8 - He Comes
Time passed dully, livened up with time well-spent with his friends. Silver wasn't permitted to leave the room often, a fact that began to drive him a little crazy. The books they brought helped a little, and he read about magic he couldn't use or places he couldn't see.
One evening, while waiting for Night or Fast to return, a soft thump came from the door. Silver slipped to the floor and approached slowly. His legs refused to carry him quickly, and the chill of the air bit at him readily without the fur coat he had grown so used to. On the plus side, he got itchy a lot less often. He stared at the door a moment, but no magic hands would appear to throw it open. He grumbled as he reached for the knob with his mouth and pulled the door open. The moment the latch was free, the door fell inwards, shoving Silver back as the greyish form of Fast Change fell over into the room.
Silver squeaked loudly and rushed around the door to get to Fast, "What's wrong?"
"Found him," she said weakly.
Silver tried to haul her towards her bed. With their combined muted strength, they made slow progress. By the time Silver heaved her up onto the bed, he ended up collapsed against it. A quick glance confirmed that Fast's cutie mark was gone. "Are you OK?"
Fast snorted softly, "No, but I could be worse I guess."
Silver climbed up on the bed just to flop over onto it. His own bed felt like it was a thousand miles away. "How did you run into him? I didn't even think he'd be around yet."
Fast shrugged softly, "He was creeping around, uh... It's hard to remember much."
Silver flopped over to face Fast, "I'm glad you made it back."
Fast smiled at Silver, "As if I'd be pathetically weak without company?" Silver held out a hoof, and Fast met it, though they struck with insufficient force to make the clop sound.
Night arrived an hour later to find them napping. She quickly noticed Fast's drained colors, and the fact that they were sleeping on the covers instead of under them, and where did Fast's cutie mark go? She set the meal she had brought aside and approached the two, nudging them awake, "What's going on? Did you try giving Silver his magic back?"
Silver blinked, "Does that work?"
Fast snorted softly, "Doubt it. I ran into whatever it was." Fast made an uncertain gesture as she looked without moving her head up at Night, "When'd you get back?"
Night smiled nervously, "Just now... I should report this..." She stepped back, then paused, "Want some food?" She fed them first, tucking them into the sheets carefully afterwards before she quietly scurried off to find a princess.
Fast flashed a brief smile at Silver, "Got you under the blanket, and we're not doing anything."
Silver snorted softly. With concentrated effort he wiggled closer to Fast until their snouts touched, "There, how's that?" He shared her breath and could feel her warmth. It was good enough.
Night returned several hours later and stayed. She left only long enough to get food or water or take care of her other needs. She was their nurse and played the part diligently. They became cocooned in the room, hiding as time drifted by in the outside world. Their seclusion was interrupted one day when a wide-eyed mare shoved open the door, "The castle! The guards have been dispatched, the princesses taken! It's the end of Equestria!" The door slammed after her and her clopping steps retreated down the hall, likely to share the news onwards.
Night fidgeted in place before nudging Silver, "How confident are you in all this? Will it really work out?"
Silver smiled a moment before he replied, "Eighty percent chance."
Night seemed to relax, "Those are good odds... I still wish there was something I could be doing though. Not that I mind watching you two, but..."
Silver shook his head, "It's up to Twilight." He nudged his dangling lavender sphere, drawing comfort from the idea that some small part of Twilight was there with them in the room. "I should have made it a point to meet her again."
Night perked an ear at Silver, "I doubt she had that much time for foalsitting, but you could meet her now, after this is over?"
Silver sifted through his memories, "She did, for a while. That would have been fun, if I'd shown up in time for Twilight Time."
Night looked perplexed. She adjusted her glasses nervously, "So, what do you know about... after all this?"
Silver shook his head, "Nothing. Twilight gets a big ugly tower over the smoldering remains of her library, and that's the last episode I saw. I'll be flying blind, like everypony else."
Night frowned, "That can't make her happy. I never met her myself, but even I know she adores her books. So how long until that?"
Silver shrugged gently, "Dunno... Time scale is fuzzy at best. When I watched it, it all seemed instant, one event after the other, but there could be days or weeks between each thing.
They went quiet until Night went to slip out, "Be right back." She returned in record time, breathing heavily.
Fast perked an ear, "Huh?"
"Everypony!" exclaimed Night, "They're all drained."
Fast blinked slowly, "Everypony? What kind of monster is this? The academy has crazy good enhancers."
Silver shrugged softly, "More magic for him to devour." Silver looked towards the door, "Wonder why he didn't come in here?"
Night shook her head quickly, "Don't even say that! He might come back and get me." She folded her wings around herself as she flopped down. "This isn't right at all."
It wasn't until all their throats were parched and raspy that Night built up the courage to step out. She peered cautiously both ways in the hallway before she pulled the door shut. Her steps quickly retreated in a hurried gallop. She returned minutes later with a large pitcher of water and a tray of food balanced carefully on her wings. She set it all down on a dresser before moving back to the bed, "Enjoy it while it's here. With nopony preparing anything, things are going to start going bad after a while."
Silver frowned softly, "We should... help the others? They're just laying around, not being fed or watered." Silver slipped from the bed in a tumble of limbs before he fought his way to his hooves, "I'm weak but not drained like Fast. I can help. We can't, shouldn't, just hide in here."
Fast gave a thin smile, "Go get 'em. Just don't forget about me."
Silver smiled gently back at Fast, "I won't." He looked to Night, "You with me?"
Night bobbed her head, "I don't... think he'll come back. You're right, we should make sure the others aren't slowly dying out there."
Silver wobbled to the door. Night had it open with a twist of a wing and they were out into the hallway. Ponies were scattered around, grey and listless. Silver approached the first one, a young looking stallion, and rolled him over with some effort. "Hey, you OK?"
The stallion shook his head slowly. Silver nodded in return, "We have water. Drink." This was how the rest of the day went. Slowly they went through the academy, getting water into each pony they found. After they were hydrated, they started gathering them together, placing them side-by-side in the cafeteria. Silver ambled along slowly, feeling like he was being crushed under the weight of the pony he carried, but who else would do it? Well, there was Night. Undrained, she worked fast and diligently. Soon they had the entire population of the school in one miserable place. Night arrived with Fast on her back, setting her with the others, "Last one."
Silver nodded, looking thoughtful as he looked up and down the cafeteria, "There's room for more. We should check the city?"
Night shuddered and shook her head, "No! He's... probably still out there. Besides, if he sucks me dry, I won't be much help." She waved her wings lightly, "I'll take care of everypony here, but I'm not going outside. No way."
Silver turned to the exit, "I don't have much he could take. I'll go."
Silver walked, lacking the energy for a proper trot. He descended the stairs of the academy and gaped. Ponies littered the streets lifelessly in unorganized clumps. With a soft grunt, he fetched as large a mug as he could hold confidently with water, and began making the rounds. There was no way he could get these all back to the cafeteria, but he could water the city, as it were. It was long and difficult work. Silver's bones ached in a way he had forgotten since he used to be older, with some new pains thrown in to keep him on his toes, if he had toes.
If he didn't keep going, who would? He thrust the pain aside, accepting it as a price of living, and continued his meandering route through the city, bringing water and life to the ponies he found, at least until a loud thud stopped him. "Look, you missed one," came Discord's voice as a familiar lion's paw pointed at him. His eyes met Discord's a moment, pleading silently, though that proved to work about as well as it ever did as Tirek stepped into view.
Tirek moved forward, approaching Silver as he fell over himself trying to scramble away. "Easily fixed," said Tirek, grabbing the weakened Silver by the scruff of the neck and hefting him up. Silver felt a powerful suction that ran through his body, but Luna had left him with almost nothing. Tirek frowned, "This one had nothing." He tossed Silver aside and marched on, forgetting he was even there.
Silver crashed into the cobblestone and pain exploded through him. His weakened bones wailed in torment at the treatment and he could do little but cry quietly for a time. The pain faded to an angry but constant rumble, and he slowly fought his way to his hooves. He wanted to go back, find Night, hide with her and wait for it to all go past, but he could still see ponies laying in the street. He couldn't live with himself just ignoring them.
He recovered the mug he had dropped and filled it with water before approaching the next pony, wobbling dangerously with each step. The pony lapped gently at the water a moment before Silver moved on. There were so many of them...
Day turned to evening, then to night. With nopony around, the lights were dark. Silver tried to find more ponies, but fatigue, pain, and lack of vision conspired against him. He finally gave up and turned to head home, but he didn't know where home was. Overcome with fatigue, he sank to the ground and drank the rest of his water. Flopping over slowly onto the road, he closed his eyes. Tomorrow was another day.
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Silver is hoof-bumping himself?
The use of the phrase "good enough" twice in a row is a little awkward. Maybe change what he says to "There, how's that?"
The use of "world" twice is also a bit unwieldy. I'd change that to "...hiding as time drifted by in the outside world."
She means "everypony."
I'd say that Night "built up" the courage.
There's some poetry to the term "lifeless," but that honestly makes it sound like they're dead. Maybe change it to "listless" instead?
There needs to be a space between "ponies," and "but."
5744922 Fixed! The storm has struck, he has arrived! What think thee?
Luna >"David the human must come back". so they will transform him back to normal?
5745022 Possibly, though surviving would be a good first step. Any thoughts on this chapter?
5744995 In terms of pacing, this chapter does just about everything right. I was worried that we were going to get caught up in another game of Humanway, which would have felt like killing time until the next major development, which was Tirek's arrival. The only upside to that would have been to bring Lyra into the situation of Silver trying to deal with life post-Celine (and, for that matter, not mentioning Lyra here, since Silver and Night are tending to everypony in the academy), but that's a minor issue, since their dynamic can be brought up later.
Tirek himself was dealt with in what I consider to be the best way possible for this story: by focusing on the effects of his rampage, rather than putting Tirek himself front-and-center. To somepony like Silver, even before Luna drained him, Tirek is less of a creature than he is a force of nature, so having the chapter revolve around the aftermath of his gluttony for magic was the right way to go.
That Silver went out and tended to everypony that he could was an interesting turn, and one that I suspect will win him considerable goodwill in the future, particularly among the ponies at the academy. While I doubt he'll receive hero-level acclaim for what he did, I'd be surprised if his actions were soon forgotten. That might come into play more heavily than he thinks later on down the road, if the Canterlot nobility give him trouble again in the future. Between any fame this earns him, and his developing relationships with Fast and Night, Silver's heartache over Celine may clear a path to a surprisingly-stable future.
As it was, the interplay between the three of them here was very understated, to the point where I'm not sure if it was cleverly subtle or unsatisfyingly subdued. I'm leaning towards the former, though. They're clearly in a situation where they're all relying on each other for some form of support. Silver and Fast need Night to see to their physical needs. Night (and perhaps Fast too) need Silver to assure them that it will be all right in the end. Silver (and perhaps Night) needs Fast to retain her innate good humor and keep everypony's spirits up (her joke about getting him under the sheets was a perfect example of that). It's heartwarming to see how they're all quietly, and probably subconsciously, forming their own family together. Though it's somewhat ironic that Lyra is being left out.
Given this, it seems like the next step is for things to finally blow over, and everypony will see where they stand now. Things aren't going to be like they were, for many reasons...so what happens after this will be the next big revelation.
5745046 I considered it, the Humanway thing, but it ultimately just felt unimportant. They played, it was fun, and that's about all anyone needs to know about the event. It has no huge impact on the narrative nor really explores aspects of the characters, so I brushed right on past it to the 'main course' as it were.
Having Tirek show up, even briefly, was a bit of a risk, but I felt having him 'blow over' the scene, like the natural disaster you mentioned, felt right. He didn't even notice Silver, nor should he have. Just another pony.
Silver setting out into the city also felt right. He was the one that could do it, and no one else was volunteering, so off he went. He wasn't afraid of Tirek, physically, seeing as Tirek didn't really get physically violent until the Twilight confrontation, though he wasn't entirely sure if he couldn't be drained more. It seemed to work, and he was able to parch a lot of throats in the city before the sun went down and he took a nap.
It looked so fast in the show...
There's one instance where you have Night go out but it's Fast that says that they're all drained. You might want to go over that scene again.
Also, I'm going to be making a Displaced story. It might delay the next chapter of Duellum
5745351 Okay, this is the error in question:
Fast is asking and answering the question here. Obviously, that should be Night in that last line.
5745355 Fixed!
5745351
5745355
5745361
lol even the one that does most of the after-editor editing missed it!
5745374 I never claimed to be infallible.
I think this is one of the darkest moments in silvers life.
Period after a question mark
I think you may be overplaying the severity of the drain. While they do show ponies on the ground when the magic comes back, the Mane 6 were able to run to the Tree of Harmony after being drained, so it wasn't complete immobility. I think the other ponies were depressed and hopeless, but could have moved themselves once it became necessary for bodily maintenance (eating, drinking, answering the call of nature).
5771241 Fixed on the road.
Only us Timelords.
i.chzbgr.com/full/5388115200/h2C416163/
My type 56 by the way.
I just thought of something...
Fast's legs are pretty much useless in her normal form, so when she had her magic drained and her will sapped, how did she manage to get back to the room? And you can't say "magic!", so nyah!
7742373 Her back legs were shot. Her front legs were weak but functional. So, drag... drag... drag...
7742536
Oh. I thought it sounded like all four of her legs were in bad shape.
That last sentence made me think of FNaF4
I can imagine Sliver singing this to Discord after Tirek's double-cross, but before Tirek's defeat, and I can picture him doing it with a muted sense of satisfaction.
Or maybe an alternate reality where he sang it here and told Discord that he'd know when it became relevant.
All the English teachers may be drained, but luckily the grammar Nazis are still kicking.