4: Four
Finally, nearly an hour later, Coco was on her way back to the Boutique, her mission accomplished and then some.
Beside her was a catering wagon, towed by a poofy-haired pink pony that Coco had recognized as another one of Rarity's friends. Atop the wagon were two large tins holding deluxe salad dinners, two vials of salad dressing, and one more extra-large tin the pink pony had brought out from Sugarcube Corner.
"Thank you so much for your help, Pinkie Pie," Coco said. "I'm sure Rarity is going to love this."
"No problem! Thank you so much for bringing Rarity back from Crazytown!" Pinkie singsonged. "I've been there. Nice place to visit, buuuuuuuuuut..."
Coco chuckled. "Point taken." She pointed to the largest tin. "So what's in this, anyway?"
Pinkie beamed with pride, and took off the lid by its handles. Beneath was a towering, majestic, brown cake.
"This is Rarity's favorite dessert: triple-mousse-whipped double-chocolate single-serve ice cream cake! The way you can tell it's her favorite is that it's the cake she always says she can 'neeeeeever eat' when you put it in front of her, yet always accepts anyway, saying she'll put it in the cooler for Sweetie Belle, and then completely devours when she thinks nopony's looking!" She replaced the lid. "I always keep one around for emergencies like this."
Coco held back her mouth's watering. They were nearly back at the Boutique, after all, and it wouldn't do to have Rarity see her a drooling mess.
When they arrived, Coco knocked. Rarity answered the door, and her mane, coat and tail were no longer rumpled. She was back to her normal style.
"Welcome back, Coco," Rarity said, all easy confidence again. "And Pinkie! Good to see you too, dear." She looked at the catering wagon. "Oh, my. This looks professional. And expensive. Coco, please tell me you didn't break your budget on my account."
"I'd have been okay with doing so," Coco said, "but everypony told me not to pay."
"They told you what?" Rarity blinked, then looked to Pinkie, who was unhooking herself from the wagon. "Pinkie, explain please?"
Pinkie bounced. "When Coco and I told everyone how super duper down in the dumps you'd been all week, everypony at Sugarcube and Cloverleaf went straight to work!"
"But why?" Rarity asked. "I-I mean, I'm grateful, but this all seems so out of the blue."
"Du-uuu-uh!" Pinkie said. "Because you're good for our businesses! Rarity, ponies from all over Equestria come here just to get styled by you! And once you're done, salads are, like, the only thing they feel comfortable eating without messing up what you've done for them. Then they have dessert at Sugarcube Corner! Usually something small. With small bites."
Pinkie stepped closer to Rarity and placed a hoof on her shoulder.
"Rarity," Pinkie said, softly, "I know it's easy to forget when you're working, but this town loves you. That includes us chefaroonies. You don't let us down, and we won't let you down. 'Kay?"
Coco watched Rarity blush.
"Flattery will get you everywhere, Ponyville," the unicorn replied. "Very well—I'll do all I can to stay in the game. One last question, though: why is the Sugarcube Corner tin so large?"
"Oh, come on, Rarity," Pinkie said, lifting the tin just an inch. "You know what this is... "
Rarity's reaction upon seeing even the barest hint of the cake was immediate and obvious. Her lips quivered and shone with drool, prompting Coco to wonder why she had even bothered with restraint herself.
"H-haaah... w-well, I-I suppose I do," Rarity uttered. "A-and honestly, I have no idea why you keep bringing these over. All I do is give these cakes to Sweetie Belle and her friends. Into the cooler it goes, I suppose—"
"But didn't you tell me last week that the Cutie Mark Crusaders left for filly camp for an entire month?" Pinkie said, mock-dramatically. "This cake totally won't keep that long! I'll just take it back—"
Rarity's hoof darted onto the tin, hitting it with a clang. She fixed Pinkie with a manic glare.
"I. Said. I'll. Take. It," Rarity uttered through clenched teeth.
"If you insist!" Pinkie backed away from the wagon, winking at Coco as she passed by. "I gotta go. The Cake twins need a bath, and that's always an adventure."
"Do join Coco and me at the spa tomorrow?" Rarity asked, stroking the cake tin like nothing had happened. "It sounds like all of us could use a refresher."
"Sure thing!" Pinkie replied. "I'll see you then. G'night!"
Coco waved at a departing Pinkie, then turned to Rarity. "Spa?"
Rarity scoffed. "Oh, dear, I've gone and spoiled the surprise. Yes, Ponyville has its own world-class, luxury spa. It's where I go to melt my cares away on a weekly basis. Hot tubs, mud masks, and oh! You have not lived until Aloe and Lotus have put their hooves on you! A grander massage you will never receive."
Coco gasped happily as she pushed the cart inside the boutique. "Oh, that sounds fantastic! I can't wait." Once inside, she raised one of the salad tin's lids. "I'll start putting dinner together."
The lid snapped shut, and all three tins shimmered with a magical aura.
"You'll do no such thing," Rarity lectured. "Coco, you've already done so much, and I will no longer stand and simply watch. What you will do now is sit on my couch until I call you into my kitchen."
"But-"
"Ah, ah, ah! Out here. It won't be long, I promise. Relax, for Celestia's sake."
Using her magic, Rarity wheeled the cart through the kitchen door, humming to herself. Soon, Coco was alone in the main boutique hall.
Looking around, she could see things were a lot cleaner now. Fabric and garments were neatly hung on racks, the books and magazines were nearly stacked in a corner, and Rarity had even cleaned the mirrors.
Coco went to Rarity's work desk, which she could see was also a lot more organized too. The book of clippings was still there, but now closed.
Perched atop the book, Coco spotted a familiar, multicolored, spool of thread.
"Coco?" Rarity's voice sounded from the kitchen door. "Dinner... is served."
Coco left the table and walked to the door. Rarity took Coco's hoof and opened the door, gesturing for Coco to pass.
When Coco stepped through, a candlelit dining room greeted her on the other side.
Salad dinner and dessert cake lay on the table, prepared and scrumptious-looking. Every so often tiny lights would twinkle over the table itself—more of Rarity's magic, Coco guessed.
Not only could Rarity improvise when needed, but she really had a talent for true beauty. "Rarity..." a stunned Coco eventually managed.
A gentle hoof to Coco's mouth was Rarity's reply. She walked behind Coco, draping a green shawl over her made of the lightest and smoothest fabric Coco had ever felt.
"I don't live in Manehattan," Rarity said, her voice low, "but the impression I always got is that it's not a place where one is able to enjoy luxury without paying exorbitant prices. Now, I most certainly did not show you a welcome befitting a lady earlier. Therefore, the least I can do, in apology and gratitude, is to make the rest of your stay in Ponyville as lovely as possible... and start by providing the atmosphere you do deserve tonight."
Coco's heart swelled. "Thank you," she said, soft as a whisper. "I love it all."
"I'm glad," Rarity said, her tone showing that she meant it. She started walking to her side of the dining table, when Coco held up her hoof.
"Rarity?"
Rarity turned to look back. "Yes, Coco?"
Coco expected the words to be harder to form, but in the end she barely had to think as they rolled off her tongue.
"I never asked for your generosity. But you still showed it to me, and showed me what it meant. Not a day goes by when I don't thank Celestia for that. That's why I was here for you today... and why I'll continue to be. If you want me."
Rarity turned around completely around, walked back to Coco, and stepped in close. Very close.
One more time, there was that smile. That smile that spoke volumes. That smile that leaned in closer still.
Lips brushed against Coco's cheek—and as warm shivers rippled through her, she heard a whisper in her ear:
"I do."
(*closes eyes, shuts mic off, exhales*)
(*gently places mic on ground*)
(*exits stage left, hands in pockets*)
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5794317
Seconded.
Having actually finished it now:
Recently, I delved into the realm of writing romance, and it is not easy. This is not romance, but it's the kind of thing that nevertheless convinced me to try it. Lulamoon's Castle started it, sure, but Rainbow Reflections is what convinced me, "Yes, I think I can do this," and while the result is certainly not the most widely read bit of fiction I've put out to the world, it was certainly the one that I enjoyed writing the most.
Thank you, Bookish Delight, for you are, at this moment in life, my Rarity: Through your own expressions of art in making ponies beautiful, you inspire me to do the same.
Your fics always feel like an episode. Literally. I mind-saw this fic in Flash animation instead of my mind's weird anime-esque art style. (Your Coco is a precious beautiful cinnamon roll too good for this sinful earth.) ILU forever, Booky.
P.S. The fic at the top of the Similar list is also a Slice-o-Life RariCo...featuring padded ponies. This amuses me.
Well, you beat me to the punch on this (I was always curious whose Coco/Rarity story would come out first, since we were both doing one).
The story was basically flawless, and I echo Starlight Shadow when she mentioned it being so similar to an episode. I could easily believe Coco reappearing to help Rarity through a roadblock in her career like this.
What I found interesting about the story, is that as good as it was, I would have been fine if it ended after the second chapter. Once I finished that chapter, it did feel like a logical end, but I was more than overjoyed when it continued. The conversation between Spike and Coco might have been one of my favorite moments I've ever had in any story I've read by you (and maybe every single story I've read that Spike is in). The idea that they would understand being the voice of reason with their friends was really well done and I can see the two of them being good friends just due to their own experiences.
I also saw a ton of similarities in the beginning of your story than the beginning of my still unpublished one (which I haven't bothered to touch in awhile, though because of this I might go back to it now). Coco getting a letter to come to Ponyville and marveling at the differences of the small town, vs Rarity getting a letter to come to Manehattan and commenting on the atmosphere of the city. Just found it kinda interesting.
But seriously, queen of friendshipping, you couldn't have made them closer without being a couple. And you did it twice!!
So much teasing...
This was awesome though! Fantastic work.
DJRD
5794484 I couldn't agree more.
Bookish this story is a true masterpiece. The pacing was perfect and the characters felt so right, so natural, so fluent, so 'believable'.
Cocos talk with Rarity had me practically glued to the screen. I was so entranced that I literally forgot everything else for a few moments.
It's these precious little moments that make a story a true gem, that make it magical. But it is not what let it stay that way. What makes this story so wonderful is that that 'spell' never broke until it was finished. You managed to keep me spellbound.
In that regard, It's interesting that you ended the story were you did. Usually after finishing a story I have either a feeling regret that it is over or a longing for more if I don't feel like my expectations had been met. Your story had neither. It ended, it just did and that was it. Like Starlight Shadow said, like an episode. And I'm neither sad about it nor do I absolutely need to read more. Sure I'd love to but this 'Slice' of life is finished and doing more would likely have a negative impact on the magic the rest already had.
Another little thing I loved in this story was how mature Spike had been. He absolutely nailed it. The main six are strong and wonderful personalities but they are themselves their greatest enemies. What's wonderful about him saying that is, that it actually makes sense. Even in the series he has always been the voice of reason and has always been the one to take a step back and sort things out. It makes sense for him partially maybe because he has to deal more with himself, being a dragon and having to watch greed.
Oh! a last little thing on that account. Him to value Rarity's inner beauty above all else is a wonderful parable to his dragon nature. He knows that he has to give, has to be generous to preserve her as much as he realised her inner beauty, her personality to be the most precious thing in the world for him in the first place. It's a wonderful irony that the greatest jewel in this dragons hoard is one that he has to give himself to constantly.
Thank you for gifting us with this masterpiece Bookish
Excellent story. When I saw it in my feed, I knew I had to read it right away. And I was not disappointed.
Coco is a rock here. She's supportive, and she excels at it, much like Spike does. I'm reminded of the speech from Buffy The Vampire Slayer, when Xander talks about how he and people like him - not big superheroes or such, but ordinary people - can be heroes in their own right just by being there for their friends when they're needed. And it's pretty much what Spike says here, too. There's a lot of worth in being someone else's foundation - the Alfred to Batman, the KRC to Fourze, the Spike to Twilight, etc. And Coco does it so well. (Then again, I wrote her in that role too, though for a different unicorn.)
While this story is primarily Coco's, Rarity plays her part very well too. The dreamer who's crushed by the cruel reality of the real world. Needing the support of her rock. Impressively, you managed to capture her at her worst without letting her look bad. I absolutely loved her here. And the other characters - Twilight, Spike, Pinkie and Applejack - while only playing minor roles, did them well. Spike's speech, if a little sudden to present to a very fresh acquaintance, was very strong. And Twilight is taking a page from Pinkie, hamming things up without a care. (That was incredibly fun.)
While shorter than Lulamoon's Castle (what with no flashbacks), it maintained a very similar style, as well as the same kind of natural flow that kept me reading until the end. (As well as ending on the same kind of maybe-kinda-sorta-possibly romantic note, without tipping your hand either way. Oh, you.
) Excellent work.
5794412
Oh, sure, she's sane now, but you should have seen the deleted scene where I had Coco instantly run over and take a bite out of that marshmallow.
No food service on Equestrian train rides!
Brilliant. So much to enjoy about this story, including a properly-characterized Pinkie Pie (so many writers get her wrong), and a slap in the face to all of the whiners who feel like Spike is abused and/or neglected. 'Scuse me while I add this to some groups...
5794458
augh flattery
Romance is hard. You practically have to have a blueprint of every single facet of your characters laid out in your mind, and even then whoever you show it to will have a different blueprint. Cue squabbles. Yet (at least in my eyes) it is by far the most fun of genres to work in, and it can complement any other you wish.
That you took the first step (and such a meaty one at that -- 13K is nothing to sneeze at) is to be commended). Try again sometime while taking note of what you learned and what you liked. Throw out the rest, and you'll find you're able to make hearts sing.
Thank you for the kind words.
It shows up while I'm outside being productive in the garden. I see how you are!
5794484
<3u too, hon. (*hug*)
Thank you. It really is wonderful people like you (and the rest of my "clientele") that keep me here and just sane enough to keep doing this. I should have been long gone by now. And I take extra pride in knowing I breached your shoujo-anime mind-barrier.
As for that Similar story... I got nothin'. I'm just gonna let fimfic do its thing; I've long since stopped trying to figure it out.
5794656
Luckily, we have archival footage of your test audience before you deleted it:
bit.ly/1By7Wb7
5794594
Yeeeeeeeeah, I didn't have the heart to tell you after your first comment that you hadn't made it to Chapter Four yet.
And wow, you're totally right now that I think of it. There are similarities between your Rarico setup and mine. Granted, said setup is just one of the easiest ways to get them into a room together, but still.
The end of the story was going to be after the second chapter, with the rest of it as an epilogue. I had a lot to say but wasn't sure how to make it fit. Fortunately(?), it seems if you feed my editor mashmallow coco she goes into overdrive, and here we are.
Finally, I'm with you. Removed from the (ahem) more zealotous sects of his fanbase (and consequential hatebase), I love Spike to little bits. And I hate feeling so alone in my viewpoint on what purpose he serves as a character and a person. Nothing I can do but strike my own path, I guess.
Thanks, and glad you liked it.
5794675
Thanks!
To be fair, I have a couple of Pinkie advisors (and a couple of Applejack advisors). It's because of them that I'm feeling infinitely more confident in writing Pinkie than I used to be even a year ago. She's really fun if you throw yourself completely into it.
5794748
well what do you expect, trying to have a life instead of constantly refreshing fimfic
of course you're gonna miss stuff
it's okay i forgive you
5794621
The finest of gems will lose their luster if overstressed or neglected.
Thank you for your feedback -- I'll have to take notes regarding whatever it was about my style this time around that left readers enraptured. For example, an earlier draft of this a lot more spaced out in terms of pacing, but got trimmed down a lot in the editing process.
While I wouldn't quite say that Spike has always been the voice of reason, his track record's pretty good, and if there's one thing that Season 4 and comics like the Nightmarity arc have taught us, it's that Spike is repeatedly willing to look outside of his own desires for the sake of Rarity's well-being simply as a best friend. (Of course, we already knew this vis-a-vis him and Twilight from show start, but there've been so many episodes and comics now, it's easy to forget.)
That's the Spike I like. The one free of baggage.
5794628
Thank you so much, Moon. I'm actually a bit relieved I'm back to meeting your standards.
Your Coco certainly advised mine subconsciously. I was rather shocked at how savvy yet humble she was in the face of a tornado like Trixie, and thus combined that ideal of her with the one I already had. I think it works.
You're absolutely right that I like writing Spike as a snarky, hilarious Alfred, though all the same, bless you for namedropping the KRC; their growth as support in the movies was nothing short of magical. (Oddly enough, I never actually got around to watching Buffy, though it wouldn't be hard to get my hands on it; would you say it holds up in 2015?)
Anyway, in the end, yes--you're going to see this style out of me a lot. It's... pretty much the only style I have.
And while I'll season it ever so often, I've learned that trying to change it leads to lots of toppled ponniquins. So for better or worse, here we are. Naturally I am glad that you are here and that you enjoy the show. :)
This was beautiful. I loved every second of it :D And all I could think about was this song :V It just screams this whole situation. Excuse me while I go re-evaluate my appreciation for Coco.
5795437
Looked up the lyrics. You're right, that song does work.
Love the story, though the ending confuses me slightly. Are they in a Romantic relationship that Spike actually sanctioned because me very confused by that. In essence I think the shipping was implied too much, though I do like how it ended from a stylistic POV.
A good story, the little bit of shipping at the end is kind of out of place though. Better if they were just friends. Because friends are supposed to be there for you when your down. To understand a problem when it rises. Coco was that for Rarity.
Aaaaaaaah, so cuuuuuuuuuuute!
And that ending! Rarity always did know how to make a pony feel special.
5796182
5796179
(*looks around for the Romance tag*)
(*looks in the closet*)
(*looks under the bed*)
(*checks the fridge just to be sure; it sometimes hides there as a last resort*)
...yeah, sorry, doesn't seem to be around. 'fraid I can't help y'all on that one.
Thank you for the kind words all the same!
5796203 I know. It's why I was confused as you put a SoL tag but the end implies romance a bit anyway.
5795378 It was, admittedly, years since I last saw the series, so I can't really give an unbiased opinion untainted by nostalgia goggles. It was good, but I don't want to compare to today's fare. That said, anyone who can watch Kamen Rider without rolling their eyes would probably weather it just fine. It's not perfect, but pretty fun nonetheless.
5796321
Because two lady friends obviously can't be close and mildly affectionate (like Rarity often is in the show) without wanting to jump each other's bones.
Besides, even if it is romance, it's hardly a major component of the story.
This is a lovely idea! When I'm done with my current series. I'm gonna read this one. Excellent job on maintaining the canon image.
Huzzah! The fluff of ages has come to fruition!
5797674
Not a single goddamn soul in Manehattan recognized (or cared) about Princess Twilight.
And really, that's how it should have been.
5798404
Still disagree. Green Is Not Your Color was ages ago, even by show chronology, the Ponytones are local, the magazine publishing industry is practically run by freelancers, and having the author recognize a flash-in-the-pan like Fluttershy would have done zero for the article (it would not have changed the criticism; in fact in the most extreme of cases it might have called said criticism into question), the story, or anyone but... Fluttershy fans, really.
5798456 Photo Finish is apparently the biggest fashion photographer in Equestria and she hoof picked Shy as the next big thing. She'd be constantly thought of in a "Whatever happened to her?" sort of way
5798471
That's your headcanon and you are welcome to it. I have mine (which is, actually, no headcanon at all. I do my best to stay flexible).
Even if your hypothesis were canonically the case, bringing it up there would not have constructively added to the article, and worst case have bogged it down with extra unrelated baggage. Even if it had occurred to me during writing? It would have gotten cut in editing or even before it.
Like, I thought about adding it just now as a parenthetical aside, weighed the pros and cons, and in the end, I'm still against it.
5796705
Yeah I am really just idiot and I so totally do not get that two lady friends can't be affectionate.
I got what the author is going for no mistake, just took me by surprise due to the atmosphere/timing of it. Nuzzling I get. It's affectionate in horses. Kissing in that context with that lead up made me blink.
Nothing more I can say about this fix except... Brilliant. Absolutely 100% brilliant.
Hmmm.... how should I put this....
Here's my feelings about this fic:
media3.giphy.com/media/10jRHyuxV1FsvC/200_s.gif
LIke and favorite are earned for the piece as a whole! It flows well with few hiccups.
Hmmm... you have several fics that I have liked or liked&fav'd...
Your writing is interesting and highly entertaining. I will attempt to read all your other tales and have this site inform me of new ones.
Welp, I have now decided to stalk you!
...
JUST when I think that there could not possibly be any more maximum-tier Romance fics on this site, THIS glorious gem pops out! What the hay! You authors will be the death of me! It's already the middle of the night, let me goooo!
(Perfect. Just perfect. Do. Not. Change. A. Thing.)
"I don't write shipping, I don't get shipping."
That nose give you trouble with doors, Pinnochio?
5800506
It's surprisingly utilitarian, actually! I'm practically opening the things via remote control over here!
(Also I never said I didn't get shipping. I said I'd burnt out on it from doing it too much. When I remove all the limiters and do an actual shipfic, oh you will know)
Woopwoopwoopwoopwoopwoopwoopwoopwoopwoopwoopwoopwoopwoopwoopwoopwoop
It'ssogood. Sogoooooood.
Dangit! I forgot to favorite this!
Fix'd now....
This story was so sweet, I do not doubt it was more fattening than that cake.
Excellent work, really, everything was stupendously well done.
That was really well written. I enjoyed reading it. Keep up the great work!
>Bookish Delight
>Not a shipfic
>consider me surprised.
... Wait, what? It's over already? Huh... I didn't notice. These shipping goggles must be driving me blind. I'm still putting this into my Romance bookshelf, though, 'cause there's simply no reason not to!
5797194
Speaking as sometime who technically works in two entertainment industries at once (down from three) and then still comes home to frequent this site for some reason, I can completely verify that none of your analysis is untrue.
I can neither confirm nor deny the Author Tract thing, though.
Oh and hey, congrats on a new Equestrylvania chapter!
5796581
Yep, it's the relationship I enjoy between them. It's easy to write Coco as "submissive" to Marshmallow, for lack of a better term, and you'd have something mildly believable. But step back and look at the big picture, and you realize Coco actually can easily be an equal terms friend, and has tons to offer Marshmallow's livelihood.
All Marshmallow has to do is listen to her heart and dive in.
This won't be the last you see of these two, trust me.
*Takes a deep breath. Exhales. Gives a light smile.*
It's rare to find a story so fulfilling.
First off, I love the premise. Too often we see Rarity driven down paths that she otherwise wouldn't take, only to be ushered back in by some arbitrary means which are then never spoken of again. This time, though? Not only is she down a path that nearly breaks her, but the path itself is believable. It belongs. There's nothing about it that seems tossed about in an idea blender until it can be smothered over the story; rather, it appears to be plucked from a garden and merely displayed. No frills, no bells...just this idea.
Next, I love the execution. Focusing on Coco's perspective gave a fantastic new view into Rarity's trouble. Yes, we've had the rest of the Mane Six do their part to bring Rarity back from the brink, but giving the task to Coco instead was quite possibly the single greatest decision I've seen. Though it's true that she was only made privy to Rarity's plight due to Spike's concern, such a point is carefully set aside until it matters. In the meantime, we get excellent discussion between two characters who are on more level ground than I initially thought. I do not lie when I say this story makes me appreciate Coco as a character, instead of just as plot device.
Finally, I love everything else about this story. Nothing felt rushed or bloated, nothing felt unnecessary or forced, and even the hints at something more between Rarity and Coco were done extremely well. Hell, I had to stop for a moment at two specific points, simply because I was in awe. The first was when Coco remembered the "discussion over coffee," where I made the connection to Suri. The second was Spike's entire attitude, which was done masterfully. You showed him in a mature, competent light - something that doesn't happen enough.
What else is there to say that hasn't been said? There is not a single thing about this fic that I did not like. Premise, pacing, development, interaction, crisis, climax, aftermath, foreshadowing...everything belongs. Everything is in its place. This is a masterpiece, worthy of as much praise as any conductor and his symphony.
I am so very thankful to have seen this today. Reading this story was the highlight of my day, and I'm sure it will be for several more days to come.
Overall score: 10/10
5803353
Them's fightin' words, pardner.
5801941
5801865
5801406
5801213
5801013
5800653
5800019
5799384
5798948
Thanks bunches to all of you. I'm happy that I managed to make you smile.