• Published 11th Apr 2015
  • 6,003 Views, 126 Comments

My Life as a Sword - TrombonePlayingPony



This is my story about dealing with the nut job ponies all in my quest to get their crap over with so I can just nap the days away. All while being a soul trapped in a sword. I don't know how that all fits together but then again I don't really care.

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Not Very Sharp

“Let me out!”

“Hi there! My name’s Sunny!”

“I would never listen to you. Ever!”

“This is the price of madness’ power.”

“... sorry…”

* * *

Applejack ran through the halls of the old Everfree castle, panting in fear as she fled from the Pony of Shadows. Or at least, she thought that’s what it was. With all the traps and strange noises that had been happening that night, she wasn’t about to take any chances. She came to an intersection, a statue of an armored pony with a rusted sword embedded in the ground stood in the center, diverging the two paths. Applejack slid as she tried to turn to the left, only to crash into the statue. She shook her head, attempting to get rid of her daze as she failed to notice the sword slowly tilt toward her, landing roughly on her head.

“Agh! Dang flabbit! The whole building’s comin’ apart.” She rubbed the spot on her head, getting one glance at the cause of it before the sword was engulfed in white light. Applejack was blinded for a few moments before said light moved away and disappeared into the shadows of the castle. A shiver went down her spine as, from the spot where the strange sword had vanished, a single, blood red eye opened. She didn’t even think twice about running when it was accompanied by a set of gleaming, jagged teeth.

“No pony of shadows is going to eat me!” she cried as she ran for it at top speed down the opposite hall. Meanwhile, the red eye and teeth finished yawning before stretching her arms above her head.

“Holy shit. How long was I out?” the human girl groaned as she got up. She took some time to brush the thick layer of dust off her yellow and black jacket, jeans, and silver hair that covered half her face. “Must’ve eaten something magical that I shouldn’t have.”

Once she was clean enough for her standards -which weren’t very high- she took a glance at the stone walls around her. “Great. Ruins. My favorite,” she grumbled with all the sarcasm she could muster in her groggy state. “Well, guess I better look for a way out.” She didn’t even bother looking at each hallway before picking one and walking down it, hands in the pockets of her jacket.

* * *

In the library of the castle, Twilight was looking through the journal she had found. “Would you look at this Spike. It seems to be a journal that belonged to Celestia and Luna.” Spike didn’t respond as he was too busy jumping at every shadow. Twilight didn’t notice though as she gently turned the old pages with her magic, trying to make out the smudged ink.

Eleventh of A~~~~~~~~~~

~~~~ found something new today. A sword, but not like a normal swo~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~She was really sad and lost, kind of like I was, so we decided to~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Twenti~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Things have been going great since~~~~~~~~~~~~~~seems much happier, though I can tell she still misses her home. She’s told me about it a small bit. A place without~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~have to go to town soon. At least I can bring her with me. No one would~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Been awhile. We screwed up. They found out. I thought I was about to~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~came for me. Didn’t care what I was.

I had never had a friend like her before.

“Wow.” Twilight smiled. “I guess Celestia found someone really special. I wonder if she’s talking about Luna.”

* * *

Rarity, in the castle’s throne room, was trying her best to pull a banner off the wall with her magic. “Come on… you old piece of…” she grunted under her breath. She was focusing so hard that she was completely caught off guard when the fabric suddenly bulged outward, slamming into her muzzle and breaking her concentration. “Oh, the nerve. Why, when I get you down off this wall, I’m going to-”

The rest of her rant was quickly interrupted as a sword cut through the fabric, stopping inches away from Rarity’s face. She took a few seconds to register just what had happened before running away screaming. The blade cut a perpendicular slit in the ancient fabric, allowing the silver-haired girl to pass through from a tunnel behind the fabric. She gave the sword a quick look over before a flash of light returned it to a normal hand and forearm.

“Glad to see that still works.” She looked side to side in confusion. “Where was that screaming coming from, though?” She took a few more seconds to investigate before shrugging. “Whatever. Not my problem.”

* * *

Fi~~~~~of De~~~~~~~~~

~~can’t believe it! There’s another one just like me! Wings and a horn! How that~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~~three of us together, nothing could go wrong. Though~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ the other hybrid, can be kind of a downer.

~~~~~reveal her to Luna? Sure, she’s like me, but can we really trust her?~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Twilight scratched her head at this. “What? I thought she already met Luna, but it sounds like she just met the first alicorn she’d ever seen besides herself.” A glance at the next entry showed that it was in different handwriting. Where Celestia’s had been curvy and nice looking, this was written straight and simple.

~~uary 4th

Celestia thought I should wri~~~~~~~~~~~~know why. I have no clue how writing my thoughts is supposed to improve our situ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~food is alright, shelter has been fine despite the cold winter.

I’m not sure what else~~~~~~~~

~~~~~~~seems rather protective of that sword of her’s. Must mean~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
slept with it still strapped to her side last night.

Twilight hummed in thought. “That sword has been brought up several times, but I don’t remember Celestia having any sword that was important to her in any written history. I mean, there was her greatsword Oncoming Dawn but that was a magical, golden sword that was supposedly forged by the greatest of smiths. Not something found in the middle of the woods.”

Twilight delved back into reading, determined to decipher the ancient pages while completely ignoring the screams and other sounds of terror that echoed through the halls.

* * *

“R-rarity? Was that you?” Fluttershy called out timidly as she shook like a leaf through the halls of the castle. “Angel. Rarity. Where are you?” She slowly but surely made her way to the next bend before slamming into something as she turned. Once her head was clear, she looked up to see the silver haired, red-eyed girl standing there.

They both stared at each other, though with completely different expressions. Fluttershy’s was one of fear and confusion while the girl’s was just blank and bored. After a long, awkward moment of this, the girl broke the silence with a single wave of her hand.

“Yo.” Fluttershy, who had looked about ready to have a heart attack, fell over—complete with a bleating goat sound. The girl looked at the now unconscious pegasus with a grumble before reaching down and throwing her over her shoulder.

“Damn it Sunny and your conscience. Spent so much time around you it rubbed off on me.” She let out another grunt as she adjusted how Fluttershy was on her shoulder. “This is not the kind of lifting a girl my age should be doing.” Once she was set, the girl continued on through the halls, hoping to find something soon to indicate an exit.

* * *

Twilight continued reading the journal, eventually moving past events known to history such as the uniting of the pony races, the fall of Discord, the loss of the Crystal Empire to Sombra, and Luna becoming Nightmare Moon. She was now reading through the time soon after, when the Everfree Forest was just beginning to form and the castle was being abandoned.

Twenty third of June, 257 AD

Though I hate to say it, we must move to another castle. This place has so many memories. At least we won’t have to worry about any ponies getting caught in the traps here since the quickly spreading forest will soon make travelling to the castle difficult.

I suppose there is one positive to this. After all, she never did like this castle. Too confusing, she would always say. Despite her not being the most active of people, sometimes I would agree.

The remainder of the page was illegible, seeming to have been soaked in water. The next few pages were skipped as they were much in the same state. Finally Twilight came to a page with written words.

I miss them. Both of them. I thought losing one hurt, but now I have no one to share my pain with.

Good bye

Twilight flipped through the remaining pages to find nothing remaining. She wasn’t sure what she was more: confused or saddened. On one side of her thoughts, she felt she should go find her old mentor and give her a hug or something, but on the other, all she wanted to do was ask who this other friend was that meant so much to her. The book didn’t even mention when this friend was lost, only at the end mentioning how she missed both.

A sudden chorus of screams broke through her thinking trance. “What in the world is that?”

Spike continued to look around scared as he said “Oh, you know. Probably just more strange sounds of this old castle falling apart!”

“No one likes sarcasm, Spike.” She got up, Spike and Fluttershy’s rabbit, Angel, following her out of the room until they reached a balcony. Down below, Rarity, Applejack, and Rainbow were all running around like their butts were on fire, screaming their heads off about shadows and red eyed creatures.

“Alright, everypony, STOP!!!” Everyone in the room stopped what they were doing as Twilight’s shout cut through the chaos.

“Twilight?” Applejack called out.

“What the? Rarity? What’re you doing here?” Rainbow Dash asked.

“Well,” Rarity spoke while she pulled the banner off her head. “I was trying to restore these priceless works, but then one of them nearly killed me.”

“Wait, hold up.” Twilight said as she flew down to their floor, Angel and Spike riding on her back. “A banner almost killed you?”

“She ain’t the only one to run into something scary.” Applejack nodded. “There’s some sort of one eyed creature running about with sharp teeth!”

Twilight deadpanned. “Really? You sure you two didn’t just see something in the dark?”

“I have to agree with Twi here.” Rainbow spoke. “I haven’t seen any creatures.”

“T-t-t-twilight?” Spike pointed to the far entrance of the room. “Look.” All the ponies turned and gasped as they saw the red eyed girl walk in, carrying Fluttershy.

“That’s the monster!” Applejack pointed a hoof. Before anyone else could react, Rainbow flew straight at the girl, slamming into the girl and sending her flying back down the hall as Fluttershy fell to the ground.

“What did you do to Fluttershy?!” She accused as the girl slid along the floor, her head knocking against the far end of the corridor. Despite the blow, she managed to stand up, though she was bent over with a hand holding her stomach.

“The fuck is wrong with you?!” The girl growled as she and Rainbow stared each other down. Rainbow charged again, only she was forced to veer off as the girl’s arm turned into a sword and she swiped. This soon turned into something akin to someone trying to swat a fly as the girl swung at Rainbow, trying to hit her every time she passed.

“Fluttershy! Are you alright?” Rarity ran over to her as Angel tried to slap her muzzle to wake her. Wasn’t long before she slowly blinked her eyes open.

“R… Rarity?” Her eyes focused on the rabbit in front of her before she gasped. “Angel!” She glomped the bunny in a hug that Angel took with a huff of annoyance.

“Fluttershy dear, what did that monster do to you?”

“M-m-monster?!” Fluttershy stuttered. “What do you mean?”

“I’m talking about tha- wait, where did they go?” Rarity pointed down the now empty corridor.

“They went down the hall!” Applejack called as she ran by. “Hurry! We gotta help Rainbow!”

“Wait! Applejack! We don’t know the whole story here!” Twilight chased after her.

* * *

Outside, on a castle balcony, the girl was sent sliding once more across the floor, this time coming to a halt against the railing. “Fucking pegasus! Quit being a pest!” She growled, brandishing her sword arm. She swung and missed once again as Rainbow clipped her side.

“No one messes with my friends!” No longer enclosed by the castle’s halls, the pegasus took to her natural habitat. She sped up, getting in more passing blows on the girl, though she took them all rather well despite some of the bruises she got.

“I thought… you stupid ponies… were done… attacking me… for no reason!” She yelled between sword swings.

“Eat this, you demon!” The girl turned to see Applejack run onto the balcony, spinning around on a dime before throwing her back hooves into the girl’s stomach. She slammed through the railing, getting out a curse or two before she hit the ground and stopped moving. The two ponies high hooved each other just as Twilight finally caught up, gasping at the girl’s body below.

“What did you two do?!” She yelled, getting in the two stubborn ponies faces. “You had no proof… it had done any harm and you knocked it off a balcony?!”

“But Fluttershy-”

“Is fine. She had no physical wounds whatsoever and there was no sign of some sort of magical affliction.” The two ponies both looked ready to argue something before they closed their mouths, looking around as they tried to think of something to say. And when they found nothing, they looked over the edge of the balcony with horror on their face.

“Oh no! What have we done?” Rainbow flew down on top of the girl. “Come on! Wake up!” She shook the girl, getting no results. She would have continued had it not been for Twilight pulling her back.

“Rainbow! That isn’t helping.” For a moment, Rainbow looked conflicted before she stepped back, allowing Twilight to examine the girl. Twilight’s horn lit up and a faint, purple glow scanned her body from top to bottom.

Twilight sighed with relief. “Well, it’s alive. That’s the good news. It’s also a she based on her reproductive organs. She seemed to have taken the beating you gave her rather well. Only some bruises and a fractured rib I’m guessing from when Applejack kicked her.” Twilight’s magic then covered the girl’s entire body and she levitated off the ground. “I’m going to take her back to my library. You all should head home for now. I’ll tell you when I find anything out.” Rainbow nodded before she teleported away, the pegasus returning to Applejack before finding Fluttershy and Rarity with Pinkie of all people.

“Pinkie? When did you get here?” Rainbow questioned.

“I’ve been here the entire time!” She giggled. “I was down stairs wearing a scary cloak playing the creepy organ that made stuff happen.”

“Wait, that was you?!” Pinkie just giggled some more before bouncing off toward the exit, the rest of the ponies glancing at each other in confusion. They soon followed, though nowhere as energetic.

Author's Note:

Yep. Made another Displaced Fic. We shall see where this goes.

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