• Published 18th Apr 2015
  • 1,834 Views, 19 Comments

mann vs Equestria - Szalhi



A full scale war is bound on Equestria. Luna is sure they won't win this time. Celestia has a plan. She's hired nine mercenary creatures called humans to fight for them. They have a good reputation. But maybe, they're a bit crazy.

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4 Advantages

Author's Note:

Man, I pumped this out in about 90 minutes.
This is also the first thing I've published in like 14 months.
This chapter is not Edited.

Edit 08 April 2019: Well It seems like my current MLP canon has diverged from this story quite a bit since I posted this chapter. I'm not sure if I'll be adapting the story canon to it and retconning this chapter. My current canon isn't interesting enough to give this story enough plot. The Dragons and Changelings are allies now, the Gryphons aren't even really a civilization anymore.

“Wait wait wait, so you’re meaning to tell me, that they got one of our guns, and we made no money off of it?” Scout asked.

“They’re nice ponies, I’m sure they’ll pay if they want to,” Engineer stated bluntly as he worked on the security around the base.

“If they want to? I mean yeah, these ponies do seem like a nice bunch, but c’mon money!”

Engineer looked up to face towards Scout. “So, Is there anything you would want more than money?”

“Well, there’s to be a hero, to be a great fighter. To Be better than my Brothers. To be rich too,” Scout replied.

“Well you see, here we’re pretty much the most advanced kind on this world. And we’re going to help this nation, whether if we want money or just to kill stuff doesn’t really matter because these ponies will love us. We’ll become more than just heroes we’ll become…”

“Legends,” Scout finished before getting pumped up. “Alright Engineer, You’re not so bad, actually, you’re great! I mean, the way you say these things are just amazing.”

“Well, thanks. But remember that it’s only one gun and they have to study it themselves for a while. See If they are capable of somewhat replicating them. If not, we may help them some more, and we will become legends.”

“Man, this world is going to be way cooler than Earth. We’re going to become gods, I mean maybe not, This world already has some proven ones, but still,” Scout said walking out of the world. “Catchya later Engineer.”


“I’m not sure Rarity, these humans seem a bit up themselves. Like insane, compared to a pony,” Twilight answered.

“While I do admit that some of them look a bit suspicious, there’s still the hoofful of them that look quite dashing,” Rarity commented.

“Now c’mon now, I’m sure everything will be okay. That Engineer Feller was one of the nicest fellers I have met. Besides, the Princesses would never let something too bad happen,” Applejack said.

“Well, they do still owe her a door,” Rainbow Dash Blurted out with a smile.

“You’re right girls. It’s just that, Equestria has been peaceful for many years. Even with their help, I’m not sure if we’re ready.


“This is the situation as we know it. The Caribou are sexist rapists and want to liberate Equestria. The Changelings are a hive race and just want to conquer anything. The Gryphon’s are a military race that just can’t sit still. The minotaur’s are pretty much the Spartan’s. And the Zebra’s government is failing,” Soldier announced in the war room of the base. “Not to mention the Dragon’s just like to beat stuff up.”

“Yes, I guess that is correct,” Shining armour Answered.

“So, according to that, the Changeling’s and Dragons will attack us no matter what. Perhaps we should deal with them first.”

“That would be wise. But the Changeling’s are dominated by cannon fodder,” Shining Armour stated.

“Should not be problem. Sasha can tear through those babies alongside Engineer’s Sentries and pyro,” Heavy replied enthusiastically.

“I’m not sure how that would work, but if you’re sure…”

“Sasha is baby annihilator!”

“Well okay then, but the dragons have thick scales that will be hard to penetrate and are fireproof.”

Just then Sniper walked into the room carrying his rifle.

“Hunting Dragons will be like Hunting Birds. They’re Eyes are vulnerable right?”

“From what data we have, Dragons we’re slain with sword’s by attacking the head, but that’s ancient data,” Shining informed him.

“My rifle should be able to penetrate their eyes along with Spy’s Revolver’s. But Pyro won’t be happy to hear he can’t use fire,” Sniper stated pulling out a round. “This should do just the trick.”

Shining Armor examined the bullet. “This appears different from the ammunition we got with your other weapon earlier. We haven’t deciphered that one yet and this one looks totally different.”

“Different mechanisms. Every gun works differently for different results. That was a shotgun. The ammunition for that is meant to be spread along,” Sniper explained before he turned to Soldier. “Soldier, You have a shell right?”

“Yes I do,” He said pulling out a shell from his pocket and handing it to Sniper.

“Okay, so inside this cartridge you can see that there are individual tiny pieces inside called pellets. These are fired out separately at once to create a spread effect being effective at close range,” Sniper Explained.

Sniper handed back the shell and held up the Sniper round. “Now this instead of firing a bunch of spread pellets fires one concentrated projectile on an area creating a more devastating effect in a small area. That also means it’s more accurate and has more piercing capabilities.”

“That… That’s so cruel and effective,” Shining armor said. “Could we train some of our men to use that as well if we ever needed to?”

“It depends. The Shotguns are made by Engineer himself, but I’m not sure if he can help with manufacturing these rifles.”

“Okay well, that’s the Dragons and Changeling’s taken care of, what do the Gryphon’s do?” Soldier asked.

“The Gryphon’s like to use a mix of melee combat and aerial Attacks. They utilise crossbows a lot along with swords and their own claws.”

“Crossbows? Aerial?” Soldier snickered. “That must be another job for Engineer. His sentries can pick them off mid air with the bullets and Rockets. My rocket launcher will do great too. Pyro may be able to deflect their bolts too.”

“Alright, now that we’ve planned out the defense, we should begin constructing the southern base for the Dragon horde.”


Scout stood at the firing range, Sniper’s Rifle in hand. He looked down the scope, breathing calmly as to steady his shot. His aim was centred over the head of the dummy but he couldn’t get it stable enough. He Fired a shot.

“Damnit!” He shouted as the bullet hit the arm of the target. He turned to Sniper and dropped the rifle into his arms.

“Would you like me to demonstrate?” Sniper asked.

“Be my guest.”

The Sniper took no time to aim as he fired a shot hitting it dead in the head.

“Well then, I guess that’s why they call you the Sniper.”

“Well I guess we hired the right people.”

The Sniper and Scout turned around to the new voice present in the room. Standing there was Celestia Observing their marksman skills.

“What a remarkable weapon,” She commented.

“Ah Yes, Guns, the breaking point of Warfare, the weapons we use to win. You did hire the right guys, Celestia,” Scout replied.

“I can see that we will be able to rely on you to help us through our efforts. Infact we may not be able to offer you enough in return.”

“Oh it’s fine, Engineer taught me something better.”

“And what would that be?”

“That there’s more than just money coming out of that. We’re saving an innocent race. A race that did nothing wrong. We’re the good guys now and we’re going to become heroes,” Scout explained joyfully.

“Heroism is something that is admired greatly in this Country. If that’s what you want, my ponies will be sure to give it to you.”

“It feels really good to be the good guys now mate,” Sniper replied with a smile.

“Now for the real reason for my visit, I’m requesting you all come up to Canterlot. We need to show the Royal Guard that combat isn’t always traditional.”

Scout grinned as he looked over to Sniper. “Bonk.

Comments ( 5 )

Wait, does Scout have access to his favorite radioactive soda?

7409694 He Has a surplus of Both his favourite drinks.

Updates give me some updates im running out of materiel to read.

7479100 Oh I wish.

Heavy: EYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!!!!!

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