• Published 26th Mar 2015
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Slow Fade - Bluegrass Brooke



"What you get out of life is all about your attitude." Thrown into the bitter reality of corporate Manehattan, Pinkie learns the hard way that attitude can only go so far. Can Pinkie overcome such cruelty, or will it consume her?

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The Desert Soul

[This chapter contains strong language and mature themes. Reader discretion is advised.]


Milo had rarely felt so trapped; as if the combined weight of his wrongdoings had finally come to a head. The only way to release the pressure? Talk. Talk like he had not done for year. Perhaps then he could find some relief from the nightmares that plagued him.

He looked into the child’s eyes—patient, understanding. After a long breath, he spoke in a hoarse whisper, “Rory’s condition—this damn case . . . it’s all my fault."

Panic flickered across her face before being replaced with that celestial patience once more. “Milo, I don’t think—”

“Let me speak! Please.” Before I lose the strength. “I know Starlight—Rory’s mother,” he added as an aside, “for many years before Rory was born. Back then she was a different mare. She had that spark, you know?” He closed his eyes, allowing the memory to take hold. “A spark that never should have gone out . . .”


“Milooooo!”

Milo Coltfax turned his ears to the culprit disturbing his study of Business Law texts. Sure enough, Starlight appeared, coat glistening like molten gold in the glaring summer sun. Milo involuntarily caught his breath. “Ye-yes?”

Starlight giggled, lying down across from him on the grass. “Ye-yes?” she mimicked in that all-too playful manner of hers. “I came to drag you back to the present.” With a flourish, she whipped open her saddlebags and withdrew a neatly folded brochure. “Es Voila!”

Milo drew the brochure closer.

‘Runway like you’ve never seen before. Aspiring young models will display their talents at the biggest event of the season. Don’t miss out! Book your company’s slot today.’

He scanned the names at the bottom of the brochure, feeling his heart skip a beat when he caught it.

‘Starlight Streak’

“You got in!” Without really thinking about it, he gave her a quick hug. Her body tensed for only an instant before she relaxed.

“Yes, well, I have been practicing for ages, Milo.” Uncertainty washed over her delicate features.

Milo brushed away her forelock gently with a hoof. “You’ll do great,” he whispered. “You always do.”

“I know, it’s just—” Her attention drifted towards the campus art department’s building. “It’s a collab effort. Spice is designing my dress.”

A mental image of the plump, cheery mare came into focus. She might not be a looker, but she was honest and talented. “She’ll do fine, Starlight.”

“What if she makes me some Little House on the Prairie outfit or something?” Starlight moaned, burying her face into her hooves. “This is my big debut!”

There she goes again. “Starlight, if I told you once, I told you a thousand times, it’s not always about you. Think about Spice. It’s her debut too. I’m sure she’ll do her best.”

“And what if her best isn’t good enough, what then, hmmm?”

Milo cringed, grateful that Starlight wasn’t running the department. “Then I’ll help you find another venue.” He patted her head, “Don’t worry. You’ll be Manehattan’s shining star in no time.”

She giggled, burrowing her face into his chest. “I’m holding you to it, tiger.”


Two weeks later . . .

Milo did not know what to expect. A call? The cold shoulder? An ambush the evening after with a complete—and boring—rundown? Yes, probably that. But nothing. Absolutely nothing. Whenever he tried to visit Starlight at her dorm, she would call “Busy!” And just like that, he would leave.

He saw her a few times on the way to class, but again, she was always in a rush. What for? Her debut must have gone well, or she would have ranted about it to him. At least, he hoped it went well. Milo glanced around at the darkened halls, hoping she would appear like always. Out of habit rather than common sense, he staggered towards the design department. Maybe she was checking up on her latest outfit?

He followed the narrow sliver of light at the end of the hall. Cautiously, he enveloped the handle in his magic and pushed the door open. “Starlight?”

There was a soft squeak then a cinnamon blur shot up from behind a nearby pile of fabric. He chuckled at the round-faced pegasus fluttering just above the chaos. “Spice? What are you doing here so late?”

“I could ask you the same thing,” she squeaked, landing clumsily in front of him. She blew a strand of curly blonde mane out of her eyes. “Sooooo, looking for Starlight?”

“How did you know?” he drawled playfully, glancing around the room. Chaos did not even cut it. How anypony moved let alone worked in here was beyond him. “I haven’t seen her in almost two weeks. How is she?”

“She um . . . I mean she’s . . .” Spice bit her lip, prancing in place.

“Oh come on! You’re her roommate, surely she said something to you.”

“Well yes but,” her voice lowered until it was barely audible, “I don’t think you’ll like it.”

“What?” His blood ran cold. What? What wouldn’t he like? “Tell me! Please,” he added on as an afterthought.

“At the debut Starlight me-met this stallion. He’s a business pony. Youngest CEO of Scribe Incorporated’s history. And well . . . Starlight told me he was her ‘ticket’ or something like that.”

Milo staggered backwards, toppling over the nearest pile of supplies. No . . . no. Deep down he knew this would happen, knew it from the start. But he also knew her dignity would weigh out over desire for fame and she would come back to him. It just hurt. Milo lowered his ears, backing out of the room. “Thank you, Spice. I guess I’ll be going now.”

“Wait! I—you . . . would you like to stay a while?” Spice stammered, looking down at the ground.

Perfect. He would give Starlight a piece of her own medicine. Then he’d have the ammunition when she came crawling back to him. I just have to play my cards right.


Milo settled onto the foot of the bed, avoiding eye-contact with Pinkie. “I was an idiot back then, Pinkie.”

“You were young,” she said gently, taking a swig from the pitcher beside the bed. “I don’t think that makes you a bad pony, Milo.”

“Well now, missy. You haven’t heard the whole story.” Gritting his teeth, he managed to continue. “Once Starlight started chasing after Storm Scribe, she changed and not for the best. She used to love her modeling, but she was slowly becoming obsessed with it. She stopped talking to me or Spice and that . . . that opened up the doors for other issues.

Spice was a nice mare. I guess you could call her ‘homely.’ I never really loved her, and I still don’t. I kept stringing her along in the hopes Starlight would get jealous, but she never did. We graduated, and I kept dating Spice.

After some time, I decided I might was well marry her.”

“That was it?” Pinkie’s eyes grew wide. “You ‘might as well marry her?’ What about love or—or passion?”

Milo shook his head. “It really was more out of obligation, Pinkie. I had been stringing her along so long, it felt horrid to just drop her there. Besides, at that time, Starlight was moving up in the ranks. I couldn’t get her attention, so I settled for Spice’s.”

He fidgeted with the worn cover, wondering. “Maybe I was lonely too. I don’t know. It was a long time ago, Pinkie . . .”

She only nodded, looking down at her hooves.

“After I married Spice, I started to hear about Storm Scribe. He’s notorious in the legal circle and not for anything good. I decided I would warn Starlight. That . . . that didn’t go so well.”


Milo felt as if he had been drug out of a frigid river and asked to stand trial the next instant. In a way, he supposed it was true. A trial with an utterly unfeeling jury. He raised his hoof tapping it lightly against the polished wood. A few years ago, visiting Starlight—his Starlight in such a place would have set his heart alight. Now it dug like a dull knife in a wound.

“Starlight? I know you’re home.”

Silence then, “So you’ve tracked down my schedule again. Typical,” she spat. From the sound of her voice, she was just on the other side of the door.

“Can we talk?”

“I’ve got a meeting.”

“At four. Come on. I didn’t walk all this way in the rain to talk through a damn door.”

Amber light surrounded the handle before the door swung gently open. Starlight’s less than amused face greeted him. Milo had to catch his breath at the sight. She did not glow, but radiated light from the impossibly smooth hairs gracing her delicate frame. And yet, Milo had never seen the mare so ugly. The eyes, he reflected dully. The spark had intensified—not with kindness, but rather like the keen edge of a knife.

Starlight glided over to a lounge, sprawling out like an empress taking audience.

Milo sat across from her on the over-stuffed ottoman. Their heavy silence grew until he thought it might snap from the tension.

At long last, Starlight spoke in a rather off-hoof manner. “How is she?”

“Wh-who?” he stammered stupidly.

She rolled her eyes, pointing to the ring on his horn. “The wife.”

Milo bit his lip. “Like you give a damn.”

“My my! Forgetting common courtesy as always I see.” She levitated a glass of lemonade to her lips, sipping daintily. “I hear she’s hoping for a foal.”

“Fat chance of that.”

The corner of Starlight’s mouth turned upwards in an intrigued manner. “As I thought. You or her?”

Milo bristled, but relented under her withering glare. “Both . . .”

Starlight gave a false laugh that set his skin crawling. The one she vowed never to use on him again. “To think you’d be the kind of husband to slip birth control to his wife while she’s taking fertility drugs! How delightful. Do you put it in her morning scone? That cow could never resist—”

“Shut the hell up! You don’t know a damn about it.”

“Please. I’ve become quite the master of this game of yours, Milo. A bat of the eye here, a pleasant comment there . . . why I’m sure we could snag just about any pony in our webs if we tried hard enough. Though your choice of targets leaves much to be desired. I very much doubt the dowry was anything to sniff at.”

“It’s not always about the money.”

“Oh my mistake!” Despite the clear lack of mirth in her laugh, it grabbed at him in a way Spice’s never could. “Pity is it?”

Milo gritted his teeth. “Obligation,” he breathed.

“Please, you don’t owe anything to the likes of her. Live for yourself, Milo, because nopony else will.”

“Speaking of . . .” Milo levitated the envelope from his saddlebags, placing them on the coffee table. “If you’re really looking out for yourself, I suggest you find another golden egg. This one’s more of a sword.”

Milo waited, watching as Starlight scanned the documents. “I think you’re wrong there, Milo.” A wicked snarl marred her once sublime features. “This one’s definitely a wolf.”

Milo shot to his hooves, overturning the table. “Quit fucking around, Starlight! He’s bad news. You want to die?”

“Please.” She snorted. “As if he’d have the balls.”

Milo kicked the wall with enough force to set her cringing. “He’s killed before, Starlight. He’ll do it again because he doesn’t feel—not love, not respect for life. Nothing! He’s fucked up, Starlight. Get the hell away from him!”

Starlight rose, pinning her ears. “If you’re so infallible, then you fight him off me! ‘The good always triumph,’ isn’t that what you always say? Or are you so attached to that bitch that you wouldn’t dare try?”

“I won’t listen to this.” Milo strode to the door, not bothering to look behind him. “It’s your funeral . . .”


Milo closed his eyes, fighting the inevitable tears that threatened to break through his stoic persona. “Sorry, Pinkie . . . I know this is a lot.”

“It’s . . . it’s okay, Milo.” Her voice sounded strained now, as if fighting the urge to speak her mind. “Sooo, what happened next?”

“She went for it. Finally got the money, fame, and status she craved since we were kids in school. But, it came at a price. Only took her two years being married to him to figure that out. When it all came down, she ran to me. Just like always. And,” he took a long, deep breath, “just like a thousand times before, I couldn’t say no . . .”


Milo never felt quite as liberated as when Spice went on her summer visit. Each year like clockwork, she took a month off to visit the extended family. It presented the perfect opportunity to play catch up on legal obligations and to stop taking the pills that made his head swim.

He settled down amidst the pile of paperwork—a master in his element. These cases would be cleared in a matter of days or his name wasn’t Milo Colftax. Just as the thought crossed his mind, the door swung open with a brilliant amber glow. Starlight? His heart stopped as the mare staggered inside.

How long had it been since he had seen her in this state? Ten years or more . . . The perpetual air of confidence had vanished along with any clothing. Here in his entryway stood the real Starlight. He had strode over to her before he could quite register his hooves taking him there. “Starlight? Wha—what are you doing here?”

“I came to see you,” she breathed softly, actually nuzzling him under the chin.

Milo was certain a visible shiver had run through his body at that instant. The contact he had only dreamt about for years now. He instinctively returned the gesture. “I appreciate your leaving the get-up behind.”

She giggled softly—naturally he noted with satisfaction. “I guess.”

Reality finally kicked Milo in the rump as he noted the goddess in his run-down shack of an apartment. “What are you doing here, Starlight?”

“Hmmm? What, I can’t visit an old friend every once in awhile?”

“If you were the type to visit ‘old friends,’ you would have done it a hell of a lot earlier. You came here when you knew Spice wasn’t home . . . what gives?”

The cold, sickening quality returned to her eyes in an instant. “Storm.”

“Oh? You’re just now realizing? I told you about him years ago, Star!”

She stamped her hoof, avoiding his gaze. “That I can can deal with this however . . . He only just started this.”

This?” Milo felt his gut twist. “What?”

“He’s got it into his head that he wants one.”

“One what?”

Starlight sighed, flicking her tail across his rump. “You of all ponies should know about that, Milo. I’m sure Spice hasn’t given up.”

“So he wants a foal . . . big deal.” Though he had to admit, Starlight was the last mare in Equestria to fall into the category of mother figure. “It’s the price you paid when you married that bastard.”

“It’s not that simple,” she ground out. Her eyes focused on the carpet’s nearest stain. “He kept trying and trying, so I decided to pull for some answers. Took a few months, but I finally squeezed it out of one of them.”

Milo raised his eyebrow.

“Turns out Storm can’t have foals. He’s sterile. Of course none of the doctors are stupid enough to tell him that, so they make up bullshit and pass it off to him.”

“Your point?”

Starlight raised her head, staring coldly into his eyes. “Isn’t it obvious? He blames me! Every damn night he forces me to—to . . .” Tears rolled down her cheeks. “I’m tired of it, Milo. Sick and tired of it.”

Milo felt a momentary twinge of empathy for the mare. “Starlight . . . you can still leave him. I’ve got family in Neighjersey. I could call in a few favors and—”

“No! I can’t, Milo! Not when I’m so close. I’m the top model in Manehattan. I’ve got hordes of mares lining up to work for me. I’ve started my own fashion line. It’s a dream come true!”

“And how much is that dream worth?”

He saw the answer in her eyes, it did not take him to see it. “What do you want?” he managed softly.

“You know.”

“I want you to say it, Starlight! Tell it to me straight or you can go to hell.”

A shy air came over her, one he had not seen since their days in high school—a faint glimpse of the real Starlight. It broke his heart. “I . . . you . . . you’re a unicorn. I’m a unicorn. I thought, maybe . . . if we,” she gulped, looking down at the floor, “if you would father the foal then Storm would be none the wiser.”

“So I’m just a stud to you, is that it?”

Starlight shook her head. “No! You’re the only one—the only one I’d ask, Milo! Please . . . It has to be you.”

It took only a second’s thought. “Fine. But not here . . .”


Pinkie’s gasp broke his narrative in an instant. He turned to see the horror in her eyes as she lept off the bed. “No no no no no! It can’t be! You’re lying. Why would you? You’re the good pony!”

“Pinkie . . . surely you’ve learned by now that there’s no such thing as a ‘good’ pony.”

She shook her head, snorting. “No! There’s always a good pony.” He could see the conviction burned into her eyes. “You’re . . .” There was a soft thud as her knees hit the chipped floorboards. “I trusted you.”

“What? To be honest? I have been.”

“But it—it hurts! Why does it always hurt?”

“I don’t . . . don’t know, Pinkie. I wish to Celestia I did, but I don’t.”

He waited for her to regain some composure. After what must have been ten minutes of silence, she returned to her position on the bed. “What happened next? Did you—did you try to take him away?”

Milo sighed, fighting the bile in his throat. “No—no. Starlight . . . she wouldn’t let me near him. Didn’t want to risk it.”

“‘Risk it?’ He’s your son, isn’t he? What kind of father leaves their son to the likes of that?”

What kind indeed . . . It took all his remaining courage to speak up again. “I didn’t know about the abuse, Pinkie. If I had, nothing would have stopped me from taking him back with me.”

“You should have noticed the leg at least!”

“I wasn’t in Manehattan at the time, Pinkie! I . . . had been chased out by then. Surely Rory told you about that.”

“No-No . . . I heard rumors but . . . what happened?”

“Storm decided he’d had enough. Decided the best way to silence me for good was to play me at my own game. I lost big time. Nearly cost Spice’s family their living in the process. We divorced after that. I got into the booze and left for greener pastures. If I hadn’t met Quill . . . well, that’s for another time.”

He got to his hooves, stepping back towards the living room. “I’m going to fix this, Pinkie. I swear on what’s left of my miserable existence I’ll save him.”

“You could have saved him before,” she snapped.

“I . . . failed, Pinkie. But I won’t again. Let me act like a father just this once.”

She eyed him for a moment before her lips parted in a weak smile. “Sure, Milo. But promise me you’ll tell him after, mmmkay?”

“I promise.” It’s all I can do for now . . .


Author's Note:

Big reveal time! Weeeee.

Aaaanywho, FINALLY finished this chapter. I wrote it in 2 days believe it or not. I just was too lazy to work on it until now. Next will be coming . . . someday.

There's probably a lot of editing boo boos in this one, so feel free to point them out. This is my writing at midnight quality after all . . .