• Member Since 26th Dec, 2012
  • offline last seen February 26th


Put the cart before the horse, mix things up, and look at them in a different way.


Princess Twilight Sparkle wants Equestria to join the rest of the world and finally switch from measuring in hooves, pounds, and gallons to meters, kilograms, and liters. But not everypony is happy about her proposed change.

Now with dramatic reading. Thanks, scorpion1m!

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 70 )

Is there a canon standard of measurements? My headcanon already has them using metric.

5815697 They only ever say non-metric measurements in the show. Miles and inches have both been used.

Looks like Equestria is centimetering its way towards progress!

“I’ll only support the change if I get to make up my own wacky units! Like kilofunnies, or happygrams, or utils!” Pinkie exclaimed.

:pinkiegasp: Oh Pinkie, you so wacky.... wait a minute, Pinkie's using utils? Burn the economist! burn her, I say!

Celestia asked, “Do ponies no longer wish to measure based off of the width of my hoof?”

There was a funny anecdote in another story about how Equestrian scientists of old used Celestia's barrel as a fundamental unit of measurement, but after 300 years and the invention of cake, they quietly switched it out because according to their measurements, everything was getting smaller.

5815713 That's hilarious about Celestia's barrel and cake :rainbowlaugh:

Also, economists are the philosophy majors of the business world.

5815721 Whoah, whoah, that story had nothing to do with cake, that was just a footnote. It was determined by all the scientists who weren't banished that the world had begun mysteriously shrinking (except for Celestia's barrel) and thus some other unit of measurement that was shrinking at an equal rate would be a better choice.

5815729 Ah. What story was this? Now I'm curious.

5815733 It's somewhere in Starswirl and the Purple Terror, I may have misremembered parts of it, but that is a great story.

5815739 Cool, it's on my RIL list, thanks :twilightsmile:

5815721 Also, philosophy majors are cleaning up when they get MBAs, because they go around saying they have "critical thinking skills" developed by their undergrad. Not saying that is true or false, just a nice symmetry.

I will say that moving from the UK to the US that inches, yards, and feet made no sense to me. Now, I can't go back to metric.

Not to say the UK didn't have odd measurements. I mean, what the hell is a stone? As in "I weight X stone".

Pinkie Pie in Griffon the Brush Off: "Hmm. Maybe a few inches to the south. Now a couple centimeters north. Okay. One more smidgimeter to the-- "

The other references to miles and inches I could find were all more figures of speech than precise measurements. (I researched this for my story Time on Their Hooves)

Anyway a great fun story. I liked the Pound Cake jokes.

5815704 I may have to adjust my headcanon some.
Might be a good idea to do a S1-4 marathon to refresh things inside my brainpan as well.

5815785 Glad you liked the story!

Twilight Sparkle refers to a candy cane as being eight feet tall.

5815804 I have been meaning to watch them all again sometime.


Not to say the UK didn't have odd measurements. I mean, what the hell is a stone? As in "I weight X stone".

14 pounds. I fail to see why using 14 as a multiplier is any odder than 1760 (yards to a mile). Personally I've always weighed myself in kilograms anyway.

The only major things which are still measured almost exclusively in Imperial units in the UK are road distances (and hence speed and acceleration), beer, and milk. Pretty much everything else is metric.

Personally when I need a measurement in a fic, I use something like "three pony lengths".

so many sequel ideas based around on how we as humans view science and math it herts :applejackconfused::pinkiesick:

(laughing) P.

5815913 that would work in many occasions, but most of my stuff is of a more technical nature. That WILL work perfectly in an upcoming fic I have in the planning stages currently.

Horses are traditionally measured in units of 4 inches called "hands." I guess they had to retire that system because Lyra wouldn't shut up about it.

>One celestia tall.

I think my headcanon is being updated against my will.

Twilight: But what about Luna?
Celestia: What?
Twilight: Why are you disregarding her hooves?
Luna: *gasp* Is it true, Sister? Wouldst thou truly disregard our hoofsies like this?
Celestia: Let's hear three cheers for the metric system!

Okay fine, I admit it. That last gag got me. The thought of Celestia subtly telling Equestria "Don't you fucking dare convert," is really funny to me.

This. Thank you for this.

A tragic ending, if there ever was one.:rainbowlaugh:

Metric is better. Why do people think it's so hard to measure in powers of ten? WHY?!

I like the metric system for everything except cooking, because you're much more likely to change a recipe by a factor of 2 than a factor of 10.

And the metric system didn't start related to universal constants, if I recall correctly. The units are now tied to the things Twilight mentioned, but it's a retcon that could as easily be applied to the Equestrian system of measurement.

Also, it's much easier to use English units when writing song lyrics. Mile fits a heck of a lot better than kilometer.

Every joke just flowed right in to the next. I loved it. The best had to be the Celsius thing xD

So when will Equestria adopt a decimal monetary system? In the immortal words of Sir Terry Pratchett, the old British money is described:

"NOTE FOR YOUNG PEOPLE AND AMERICANS: One shilling = Five Pee... Two farthings = One Ha'penny. Two ha'pennies = One Penny. Three pennies = A Thrupenny Bit. Two Thrupences = A Sixpence. Two Sixpences = One Shilling, or Bob. Two Bob = A Florin. One Florin and One Sixpence = Half a Crown. Four Half Crowns = Ten Bob Note. Two Ten Bob Notes = One Pound (or 240 pennies). One Pound and One Shilling = One Guinea.
The British resisted decimalized currency for a long time because they thought it was too complicated."


I, as an American can say that the metric system makes no sense at all. I have never been able to make heads or tails of that infernal system. I should also note any math is in Klingon to me. Why it is taught out of the sciencetific circles is beyond me.

Luna is still getting used to the lack of cubits, barleycorns, and ells.

You know, if I had been a Pony in the crowd, my first question would have been "Does Celestia know about this?"

There stood the towering form of the princess, exactly one celestia tall.

That's it.
I lost it.
Well done.


Then whats a quid? And is a coupla' quid more than two quids?

Teh british monies baffle me

Imperial/US standard units don't run in multiples of two either, so I'm not getting your point here.

It wasn't always the same constants as now, but it was still measurable constants.
The metre was one ten millionth of the distance from the north pole to the equator (or rather, it was the best measurement the French could get for it in the late 18th century, and then set as that regardless of any later measurements of the Earth).
The gram was then defined as the mass of a cubic centimetre of water.
The second was defined (using non-metric-style multiples) as one 84600th of an average (mean) day.
And then ever other measurement considered metric in the 19th century was defined in terms of these three units.
While we're comparing to imperial/US standard units, all of these units are then legally defined in terms of metric units. An inch is exactly equal to 25.4 millimetres, and so on.

5817892 Measuring cups come in 1 cup, 1/2 cup, 1/4 cup, etc. So if a recipe calls for 1 cup of flour, it's easy to cut it in half with the standard tools in your kitchen.

Celestia is now worst Princess (in this Fic)... I mean while AJ at least has a somehow good reason to keep the old system, Celestia just wanted to keep it cause they mesure things based on her Hoof, Size and Weight. :ajbemused: :facehoof:

Weird how on a story about measurement, fimfiction's word count seems to have derped up and displays the word count for the story as zero words...

A quid is just slang for a pound (in Ireland, a euro can also be referred to as a quid). The plural is also quid, so it would be two quid instead of two quids. A couple'a quid can be any small number of pounds. I'd use it for anything between two and five, but I'm sure there are people who'd pick a slightly different range.

5817990 That was weird, but not the weirdest I've seen. I've submitted a story once that showed one character tag three times over. So a few folk thought I featured Berry Punch three times in the story. Weird.

I like this story by the way.

Oh my god, the minute I saw this story title, I had to read it. Well done! :rainbowlaugh:


“If every other country in the world jumped off a cliff, would you do it, too?” asked Mrs. Cake.
Other ponies in the crowd nodded in approval. Another hoof shot up.
“Yes, Applejack?”
“The Equestrian system is tradition! Y’all can’t just go changin’ things around. It’s our national pride!”


My recipes come in cups as well, but I know that a metric cup is 250mL, so it remains easy to divide or multiply even if I don't have regular measuring cups. A metric teaspoon is 5mL and a (standard) metric tablespoon is 15mL.

As an American, I know both systems. Yes, I know our system is odd and all, but what's so hard about it? Anyone with a brain can understand it.

Now, the other types of measurements (like Newtons, Watts and all) that's a different story.


Imperial/US standard units don't run in multiples of two either, so I'm not getting your point here.

In cooking, a lot of them do. A cup is 16 (2^4) tablespoons. A pint is two cups. A quart is two pints. A gallon is 4 (2^2) quarts.

Fortunately for me, between roleplaying and the time of my education (and engineering training) I'm capable of dealing with both metric and largely imperial - at least as far as any practical and mathmatical usages go...

There is no common basis for the factors between units, that's what's hard. You actually need to memorize stuff to use the imperial system. The memory required for working with the metric system is almost non-existent in comparison.
You see, I don't need to remember how many meters a kilometer is or how many milligrams there are in a gram. It's right there in the name! And if I want to add grams to kilograms I only need to move a comma instead of doing more complex multiplications.

I don't see why anyone actually wants to use Imperial measures. It seems like more effort all around.

This is definitely a cheap shot at us Americans, but I take no issue. It's only because I've grown up on the Imperial system and am so used to it that I'd rather we don't switch to metric universally. Otherwise, I'd say switching would be a fantastic idea— metric would be exponentially easier. Hospitals use metric already— they only convert measurements to imperial for the patient's benefit.

“...for Equestria to convert to the metric system.”

The metric system is for nerds.

*mic drop* :rainbowdetermined2:

5819864 Super-geniuses like myself use both systems interchangeably while performing simultaneous measurement calculations in bases 6, 8, and 12. :twistnerd:

And that's just to keep out minds busy while we're doing easy things like building a warp drive and performing brain surgery at the same time. :twilightsmile:


A metric cup is still 16 metric tablespoons, and four cups make a litre. Yours is just flooded with extra names for every in between multiple.


That doesn't follow the basic metric pattern of multiples of ten though.

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