Soarin's Pet Rock

by Beware The Carpenter

4 - For Want of a Uniform

Stoner was so excited! He was waiting in an alleyway a few corners away from Kravennar’s warehouse with Soarin, Bluey, Carriage Crest, a lawyer, a dog, and a couple of the Oatlantis marines that Bluey’s mom had sent with him to Canterlot to keep him out of trouble.

Together, they were first squad. Everyone had balaclavas on to hide their faces, even Stoner whose mask Soarin had made for him earlier that day out of a cup-holder; but Stoner wasn’t sure it would help much. Not many pet rocks were cool enough to get taken on a secret heist, so if someone did see Stoner, there wouldn’t be many suspects.

Ahead of them, there was a squawk, and then the pulse of a stun-spell; and then everything went quiet.

Stoner held his breath and waited for an alarm to go off, nothing happened. A moment later there were soft hoofetps in the alley and then Captain Night Dive poked his head around the corner, nodded to Bluey, and everyone followed him into the next building and up the stairs to where the rest of second squad was waiting, along with a griffon whose legs and beak had been tied up.

A few moments later, someone from third squad also showed up, carrying a griffon that’d been knocked out. “Both sentries are down.” whispered Night Dive to Bluey, “Third squad will block escape, second squad will secure target; you stay here with first squad and guard the prisoners. We’ll call you in when it’s time to meet Kravennar.”

Bluey nodded and second squad rose to leave, Soarin stood up with them, but Bluey put a hoof on his back and pushed him back to the ground. “What do we do?”

Bluey sighed, and then glanced towards the prisoners; the unconscious one was starting to come too, “Keep an eye on those guys; keep them quiet. They should have at least two people watching them at all times.”

“OK.”

“Stoner doesn’t count.”

Now that hurt.

Soarin picked up Stoner, pointed him towards the prisoners, and then sat down next to Carriage Crest who was standing over both prisoners with his horn lowered.

“Soarin?”

Soarin looked over to Stoner, “Yeah?”

“What did Bluey mean by, ‘I don’t count’? I’m a person aren’t I?”

“Of course you are; you’re my little bro.”

“I mean, I’ve always watched out for you haven’t I? I’m a good watcher, so why does Bluey say I don’t count? Doesn’t he like me anymore?”

“I don’t know… I’ll ask him.”

Soarin turned around, but Bluey was looking over the railing with a telescope... he looked busy, there had to be someone else that Soarin could ask. “Hey Carriage Crest?”

Carriage Crest got an annoyed look, stepped to the side of the prisoners and glanced at them, “Yea?”

“Why doesn’t Stoner count as a person for watching the prisoners?”

Carriage Crest raised an eyebrow, “You’re kidding, right?” Both Stoner and Soarin looked at him and Carriage Crest sighed, “Look, Stoner is a great watcher, but we need to do more than just ‘watch’ the prisoners; we need to be able to stop them if they untie themselves, or get help, and Stoner can’t do that. All he could do is watch them get away.” Stoner smiled, that made a lot of sense.

Both of griffons gave them a really weird look.

---

Eighty-one, eighty-two, eighty-three, eighty-four! Soarin put down the griffon he was holding, which tried to scramble away, but Soarin flipped him over, pinned it down and started counting the feathers on the other wing. Carriage Crest had told him how it was important to count the feathers on a griffon’s wings because if they had seven more feathers on their left then on their right, it meant that they might be sorcerers, waiting for the chance to use their to strike.

Soarin and Stoner had gotten to work counting right away, but Carriage Crest didn’t help. He said someone needed to be there to help Soarin if the griffon did cast a spell on him, and since Stoner wouldn’t be able to repel dark magic, it needed to be him.

Suddenly the warehouse beneath them woke up with a bunch of sounds. Stoner heard shelves get toppled over, griffon shrieks, pulses of stun spells and the popping of griffon pistols. Everyone crouched down, one of the prisoners started struggling and almost got his talons free before Carriage Crest kicked him in the ribs; and then everything went quiet again.

Bluey and Soarin waited and then Night Dive flew out a broken window and landed next to Bluey, a few scratches on his armor and a cold smile on his face, “Warehouse secure, come inside and meet your prisoner.”

---

Inside, the warehouse was cold, dark and messy. Loose feathers scattered the floor among various debris and a few drops of fresh blood. Between two of the shelves that hadn’t collapsed were about ten griffons that were tied up, unconscious, in a net. In the next row over was a little hospital where two of Bluey’s soldiers and three griffons who’d been wounded were being taken care of another one of Bluey’s guys.

In the middle of the room was a huge griffon, tied to a chair under a light looking very unhappy, Bluey took off his balaclava and faced him, looking smug, “Where are the uniforms?”

Kravennar just hissed at him, Bluey shrugged then turned around and gave a small whistle; “Belter.” The dog that had been following them ran forwards, looked at Bluey for a moment and then started sniffing Soarin up and down, tickling his belly and then ran into the main office, tail wagging behind him. Soarin and Bluey followed Belter in and found him trying to stick his nose behind a bookshelf. Bluey used his magic to pull the bookshelf away from the wall, revealing a closed safe which Belter began pawing at.

“Well that’s interesting,” Bluey mused, “Belter seems to think something that smells like Soarin is in this safe here… you did remember to clean the uniform Soarin had used, before stashing it in there; didn’t you?” Kravennar gave a punctured growl, and Bluey continued, “We’ve got the equipment to crack a safe, and the time to do it in, this will be a lot easier if you just tell us what to code is.”

Kravennar stared Bluey for a long minute then spat on the ground, “Seven, five, eight, three zero.” Bluey smiled and stepped aside as Carriage Crest entered the code. There was a soft click, and then the safe door swung open showing a whole pile of stuff, and in the front were Soarin’s uniforms!

“Alright!” Soarin and Stoner shouted in unison.

“They look intact,” said Bluey, passing the pile to Soarin, “But you’d better check them to make sure they weren’t tampered with, just in case.” Soarin started digging through the uniforms. Meanwhile, Stoner kept watching the lawyer Bluey had brought with him who now approached Kravennar.

“Now I’m sure you realize that tampering with the Canterlot Cup would be considered a serious offense if it was to be brought to court. You’d be facing fines of about five million bits, and even if you did manage to avoid the ten to fifteen years jail you’d be likely to serve, the publicity would cost you your franchise here… and at home.”

Bluey put his hoof up and then took over “Now I could leave here with the uniforms, not say anything about this, and then you’d only be facing losses of about three million, and that’s assuming that the Wonderbolts lose… but I’m just not feeling that generous.”

“I will leave Canterlot.” Promised Kravennar, “I will not come back.”

“Good.” Nodded Bluey, “That’s a start, but I’m not quite sure I’m feeling it yet.”

Kravennar sighed, “You already found my safe, anything valuable is in there; my gift to you.”

“That sounds reasonable.” Smiled Bluey, “… I… guess I’ll just leave you here with a few of my guys for the night to make sure you don’t cause any more trouble. We’ll let you go once the show is over.”

Kravennar cursed something Stoner couldn’t make out, and Bluey trotted back into the main office, swept the tables clean of paperwork on them and then filling them with the stuff from the vault. “All my uniforms are OK,” shouted Soarin, after looking over the last one for booby traps, “Nothing wrong with them.”

“Glad to hear it.” Smiled Bluey looking between his friend and his treasure, “You know what… why don’t you take something, first pick of the haul.”

Soarin and Stoner’s eyes widened, “Really?”

“Sure; wouldn’t have any of this if it wasn’t for you.”

Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy, oh boy! Soarin grabbed Stoner and together the two of them began shuffling through all the stuff that was there. “Careful!” Bluey called, steadying a funky doodad Soarin had nearly knocked over, but Soarin wasn’t listening. It was like Hearths Warming Morning; only you got to choose what you got.

There were gismos and gadgets and a painting of a griffoness wearing lots of jewels; a locked chest Soarin couldn’t be bothered looking for the key of, a pistol with a shiny platinum barrel and quartz grip and… pretty.

Soarin picked up the amulet and showed it to Bluey, “Can I take this?”

Bluey shrugged, “Sure, why not.”

Behind Bluey, Stoner saw Kravennar’s eyes widen some, convincing him that Soarin must have gotten something really cool. Soarin lifted the chain around his neck, which then seemed to clasp by itself, and then red-hot pain went searing through Stoner’s spine, his hoof went numb, and felt as though his green mossy mane had just withered and died.

“…Whoa.” Stammered Soain. “…I feel great!”

Comments

[the other sans]

Behind Bluey, Stoner saw Kravennar’s eyes widen some, convincing him that Soarin must have gotten something really cool. Soarin lifted the chain around his neck, which then seemed to clasp by itself, and then red-hot pain went searing through Stoner’s spine, his hoof went numb, and felt as though his green mossy mane had just withered and died.

Woah there, what? When did Stoner evolve?