"Love is friendship that has caught fire. It is quiet understanding, mutual confidence, sharing and forgiving. It is loyalty through good and bad times. It settles for less than perfection and makes allowances for human weaknesses."
FlashLight Part: Princess Cadence is feeling something suspicious since she is the Princess of Love. So she asks Shining Armor a favor. A favor that may leave Twilight in a huge shock.
SoarinDash Part: Two of Rainbow Dash's friends, who is a Wonderbolt and are twins, sent a ticket to the Wonderbolts Derby and Backstage VIP Pass to see the Wonderbolts. Rainbow is excited about this, but what she didn't know is that the twins are planning to play matchmaker.
Collab with: December Sprinter (Starting Chapter 2)
Proofread by: MLP Fangirl
ON HIATUS for the meantime... I have so many stories in mind...
Interesting
I like the idea of the Streak twins playing matchmaker
What I will say, is try to change POV less, it generally breaks the focus. Maybe instead, if you were talking about, say Twilight, you could have her thoughts in italics. That way we can see what the character is thinking rather than switching POV all the time. Just a suggestion
Ey ey ey! Dis be gud!
I'm liking this so far! But I have to agree with Sky Melody, the constant changing of POVs were pretty confusing. I was able to keep up, but it was a bit wacky. And maybe when you alter back and forth from Twilight to Rainbow Dash or vise-versa, you should say something like:
"Meanwhile, back in Ponyville . . ."
Or something like that. It seems more fluid. I can't wait to get started on the chapter!
This is a good idea, but the grammatical errors made it hard to read.
For example...
This was mentioned more times than necessary. One time is fine, but afterward Spike's presence is just implied.
You also should add in some commas and other punctuation. Such as...
It should be: "After I drop my stuff off, I am so going to get my beauty rest; then I'll go to the salon," Rarity said.
Like I said before, this story has potential, but it definitely needs some fine-tuning. If you want, I'd be totally willing to help out. If you need an editor, feel free to PM me or something.
5912850 noted
5913924 You're hired!
5913982
All right, then. Once you're ready to post another chapter, give me a heads up
.
I'll be waiting.
5913998 Okie-dokie-lokie!
WOW!...She's good.
...Uh-oh! That's gone be a joy-ball.
Awesome so far! Keep up the good work, I enjoy this!
5914649 Thanks!
I really love your story.
I hope you update the new chapter soon.
I can't wait!
5923151 I have to wait for December Sprinter.
5923671
OK, I'll wait for it.
Dis is gonna be good
5924730 You bet.
Flashlight and Soarindash
too much awesomeness
SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
You made me fall over laughing.
Till I die.
Welp, I'm outta here.
UNTIL NEXT TIME WHEN THE CHAPTAH COMES OUT.
MAKE IT ALREADY!!!!!!
My favorite couples:
1) Flashlight
2)SoarinDash
3)Sparity
4)Applejack and Caramel
5)Fluttershy and Thunderlane
6)Pinkie Pie and Pokey Pierce
7)Sweetie Belle and Button Mash
Also.... WHERE IS SECOND CHAPTER???!!!
OMG OMG OMG OMG!!!! U JUST COMBINED 2 OF MY FAV SHIPS!!! (the other being fluttercord) THIS OFFICIALLY MAKES YOU MY 3RD FAV AUTHOR! Sorry, SweetHarmony and Calm Wind are just too amazing!!!!
Great book you got here my friend. This is really getting good and fun to between soarindash and flashlight parts.
ohhhhhhhhhhhh mi gosh i love this tory so much it is now my second fav fic but what is ( or in spikes case, baby dragon) means it cunfuses me but anywho i LOVVVEE this