LVI. System
“You really should be working,” Evenstar grumbled as he begrudgingly began to take a drink of the soup levitating before him. He grimaced as he propped himself up.
“Too hot?” Amethyst asked as she absentmindedly swung the kettle further from the fire.
“No just… sore,” He sighed as he let his head rest back on the pillow of his makeshift bed. “I’m not hungry anyway, go do your research.”
“We aren’t working until you eat,” Amethyst said as she let the bowl drift to the table.
“If I ate every portion you required of me I’d be fatter than a pig,” Evenstar quipped as he propped himself up on the table once more. “Give it here.” He took the bowl in his trembling hoof.
“I can help,” Amethyst offered as she let her aura engulf the bowl.
“No, no…” Evenstar said as he pulled the steaming soup toward his mouth. “I’ve got to get back to work soon.” As it reached his lips, the foreleg that he had been using to prop himself up gave way. A cacophony of sound and soup filled the room as Evenstar’s breakfast spilled across his bed. This was the third time in the past two days this had happened.
“Evenstar,” I said as I approached the bed. “You really need to relax. Your leg won’t heal any faster if you keep pushing yourself like this.” Evenstar glared at me as Amethyst quickly tended to the mess he had made. A fire burned in his eyes, one of anger and determination, and yet, it was dwindling ever so slowly.
“I will not rest. Not until my research is complete.”
Amethyst shot me a glance to keep me from arguing, for there was no use. Despite being bedridden for nearly a week, he still complained daily about our help. I don’t think he realized how much he need, and keeping him in something so confining was difficult to say the least.
When we weren’t tending to Evenstar’s, Amethyst and I tried desperately to keep working on the minor breakthroughs we had made on the shell. We both felt like something was there, something important, but without Evenstar everything just felt… meaningless.
An hour later, and Evenstar had been fed. After which he promptly fell asleep. It was growing difficult to work without him, but we tried our best to plod along and continue with our research.
“So, where were we?” Amethyst asked as she let out a sigh.
“Uhh… The summation?”
“Right,” she said with a nod as she walked back to the board and drew the parabola once more. “So what is this area?
The question lingered in the air as she drew out the complicated formula. Every iteration brought an increase in resolution, but much more time was spent working out the answer. When she reached the end, we exchanged glances before she let out an exhausted sigh. “Now what?”
I scrutinized the math as I let my mind scramble together any modicum of direction. I was running out of sensible ideas, and I knew she was picking up on my lack of understanding. “Can we set the resolution to infinity?”
Amethyst’s jaw dropped open. “Uhhh… no,” She said bitingly. “Do you have some method for doing that?
“Well th-the limit might work.” I quickly tried to retract my stupidity, but Amethyst had grabbed it.
“And how do you expect to do that?!”
“I… I don’t know…”
“What do you mean you don’t know?” Amethyst shouted as she tried to coax any sensible idea from my mind.
“I just don’t know!” I shouted as I stomped the ground. “None of this makes any sense anymore!”
Amethyst looked to the ceiling and let out a frustrated sigh. “Starswirl, come on!”
“Look, I’m sorry,” I shouted as I stared wide-eyed at her. “I was just throwing around ideas, but everything has started making less and less sense. We’re dealing with 3D functions now, 3D functions! We’ve got scraps of the most advanced mathematical system lying around this chalk board, but I can’t give you all of the answers!” As I cooled off I looked to Evenstar. The stallion who had brought us to this point lay asleep in his makeshift bed.
Amethyst let out a sigh. “I’m sorry,” she said softly as she stepped to the chalkboard and erased our most recent scribblings. “I just feel like we’re so close to a breakthrough.”
“And what will that breakthrough grant us?” I asked as I stepped to the chalkboard and tapped the first half of the analog equations. “Another door to be unlocked?” I looked to her and frowned. “Without Evenstar... I don’t know what I’m doing here.”
“Starswirl,” she started.
“I’m sorry, Amethyst. Without Evenstar, I can’t do much here,” I said as tears welled up in my eyes. “I don’t think I’m the genius you think I am.” I looked to my mentor as he lay peacefully on his side. There was nothing I could do to help him, and likewise myself. He had been my support, but now, when the curtain had been pulled back and the truth revealed, I wasn’t who they thought I was.
I turned and trotted to the windows, not sure what I would find in that endless expanse of cloud and sky. As I passed the tables, I could hear Amethyst start to call my name, but I couldn’t care. All I could think about was how everything had fallen apart so suddenly. There was a role that I thought I was supposed to fill, but now more than ever it was clear that I simply could not rise to the challenge.
You’re just an earth pony, I thought as I looked across the clouds below. There’s nothing here for you. The quiet rustling of paper beckoned for me to look behind me, but all I could do was let my mind wander from cloud top to cloud top in search anything to distract my mind from its own self destruction.
I don’t know how long I sat like that, but I do remember Amethyst’s voice interrupting the silence. She spoke a phrase that had some distant familiarity to it. Like I had only heard it in a dream long ago.
“Answer isn’t… number?”
My mind latched onto that phrase, desperately trying to understand why it was so familiar. Then, as if a light suddenly turned on in the darkness of my mind, I remembered that night as I stumbled to the desk and wrote those words. It was my small revelation in the middle of the night.
“Where did you find that?” I asked as I looked back at her.
“It was on the table. I was looking for one of our old graphs. Why? What does it mean?”
I stepped to her side and read the page once more. “It means… It means we’ve done it.” I said as a small smile spread across my lips. “Amethyst, the shell… the answer isn’t a number that we’re looking for. This isn’t an equality, it’s a…” I hesitated as I looked at the chalkboard where the first half of the analog equation was written. It stood as a warning to us that when one door was opened, another would always arrive once more. Our discoveries were not answers, they were progress.
“It’s a system.”
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First.
8467490
Please comment on the story, none of this silly OMG I IS FIRST non-sense. >:
There are some errors, can't fix them at the moment, but I'll say that this came from so long ago that I honestly don't remember writing it.
So yeah, good chapter, but it sped up too much in the end. A longer revelation would have been preferred to this.
Also, man there's so much more to show you guys, I forgot how much I loved this.
Fuck yeah! More math and shit!
(In all seriousness I'm glad you updated this story, it was very interesting to me and I hope I can see you complete it.)
More!
The discovery of existance is the first step.
The discovery of the entity is the second step.
The discovery of the idea of recursion is the third step.
Thus is the bootstrap invented.
And lost, so easily.
8467525
I think coupled with the previous chapters where they're dancing around it, this revelation was just fine!
AAAAAAAAAAAH an update.
Pony history of calculus fic is best fic.
Thank you Samurai
Good to see you back. I thought that this story had joined the dead.
Just a quick question. Will the movie influence the story in any major way? As it is right now, I was enjoying the deviations you were making from the canon source. My reason for asking is that I prefer fanfiction that branches out from the canonical show, as well as the fact that I have a slight... Dislike in the direction the show has taken for sometime now. If it is the case that you have taken major inspiration from the show's current canon, that is fine. I just usually prefer it when the show is used as a rough template instead.
Anyway, it is nice to see you back Samurai, it has been a while.
8468234
As it stands right now, I have no intention of changing my outline for this story to align with canon. That said, I do want to stress that I'm interested in speeding things up a bit from here on out. I realize that a lot of these scenes with Amethyst, Evenstar, and Starswirl are starting to feel kinda repetitive and repetition does not draw in readers.
Honestly, the only way I could justify changing this story is if a specific Starswirl episode came out. Obviously there's references to lore that is mentioned in the show, but they don't hold any significant bearing on the actual story. My goal with Memoirs is to make a show-independent book, similarly to how FoE stands on its own without needing to understand the show.
My main goal was always to write something timeless. I think Memoirs is fairly timeless. There's lots of overarching themes that don't rely on the themes of the show, especially the inner turmoil that Starswirl encounters on an hourly basis. In the end, it's a book about a genius who is as gifted as he is unsure. It's turned out to be an incredibly interesting concept. We always see these historical figures in lights of heroism, strength, and bravery, but history rarely glosses over or ignores failures, weakness, or cowardice. Those are the values that really make someone worth talking about, but they never are.
Thus, the inspirational aspect of their character is glossed over by 'omg they were so great,' because it's a lot easier to sing praises when you only know the good about someone.
So yeah, I doubt anything in the actual show will conflict with this, and if it does, so be it. Starswirl is fully fleshed out in my mind at this point, changing him would be tantamount to replacing an entire character, and I can't do that, because at the end this story is about Starswirl and his struggle, not anyone else.
Finally, yeah, I'm glad to be back. I'm not sure what exactly 'back' means, or how long I'll be here, but I'm back for now. The warm welcome has been really great. :)
8467490
Ignore him, he's a friend of mine.
You know, like the friend that your mom makes you hang out with even though you don't want to.
Oh, wow . I remember reading this fic within hours of each new chapter.
Moar please!
8468800
Glad you're still reading :D
I'm working on another chapter tonight, actually. I'm not sure what happened, I just kinda felt I should start writing again.
8467505
Sorry, bit of an in joke as I was talking with the author as he posted it. I was lucky to convince him to post the chapter, and I'm so happy that I've got him to write more too, I've missed this series.
8468392
HEY.
Ayyyyy its back!
I started Calculus a little before you began this story, and it was such a satisfying surprise to reread sections as I was going further in class, and starting to understand more and more of what you're writing about. I'm glad to see you back and hope that fire under your butt stays lit, great work as always.
8468385
Well, you do know that you'd better hurry up. Episodes 25/26 are coming soon and it will probably explain about Starswirl's fate and what happened to him 1000 years ago.
Get it posted before they do!
8469914
Woah woah wait, his fate? You are doin me a frighten.
So it's been a while, but from the way I understand it, they are trying to make a dome so that it is perfectly smooth instead of blocky, correct? And to do this, they are trying to figure out what math system? Trigonometry?
8472506
The 'analog equations' are effectively calculus. But yes, they're trying to achieve a perfect sphere without the blockiness caused by the MMU
...Soooo we going to wait another year?
Or something else
8476284
I'm working on the next 4 to 6 chapters at the moment, that will wrap up book 2 for printing actually.
ooh, i always loved Equestria Prevail's headcanon for mlp lore as well as his art so finding this is quite satisfying to me.
8476694
I will read all of the words!
Mathswirl is best swirl.
Yay it has an update I may be a bit late in reading it but better late then never
Well.. you haven't been on in a few months, but I am still very much enjoying this story
now that I've waited two years to catch up :V, calculus is magic confirmed7013747
I dont know.
*eye twitches*
Fu*king superb you funky little robot man.
9393593
Hope your ok
Hello there ! I just catch up to the story after reading the first volume (the pony print project physical version) I hope that you'll get to continue it one day !
Y'know, this might be kinda sad, but I've been checking on this story ritualistically for every week on the weekly for... the longest time. This story, even though it's been a while since I've done a read through, just connected with me in ways I couldn't put words to. The way concepts were approached with character interaction were incredibly well done, and more than anything I just hope that the author is doing alright, somewhere, even in the world state we're currently living. I don't know if I really had a point in writing this other than being sentimental, but... yeah! This, in my eyes, has been one of the greats for the longest time, and I can only hope, regardless of if this actually updates or not, that the author is doing fine, and that some words of appreciation would do a decent job.
But yeah! Still adore the concepts of this story and the characterization of everyone that we've seen, and I think I might give this another reread real soon, for old times sake.
10032131
The author hasn't been on fimfiction since like 2018.