cheerilee said, leaning forward and down to hug her brother’s girlfriend, “I’m sure someone from the authorities will come to ask him about what happened.”
“I saw everything, I’ve already talked to the Grampians,” Moira said. She saw the look in his eyes, then finally relented. “It was a driver, a hit-and-run. The arse-banger was dusted up and ran through several zebra crossings with his car and you were the third person he hit. If the Grampians hadn’t crashed one of their own cars into his….” Moira paused to focus; her love had been cut down, but worst of all was that it was one of her own kind, a human completely flying high on cocaine that had nearly ended Silver’s life. “The Gramps had enough t’ put the bleedin’ fucker down.”
Focusing on her brother, Cheerilee said, “Silver, I won’t lie. You’ve got a long road ahead of you, and Fluttershy took time off from her busy schedule to swing by our house to talk to us about what’s going to happen. The Crown will keep you on the payroll, but as of now your job is to get healthy. Once the operations are done and the doctors give you a clean bill of health, you’ll be able to return to Aberdeen if you’d like to start the healing process there. They’ve sent in another group of medical students now – by the way, you’ve been graduated, so now you’re Dr. Silver Suture, T.H., M.D.”
“Isn’t that great?” Moira said, looking at him. “We’ll get you right as rain in no time flat, love.” She rested her head on the bed, as she planned to cuddle the entire bed while he was on it.
Lucky grinned. “Looks like somepony broke you to the halter, huh?”
Cheerilee grinned; she’d been waiting so long for her baby brother to find someone, but she never thought it’d be a human. Ah, well, humans had been in their lives for nearly ten years now, and so if this hadn’t happened to him, it probably would have to someone she knew. And Moira was a nice mar—er, woman and from the look on Silver’s face, he still felt as if he hadn’t quite realized how lucky he was to have someone in his life.
“Moira,” he commented, “this is humiliating.” His face burned with embarrassment. Just a couple of weeks ago, he could walk, dance, all those things that came so naturally. And now here he was, not even able to get out of bed without her assistance. Of which she was still in his bed, the difference being that he was now there, too.
“Don’ give me that,” she tsked, helping him get dressed and such, then out of bed and into the wheelchair. Having her dress him, well – he quickly learned why human nudity taboos were in place and adopted that habit really quickly.
She smiled as she looked down. “Ah…you’re well-built for a man. I like that.”
Silver blushed; it was far more straightforward than he’d ever expected. “Um…could we talk about something else?”
“You should be proud of your johnny. I’d keep it safe for you.”
“Moira….”
“Well then,” she said studiously, changing the subject if only to ease his burning embarrassment, “Today’ll be my last day at the school. They’ll be giving me the big sendoff, they will.” Seven years of teaching at Aberdeen Grammar, and now she was moving on to the next stage of her life: bartending. The job paid far less, but Miguel’s father-in-law guaranteed the job and it would give her free reign to take care of Silver during the day. Furthermore; with Silver’s comfortable salary, they were still well ahead.
“You don’t have to do this for me, Moira,” he said. “You should do things for yourself. Have your own life.”
“I told you, ya git! You’re my life now. We’re doin’ this together, and I’m not walking up the aisle with you in a wheelchair, got it?”
When did we decide we were getting married? I still haven’t even decided we’re dating!
Completely lost as to his thought patterns, she unfolded his wheelchair. He had an old fashioned hand-dragged one, as it wasn’t expected that he’d been it for long. As she helped him into it, a thought came to him, an honest one. “You know, I don’t know what I’d do without you here.”
She helped him into the wheelchair, then slid into his lap, playfully tapping him on the muzzle with a finger. “Ah, you’d probably win the heart of some other axie, love,” she said. “But I got you first. Property rights, y’know.”
He was still as confused as he arrived for the first day of his physical therapy. He’d talked to the doctor, a human physical therapist, and he went over the regimen that they’d be working on together, both on four legs and two. After a grueling first session, he barely managed to wheel himself out of the facility before Moira was there to meet him. Off together they went to the pub, even if he really wasn’t up to being social, but their friends wanted to see him.
He ended up sitting in his usual corner, sans books for a change, musing over some beers with Miguel. “So, heard you had your first session. I thought you were a unicorn and a doctor – healer, heal thyself?”
Silver laughed bitterly as he took a sip of his beer – he’d gotten used to it and now actually preferred it over the cider. “Just doesn’t work that way. There are plenty of spells I can cast on myself, but one as intensive as healing my legs isn’t one of them. No, I must do this the old-fashioned way.”
“Well, at least you have Moira to help you with it. She’s given up a lot for you. That’s what love does,” Miguel said, watching the barmaid deftly handle the evening’s crowd. “I can tell you she’s picked up running a bar like she was born for it, moreso than I.”
“Yeah, but I wonder if it’s wrong to have her leashed to me like that.” Silver opted not to tell Miguel that he felt nothing for her, and that he’d have to find an easier way to break it to her gently; perhaps the Spaniard could indirectly assist with that.
No such luck. “My friend, I’m guessing you’re feeling…well, nothing when you’re with her, am I correct?”
“Um…well, yes.”
“That’s perfectly natural. Both of you have been through traumatic events in the past year or so, and so it’s natural to feel down – you’re still going through your trial, while you’ve helped Moira through hers already. Let her help you, and you’ll see, el amor florecerá.”
“And you’re sure about this?” Silver winced inwardly, knowing this had been the wrong path to take.
“Of course I’m sure. You see, there’s a natural order to things: the Americans are nearly omnipotent; the French have their food; the Germans their beer; the Italians their sportscars; the Koreans their technology; and the Brazilians, football. But it is we Spanish, ah, yes – we Spanish have the corner when it comes to love. Trust me, you’ll see. When you least expect it, it will hit you.”
“Oi! Keep up, y’ bleedin’ tosser!”
“Nik, ‘sat the only words you know, ya poofta?”
“Kin’ell, Roger, yer hardly better!”
Silver tried really hard not to laugh at his friends’ antics. Now that he was out of the wheelchair after four months, now came the part about regular mobility outside the controlled environment of a treadmill. Unfortunately, there had been some nerve damage and human medicine was not yet at the point where nerves could be completely repaired. As a result, when upright, Silver would need to use a cane for the rest of his life, and when on four, he’d be forever lame. It was a hard reality to take, especially since he’d spent a lot of time running through the Whitetail Woods in his youth.
“Something wrong, duck?” Moira asked. She was with him today in the cold Aberdeen autumn air as he walked on the cobblestones. The cane, a nice oak shaft with a pewter pommel at the end, was perfect for his hoofspace and a treasured gift from his friends. But it was also a reminder that his days had changed.
“Leg hurts,” he mumbled, too conflicted to say anything more. Why did she continue to stay with him? He’d all but voiced that he didn’t want a relationship with her. Maybe he should have, but he just couldn’t say anything that would hurt her; she was still a friend, regardless and one he could never repay for all she’d done for him. Maybe she thought it was payback for when he’d helped her though her problems, but that was never on his mind.
In turn, she kissed him gently; he tried his hardest not to flinch when she did. “That’s for courage!” she said with a twinkle in her eye.
Miguel, standing next to his wife, clapped. “See? Didn’t I tell you, hermano? You’re on top of the bloody world now! Enjoy!” Not too far off, the three barflys continued their amiable jibing and teasing, all at Silver’s expense.
The others, watching, cheered the stallion and wished the couple a happy future as he was helplessly bonded to a girl he cared nothing for.
“Got it!” She ran around the flat like a woman triumphant.
“Got what?” he asked.
She held up a paper as if it were her most valued piece of treasure. “The immigration authority, y’ lug! I’ve got permission t’ immigrate to Equestria so that we can be together when you head back!”
His eyes widened. When the hell did she…? Did I? D…. His mind was swimming. He’d been pronounced all in the clear now, far faster than anyone had been expecting. He’d spent the remainder of the year at the hospital polishing his so-called “people skills” so that he could talk to humans regarding medical issues as easily as he did with his own kind. The Medical Service already informed him that upon his return, he’d be assigned to Canterlot General’s Human Medicine Wing at Northside; it was a new annex of CanterGen that was being built to accommodate the large number of humans that regularly patronized the human district of the capital city.
But first, he needed to clear the air with her, and now, he was going to have to be brunt about it – no other way. It was a shame, he really liked her, but as a pony and a human, it would never work out. Just too different, too many obstacles to overcome.
“Moira,” he started, leaning back in his chair.
“Y’ don’t even have to say it, duck. Of course I’ll m—watch out!”
Silver had leaned too far back and now completely lost balance. He tried to reach out for the table, but it was distant enough to need fingers to catch onto, and possibly too far even for the average human. Down he fell, fast and sure, and by the time he thought of using his magic to right him, he slammed against the floor, even as the wooden chair decided it had enough of its years and shattered underneath his weight, letting the back of his head collide painfully against the floor.
There was a brief spin of black and a flash of red.
--S lv an o hea m ?
--H w an ing rs m ho di up?
--Silv r, sa s eth ng!
His head spun. He could feel blood in his nose, in his mouth. His eyes boiled with a dozen pinpricks of sensation. And in the back of his head, he remembered Moira’s warning that he needed to get the chair fixed before it broke – procrastination didn’t help him in this case.
Silver!
He could hear Moira’s voice, as if she were screaming through ten miles of cotton. He couldn’t see much of anything at first, but then his vision cleared…
…and he stared at the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen in his life. Moira’s face, etched with concern. Her eyes, so filled with worry, yet at the same thing so incredibly, amazingly alluring. He tried to speak and found that he couldn’t quite get the words to come out the way he wanted them to. He couldn’t smell a thing, the blood clotting in his nose blocking that, and he still felt—
She leaned down and kissed him. This time, he joined in, hungrily, eagerly; he couldn’t stop himself. He pulled her closer to him and they collapsed on the floor, sharing love until they stopped.
She smiled at him. “I knew. I always knew you would, someday.”
Someday, what? Then it hit him. He couldn’t smell a damn thing. Including the pheromones. Pheromones that had been blocking his mind, not only turning him off from an obvious attraction to her, but indeed, making him think it was quite the opposite; only his growing love for her, manifesting as a beleaguered friendship was what kept the forces of biology at bay.
“How did….”
“Your eyes. It was always your eyes, they never lie,” she said, leaning against him. “Even when you were denying it to yourself, your eyes always showed the truth. You just had to know it for yourself, beat your biology.”
“Then how do I know that five minutes from now I won’t?”
“Even if you do, five minutes from now, your memory’s there. We can beat this together, love. We can be together.” And with that, they kissed again. He suddenly felt nauseous, wanting to move away, but with everything in his mind, he focused on her instead, going into the kiss, ignoring every command of genetics that his and her biology had imbued in them since the days of their equine and primate ancestors, so many ages past. He ignored those ultimatums in favor of his newly-found heart, and the heart won. The flee-or-fight instincts gave way to nothingness, defeated utterly. Never again would he be held in thrall by chemistry.
He rubbed her cheek. “I love you, Moira,” he said. “So, shall we get married?”
“No time to plan a formal wedding,” she sighed.
“No, but we have friends, we have family, and we have to get it done before we move to Equestria so it’ll be easier for you,” he smiled.
“Oh, the gaffer warned me I was going to be skippin’ out on the vicar someday, and damned if he wasn’t right,” Moira said. Getting up to her feet, she pulled him up to his. “Well, we’ll worry about that in the morrow. For now, we’ve got some catching up to do.”
And with that, the pair – a couple at last – went off to the bedroom.
“Excuse me,” a new voice said. “Are you open this early in the morning?”
“Och, absolutely,” Moira said, as she wiped off the bar, before turning to face the voice. “So, what’ll be your pleasure, Mist—” She looked at the human who walked in. “Your accent, American or Canadian?”
“Canadian – I’m from Swift Current,” he said. “I wasn’t expecting to see a British pub here, especially one with a name like The Meddling Spaniard.”
Moira laughed. “I named it after a friend of mine back home in Scotland. And here in Northside, where most of the humans in Canterlot live, you need a little something of home to remind you once in a while.”
“Sometimes,” he said, grinning. “As for me, I like to travel. It’s why I’m part of his year’s FiMPro.” He proffered his hand. “Marty Robinson. World’s Best Juggler.”
The woman at the bar took and shook. “Moira MacLeish.”
A look came over his eyes. “So, single?”
She grinned. “Sorry, but you’re too late – married to the wonderful stallion buried in the books over there.” She pointed to the table and the well-dressed stallion, hitting the books.
“A stallion? But I thought human/pony relationships only worked between men and mares.”
The redhead feigned modesty. “I’m rather special.”
The juggler sighed. “Day late and a loonie short, story of my life. Ah, but I’ll manage somehow.”
“So would you care for a cider? Got Sweet Apple Acres and Apple Valley Orchards on tap.”
Robinson shook his head. “Oh, that stuff’s a little lot too strong for me. Got anything else?”
“Yup, just got in an import of Guinness on tap and McEwans in the bottle.”
Robinson sidled up to the bar. “A Guinness, if you don’t mind. Nothing beats tap.”
She grinned. “A man with a wise decision. Let me get that for you.”
Watching from his table in the corner of the bar, Silver looked up from this voluminous pile of books and grinned. These last few years, it had been nothing less than magical – originating from human Earth, no less.
He was now casting a daily spell on himself to inhibit his sense of smell; essentially giving him the sniffles on a regular basis. At first his friends and family thought it was weird, but he told them it was the only way to block the subconscious signals coming from the pheromones. Dr. Apothecary, when he heard about it, laughed and said he’d make a request to the Mage Guild that an acetic inhibitor spell be created. In any case, now that he’d cracked the case, he’d given many a stallion hope for a relationship with human women – and, to the discontent of mares not interested in finding relationships with humans, made the odds even worse. But once he was firmly ensconced in his relationship with her, he realized that fondness for her was love all along, and gave the girl who had already been in a relationship a chance, soon finding that it wasn’t so bad having a human girlfriend. And then, two months later, the moving vans came to pick up his stuff for the trip to Canterlot. The last thing they did in Scotland was a quick and short marriage with a justice of the peace. It was rushed and haphazard, and somehow perfect for both of them. And now, here they were, in the land he, and now she, called home.
One big change when they arrived in Canterlot was her decision to open a bar of her own. All the human drinking establishments in Northside to date were of the North American “sports bar” type, distinguished only by if the owner was rooting for an American or Canadian team. Well, it was clear that they needed a proper bar, and with a little help from Miguel and his wife, who spent a couple of months here to help Moira plan for her new endeavor, and the once-unhappy teacher was now a very happy bar owner.
The sex wasn’t bad either, he thought; she was a definite kitten in bed, and she later admitted to him it was the fact that he wasn’t human that had helped her to recover from her trauma. Had he been human, she might have been too afraid to take that step in their relationship, to love each other the way couples did. But her pain was gone now; and now all that was in her life was a love that that they’d have for the rest of time.
Looking at from the bar, she waved at him and he waved back. She then came over and brought him a drink, Sweet Apple Acres Premium Reserve. “Now, don’t drink all our profits,” she said, laughing, kissing his horn teasingly, before nuzzling him – it was something that she was getting used to, but she did it because it made him smile.
“Who has time?” he laughed, holding up a book. “I’m having enough time as is trying to memorize these new healing spells and trying to familiarize myself with the new ICD-17. I thought the spells would be hell – I swear, Archmagus Sparkle must have nothing better to do with her free time than make more spells – but the ICD-17? Adding pony and gryphon ailments and the zoonotic diseases? If I was reading this in my office at the hospital, I wouldn’t be home for a whole week.”
“I’m telling you, you’re going to kark it if you don’t take a break. Stop knackering yourself!”
He was about to comment, when a magic letter appeared; he snagged it out of the air before she even realized it was there. Reading it, he grinned. “There. This make you happy?”
She took the letter and was confused; it was written in spellscript, the odd language that was only known to spellcasters as a precaution against accidental spell misfires. As she was illiterate in it, she was just completely confused. “And this means what to me, y’ radgey git?”
“It’s not a spell; I just used spellscript to hide all the stuff. How’s a vacation to Hoofalulu sound? Think about it: sandy beaches, scenic views, plenty of time away from Canterlot, where we can spend time alone and think about having a family, like you wanted….”
Her eyes widened, and then she gave him a loving smile. Then she got called back to the bar, pausing only to blow him back a kiss. There’d be time to be lovey-dovey later with her stallion, her beloved husband.
She grinned. 1.7 to 1 here, 1.01 to 1 back home. Way she saw it, she’d just pissed off every single mare in Equestria for taking one of their most precious resources. After all, she said with a nostalgic grin, that’s what payback was about, wasn’t it?
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Ooh... a new kind of chimera!
With all these chimeras running around genetic diversity is going to be at an all time high.
Have there been any humans that have been studying magic? Granted they can't use it (maybe) but I would imagine humans would learn it for the sake of knowledge.
708646
It might very well be that the human chimeras can use magic. After all, Colby, Orchid and their (has yet to appear) sibling have a unicorn for a mother, while Stuart and Tyler's grandmother is one.
708665
Well you have hinted that Earth had magic. Something big happened to make it die. Normal humans might have at one point been capable of magic.
708678
Three words: Homo sapiens idaltu (modern humans are H.s. sapiens, for the record.)
708693
I was thinking more along the lines of the Greek Golden Age Humans, but sure that can work.
708713
The Greeks may have been H. s. idaltu, for all we know; fossil record's still somewhat in the air, and it's already known that H. sapiens lived at the same time as H. neanderthal, so...
708723
So the diversion with the human/pony hybrids, what do we call them?
708742
From AAG 1:
"...The doctors even did a DNA test to see how it works; the kids have normal human chromosomes, but some of their genes match Mike’s and some match mine. Technically, they’re chimeras, but seeing as how that’s a little insulting, they’re regarded as human.”
I'm presuming that the scientific taxa would depend on their visual appearance. Lyra's kids are likely H. s. sapiens x Equus sapiens monoceros, while DJ's kids would probably be x E. s. famliiaris (a pegasus would result in a x E. s. bellerophon.) For Rosedust, it's probably E. s. familiaris x (whatever changelings are.)
708774
That's assuming the Equestrians even use the same taxonomy to label their species. Marrying two different sentient species together is confusing, and you haven't even got into other possible combinations (griffins, diamond dog, dragon, etc...) that could happen.
708824
Well, if Feeling Pinkie Keen's taxonomy is canon, then the science texts for Equestriani taxonomy is old Warner Bros. cartoons.
708496
Where do you get that from? Moira and Silver's kids will still be half-human/half-pony; the only thing that's changed is the sexes of the parents.
709188 It's the same principle as the other cross-species offspring in the series. Since humans and ponies are genetically incompatible, offspring can only result from using the genetic level amniomorphic spell.
I guess it would depend on who uses the spell. In the past stories, it's always been the female.
710196
Slightly off: it's always been the pony who uses the genetic amniomorphic spell. Remember, as Lyra pointed out, ponies have 62 chromosomes and humans 46, so the spell can dial down what's there and find the compatible stuff. The spell probably cannot upswing human ones. I'd experiment in this with a story, but I have a feeling it wouldn't be a very pleasant one.
712124 Interesting that ponies have two fewer chromosomes than Equus ferus caballus.
This is magic. I don't see a reason why a genetic level alteration spell would have any more trouble increasing chromosomes than decreasing them. I suspect there's no real similarity among disparate species on what functions are controlled by which chromosomes. In other words, the parts of human development controlled by the genes on the first pair of chromosomes, wouldn't all appear on the same pair of chromosomes in another species. (This is, of course, pure speculation on behalf of someone with only a layman's understanding of genetics.)
Now, a story revolving around a "pony genome project" would be interesting!
712176
The difference in just one chromosome alone (e.g. ligers, mules) can cause infertility in the offspring. There have been a few recorded cases of chromosome mismatch (more than two extra) and birth defects start occurring.
I should also note that ponies (Equus sapiens) have as many chromosomes as the common donkey (Equus Africanus asinus). Does that make sapient donkey a subspecies of pony (Equus sapiens asinus?) or a distinct equinoid species, like sapient zebras (Dolichohippus sapiens; common zebras are Equus quagga or Equus zebra).
As a sidenote: am I the only person going to so far as to create scientific taxa for all these beings?
And I've already got dozens of story ideas for the sidestories. Maybe if I can squeeze in a genetics one, if there's enough interest.
712263 I like details such as the scientific taxa and coming up with royal houses. You may be the only one doing it because it's unnecessary to most stories.
712263
do it.
do it in the name of semi-realistic science-y fiction!
I would very much like to see a story with more of your SCIENCE! As a biochemist by training, this genetics and taxonomy stuff makes a really good world-building detail for me.
Just how far advanced is technology on this Earth? 100 years? 200?