• Member Since 26th Aug, 2013
  • offline last seen July 20th

Cerulean Voice


Father of twin 6yo boys, partner of Arcelia, and so glad to be here.

E
Source

Born blind, Snowdrop has always lived a life of limitation. Two years since the glorious event that changed her life and unearthed the blessings of winter, she has again fallen into a rut.
An unexpected visit from her favourite Princess and best friend is about to change that.
After the Princess insists that only Snowdrop can perform a certain dangerous task, she heads into the Everfree Forest to confront a mysterious, previously unknown creature. But how can a helpless blind filly possibly succeed where elite members of the Royal Guard have failed?

Sometimes it takes the blind to see what everyone else cannot.


The extended version of my entry in the Writeoff Association's April event, the prompt being Great Expectations.

Preread by BlazzingInferno, Foxy E, Comet Burst, Quill Scratch, Thornwing, Horizon, Not_A_Hat, PaulAsaran, and NightWolf289. Edited by BlazzingInferno, Foxy E, and PaulAsaran. Proofread and finalised by PresentPerfect and Cold in Gardez.
Thanks to Obselescence for letting me pick his brain in regards to the title.

Cover art by Cold in Gardez.

Featured on:
Equestria Daily!
Recommended by PresentPerfect!

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 42 )

I could totally upvote this, but I will refrain as per your request and whatnot.

I really like this story, but maybe, for whoever doesn't know Snowdrop, you may add an explicit temporal reference on when this all happens. While it is possible to extrapolate it by the clues, it could be a bit confusing.:twilightsmile:

5946227
First, thanks for the read and the kind opinion. :twilightsmile:
Second, I do actually give an explicit time. It's throwaway, but it's there:

Celestia and I believe that it may be a hybrid abomination, left over from the brief Era of Discord eight years gone.

Might be worth me adding this in the A/N though. Thanks!

edit: added to A/N for clarification. Thanks for the suggestion.

I really enjoyed this one., I think the portrayal of Luna and Snowflake was very well done, and for one who has never seen any of the Snowdrop things it gave a good understanding of her character and relationships very quickly. The scene where she jumps into Luna? Perfect way of showing their trust. There were a few points where some the dialogue felt slightly clunky, but these issues are so minor they barely warrant mentioning. Lastly, I really liked the medusa-esque character of Jimwemeble. She was interesting and well characterized. I found myself drawn into her plight, and rooting for her. This is obviously quite a good turn-out. Congratulations on another great story, my friend.

5943702
5947315
Fic's released now. I'm glad you both liked it. :twilightsmile:

A lot of sweat and blood went into this. Great to see it finally released to the world. :twilightsmile:

5943702
This disoriented me quite a bit until I realized the comment was from before the story was published. I certainly hope you're upvoting it now that it's live!

10,039 words total

weknowgifs.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/08/didnt-read-lol-gif-4.gif

Lol JK. This was quite the enjoyable read, looking forward for more from you.

This was one of the best concepts ever.

5959209
Thanks for actually reading :derpytongue2: I hope my other works interest you sometime.
5959331
So glad you approve. Thanks for the follow!

5958662
Everyone played their part well. :twilightsmile:
5958992
Glad you liked it, in the end. It's a far cry from what it used to be.

Amazing little fanfic. Though I didn't realize that it plays in pre-NMM equestria until the end.
Well, I will be headed to the other Snowdrop-related fics, thanks for the good read.
EDIT: hyperlinks the mentioned fictions in the authors notes would be nice.

5964401
Glad you liked it. I did try to write it so it would be accessible to the general public instead of restricted to those who had seen Snowdrop. But here it is, and I really should do as you suggested. Rectifying now.

Again, thanks for reading. I'm rather proud of this short story.
Edit: there's also the Snowdrop Fanclub group, though I can't speak for the quality of every story there.

“A pleasure to see you again, dear Snowdrop.”

"A pleasure to WHAT!? EXCUSE ME!?"

“We welcome all who might see us through such troubled times.”

"... all who might WHAT!? EXCUSE ME!?"

I feel like Snowdrop would fake offense at little things like that just to tease people.

5965569
Aha. Yes, I see what you mean.
Of course I did actually have a few similar slip-ups where I said seeing-related figures of speech that my editors caught. But those two were judged to be okay. :derpytongue2:
tee hee. I hope you liked the read.

5966877
I found another line about seeing that confused me, but it's not a common saying referencing seeing... Just read for yourself.

The sound of magic ricocheted absolutely everywhere; Snowdrop looked around, completely disoriented by beams of power pinging this way and that, bouncing everywhere.

I wondered if this was a minor mistake? I figured I'd ask.
I really enjoyed this story, by the way ^u^ Nicely done.

5970090
Oh that. No, that one's in reference to the sound of the beams going everywhere. Hence the pinging. So no mistake.
Anywho, thank you for enjoying this. :raritystarry:

5971592
No, I mean, it says "Snowdrop looked around"
That's what threw me ^^'

This fic definitely needs more credit then it's getting right now. I think this is one of the best Snowdrops stories that I've seen. You did a fantastic job describing everything that I could picture it without over doing it (if that makes sense :derpytongue2:) Tibasumu kind of reminded me of Medusa. I hope as time goes on, this fic will earn the likes it deserves (which is a lot). :twilightsmile:

An excellent story. And remember; fate has a wonderful sense of humor. The trick is - learning how to take a joke. Hehehehehehehehe.

While I'm not sure if the simplistic writing was a style choice to match the animation, I think the flow could definitely be improved with another pass or two. Still quite enjoyable, just very stilted at times.

5986508

While I'm not sure if the simplistic writing was a style choice to match the animation

It was, actually. I said so in my Author's Note.

Thank for the feedback. I've often been told that being "stilted" is the most noticeable flaw in my writing, particularly where dialogue is concerned. Something to keep working on with future stories.
I'm glad you liked it, regardless. :twilightsmile:

5986634
All I see you mention is about the Olde English.

I'm in awe. This is wonderful! The moment I found out what Snowdrop had to do I (metaphorically) slapped my forehead and was all like "why didn't I ever think of that?" This captures the spirit of Snowdrop perfectly, expanding on Snowdrop's character without ever once compromising it. This definitely needs to be read by more people.

This was nice!!!

Best story ever. Thanks for writing this!!

~Snickers

6110962
Thank you,
5995564
Thank you,
6116345
Thank you,
6122688
and Thank you too. Honestly I'm glad you all liked it, despite its minor faults. :pinkiehappy:

My god that was a good read, I literally lost track of time during the read, it's no wonder my Snowdrop story got so over shadowed, I'm not complaining. :rainbowlaugh:

Jiwembele is by far the most interesting character I have ever read about, at first I had compared her to Smaug from The Hobbit, I imagined her as a very Maleficent like character (1959 Disney Maleficent mind you) but with more tragic elements which I did not think of until her story had been told.

Adding on: Originally I initially thought the creature was based on Yuki-Onna, a Japanese snow spirit associated with Kwaidan (Ghost Stories). I was fully anticipating that until you unveiled the beauty that was seen toward the end of this tale.

(Plot-Key Spoilers coming up!!)

Snowdrop and Luna sharing sight was entirely new to me as a concept, I did a similar concept in my story; Tears in the Snow. involving glasses to help her see, though she never used them for long. I love seeing (no pun intended) the concept used in this way it's a very fascinating idea. Though I must admit I thought at first Luna was giving Snowdrop sight instead of sharing it, I was about to say that was cheating but I was wrong. :twilightsheepish:

(End of Plot-Key Spoilers!!)

There was one thing I wanted to argue (which was the time after Discord) but I think arguing it would prove fatal, You know Snowdrop is set one hundred years after Discord so I have no reason to argue.

brief Era of Discord eight years gone.

Still confused me though. :applejackconfused: :derpyderp1:

To sum it all up, I thoroughly enjoyed this story, while the capturing of Read the story made me jumpy and scream at the screen "Listen to the filly you colt heads!" I enjoyed the outcome, I'm happy to have read it, though so late at night. :rainbowlaugh: Love the story, thumbs up. :twilightsmile:

6152454
I'm so pleased you enjoyed it. I put a lot of effort into this one. It almost never saw release to be honest. I was in a slump about how poorly it performed in the competition I entered its original incarnation in. Thankfully a bunch of people giving me the right critique helped me flesh it out and expand on all the things that I'd overlooked. As a result, this fic is twice as long as it was originally and covers so much more story and emotion.

And yeah, about the Discord thing: Celestia and Luna were already ruling Equestria before Discord arrived, as backed up by The Journal of the Two Sisters (in which he is never mentioned at any time while it does mention that the sisters became Princesses; therefore it stands to reason he took the throne from them some time after their rule began). Their initial defeat of him with the Elements of Harmony was them taking back their kingdom, not taking it for the first time. So theoretically, the (very short, I like to think matter of days) rule of Discord could have occurred at any point in time between year one and year one hundred (the latter of course being when Snowdrop the animation was set). I chose eight because it seemed both long and short enough for our antagonist / missing zebra to both be missed and also have a legend about them established.

Hey, I wrote a review of this fic. In case you are interested, it can be found here.

6255903
And I love that you loved this!

Oh why did I not read this sooner. This is an amazing story and using a fun character as Snowdrop into the mix. Thank you for the wonderful read. :twilightsmile:

6438115
Thank you for your read too. Glad you enjoyed it.

Is there any translation of the zebra names at hand? :rainbowderp:

6840653
I'll PM you.
Thanks for reading! :twilightsmile:

This is best Snowdrop. No arguments.

6942891
I realise just now that I never did thank you for your comment. So, thanks a lot. I was sorta kinda maybe aware without too much certainty that there weren't many actual good Snowdrop stories, so I really wanted to try to rectify that.
Also, congrats on your recent RCL accolade. :twilightsmile:

Since I had not previously read any of my boyfriend's amazing stories, (thus making me a terrible girlfriend) I decided to rectify the situation and read one of them.

I have to say, I'm impressed. I think you did a wonderful job characterizing Snowdrop and I absolutely adore her friendship with Princess Luna. Who, in my opinion, is the best princess. I love the imagery, the way you weave this tale is just beautiful. Here are a couple of lines from Luna that I just can't help but fall in love with.

“Snowdrop, my friend… verily, your greatest weakness is about to become your strongest asset.”

“I swear, Snowdrop, my beloved friend. I promised Lady Primrose—no creature, foul or fair, shall touch a hair in your mane.”

"Indeed we do. Are you ready to prove to the world how strong you can really be?"

Honestly, this reminds me rather fondly of the relationship that I had with you before I even met you. I looked to you as a mentor and as a friend long before we ever started dating and I think this really hits home for me. Like, I have a personal connection to the way Princess Luna is protecting Snowdrop and in a way, how you protect me.

I would just like to say how much I admire this story for how it shows how someone's greatest weakness can become their greatest strength. You've done a brilliant job, and I don't just say that from a girlfriend's perspective. I say that from a writer's perspective. I don't want this to seem bias just because I'm your girlfriend so I automatically love everything you write.

But I genuinely, love this story. :heart:

- A

A beautiful tale using Snowdrop in this story and your own recreation of the story of Medusa. Well done.

Login or register to comment