• Member Since 10th Mar, 2013
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SpinelStride



T

When the Windigos attacked, the ponies had to find a way to put an end to the distrust and anger that fed the frozen fiends. The unicorns found a way. No more earth ponies, no more pegasi, no more problem.

A thousand years later, Princess Twilight Sparkle thinks that her ancestors may have made a mistake. Fortunately, she knows a way to test her hypothesis. She names that way 'Rainbow Dash.'

Chapters (6)
Comments ( 91 )

This premise has intrigued me. Please, continue.

Noice. Good opening.

And, of course, no one thinks about reviving earth ponies...
derpicdn.net/img/2012/11/9/146895/medium.png
Well, maybe that's a good thing...

In any case, this is a most intriguing concept. Definitely looking forward to more.

Wouldn't a genocidal war make the Windigos more powerful?

Nommables is such a Rainbow word... :rainbowwild:

5776803

I think it's more of a predator too effective for it's own good situation. Maybe the unicorns were simply the ones that were able to hold out the longest and once they were all that was left the conflict pretty much ended and then the Windigos went away.

They look like they don't know anything about pegasi other than they existed once, and even Twilight doesn't even know how the unicorn could have possibly defeat them. My guess is that the pegasi simply were the first to starve.

In any case I really like the setting for this story, ever since season one I thought that if TS was the most magical unicorn then RD was the most magical Pegasus (before all the alicorn shenanigans anyway), I'm enjoying this take on the characters. It's also refreshing to see RD as not a typical tomboy, simply a very phisically active girl (Which I actually think fits more to what she is in the show, AJ is the real tomboy).

CCC

...well, this is an interesting start...

The summary sounds dark...

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That is a sound idea. Unicorns simply had better defense against the Windigos. Not that they were actually superior to the earth ponies and pegasi.

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There wasn't a preserved hoof or anything to get genetics from. It's not so much that Twilight didn't think of it, it's she didn't have the genetics to do it.

5776803

In the short term? Yes. Long term? It's hard to be in conflict with people who are all dead.

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Keep in mind, History is written by the victors- The History says the Unicorns won because they were the best, because the people writing the history were unicorns. The truth is probablly they won becaue they got lucky.

Faved, upvoted, and printed out so I can rub it all over my body.

Interesting, so Dash is going to meet all of her friends as unicorns. Though I am not sure Fluttershy is going to happen (though she might be the first child).

Like most things that involve making a sad Pinkie happy, this chapter brought a smile to my face.:pinkiehappy:

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Actually, a couple of them have already made their appearance by this chapter. ^_-

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I have noticed.

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Fluttershy's in there. Just look closely at the descriptions of some unicorns.

Reminds me of Game of Thrones, except without the "everybody dies!" part.

Good story, but just who was Flutters then?

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Re-read the second story, it took me two reads to notice her.

As for the other three cameos in that episode, it took the author pointing them out for me to notice. Some of them are really subtle or esoteric.

This is an incredible premise!

Interesting! I like that it's always apparent that other things are happening outside of Rainbow's worldview. Seems more realistic.

5780290 I recognized three, one well hated Pegasus and Two Apples and I am still not seeing Fluttershy!

Wonder if they can stay friends this time...I'm sure nothing horrible will happen.

I certainly wasn't expecting this to update this quickly. I'm enjoying it immensely, though. Definitely looking forward to seeing what Blueblood's done with his region. This one probably isn't going to be fun for Dash, though...

but a purely physical attack though a gap was unblocked
Shining Armor came out of the oncoming street first, a pace head of his wife

1. Through.
2. Don't you mean Ahead?

that he learned his own lesson about teaching her

1. Just some extra spacing.

When they said that the ponies making cameos would be hidden well in this story I just had yo find out. And by god some of them are ingenious that you do pass over them. Heck, some aren't given a more detailed description but you can figure it put if you slowly chain things together in a different angle. Either way, this story is off to an interesting start.

Right, forgot to ask about this line;
A variety of species were represented, both equine and non-.

Is the dash actually needed in this case to annunciate it?

These nobles are pretty shallow.

Now you're just pulling our legs with the situational puns. I almost half expect you to pull the good cop, bad cop routine some time in the future.

Even so, politics is a very thorny road to cross and the thought to be put in just to see things in such a way can be very taxing for people and I applaud you for doing it so well.

*Clap, clap.*

Nice and subtle message in this chapter. Good work.

Well, that seems to be the national tour wrapped up, though we haven't really seen how Twilight governs the Heartland. Comparisons between her methods and the other princesses and prince, yes, but not much direct data. Interesting.

Still, the setting is well established. We have the Crystal Empire largely as per the show, an economy-focused and loophole-fueled dynasty in the southeast, the province of undesirables in the undesirable southwest, and the most obsequious court and most progressive government somehow coexisting in the northwest. Now that all the players are on the board, the game can really begin...

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That I did, and thanks! Fixed.

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In this case, my understanding is that yes, it is, to signal that stated the other way, it would have been 'non-equine and equine.' It might be one of those style things like em dashes versus en dashes, where the AP manual and Chicago manual disagree, but I've always seen it as proper to leave the hyphen when you're severing a prefix from the word it would otherwise modify.

this, this one I like

please, continue

this story...

this mother bucking story...

is going on my stories to be exited about updates list

very well done

oh my gosh author what are you doing to me?

this story is just too much for me to handle in one sitting

The skulls on the walls were everything Due Respect had said. A variety of species were represented, both equine and non-. He hadn’t mentioned the dragon skull, though. Just a little one, but still, pretty cool. And they were all laid out on the walls weirdly. Dash couldn’t tell if it was magic, or just meant to look like it was magic, but either way, weird.
Princess Zecora sat on her throat, shrouded in an ornately-embroidered brown cloak. Her zebra heritage was easy to see; she had faded stripes on her flanks and her short-trimmed mane alternated white and grey stripes. Due Respect was in front of Dash, providing the introductions.

no spike!

also, zecora sat on her throat?

ha, I see what you did there with the donkies

also I love the way you have world building but I wouldn't mind a filler chapter or two in between with the caravan in between locations

You messed up the italics at some point, dear.

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Refresh and it should be fixed - something went wrong with the import that cut a couple of lines.

Queen Rainbow Dash laughed, then smiled at him. “I’ve known for months that this was coming, my little pony. Harmony needs many voices, just as discord does. In one generation, this will not be Unicornia any longer. I think I like the name… Equestria.”

Really?

Really, freaking really? :ajbemused:

You used all that wonderful world-building, such an intriguing premise, a flawed but rich world with a pitch black past...

And smack right dab back on the cannon Status Que as the 'big' ending. :facehoof:

What was even the point of all that world-building if you are going to just undo it all at the end? And no, the actual work taking decades if not centuries doesn't count; you've still made it quite clear everything will go back to normal, (in Equestria I might add) so it's still really, really freaking boring.

Honestly, 90% of this tale was RD learning about the world and the place she might one day hold in it. What's was actually the point if she ends up as a completely different social position than expected in a world that is clearly going to become unrecognizable soon?

I'm sorry, but... Wow. Been a really long time since I saw an ending ruin a story this quickly. I've changed my vote to a thumbs down.

Just... back to the Status Que, really? :facehoof::facehoof::facehoof:

Even freaking Fallout: Equestria had an rather uplifting ending that actually moved things forward, and that story takes place two hundred years after the world ended in death and fire! :flutterrage:

I'm sorry if this comes off as harsh... but you had a freaking home-run lined up, and you still managed to trip and break your teeth just shy of the freaking home-plate. I'm just... really disappointed with this pointless way to end things. :raritydespair:

“Funny, isn’t it?” the doorknob’s voice said to her. Dash whirled, but there was nopony there.

“Oh, of course, of course. But what about… not fixing the bridge?”
“You just said why that would be a bad idea,” she pointed out.

I feel as though something is missing here...

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You're right. A couple of lines didn't get imported. This is weird; it happened in a couple of other spots as well. I think next time I'm not going to rely on the 'import from GDoc' function. I don't see any more gaps now. Thanks!

Hmm. A surprising and sudden ending.

Though, I do have to wonder. If the elements were used in the past, why did they only turn the user into an alicorn, and start fixing the race imbalance this time? You would think they would refuse to work for anyone unworthy.

Also, I just had a thought about how the Riches keep their throne. Once Diamond came of age, but before she had a child to abdicate to, why wouldn't anyone challenge her? I know it is mentioned that her father would ruin them financially, but once a challenger won they would control the royal treasury. It would be a gamble to either lose everything or win everything. That would keep the higher nobles at bay, but what of the petty nobles and lower houses that have little-to-nothing to lose?

I'm not peeved like Lord of Dorkness, but it does seem odd to me.

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The previous time they were used, the genocide was still relatively recent; bringing about a rebirth of the other tribes would have engendered more hatred, not harmony. It's a situational thing. As for the Rich strategy, yes, there is a bit of risk to it - or at least a window of vulnerability when she has to stand up for herself (or have her own foal before officially reaching the age when she can rule in her own right).

Given Scott Pilgrim's reliance on video game tropes, I've been wondering how the Unicornian version might work. I have to admit, the seven evil hexes made me laugh.

Ah. So the Queen's City is, in fact, Queens. That explains what's going on in the northeast. With all the talk of the Heartland, I'd assumed it was in the center of the nation.

Rose Quartz wasn’t with them. She wasn’t powerful enough to worry about.

Probably not. But I can't help but wonder if the Riches will be eating those words...
Nah. After all Filthy's done for her, she's likely one of the few truly loyal subordinates he has.

Cadence leaned forward. “Are you seriously suggesting that the entire royal peerage enter the Everfree Tangle just because you don’t trust Twilight?”

“We bring along somepony who can escape and bring the guards to our rescue,” suggested Cadence.

I think there's a section missing here.

“Funny, isn’t it?” the doorknob’s voice said to her. Dash whirled, but there was nopony there.

“Oh, of course, of course. But what about… not fixing the bridge?”

And here.

Even with the omissions, that ending was fantastic. Especially since you confirmed my suspicions about who Due Respect was. (...and only now do I notice that character tag. :facehoof:) Thank you for this, Spinel.

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