How Every Shipfic Would Actually Happen

by TheOnly

FlutterDash

"What's going on?" asked Twilight, trotting up next to Fluttershy who gazed off into the sky.

"I'm just watching Rainbow Dash fly," said Fluttershy, keeping her gaze towards the sky. Twilight looked, too, and saw Rainbow Dash doing flips and tricks, flying as fast as she could through the clouds. Fluttershy's pupils danced around her eyes, following the pegasus as she tore through the sky.

Without warning, Rainbow Dash went into a nose dive, her eyes being filled with tears as a small cone formed around her.

"She's going for the sonic rainboom!" commented Fluttershy, bringing her hooves to her mouth. It wasn't everyday that Rainbow Dash attempted a sonic rainboom while free-flying.

As she ripped through the air, Rainbow realized she did not have enough space between her and the ground to perform the sonic rainboom, so she pulled out of it as quick as possible. However, as she pulled out she flew straight into a tree, flying straight into the mess of branches and leaves. After a short bit of rustling, she fell out of the tree, a few twigs falling with her.

Unluckily, Rainbow Dash landed on her side and her left wing was crushed beneath her weight. Fluttershy gasped and both her and Twilight galloped over to check on Rainbow Dash.

"Are you hurt? Is anything broken?" asked Twilight, lifting Rainbow Dash off of the ground and back onto all fours.

"I'm fine," croaked Rainbow Dash, spitting a leaf out of her mouth,"My wing is just a little hurt."

She looked behind herself and saw her wing, it was crooked. She stopped moving in horror, looking at her broken wing.

"Oh feathers! I broke my wing!" exclaimed Rainbow Dash, stomping a hoof on the ground. "There's no way I'm going back to the hospital," she said.

"But Rainbow Dash," started Fluttershy,"You have to get your wing fixed."

Rainbow Dash looked at her wing, and then back at Fluttershy. "You take care of injured birds, right?"

"Yes," said Fluttershy.

"Then you can fix my wing."

"Oh... Well, I mean, I could, but-"

"Great! Let's go back to your place and get this wrapped up. I want to be back in the air as soon as possible."

Fluttershy watched as Rainbow Dash trotted toward her house. There was no use in arguing, so she reluctantly followed, unsure if she could actually help Rainbow Dash with her broken wing.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The two ponies arrived at Fluttershy's cottage, Rainbow Dash complaining about how she had to trot the entire way. Fluttershy quietly listened like she always did.

They entered through the door, trotting into the quiet room that housed multiple animals and their families. As Rainbow Dash trotted in, the mice scurried back into their holes, scared by Rainbow Dash's loud voice.

Within a few minutes, Fluttershy had Rainbow Dash's wing wrapped. It took every last spool of it that she had, since it was only meant to cover the area of a bird wing and not a pegasus wing, but it worked.

Afterwards, Rainbow Dash laid down in Fluttershy's bed, resting her broken wing.

"I'll be back in a minute with some food," said Fluttershy. Rainbow Dash simply nodded and allowed Fluttershy to leave the bedroom. Bored out of her mind, Rainbow Dash looked around Fluttershy's bedroom, observing all the pictures and objects that sat on shelves.

After waiting for about five minutes, Rainbow Dash finally heard Fluttershy's quiet steps come close to the bedroom door. She entered carrying a bowl of hot soup. She sat beside Rainbow Dash on the bed and blew on the soup, the steam moving away for a short second.

Rainbow Dash looked up at Fluttershy as she blew on the soup, and she felt a sudden impulse run through her mind. It was time.

"Fluttershy," said Rainbow Dash.

Fluttershy looked at her friend, placing the soup down on the bed. "Yes?"

"I... I want to tell you something." Rainbow Dash paused, taking in a deep breath. "I love you."

At first Fluttershy's eyes grew wide and she jumped off of the bed, staring with bewilderment at Rainbow Dash. The abruptness of the declaration had startled her to the point where she had forgotten that the soup was still on the bed, and as she jumped off of the bed it fell to the ground, the bowl breaking and soup going everywhere.

The crack of glass souprised Fluttershy for a moment, but she got her peas of mind back. Fluttershy's beautiful rug was covered by it, but it was souperseded anyway.

"Is it... is it because I'm helping you with your wing?" said Fluttershy, hoping that Rainbow Dash meant "love" as in "like a friend".

"Yes," said Rainbow Dash,"The sole reason I love you is because you are mending my wing." Her voice did not waver, she was being sincere.

"Do you mean like a friend?"

"No Fluttershy," said Rainbow Dash. She pulled close to Fluttershy's ear, and in a low, raspy whisper, she said,"I want to do dirty things to you."

Fluttershy gave a long blink, trying to process what exactly was going on.

"Well, don't you think that we're a little... too different?"

"What do you mean?" said Rainbow Dash, sitting up in the bed and throwing the blanket off of herself.

"Well, I mean... Well, you like to fly fast, and I don't, you like to do tricks, and I don't, you like to play pranks, and I don't, and you like to race, and I don't. And you also are really loud, and-"

"Fluttershy, what are you talking about? Just because we're different doesn't mean we can't love each other." Rainbow Dash smiled, and Fluttershy smiled back. They embraced, Fluttershy avoiding Rainbow Dash's broken wing.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

A few days had passed, and Rainbow Dash's wing had healed right up. During that time, Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash grew in their relationship. Ever since it had started, it had consisted of Fluttershy coming to the bed and talking with Rainbow Dash as she healed.

Now that the wing was all better, Rainbow Dash could get up and move around again. Both of the ponies were overjoyed that they could finally move forward with their relationship.

They sat in Fluttershy's cottage, Rainbow Dash's bandages lying on the floor a few feet away.

"So... " started Rainbow Dash.

Fluttershy kicked a hoof at some invisible sand on the floor, unsure of what to say or do.

"What should we do?" said Rainbow Dash.

Fluttershy remained silent for a moment, her head drooped towards the floor. After a moment of silence, she lifted her head and looked at Rainbow Dash.

"What do you want to do?"

"Well, the Wonderbolts are having a race in Canterlot. We could go to that."

"That sounds noisy, and fast."

"We could go to a restaurant."

"Sure, which one."

"Any restaurant in Cloudsdale is good for me."

"But I hate going to Cloudsdale. I like it here on the ground."

"We could go eat at Sugar Cube Corner."

"Pinkie works there, didn't you want this to be private."

"You're right, Pinkie Pie and privacy don't mix. We could always tell her to leave."

"I couldn't do that to Pinkie Pie."

Rainbow Dash sighed. "We could just start making out, right here, right now."

"Rainbow Dash!" exclaimed Fluttershy. "There are baby animals here."

"Well then we'll wait until they're all asleep."

"Some of them are nocturnal."

Rainbow Dash groaned. "Well then we'll go to my house instead!"

"But you live in Cloudsdale, and that brings back bad memories for me."

"We can make out on the streets of Ponyville for all I care!"

"But... But people may be watching us," said Fluttershy, shivering at the thought.

"Then what do you want to do, Fluttershy?"

"There's a butterfly migration today, we could watch that. The extra slow ones are flying through this time, so we'll get an extra long look at them."

"No."

Fluttershy frowned.

"Fluttershy," said Rainbow Dash.

"Yes, Rainbow Dash?"

"I'm leaving now."

"Okay."

"Bye."

"Bye."

And nothing sexual happened.

Isn't that souper.

Comments

[TheOnly]

I have no shame, it doesn't get much worse than this folks, I've resorted to really bad puns.

Wake me when this is over, I'm getting some sleep.

[billbob12345]

Kewl

[dance-fox-dance]

I love you.

[rdaniel_76]

667168 There is no such thing as a bad pun!

[RainbowBob]

Well that was expected, never liked that shipping myself. Both of them are way too different.
t1.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTSSgbnH1hWFSwoFyBbcLVRbekYbQ5kvoMPHjJWoyDFrgwYQESaJw

[wazup970]

*poker face*

[MisterMoniker]

That's so souper.

[izcheesyponeh]

I love the souper puns.

[NaturalGlitch]

This is awesome!

[CosmicAfro]

Fluttershy... baby animals have to grow up sometime.

[ThatDiscordGuy]

It`s like a generic cliche flutterdash story at first. Then good old reality kicks in.

[ScriptScrolls]

AND THEN THEY FUCKED

[Z]

"The crack of glass souprised Fluttershy for a moment, but she got her peas of mind back. Fluttershy's beautiful rug was covered by it, but it was souperseded anyway."

Engaging Facepalm.
...
...
...
Facepalm Successful.

[HuskSummers]

So good...never liked this ship, and the puns...so many puns...

[Neuex]

Well, it was funny.

And when Rainbow said, "I want to do dirty things to you."
I was like.
Shit.
I swear that was so out of character it was hilarious.

[IncoherentOrange]

Yep. You've done it again.

[Steel Resolve]

667240 IT'S SOUPER EFFECTIVE!

[SpyroFlame]

I love FlutterDash this was Awesome great parody off all the fics you forgot the random fillyhood flashbacks though

[Alphaetus_Prime]

This chapter shows up as the third to last one

[Meliron]

Those puns...

Nice.

I laughed, like always, especially at the last few lines.

[Incredible Blunderbolt]

Finally someone understands that FlutterDash would NEVER work!

Much as I love the shipping, I'd like to see you do TwiDash next.

[infinite scratch]

Ya...that sounds right

I'm starting to wonder if your being too accurate

[foolyourself]

soup puns are nice too

[Broneyofnoel]

Dat last line
dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/sillyfilly_Fluttershy.png dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/sillyfilly_Rainbow_Dash.png

[JustAnAveragePony]

Loved the argument at the end, :3

[344forever]

Y U so picky fluttershy geez this is why i say scootaloo best pony

[Marine Magic]

667168
Resorted to really bad puns?
Bad puns DO NOT exsist

[aaaa_aaaa]

How did you re-arrange the chapters? I can't seem to find the option :/

[Bombastic Bookpony]

Exactly what I think of it.

[Frostbyite]

narwhaler.com/img/56/4/what-the-i-see-what-you-did-there-spiderman-comic-564ifZ.jpg

[CeresBane]

i could pun-ch you

[Craterfist]

667168
I've got to stop you before you take over the website with your epic!

[Shadowbane]

667168
Bad puns? I think those two words override each-other.. We'll call 'em jokes instead!

[Cedric Bale]

Is it just me or did this chapter cut in line?

[Mayuhito]

Haha that ending. Makes perfect sense!

[ColdGoldLazarus]

This is now what I'll link to whenever a FlutterDash shipper starts going soapboxy on me. Or when I want to troll them. Either one works.

[Natzo]

Seems legit.

[FanOfMostEverything]

"The crack of glass souprised Fluttershy for a moment, but she got her peas of mind back. Fluttershy's beautiful rug was covered by it, but it was souperseded anyway."

Go die in a fire.

Okay, I didn't mean it, but still, there's deconstructing pairings, and then there's just trolling for the sake of the lulz.

[duvagr007]

What a soupendous spin on how this ship would work. You did a souperb job with this one. Good job.

P.S. Soup.

P.P.S. The soup is a lie.

P.P.P. aww you get the idea.

[Tsujin Rilauco]

667168 I don't mean to sound like some uppity bisque, but you shoud take a mulligan with the puns. People tend to go over borscht when it comes to puns, they'll call you a tarator to literature. Now if you'll excuse me, I've got to take a leek.

[ArtieStroke]

Heheh, you said soup. (Brain has checked out for a moment, be back at 5:00)

[Doctor.whooves]

I am souper cereal about my salad
(didn't expect a dinner then breakfast then lunch pun did you)

Sincerely one very punny timelord

[Blitz the Dragon]

I'm surprised no one else here is commenting on how freaking hysterical that link to Patrick was.

[LonelyChild]

667168 I just realized your avatar is Discord
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

[Mally]

667168

If these are your really bad puns, I can't wait to see what happens when someone challenges you to determine pun soupremacy. I imagine what follows is a brewtally goulash verbal beatdown for whatever poor sap tried to mix it up with you.

[NopeNopeNope]

667657 I like flutterdash, but this is hilarious.

[King Rhaegas Targaryen]

667417 WHERE THE BUCKING SHIT IS EVERYONE GETTING THESE NEW EMOTICONS!

seriously.

[Hecatia]

668403 I don't know either...dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/shrug_Luna_apple.png dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/shrug_Twilight_Sparkle.png
dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/discord.png

[Prince Luna]

HAHAHAHAHHAHA FUNNY PUN

[Ecthelion_Yuda]

Puns, one of the oldest and best forms of wit. You sir are nothing short of a genius. Keep it up!