Just a reader. Maybe stories.
Starting a new school is fighting, but sometimes it can go bad to worse. When the new girl meets her eyes on the captain of every team at the school, which could be nearly impossible. Applejack wants her as her own. While trying to hide a secret of her own, if anyone finds out she is doomed.
This takes place that the human world never had Sunset Shimmer.
My first story, if any improvements please feel free to comment down below. Don't be mean please
Page generated in 0.084 seconds
Total duration
798 users online
1,301,615 hits today, 2,814,898 yesterday
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
It's not bad but it could use some improvements. Like A: how she got the curse?
B: explanation on the shadow thing that's haunting her.
C: Longer chapters.
But it's a start for something good and I'm a sucker for original stories.
this is quiet interesting. The spelling could be improved though, try to get an editor or at least have a friend look over it or something because there are mistakes like instead of saying 'I'm' you say 'am' or other little mistakes like this;
You should have said: Almost.
I think this story, with a bit more improvement will be a wonderful idea! Good Luck!!!
5891993 the curse will be explained in later chapters
That story is so cool!!!
5896916 thx needed that today. More chapters soon.
your grammar is a bit off as you use 'was' instead of 'were' quite a lot. In my opinion you also use the word 'upon' too much. B ut other than that great story
I love this story so long. Can't wait for more!
i do not mean any offence by this but your grammar is terrible and you keep changing from past tense to current tense, in the same scentance.
5905233 i have a problem i cant help it am so sorry about it. My English told me this also. I will try, and sort it out. It happens every time i write a story
Still great
5908069 Thx i think about three more chapters then an final one idk yet glad you like it though
can i just say woooow this is one of the best stories i have read so far honestly i would love to see a tenth chapter could u let me know thanks
yours sincerly
MrUniverse
6010704 Thank you so much. Chapter 10 will be out within two months I think
That's great thanks
.....................