• Member Since 2nd Nov, 2012
  • offline last seen 4 hours ago

Admiral Biscuit


he/him

E
Source

Beginning school is a difficult time for anypony, but from such a stressful environment, lasting friendships can form between the most unlikely ponies. Such is the case between Snips and Snails.


A contest entry for the 2015 EFNW Writing Contest.

With a reading by ZuesMacD

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 50 )

Adorable.

Makes me kinda sad we haven't seen more of Snips and Snails.

Nice to see some cute Snips and Snails instead of the Beavis and Butthead that they're usually reduced to.

5770687 That it is...that it is.

5770627

Adorable.

:heart:

Makes me kinda sad we haven't seen more of Snips and Snails.

The more that I think about it, the more I realize how few Snips or Snails fics I've read.

5770687

Nice to see some cute Snips and Snails instead of the Beavis and Butthead that they're usually reduced to.

I can only think of one story which actually explored Snails' character, and I've got nothing for Snips.

The opening few paragraphs feel like they belong at the head of a longer story, but other than that, it's quite a nice little tale. Though I'm not quite sure I can forgive you for distracting us with drafts of three others stories so you could get this by us. :ajbemused:

And, unlike some, I can appreciate the difference between narrative voice and character monologue. The contrast here is both well-done and immensely funny. Few are the authors who can describe an idiot with quite this complexity of syntax. Let certain unnamed pissants be pissants. They are most certainly not mollusks.

Needs more frogs (and upvotes) :)

one day he'd make his mark on Equestria as a food critic

His special talent is cutting down to size the over-inflated egos of Equestria's chefs?

Nieghpon

A slight typo here, I believe.

All in all, not bad. It's nice to see Snips 'n' Snails getting some decent fanfic treatment.

Let's eat the snail

5771080
Needs more puppydog tails.

and they were all pretty much the same.

That is so racist!

Ah, a story that finally gives these two some respect

Az, kids. So much simpler....

5770869
Well, I've seen plenty of stories in which they're explored as characters... but that doesn't necessarily imply they were more than side characters in the actual story :trixieshiftright:

Heehee. This was a lovely little story.

Snails is Neighponese! Headcanon accepted! :rainbowlaugh:

5771077

The opening few paragraphs feel like they belong at the head of a longer story

That was exactly how it came to me in a flash of inspiration. I may yet drop that part.

Though I'm not quite sure I can forgive you for distracting us with drafts of three others stories so you could get this by us.

There was a reason for that; I'll tell you why later.

<spoilered text>

Thank you!

5771156

His special talent is cutting down to size the over-inflated egos of Equestria's chefs?

That would be a very plausible interpretation for his cutie mark, actually.

A slight typo here, I believe.

Typo corrected; thank you!

It's nice to see Snips 'n' Snails getting some decent fanfic treatment.

Thanks!

5771080
I prefer slugs myself. They're also mollusks, you know.

5771162
They only do that in Prance, or so I've been told.

5771596
I wonder if anyone has written a story yet called Snips and Snails and Puppy-Dog Tails?

5771598
Especially since Snips also thinks arachnids are insects.

5771730
When I was a kid, I really wanted to be a grown-up. Now that I'm older and wiser, I want to be a kid again.

5772200

Heehee. This was a lovely little story.

Thank you!

Snails is Neighponese! Headcanon accepted!

:rainbowlaugh:

5772528

That was exactly how it came to me in a flash of inspiration. I may yet drop that part.

Well, I don't know that that's quite necessary. Especially given your record of turning one-shots into mini-series. :raritywink:

5772580

In fact there is a whole group

By the end of the first lunchtime, the class bully has emerged.

Diamond Tiara getting an early start there.

5770869

Snails has had a few appearances in the Lunaverse as his sister is an element bearer although sadly although appearing Snips has generally faded into the background. Snails more prominent roles are here, here and here

Hmm, well, this was interesting, an interesting read and look into the heads of some ponies we've seen from time to time...

5773356

In fact there is a whole group

Good to know!

Diamond Tiara getting an early start there.

Pretty much.

>> Admiral Biscuit

Snails has had a few appearances in the Lunaverse as his sister is an element bearer

Who is his sister in the Lunaverse?

5774160

Based on their similar colouration Raindrops the element of honestly (and anger issues and hidden romantic streaks) is his sister in that universe.

Neighponese? And here i was thinking Snails had other nationality, eh?

Nice take on some very underused characters - be on TV, IDW comics or FIMfiction. Liked it a lot

5774338

Neighponese? And here i was thinking Snails had other nationality, eh?

To be fair, he's only Neighponese by Snips' questionable logic.

Nice take on some very underused characters - be on TV, IDW comics or FIMfiction. Liked it a lot

Thanks!

Snips' wife thinks the residence of the Council of Friendship has no culture?

I think Snails wouldn't get the NAME Snails until AFTER he got his cutie mark.

And Diamond Tiara, while rude and entitled, has never really been seen bullying anypony but Applebloom and any foal who is a friend of Applebloom's.

All the nit picks aside. This is a beautiful and simple look at how these two could have met. And it create the image that Snails, pays attention to the little creatures that crawl on the earth.

5772552

Let's eat the snail

They only do that in Prance, or so I've been told.

And in Prance France snails are fish.
They aren't eating snails they are eating "inland fish"! ;)

http://www.fishlvr.com/2010/03/25/snails-have-unexpectedly-become-inland-fish-the-absurdities-of-the-european-union-directives/

European Commission has officially categorized snails as "inland fish" in order to allow French snail farmers to receive subsidies.

Aww, that was really cute! I loved Snips deducing Snails must be Neighponese XD it's nice to see these two getting some love :twilightsmile:

5775984

Snips' wife thinks the residence of the Council of Friendship has no culture?

Well, friendship and culture are two different things.

I think Snails wouldn't get the NAME Snails until AFTER he got his cutie mark.

I agree, actually. I've only worked that into one fic (not about Snips or Snails), but I think that a lot of ponies get their 'adult' names at their cute-cenaras.

And Diamond Tiara, while rude and entitled, has never really been seen bullying anypony but Applebloom and any foal who is a friend of Applebloom's.

Which is why I never specifically said DT was the bully in the story. Readers are free to assume it's whoever they want. I was personally imagining Hoops, even though he's never been seen in Ponyville, as far as I can recall.

All the nit picks aside. This is a beautiful and simple look at how these two could have met. And it create the image that Snails, pays attention to the little creatures that crawl on the earth.

Thank you!

5776353
Oddly, that's not the strangest regulation I've ever heard of. The legal regulations for trucks and cars in the US are just plain weird, and it's all based on the so-called "Chicken Tax."

5775984

Ponyville Confidential had her being rude to pretty much her entire staff (Featherweight, Pinchy, Shady Daze, and Truffle Shuffle) plus Dinky.

5784774

Exactly, rude not bullying.

This is quite adorable. I liked the foreshadow-y approach, as well as Snips' characterization; even the transition from the omniscent to a limited view felt alright to me. Only two things bug me a little; first of all, in the introductory part the tenses are a little mixed up. You're telling the story in past tense, so that should remain consistent.

5778871

I agree, actually. I've only worked that into one fic (not about Snips or Snails), but I think that a lot of ponies get their 'adult' names at their cute-cenaras.

This is actually the second thing. It might be debatable, but to me it seems like Snails should have gotten his cutie mark already, given how much of an expert on snails he already seems to be. From what we know, however, ponies don't get their cutie mark before they're at school age (in Cutie Mark Chronicles, RD says she'd been the first in her class to get it).

But that's picking at details and didn't affect my enjoyment of the story.

This title is true. Also, very nicely written.:twilightsmile:

Official EFNW Pre-Con Contest 2nd Round Review

This one made me smile. A lot. It's a fun idea, with fun characters, pulled off very nearly flawlessly. It'll definitely be one of my top picks. I never thought I would enjoy reading a Snips/Snails story... it's not enough to get them off my worst pone list, but it was definitely enough to make it a surprisingly enjoyable read. It's a fun look inside Snips' head, done with enviable style and expertise.

People don't seem to understand that terrestrial mollusks can drown.

But.. but.. we never found out WHY the Neighponese are starving! My bits are on the horrible god lizard that emerges from the sea every few years and stomps through the major cities. It must be hell on their economy.

6045101

My bits are on the horrible god lizard that emerges from the sea every few years and stomps through the major cities. It must be hell on their economy.

That's probably exactly the reason.
:rainbowlaugh:

This was fun. I loved the simple child logic throughout.

When I read this part:
So it was, in this tumultuous time of change, that a chubby stallion bravely crossed the grassy playground towards his future friend.
He didn't set out with the intention of forming a friendship that would last beyond cutie marks and first dates and graduation and getting a job and moving to Manehattan because his wife insisted that there was no culture in Ponyville; no, he was just curious, and he hadn't yet learned that sometimes curiosity is not rewarded in the public education system.

Calling him a stallion implied adulthood, and the stream-of-consciousness about his possible future wife's opinions, taken together, had me going back to re-read it and confirm that this was indeed Snips, the young colt, being discussed...
Fortunately, I really enjoy my mind being boggled occasionally. :rainbowhuh: <Whoa! Awesome!)

"He's yellow, starving, and has a funny accent. ... Must be from Neighpon."

7669965

"He's yellow, starving, and has a funny accent. ... Must be from Neighpon."

It's a perfectly logical conclusion from the data given.

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