They Call Her Rainbow Dashie Ocean
“Rainbow Dash, if you're... if y-you're insinuating that we somehow... extort the Syndicate, then I must protest,” Theanim Mane stammered. “Not only is the idea extremely dangerous, but I find it rather below us.”
“Well it's not below me,” Echo muttered, lounging in the corner of the hotel room. “Buck those guys. They trade bits for blood and they bomb their own city's citizens.”
“Damn straight!” Bard said with a smirk. “I like yer grit, bat pony!”
Echo merely glared at the stallion.
“Pffft... fine...” Bard tilted his stetson back and shrugged. “Maybe we all can't be friends.”
“If we were to get the proper authorities to observe what's going on here, then perhaps we can make a difference!” Theanim exclaimed. “We could contact Princess Camellia! Or I could write my fellow scientists serving the Order in Central Rohbredden!”
“Doc... face it...” Rainbow sighed. “This city is out of control. The only law that matters here is whatever can be bought or paid through the Syndicate.” She pointed that the Sarosian. “Now, your buddy here has a huge price on his head with the Southern Hoof.” She glanced at the two mercenaries. “Who wants to bet that the local Syndicate Boss wants to pay a hefty fee to secure him before the Western Consortium does?”
Wildcard and Bard exchanged glances. “Well... sure!” Bard said. “They were offerin' five thousand bits! But that's a mite bit paltry compared to what the ponies at Mud Top were willin' to hoof over. Guess it goes to show just how much the bit dealers around here are hurtin'.” Wildcard nodded.
“Alright, so... the ponies of the Northern Hoof are willing to offer bits for Echo,” Rainbow said. “The ponies of the Southern Hoof are willing to give even more bits.” She paced about, shuffled to a stop, and faced the others with a firm gaze. “...what if we found a way to collect on everything while giving them nothing?”
“Hah!” Echo belched, leaning his head back with a sigh. “I'd say you were high. And that comin' from me...”
“No no no no I'm serious...” Rainbow glanced at her two marefriends and gestured shile speaking: “Imagine us being able... to make it look like we're turning Echo in... only to back out at the last second.”
“You lost me at 'imagine,' darlin',” Bard droned. “The ponies here don't settle for half-jobs. Either they get the pony they've targeted or they don't.”
“Are you willing to bet that their desperation will let them put their guard down?”
“Huh?”
Rainbow looked at Theanim Mane. “Tell me, Doc... since you've dealt with the ponies who own this platform city before... if you're living out here... running a city that sits on the ocean... and you run into economic problems...” Her eyes narrowed. “...where do you hoarde all your funds? Do you keep them in floating, invisible accounts?”
“Well, I'd say not!” Theanim exclaimed. “When you're the Syndicate, you're never short on friends or enemies, and the bitter irony is that both could want a piece of their shareholdings back at any time.”
“So... what'd you do with your remaining money?”
Theanim blinked.
“You'd store it away someplace physical,” Echo yawned. “Somewhere close to home.”
“Ya mean like a vault?” Bard remarked.
“They have one, if that's what you're asking,” Echo said.
“How does he know this?” Rarity asked.
“And just how do you know this, buddy?” Rainbow inquired.
Echo shifted the weight of his cloak around his shoulders and squinted across the way. “I've been in and out of the Syndicate's Hold here, remember? I've worked several jobs for them throughout the years. It's how I've been able to avoid their sight right under their very own noses these past few months. Even their shadows I know by heart.”
“Then you'd know where inside the Syndicate's Hold they would have all of their remaining money hidden away?” Rainbow asked. “Including that which they'd draw from to pay a hoof-full of bounty hunters?”
“Wait...” Bard and Wildcard were both leaning intently forward. “Are you goin' were we think yer goin' with this?”
Rainbow smirked. “If you ask me, the Syndicate sounds like a bunch of losers. They yank hapless souls around like puppets and they make life miserable for their own citizens here.”
“Nevertheless, it's a system that's worked like a charm for ages,” Theanim said.
“Yeah, well, I'm sorry, Doc, but it's a sucky system.”
Theanim shrugged. “I certainly didn't say that I agreed with it, Miss Dash. I'm just concerned for the repercussions of whatever it is you might be suggesting.”
“Well, I'm not,” Rainbow said with a frown. “Things here in Syndicate are totally, completely un-awesome. And I can't stand for lame stuff. Something tells me I'm not alone.” She pointed out the window. “You saw how angry and frustrated those citizens got earlier today! When the tiniest amount of chaos broke out in their city, all they wanted to do was buck down the doors to the local Boss' headquarters! If you ask me, I think the ponies who've lived this long with the Syndicate's bullcrap would be more than happy to see them collapse. I bet everyone else would be able to run this platform city better without them, and the Syndicate's Boss knows this. That's why he's bombing the ever loving crap out of them—to spread fear, intimidation, and a sense of importance.”
“Pretty on the spot, fruitilicious,” Echo slurred. He glanced at Theanim. “You know, she's not half as stupid as I first thought, Theams.”
Theanim Mane sighed and looked tiredly at Rainbow. “Then what is it you propose?”
“Isn't it obvious?” Rainbow grinned. “We turn Echo into the Syndicate here.”
Echo instantly shuddered. “Alright, I take that back. She's a total toilet-diver.”
“Naw... give her some leaf-ear, buckaroo.” Bard trotted forward. “Yer suggestin' some sort of bait-and-switch, ain'tcha?”
“We make it look like we're offering them something,” Rainbow Dash said. “But, in fact, we'll just be getting them to lower their guard.” She grinned at Twilight, Rarity, and then the others. “And when we least expect it, we do the impossible.”
“Don't you mean the stupid?” Twilight droned.
Rainbow waved the spectre off and paced through her. “We make the impossible happen. We steal Echo back when they least expect it. And then, not only do we make off with the earnings that they give us for the bat-dude, but we take all their dirty money away from them!”
“And do what with it?” Theanim asked.
“What else?” Rainbow tilted her chin up with a smirk. “We speed our butts to Shoggoth with it. We get those ponies to lower their guard, and then we do the same with them. Not only will we have swept the rug out from underneath the Syndicate here in Rust, but we will have gotten the Muddredging Southern Hoof to expose themselves as well. And once we've exploited both factions of their ugliest qualities, we run to Princess Camellia with the evidence of what's been taking place here and abroad: the extortion, the arson, the filthy connections to Mudtop—all of it!. And if Camellia respects the union of earth ponies and sirens, then—for Verlaxion's sake—she'll move to have the Syndicate disassembled altogether. Everypony wins. Well... every self-respecting pony, that is.”
“And... erm...” Bard fidgeted. “...the bits?”
Rainbow shrugged. “I guess the spoils go to the ones who do all the spoiling. Not like there'll be any Syndicate left to scrape it all up.”
“Whew-weee!” Bard raised his wing high and slapped it against Wildcard's. “I'm likin' what you've got percolatin' underneath them cowlicks, girl!”
“But wait... Miss Dash... honestly...” Theanim Mane gawked. “...I'm all for karma and sweet justice, but how are we even going to accomplish such subterfuge?”
Rainbow shrugged. “I'm... uh... I'm getting to that part.”
“Hah!” Echo barked, causing a few cracks to form in the patio window.
Theanim rubbed his muzzle, sighing. “You do realize, Miss Dash, this proposal will be exceedingly difficult to accomplish... beyond the efforts of taking down a mindless sea serpent.”
“I never said it'd be the easy way of fixing things.” She smirked past her ghostly friends at the two mercenaries. “But, it depends on just what kind of dirty, cheating tacticians we have on our side.”
Bard and Wildcard exchanged glances. Bard smirked at the others while gesturing at himself. “I play guitar with my wings.” He pointed at Wildcard. “Dubya-Cee here plays harmonica with a beak.” He arched an eyebrow. “Do we look like the kind of folks who fancy doin' thangs the easy way...?”
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She's the F to the R to the U I T and ain't no other pony flies east like her. She's Fruitilicious.
Not with that attitude!
You learn fast, Twilight. You learn fast.
This is gonna be good.
I loved this episode of Deep Space Nine.
Wait, um...
ten 8-count pushups, ):(! Knock 'em out!
Okay, now I am REALLY looking forward to what's coming.
See Twilight.. Dash know's how to word things so that others help her.
Also, cleaning out all the bits of both Syndicates? That's gotta be a couple million bits easy.
I get the feeling I'm missing the reference in the chapter title though.
-Memories given light, ease a lonely flight. Ynanhluutr.
So the plan is to rob not one but two mob vaults, pretty much ensuring they'll be hunted wherever they go. With the entire plan depending on Camellia not being somehow in league with either syndicate. This has to be Rainbow's dumbest idea yet...
...I love it!
6168712 My guess is that the title is a reference to the film, Ocean's 11. The plot involves a gang who attempt to rob five Vegas casinos in a single night. When that film was made (1960), casinos were still run by mobsters. There was a George Clooney remake in 2001 (plus several sequels).
6168799 Ah. Okay, thanks for that.
6168770
What does she have to worry about? I highly doubt these mob bosses will chase her over the edge and to the dark side of the plane. Since when do villains attempt to chase heroes to the ends of the earth?
6168770
Well then it's bound to work, and culminate with a big enough kersplosion in the third act to give Mister Bay an inexplicable feeling of warm fuzzies!
...Eeeheehee! I call her Rainbow Dashie cute fuzzywuzzy little blue pegasus who needs to have adorable fuzzcuddles with Miss Orange Drawlsalot McFreckleface!
...
Uh...
I'm going to go do those pushups!
6168824 To clarify even further: The ring leader was Danny Ocean (Frank Sinatra in the original, Clooney in the remake). Both versions are quite good, though the original, not surprisingly, was somewhat better. Both versions were loaded with A-list celebrities of their day.
6168847 Appledashery?
Oh, you poor, misguided fools, underestimating Rainbow Dash's ability to pull of the
stupidimpossible.-Spirit (Yeast and Treacle)
6168861
If I referenced that, it was a coincidence. Been slowly moving my way through it. Currently got a pile of books on one side of my room, and a pile of fanifcs to read on my computer. Over the past month, I'm only at the Buffalo cave thing.
.
..
...
buffalo.
Ermahgerd, I can't believe it took me so long to realize!
Dubya-Cee --> double-u c --> WC --> Wildcard.
I'm slow af.
If things get too hairy, couldn't Echo just scream his way out? Earplugs are essential.
fight the invincible, do the impossible
roaw roaw ! fight the powa !
And then Princes Camellia was in on it all along, or something. I would say I can't see this going well, but east horse is east horse. She will prevail somehow.
This plan would be much easier if Ebon was still kicking around.
6168901 You can hardly be blamed for missing that one with all the diarrhea-related jokes of late.
This plan seems messy, convoluted, and risky.
I like it.
If it's not stupid, it doesn't work. Thus, if its stupid, like robbing every cartel in the vicinity, then it must work.
I really must say, I am curious as to what our good bat friend has done to piss off everyone, but in particular, I want to know what he did to piss off his own kind.
6168678 T don't rhyme with her. Maybe it should be "she"
Dammit, this is what happens when you have the 4th of July. You miss chapters and have to wait 5 hours to read them, even though you KNOW that they're just sitting there, waiting for you.
I don't wanna watch stuff explode; I wanna read about stuff exploding!
6168847
Shell?
6168875
Buffalo.
That plan sounds like a distaster waiting to happen... When do we start?
6168847 I guess I should have said they'll be hunted throughout Rohbredden. I have a feeling Dash is going to have bigger problems once she gets to the dark side with the whole three way World War thing going on there.
6168875 Man, I really need to start that story. I've been meaning to for awhile but between work, friends, and other random things that pop up I've barely had time to stay caught up with Austraeoh.
Heh heh heh...
6168875 Buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo
So, embark upon a dangerous mission? Certainty of death, small chance of success - what are we waiting for?!
"This is the dumbest, most suicidal thing I've ever heard."
"So... that's a no?"
"HELL no! Let's do this!"
One and the same, Twilight. One and the same.
I love the smell of Heist in the morning.
Well, now we know where the story is going for the next 40 chapters.
The mare with a plan. Not bad.
6169747
cdn.nerdapproved.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/ned2-e1349305305124.jpeg?bbba63
She is the diddly-dang disaster.
Well, what else goes down in Venice when planning a robbery?
The Italian Job?
Sad souls indeed.
6168849 Loaded with mob-affiliated A-list actors... like Frank Sinatra.
6172380 Yeah, ironic, isn't it?
This is a rather elaborate and dangerous plan, that means it will work perfectly. Well as perfectly as Dash's plans usually go anyway.
I love how this plan just avoids any explanation of the part where they steal Echo and the bits.
Let's go rob some banks.
My eyebrows just fell off from all the wiggling.
Yep, Rainbow is going full Robin Hood now. This should be fun.
6168847 One word: Shell
No, no you do not.
(Oh sweet Celestia and Luna above! Bard has stole my heart!)
I'm kind of wondering if this whole plan will turn into Flank from Project Horizons, where Blackjack's efforts to help get rid of the druglords in charge only led to an arguably worse group of ponies taking charge and doing the exact same thing.
Probably not though. Harmony happens real quick when Rainbow is involved.
Woo, My favorite part of almost every Arc, It's time for something stupid.
Stupid plan. I approve.
6207423 That's how we know it will work.
Stupid and impossible are the best types of plans