The Hiatus Zone

by SirWritesalot

Not Exactly Canon

Another day passed, and the Mane Seven still felt no closer to the beginning of season 5 and release from the Hiatus Zone. Though she would never admit it, even Pinkie was starting to feel a little down. After all, months of endless boredom could surely wear down anypony. She wondered if Discord had been conscious during his time as a stone statue and almost felt a little sorry for him. But, despite everything, she knew she had to keep her cheery demeanor up if she wanted to prevent her friends from getting too depressed.

“Hey! Do you want to see me do a flip?” Pinkie asked her friends happily.

“Not over the railing, I hope,” Rarity said.

“Well, of course not, silly!” Pinkie said.

“Sure, let’s see it,” Twilight said. So Pinkie jumped as high in the air as she could and did not just one, but three flips on the way down.

“Ta-da!” she said.

“I’ve got to admit, that was pretty impressive for an Earth pony,” Rainbow Dash said. It was impressive, but to tell the truth, Pinkie’s antics were getting a little irritating, not just to Rainbow Dash, but to everypony. Nopony would ever tell her that of course, but seeing the apparently endless cheeriness of somepony else when you weren’t feeling very happy yourself could sometimes get rather grating. It was fun at first, but as morale had continued to dip, it had begun to seem more obnoxious than anything. Once they were out of the Hiatus Zone and back in Equestria, they would surely be in a much better mood and able to more sincerely enjoy Pinkie’s hijinks.

“Hey, look over there!” Applejack said, pointing to a spot a little ways down the railing. An elderly duck and three much younger ducks had just been brought up on a lift, and two members of the TV Police were escorting them into the Hiatus Zone proper. Since there wasn’t much of anything else to do, the Mane Seven decided to go a little closer to see what was going on, but still made sure to stay back far enough that they couldn’t be accused of interfering in any way.

“Thank you,” they heard the elderly duck say in a Scottish accent. He was crying tears of both joy and disbelief, and hugging the nearest member of the TV Police. “Thank you. I never thought I’d see the day…”

“Alright, that’s enough. Let go,” the TV Policeman said gruffly. “Unless you want to go back down there again?”

“No, of course not!” the duck said, letting go immediately.

One of the three younger ducks, who were probably around the age of the Cutie Mark Crusaders, said, “Launchpad’s coming too, right?”

“And Webby?” asked another.

“And everybody else?” asked the third.

“Yes, we’ll be heading back down for them,” one of the TV Police said in exasperation. “But don’t get your hopes too high. This might only be temporary – if the new show turns out to have a separate canon, you’re going right back where you came from.” All four ducks fell silent and simply stared into space after that remark.

“I hope they do get to go back to their world,” Fluttershy said as the Mane Seven walked away from the scene again.

“I agree,” Applejack said. “It’s not every day that you see anypony get out of the Cancellation Zone. It would be a real shame if they had to go back again.”

“Yes, quite,” Rarity said. “Would anypony like to join the Cult of Smooze?”

“Would we like to…what?” Spike asked.

“I…I don’t know what I just – Lord Smooze will return and consume us all someday. Will you be ready?” Rarity said brightly.

“Okay, that’s creeping me out,” said Rainbow Dash.

“What is ‘Smooze’?” Twilight asked, her mind already racing to try to figure out what was going on. Clearly, somepony was making Rarity say these things somehow.

“Convert now and be saved,” Fluttershy said, and then covered her mouth in confusion and fear. After this remark, the rest of the Mane Seven started to unconsciously back away from Rarity and Fluttershy.

“Hey, look over there!” Pinkie said, pointing into a crowd of other TV characters.

“Over where?” asked Rainbow Dash. “No, wait. I think I see what she’s talking about.” Though several nearly identical pointy-haired men in lab coats and boys in yellow shirts were partially blocking the view, it was clear that there was another Mane Seven not very far away. Their Rarity and Fluttershy appeared to be passing out pamphlets to any characters willing to take them, and oddly enough, their Twilight seemed to be human.

“Do you think they have something to do with this?” Applejack asked.

“Possibly,” Twilight said.

“The Cult of Smooze? Anypony? We have pamphlets!” Rarity said. Though they were slightly too far away to hear her clearly, the mouth of the other Rarity seemed to be forming these words at the same time as our Rarity.

“Make that ‘almost certainly,’” Twilight said. The Mane Seven headed over there as quickly as they could, a few of them saying other seemingly nonsensical things as they did.

As soon as they were clearly within view of the other Mane Seven, they received a somewhat unexpected reaction. “Is that them?” both our Pinkie and the other Pinkie said excitedly, and at exactly the same time.

“I think it is!” the other, human Twilight said. In contrast to what was happening with the others, our Twilight found that she wasn’t forced to say this as well.

“We’re, like, your biggest fans!” both Rainbow Dashes said, and the other Mane Seven came over to meet everypony.

“That’s…uh…nice,” our Applejack said. “Who are you, again?”

“And why are you making everypony else say those things?” our Twilight asked, not even trying to veil the suspicion in her voice. After so long in the Hiatus Zone, her patience was wearing thin.

“What? Oh, that. Actually, we kind of thought that might happen if we ever met you,” the other Twilight said.

“Well, could you please stop it?” our Rarity asked, already annoyed but trying to sound as courteous as she could.

“I don’t think we can,” both Fluttershys said together. “See, in our show, we kind of…talk through your mouths. It’s a long story.” Our Fluttershy backed away, wishing the forced vocalization would stop.

“The gist of it is that when we’re close to you, you say what we say,” both Raritys said. “We can’t help it.”

“That’s…a little disturbing,” our Spike said.

“What show are you from?” asked our Rainbow Dash. “I’d heard of the comic guys, but I didn’t think there was another TV show starring us.”

“‘Friendship is Witchcraft,’ of course!” the other Twilight said.

“Friendship is…Witchcraft?” asked our Pinkie.

“Yep!” said both Applejacks.

“Hmm… Why isn’t anything happening to me when you talk?” our Twilight asked curiously, addressing FIW Twilight.

“I guess it’s because Spike and I were still at the human high school when our current hiatus started. It’s been longer than yours, by the way,” FIW Twilight said, almost as though this was something to be proud of. “So I’m not really using your mouth, exactly.” There was a moment of silence, and then she seemed to forget about the apparent inconsistency. “But enough with the formalities! Don’t you know what this means for my fanfics?!”

“Uh…what?” asked our Applejack.

“There are so many more shipping possibilities!” FIW Twilight said excitedly. “Like…now I can ship Rarity and Rarity!” Without warning, she wrapped her arms around the necks of each of them and pulled them together. They looked at each other uneasily.

“I think you’re moving far too fast with this,” our Rarity said, wiggling out of FIW Twilight’s arms. “Though you do look ravishing!” The latter comment was directed at FIW Rarity, of course.

“Why, thank you!” both Raritys said. “But I couldn’t be with a non-Cult member anyway. Would you like to join?” She held out a pamphlet. “Fluttershy is the leader.” Our Fluttershy looked shocked at the prospect.

“Most certainly not,” our Rarity said. FIW Rarity seemed disappointed, but withdrew the pamphlet.

“Well, we should probably be going,” our Twilight said, trying to sound polite. Normally, she’d want to make friends, but something still seemed off about the whole situation.

“Wait! Don’t you want to know about the rest of us?” both Pinkies said.

“Thanks for the offer, but I think I’m ready to go, too,” said our Spike. “It was…nice meeting you all.” He waved and turned to walk away.

“Wait, Spike,” both Fluttershys said as FIW Fluttershy walked over to the railing. “There’s something I want to show you before you go. Come over here.”

“I…think I’ll stay over here. There’s plenty to see over here!” our Spike said, not sounding very convincing but continuing to back away slowly.

“Hmm…then why don’t you come over, Spike?” FIW Fluttershy called to FIW Spike, and the baby dragon did so obediently. “Look at that!” She pointed vaguely toward a spot in the Cancellation Zone where several people in uniforms emblazoned with the Starfleet logo (though this was hard to see from above) were sitting together. However, she wasn't really indicating anything in particular at all.

“At what?” both Spikes asked. FIW Spike pulled himself up on the railing in an attempt to get a better look.

Without hesitation, FIW Fluttershy pushed him over the edge. “I pushed him,” both Fluttershys said simply, and FIW Fluttershy smiled with satisfaction. The rest of the FIW Mane Six (not including Spike, for obvious reasons) laughed.

Our Mane Seven were frozen with shock for a moment, and then the three of them with wings leaped into action. Soaring over the railing as quickly as they could, they raced against gravity as the alarm began to blare again – “GET BACK TO YOUR ZONE. GET BACK TO YOUR ZONE” – and the lasers turned back on. As they dove for FIW Spike, he flailed his arms and legs uselessly and looked absolutely terrified.

Just as one of FIW Spike’s toes grazed a laser, our Twilight, Rainbow Dash, and even Fluttershy managed to grab onto him and stop his descent. As they began to slowly carry him to safety, our Rainbow Dash called over the alarm, “Why would they turn on the lasers if somepony is falling? If you fall, you’re supposed to get cancelled, not…destroyed!”

“I think it’s our fault!” our Twilight called. “The lasers are probably meant to make it easier to keep the cancelled characters in, so that flying ones don’t try to leave! We must have activated them by flying over the edge! If somepony just falls in, they probably wouldn’t turn on.” She didn’t need to yell the last statement because they had crossed back into the Hiatus Zone and the alarm had shut off.

Once they set FIW Spike down, he hugged each of his rescuers in turn. “Thank you so much!” both Spikes said, tears coming to FIW Spike's eyes. In a way, it almost reminded them of the duck they’d seen earlier.

“I’m so sorry, Spike,” our Fluttershy said.

“What do you have to be sorry about?” our Applejack asked. “You weren’t the one who pushed him!”

“But she’s me,” our Fluttershy said sadly, pointing to FIW Fluttershy.

“She is definitely not you,” our Rarity said, glaring at the entire FIW Mane Six (not including Spike).

Now it was the FIW Mane Six who were looking at our Mane Six in confusion. “Why did you save him?” both Pinkies said together.

“Are you kidding me? He’s a valued member of our…uh, your group,” our Twilight said firmly.

“No, everypony hates Spike. He wouldn’t be missed,” both Raritys said. Both Spikes looked crestfallen at this, though FIW Spike expected it and our Spike knew that our Rarity didn’t mean it. Nevertheless, it still hurt to hear such a statement coming from her, even if it obviously wasn’t really her saying it.

“Well, we’re very sorry to hear you say that,” our Rarity said. “Spike is important, even if you don’t seem to realize that.” Both Spikes immediately brightened again upon hearing this.

“You really think so?” FIW Spike asked plaintively.

“Of course!” our Applejack said.

After the display of their horrible treatment of FIW Spike, our Twilight was liking the FIW Mane Six even less. “Who are you, really?” she asked. “I'm sorry, but I don’t believe that you could actually be an official TV series. You don’t represent anything we stand for at all!”

“Wait, you thought we were official?” both Rainbow Dashes said, and laughed. “That’s classic!”

“We’re an unofficial fan-made web series,” both Fluttershys explained. “We have our own canon.”

“Then why aren’t you in the Web Series Division? Or the Fanfic Division?” our Pinkie asked.

“The Web Series Division is being merged with the TV Division,” FIW Twilight said. “More shows are being released on the Internet now, so I guess whoever runs this place thought it would be more efficient. And we do spend time in the Fanfic Division, too – we just get shuffled back and forth every so often. We were actually transferred back here today.”

“Yeah, my daughter and the other Snooty Snark Evaders are still back there,” both Rainbow Dashes said. “And the Mentally Advanced guys, too.”

“I think I saw Catbug around here earlier,” both Pinkie Pies remarked. Since nopony was sure who “Catbug” was, this comment was ignored.

“Wait a second. Your…daughter?” Our Rainbow Dash was utterly perplexed.

“Uh…Scootaloo?” both Rainbow Dashes said, as though this should have been obvious.

“WHAT?!” our Rainbow Dash yelled. She paused for a moment. “Okay, this is just too weird,” she said to our Twilight. “I think we really should get going!” She began flapping her wings and rose to hover above the group.

“Well, it was nice meeting you, but I think we’ll be on our way,” our Twilight said. “And you need to learn to treat Spike better!” she added angrily.

Our Mane Seven finally started to walk away, but the FIW Mane Seven began to follow them. “My parents are babies!” both Pinkie Pies shouted.

“No, they’re not!” our Pinkie Pie called back, offended that the other Pinkie was making her call her parents names.

“No, they’re literally babies!” both Pinkie Pies said as our Mane Seven tried to walk faster in the hope of gaining some distance and losing the others in the crowd. “They were dead, but I brewed a time portal and now they’re alive! But they’re babies.”

Our Mane Six continued to walk even faster, but the others kept following them. Maybe they really were big fans – to the point of being members of the stalker variety. “I married my-“ FIW Twilight started to say, but she was interrupted by an announcement over the loudspeaker.

“NEXT UP: THE MANE SIX AND SPIKE,” it said. “OF MY LITTLE PONY: FRIENDSHIP IS MAGIC.” This clarification was obviously necessary due to the “Friendship is Witchcraft” presence in the area, but it also served to confirm that the announcement was actually meant for our Mane Seven this time. Upon hearing it, they broke into a gallop and the others finally gave up on following them.

“It’s not creepy!” was the last thing they heard, called out by FIW Twilight in apparent relation to whatever had been cut off by the loudspeaker.

“Well, that was certainly…something,” our Applejack (who can go back to just being called “Applejack”) said.

“I didn’t like them very much,” said Fluttershy. “No offense.”

“I didn’t like them, either. Did you see how they treated other Spike?” Spike asked. “That’s why I decided I’m coming with you!” This statement was clearly louder than the rest of what Spike had said, and everypony looked back to see that FIW Spike was still chasing after them, apparently in desperation.

Feeling sorry for him, the Mane Seven slowed down and allowed him to catch up. “Let…me…come with you!” he said, out of breath from all the running and with his hands on his knees.

Twilight glanced at the rest of the Mane Seven. “I’m sorry,” she said with sympathy. “Actually, I think we’re all sorry,” she clarified. Everypony nodded. “But you can’t come with us. It’s nothing against you, but you’re just not canon to our show. We can’t have two Spikes. The TV Police would never allow it.”

“But…” both Spikes said, “But I don’t want to go back with them.” FIW Spike was heartbroken – he thought he’d seen a chance to escape, but even these ponies wouldn’t let him come along.

“Well, we can’t leave you while you’re still sad,” Pinkie said. “Oh, I know!” She pulled a long balloon out of her hair and twisted it into the shape of Spike. “Look, it’s you!” She tried to give it to him, but it didn’t seem to help.

“You’ve just got to get your confidence up!” Rainbow Dash said. “Show them that you matter!”

“I don’t know if I can do that,” both Spikes said sadly.

Our Spike put his hand on FIW Spike’s shoulder and said firmly, “Yes, you can! Sometimes I used to think that I wasn’t important, too, but I am. You just have to show those ponies that you can be just as valuable a member of their group as any of them are! You can do it!” He paused. “Say it with me! I can do it! I can do it! I can do it!” FIW Spike joined in for the last part of this chant.

“You’re right,” both Spikes said. FIW Spike had begun to perk back up and seemed to actually have a spark of confidence in his eyes for once. “I can do it!” both Spikes said one more time. FIW Spike thanked our Mane Seven again, then ran off to find and confront the FIW Mane Six. Nopony was sure whether he would actually have any success, but at least he would be happy for a little while.

“That was very kind of you, Spike,” Rarity said. “I think you actually got through to him!”

“Oh, it was nothing,” Spike said bashfully. “Now, let’s go! On to season 5!” Once again chattering with excitement, they hurried toward the exit of the Hiatus Zone, this time confident that the call was really meant for them. And sure enough, the TV Police who were guarding the door let them head right on by, giving them only a glance before returning to an argument with a man in a suit who seemed to be trying to use some kind of psychological technique to convince them to let him through a few months early. It wouldn’t be long before they would be back in Equestria…

Author's Note:

Thanks to Sherclop Pones for creating "Friendship is Witchcraft!"

This chapter was posted on the day the premiere date for season 5 was announced to be April 4th.

Comments

[2fab4u]

The way they treat FIW Spike is so funny and sad at the same time.

[The Ohvist]

Huh? So we're getting Duck Tales back again?

[Hillbe]

What a beautiful creature who are you?

------- I'm your daughter Crystal Clarity a Dracony.

The Fimfiction zone !

Spike !

[Nightmare_Shinigami]

5703285

Eeyup

[LakieLegion]

shouldn't there be a 'Completion Zone'? cause I'd think that the characters from a properly completed show wouldn't end up with the guys who were properly cancelled

I personally think it'd be an area where characters from shows like Star Trek and How I met Your Mother would hang out in their retirement, instead of being forced into an eternity of living with the sad sobbing sacks that are the Cancelled shows

[SgtFrog]

5763059

I'd think they would be in a sort of heaven, a higher plane of existence.

And FiW...I have mixed feelings about it. I appreciate the work that went into it, but they try too hard to be edgy with the shock humor, like they're trying to be a pony-version of South Park or Family Guy.