Balance. It's such a simple thing. But it's always the little things that are the most important.
All across the rampant Multiveres and alternate realities, there is a precariously maintained balance between the forces of Good and Evil, Chaos and Order, Yin and Yang, yada yada blah blah blah. That's not the important part. The important part is us, The G.E.A.
The Genesis Equilibrium Agency (that's us) are the ones charged with making sure that balance actually stays in balance, and never leans to far to one side or the other. We're the things that go bump in the night, so that when you wake up everything's alright. Don't worry if you've never heard of us; if we've done our job right, you won't know we've done anything at all.
But this story isn't really about The G.E.A. either, it's about me. I'm Special Agent Victor Umbra. And this is the story of my time in Equestria.
Now pre-read by the always awesome and ever-amazing Glassed!
WARNING: May contain offensive language. Coverart drawn by me.
(Current tags non-inclusive. Will add more as story progresses.)
Pretty good, but kind of a little bit really a lot copying Omnius' travels. Tracked and liked, good gentlesir.
578317 I thank you most sincerely for your track and like.
I realize that I would definitely seem like a rip of Omnius, but in my defense I did think of this months ago. I'm only just now working on it, and even I have to admit that over-all it's going to end up looking like a mash-up of Omnius' Travels: Equestria and Harpflank and Sweets. Both are great stories though, so I guess that's not entirely a bad thing.
~Signed, InfiniteBrony
Cover picture is pretty frightening. He looks like a disheveled drug dealer.
578343
But I modeled his appearance after me as a pony! 
~Signed, InfiniteBrony
578333 That's okay, it's not bad to write a story a little (or a lot) similar to another story. It's always nice to read something from another person's perspective.
578359 dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/Luna_lolface.png Now that's what we authors like to hear!
~Signed, InfiniteBrony
578357
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578375 ........ It's the toothpick, isn't it?
~Signed, InfiniteBrony
I like where this is going.
Dear Readers,
I apologize. I know that this chapter is later then I usually release them and is quite a bit shorter than I tend to make them. But I have a good reason. As of today, Thursday, I had exactly two weeks left of high school. As such, I am rather swapped with real life stuff. Finals, Prom, Graduation, etc. This tends to leave very little time for me to write ponies. I figured that I would at least give you all something, even though it isn't much. Don't worry though, once real daily life settles down a bit, I'll get right back to delivering you your scheduled pony stories.
Stay pony my friends.
~Signed, InfiniteBrony
One chapter and I'm already intrigued? Good bloody job! For some reason I can't help but think of Omnius' Travels: Equestria whenever I read this.
And I can totally imagine Victor already, in a coat and a toothpick.
I'm so gonna read this.
-Glassed
OK, critique so far:
Love the concept. I've seen it before, but I like your approach. Having him wait for permission to fight was pretty interesting, and makes him vulnerable but still gives us an idea of just how strong he is.
I won't go into grammar as you still don't have a proof-reader, so that's fair (though there seems to be a few words missing here and there).
You're very descriptive, which I LOVE when people are. I think that your biggest worry is your pacing.
This is really new to me, but for once the pacing isn't to fast. No, it's the complete opposite. That we have to wait until chapter 4 for the main(?) characters to finally meet, all the while not having much going on, is a bit- No, no I think I know what is it; the chapter length.
chapter 2-4 (and perhaps 5 as well) could easily have been put into a single chapter or two. This would make the reader feel like something is actually going on, and that you're (the reader) not just rushing through chapters.
I think you should go for slightly longer chapters or perhaps find another way to solve the pacing problem.
Though you have a great story-concept going here, and I can't wait to see how you'll do.
-Glassed
715268>>714966
I'm glad you like it, and I'm not at all surprised that it makes you think of Omnius' Travels. It even reminds me of it.
And I totally agree with you about the chapters. If I could go back and merge them I would. But the thing is, I was trying to keep a daily release schedule when I first started writing this story, and so I would write until I got to a reasonable point in which to stop the chapter and then I would post it. I have rectified this however, starting with the chapter I'm writing right now actually. I hope I can get better at the pacing and chapter length, something I've always had trouble with.
I hope that I can continue to write something you can enjoy reading.
~Signed, InfiniteBrony
717729 Well, at this point in the story, you have a good place for change. He's finally in Ponyville, he's met one of the mane six and he's gotten introduced to the reader.
If there had to be a change to the chapters, now is the perfect time to do so.
-Glassed
Dear my readers,
I apologize. This chapter is far too short, and took far too long to get here. I have been rather busy lately, and haven't had many chances to write for your pony pleasure. This fic is not dead, nor will it ever be so. Have some pony for your trouble.
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~Signed, InfiniteBrony
Are you ever going to continue this?