[img]http://i.imgur.com/NtX01an.png[/img]
(Clean family-friendly comedy with adorable Celestia being adorable, absolutely nothing explicit) Now with youtube readings! The Gentlemanly Reading by The Magpie, the Scientific-Plushie-Method reading by HanaYoriUta, And the Manly Reading by CaptainBron3y!
Should you find yourself a visitor to Equestria, it would benefit you to be able to tell a pony's rubby-tubby from his or her boop-button and fuzzy-wuzzy. Herein is your definitive guide, written by an expert upon the science. Published with the royal approval of Her Royal Majesty Princess Luna and the silent tolerance of Her Royal Majesty Princess Celestia.
Published by the Royal Canterlot Publishing House for the Royal Equestrian Diplomatic Mission to Earth. For human audiences only. No alicorns (or humans) were harmed in the making of this guide.
Inspired by this thread by Nuke
![http://i.imgur.com/NtX01an.png[/img]](http://i.imgur.com/NtX01an.png[/img]){kind=link}
..... Have you been running lines of scratch-n-sniff pony pictures again? This was acutely adorable, lusciously lovely, and lots of other alliterative descriptive terms.
Can't....breathe...
So...Awesome!
How I have missed the butler!
You're a monster. Now I want to cuddle with ponies. Also:
HA!
Hilarious chapter.
BBBUUUUUTTLLLLLEEEERRRRRRR~!
There is so much bullshit here that it becomes THE truth, hard to denied all the truthness here. Thumbs up!
5822904 Is that Spike as Moist Von Lipwig and Rarity as 'Spike' in your avatar? My kingdom, my kingdom for this fanfic to be written!
5822924 I've got a chapter in the works. But knowing me, it'll probably be another month before it sees light.
5822973 Me too. I guess writing about cuddling ponies is the next best thing....
5822974 Why, thank you!
5823020 I have a talent for bullshit. If I were a pony, my cutie mark would be rather offputting.
Smiles and cuddles all around! This is far out, even for The Butler... but yet it's perfect :)
Now where is a pony when you need one. *sigh*
I could not go read this chapter without laughing. You win this round, for now...
This. Was. Beautiful. Just.... beautiful. It reminds me of why you're one of my favorite authors on the site.
Must find a pony now.
So adorabibble
This is so wrong and yet so right as well.
I can't help but love your depiction of our glorious Lady Moonbutt. May she receive all the hugs and tummy-rubs she desires till the end of all things.
*Studiously takes notes*
Only one person would dare to give her the raspberry! Lonestar!
Dude. You've killed me. With laughter. Twice over.
This was awesome.
BRILLIANT!
'Your Harmony Pony and You' and 'Equestria's Weapons of Mass Distraction' is whats needed now
5823043
I know, I've had similar feelings many a time, but no-one I've approached has felt they'd be able to live up to Sir Terry's master work.
I don't suppose you feel up to the challenge? He'd never begrudge an attempt...
But... but what about the flip-a-flappers?!
That was a cute and funny fanfic. I love how the "boop-button" is used to reset Celestia and how the Butler uses the "huggle snuggle" zone to calm Celestia.
As I was reading this, I found myself listening to The Gonk. It is highly fitting.
I wonder what this would be like if Zefrank1 read this fic.
5823935 I am in the middle of struggling with one. Been working on it since the news about Sir Terry bowled me over, but just couldn't get the whole thing together properly. Here are some snippets from it:
5823243 What do I win?
5823666 Thanks! Fixed.
5824021 There is a deleted scene that I just couldn't work into the flow of the story. The description of each part was meant to flow into the next. The flip-a-flappers were meant to double as built-in snuggle-blankets, but, yeah, didn't make the final cut in the end.
The is Fantastic, and I hope to read more of Butler soon.
Hahahahahahahaha!!!! Awesome!
We need to engineer these cuddle monsters... No army could stand against their cuteness.
Now that was entertaining!
I got the die-a-beauties now
ecdn.funzypics.com/grumpycatmemes/pics/16/I-Have-A-Rare-Medical-Condition-Which-Can-Be-Treated-With-Cuddles.jpg
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Must snugglewuggle the nearest ponywony.
The stallion equivalent of the 'Buck-a-trot' is the 'Alicorn-Slinger', designed to launch weaponized friendship warheads (quite often the stallion's own wife) at unsuspecting elder gods. (For further information on how Equestria weaponizes friendship, please refer to my lengthy dissertation on Equestria's Weapons of Mass Distraction).
This part was the best. I snickered like an imp for 6 minutes and 23.9 seconds. Longest record yet. You sir, win the internet.
This was teh greatest thing ever!
Cute
Where has this been all my life
5823043
My special talent is 'Not Giving A F*ck', so my cutie mark would be a honey badger.
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It's the secret to my success, I think.
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In fact, my ability to give no f*cks rivals on being a superpower.
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It can be difficult, being so talented...
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But as long as I bring a little joy to the world, it's worth it.
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excuse me while go die in the corner...
can't. breath.
I'm adding this story to every bookshelf I have.
*repairing laughbox. estimated repair time: 5 years, 2 months, 3 weeks,1 day, 6 hours, 2 minutes, 8 seconds*
5825113 ya called it close there, if you were to say "not giving a sh!t" then we would have problems, cuz that's my thing.
yeah, yeah. you wouldn't give a f*ck either way...
obligatory not giving a sh!t photo real:
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why did I say this?
....
cuz I'm bored.
That was hilarious XD.
Good work!
So in shorts ponies are a mixture of a dog, a cat, and a baby all in a single organism
Fascinating
5824734 *Extremely Unmanly sqee at sight of picture*
CAUTION:
Over-strokage of petty zone X, otherwise known as 'Rubby Raspberry tummy', may cause your fuzzy wuzzy to spontaneously inflate to dangerous fuffle quantities due to 'The Fluffle Virus'. As shown in the diagram below.
vignette1.wikia.nocookie.net/mlpfanart/images/1/10/Fluffy_pony.png/revision/latest?cb=20120311061118
Side effects to prolong exposure of 'The Fluffle Virus' may include:
Excessive need to rub against Virus carrier.
Impulsively screaming "IT'S SO FLUFFY!" at the top off your lungs.
Trying to eat Virus carrier because of mistaking it for candy.
If you experience any of the listed side effects above, please turn to page 729 in 'Your Harmony Pony and You' Safety Guide.
What!? no Butler tag?
I challenge anyone to read this without showing any signs of humorous enjoyment, this includes...
laughing, chuckling, guffawing, snickering, smirking, giggling, grinning like an idiot, having someone else read it, skimming over the text or ignoring it completely, rolling around on the floor while honking like a swan, rolling around on the floor while snorting like a pig and having your sides explode from either laughing too much or holding back too much laugher
5826040
yeah nothing...but it's really early for me and I haven't eaten anything so I could just be too crabby to laugh.
Coming soon to the BBC, Planet Equestria, narrated by Sir David Attenborough.
Just want to say that there are some mistakes with the dialogue.
5826092 Wait, David Attenborough?
...
I'd watch it. Repeatedly. Best narrator ever!
Butler is screwed.
Headcanon accepted.