Adventures of Diamond Dancer (Mission Logs)

by RarityEQM

Training: Balance

These are the training sessions I go through to stay in tip top shape for the Night Crew. Being a part of the night crew is kinda like special forces. See, we don't do situps and wing-pushups, or stuff like that. No jogging, or military minded exercises. No no. Ours (and mine) are a bit more...creative.

I didn't know what they were talking about. I didn't really care. Politics. Bleh. Something about the Gryphon Empire and the Crystal Empire, and the Cervine Provinces. Blah blah blah. All they talk about in the castle are politics. Not the guards, though. They don't talk. Just the princess and whatever guest she's speaking with.

It was always the same, really. Each and every single time. You'd think spending time in Canterlot Castle would be exciting, or interesting, but the sad truth of the matter, is that every single day here is mind numbingly boring.

I twitch, and fidget and shuffle my rump back and forth across the perfectly polished floors, while the Princesses talk. And talk. And talk. And talk. And talk. And talk. And talk. And talk. And talk. And talk. And talk. You think that's a lot of talking? You haven't spent a day in Canterlot Castle, then.

Personally, I can't stand it. It makes me crazy. It's boring and I have to move, I have to go somewhere, I have to DO something...but I can't. I sit there, bored out of my skull, listening to politics that don't interest me in the slightest. But thats the training. That's the whole point. I pretend I'm a gargoyle, still as a statue, watching ponies come and go. I can't feel anything, so this is good practice for balance, says Firefly. Also for my attention span. Humph. She's right though.

Next to Princess Celestia I remain, perfectly still and silent. I can't exactly feel the weight on my head since I don't have feeling there, but I'm certain that she's placed the tea cup down. Thats right. Diamond Dancer. Miracle Mare, Fantastic Filly, and tea table for Princess Celestia. I keep my focus as best I can. When she moves, I move. The job is to stay by Celestia's side for the afternoon, and remain perfectly still, balancing this little plastic tray on my head while the princess yabbers on and on and on. I use my eyes and ears to maintain balance, which doesn't really make sense, but it works for me. I keep a fixated point in the room, and my eyes level with it. It's hard to describe, but the point is, I spilled the tea three or for times. Not too bad, says Firefly.

Sometimes the Princess and I talk, while she's signing papers and things. I don't know much about Celestia, but she always seems charming and cheerful. She's very relaxed, I guess I would put it. Kind of a stark contrast to Princess Luna. I try to stay still when I answer my questions, but I'm guessing this is part of the balance training too. Talking and holding still. She asks me about where I grew up, what the Manehatten slums are like, how I got my cutiemark, if I have any crushes on any ponies in ponyville, how do I get my mane to stay up the way it does. I ask her what sensations are like. Difficult questions. She said she never had to describe the sun warming you on a gentle summer day. I guess I'll never know exactly what she's talking about.

These are somewhat less strenuous sessions than battle techniques or point precision flying. But boring. Super duper boring. Bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored...

Shoot! I fell asleep and spilled the tea. And now I get to start all over again. Awesome. I think this is gonna take a while, soooo I'm gonna end this here. Next time I'll talk about battle training! That's the fun stuff!