Just A Chat

Appledash91 stories ·147 members

Rainbow Dash promised soon as she got out of the academy, to tell her to meet her at the lake. When she arrives Rainbow, and Applejack has a chat for the night.

Note: I changed it because people didn't like the original. Hope you like this one

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Comments ( 5 )

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Phaedra

Phaedra #1 · Apr 9th, 2015 · · ·

You need an editor. Otherwise, it was a half-decent story. Except the romance was overshadowed by Dash's complaints, and Dash comes off as annoying. Tell me, did you struggle with the 1000 word minimum?

startistic fluttershy

startistic fluttershy #2 · Apr 9th, 2015 · · ·

5841594 yeah a lot

Phaedra

Phaedra #3 · Apr 9th, 2015 · · ·

5842626 If I could make a suggestion, try decribing the setting, the birds whistling, the warm sun, etc.

startistic fluttershy

startistic fluttershy #4 · Apr 9th, 2015 · · ·

5843589 thx I will edit it later thx u so much for the suggestion. Ur the only person who has offered something that will make the story a little better then my original

MrUniverse