Chapter 21 - Craig VS Blue
"Today could not get any worse!" I quietly said, evaded the patrolling group of royal guards left and right, as I evacuated Porussia citizens from an attack that I wanted no part of what so ever.
I look up and find a strange glowing object flying towards me. It reminds me of something from Zelda but not quite. It looks like it has a blade on a part of it with two sides and two Cutiemarks on either side adjacent. One is Princess Luna’s and the other is Princess Celestia’s.
"Not the face!" I screech. I hear someone talking and look at the amulet glowing. "Hi my name is Craig. If ever you are in danger, are scared, frightened or even just need an ally to stand by your side in your darkest hour. Call on me and I will come and do everything in my power to aid you." I kick the sword but it doesn't move. I tap it and it glows brighter, nearly blinding me. “Hello.” I state blankly, not actually expecting anything to happen.
*Flash*
My polarized visor prevents me from getting blinded again. A human kinda? is sent sprawling in front of me from an unseen portal. He has black hair with a set of green eyes and is holding a guitar. As he begins to stand up he moaned “I fucking hate getting dragged through portals, I really need to learn to ignore these headaches.” He then looks towards me and says “Are you the one who summoned me?”
I look at him blankly. “You what mate?”
He then sighs and says, “Did you find an amulet that looks like a sword that glowed before I arrived?”
“Eh… This thing?” I pick up the aforementioned object and wave it in front of his face.
“Yeah that's my token.” He then looks at me and asks, “Have you not heard of the Displaced before?”
“If you aren’t referring to slipstream space or something like that then I have no idea what you are talking about…” I answer.
He sighs and says, “No the Displaced are beings who have been sent from one reality to another.” He then looks at me and says, “It looks like you got Displaced as a spartan from Halo.”
"Uh... Does this have anything to do with having over 10 personalities?"
Craig looks at me and says “wait multiple personalities… Oh hell you must be Church, Epsilon or the Alpha depending on your perspective and yes you got changed into him in essence you have all of the Freelancer AI with you including Delta, Sigma and Omega."
I do something that I know freaks out everyone and my voice becomes distorted and is like a combination of all the Alpha fragments as their holograms appear outside my armor. "We. Are. Meta." I shake my head.
He just shrugs and says “at least you're not bonded with a symbiote from the Marvel Universe and have Discord in your head, not that they both aren’t a good thing."
Randomly, another amulet falls from the sky and hits me in the head again. "Seriously? Is it supposed to do that?"
He just looks at me in confusion then say “no not really heard of the same person getting multiple copies of a token. Strange”
"Huh. So about this "displaced" topic, if that were true then what are you even supposed to be?"
He then laughs and says “My terms of Displacement was different to most other. I wasn’t tricked by a merchant but was dragged through by Discord after years of him torturing me back on earth, So i ain’t actually a copy of anything.”
"Ha. Yeah um about that... I knew something was wrong with that guy as soon as I saw him. I just was too curious and plus, who doesn't like to love life on the edge from time to time?"
Craig rubs the side of his head and says “point taken, but anyway is there anything specific you want help with?”
"Uh... Yeah. How do I make these... tokens." I pick up his token and throw it in the air and wait for a few seconds before I catch it with one hand. "Might make my life a lot more interesting."
Craig smiles and says “First you need to find a object that you want to use as a token.”
I detach my energy sword and hold it up waiting for Craig to continue. "Okay..." Craig just looks completely frozen in thought so I walk in front of him, drop my energy sword and unsling my sniper rifle, aim it over his head and let loose a round, causing a shell casing to eject from the side and a very loud gunshot to be heard for miles.
Craig shakes his head, strangely unfazed and says, “Sorry was just remembering the process. Right after you have decided what you want your token to be you need to… what was it… oh yes put some energy into it and then put in some information about yourself that others will hear, you heard the one I used."
"Uh... Energy. Let's see... Energy... I leave my possessed armor and jump into my energy sword which is still laying on the ground. "It's a sword not a fighter jet! No but in all seriousness, if you ever need someone to hack into technology or just talk or fight, summon me, Epsilon-Church." The energy sword duplicates, leaving the original unchanged but with a copy right next to it which is glowing. I exit the sword and re-enter my armor. "Anything else?”
“In terms of your token? Not that i’m aware of. However if I’m right about Church you're not normally a amazing shot… no offence”
I was about to get angry but I realized something. "Well I'm good with fluke shots when it comes to ricocheting. But that requires a surface."
“Ah yes… The only reason i was asking is because i was wondering if you wanted me to calibrate your rifle to you so you can fire it more accurately.”
Pinkie Pie suddenly pops out of thin air. "You will do no such thing!" She screams with a satanic scowl before disappearing.
"Uh... Maybe you could do that really fast?" I whisper to Craig.
“ok just fire one bullet do i know how much i need to adjust for you”
I pick up my energy sword and attach it to my hip and then aim the sights of my sniper rifle at a tree near an abandoned town. I fire, and the round plays (What's that game with the ball and you have to keep it from going down the hole with two flippers and stuff? Oh yeah... Pinball with the houses quite literally. After a few seconds all the windows are shattered. "Uh... Is there any way for you to make a setting so I can switch between Church's usual accuracy and extreme accuracy?" For reference from now on we are going to call his usual accuracy flukeshot and then the extreme accuracy deadeye.
Craig then smiles and says “I believe i can by the way if Pinkie comes after me whilst i’m sorting this could you please stop her or i may have to use one of my little tricks”
A Pinkie Pie that looks strangely holographic appears and speaks in an electronic voice, "The Pinkie Pie 4th wall breaking army has no reason to attack you if you keep flukeshot aim as a setting." She disappears.
"I will never get used to that shit. It's like an army of pink deadpool equines." I throw my sniper rifle at Craig who catches it.
“OK give me a few minutes” he then closes his eyes and the rifle levitates from his hands ands begins to hover in front of him. seconds later it begins to slowly change as a small switch begins to form on the side of the gun and it slowly falls back into his hands. he then opens his eyes and says “Do you mind if i just take a test shot?”
I shrug. "Go ahead."
He then smiles and says “Thanks.” He then brings to look down the scope and takes one shot that bounces off the wall of the tallest building in the village and hits the same spot as mine. He then smiles and says “flukeshot works” Craig flips the switch and once again looks down the sight and aims straight at the tree we hit. He then pulls the trigger and a bullet goes flying towards the tree however when we look where the bullet hits we see the tree begin to slowly shake then topple to the ground as Craig looks at it in shock and shouts, “What the hell! Thats insane” he then passes the gun back to me and says “You try.”
I take the sniper rifle and aim at the center ground of the village to see if it gets lodged into the ground instead of bouncing like flukeshot. What happens next is completely accidental. The entire ground starts shaking intensely and every building in sight starts to slowly sink to the ground until all that is visible is a giant crater. Craig and I look at each other and nod and we slowly back away.
He then says “I think i need to reduce the power of that setting.”
I look at him like he's gone insane, not that he would ever actually be able to tell. "Uh. No thanks I think I want to keep this setting."
Craig asks me the million dollar question, "Why is there an infinity sign on your sniper rifle ammo counter?"
"I dunno. WHOA WAIT A MINUTE!" I yell. If that means what I think it means does that mean... "Hey Craig?"
“Yeah, what do you think it is?”
"Have you seen seasons nine and ten of Red Vs Blue?"
“Yeah saw up to the start of season 13… why?”
"Let me sum it up for your. Agent North. Super fast sniper rifle. Basically automatic. See where I'm going with this?"
“I think so.”
I pull up the rifle and time seems to slow down as imaginary targets appear in my field of view and I slowly right myself and fire automatically taking them all out one by one. For Craig however... Earrape.
He then drops to the floor covering his ears in pain.
I hear some flapping of wings in the sky and turn around to see a couple dozen chariots of pegasi, the Elements of Harmony, and the Royal Sisters. I quickly run towards craig and tap him rapidly. He looks at me and removes his hands from his ears. I motion behind me and ask, "Know a teleportation spell?" I ask desperately.
“Yeah but only when I can focus” he then mutter “Bii Camo quickly” with that he instantly disappears completely from view.
I focus on Omega and he does what I need to do without hesitation. A nanosecond later I'm completely invisible but since Craig and I are relatively close in distance we can see each other.
"Fan out and find the traitors!" Princess Celestia orders her guards who all salute and jump off the chariots and start searching for us.
"Uh Craig? Do you think you can help me find us a spot to lay low for a while?"
He then smiles and whispers to me “No problem you just get to the forest, i’ll give you a window to move.” With that he begins to move towards a wall across from the guard and a faint glow appears in his hands and a small tube appears. He then pushes a small dart into it and it shoots towards one of the guards and he begins to fly towards one of the other guards and begins to attack him. As soon as the other guard see’s him then they begin to head towards him in an attempt to subdue the mad pegasus with that we both begin to run into a nearby forest.
We reach a spot deep inside the forest with Craig panting and me waiting for him to regain his breath. Craig's cloaking had already worn off half way through the forest while mind had just now deactivated. "Delta, report." I order.
A holographic green spartan appears and speaks, "They did not see us leave. There is a 99.4% chance they are too busy still trying to subdue that guardspony."
"Good. Did you mark Craig as friendly?"
"Done." Delta disappears.
Craig then stand up and says “Good don’t want to be hit by that gun now, there wouldn’t be much of me left after if it connected.”
Gamma and Delta appear suddenly in front of us and Gamma talks in his Stephen Hawking voice, "Your displaced conversation earlier." I regard him curiously. Delta continues for him, "Theoretically that would mean things from the universe your costume was made about would start appearing in a space rift. Correct?" What? Is he saying what I think he's saying? "Uh Craig? Does that actually happen?"
“Does what happen?” Without hesitation and very confusingly, the two ai fragments repeat the entire conversation.
"Does it?"
“Umm i’m afraid i don’t know i haven't heard about it happening, but saying that i haven't heard of multiple copies of the same token appearing before so who knows.”
I groan and point up. "I think I know why they asked that now." Craig looks at where I'm pointing.
"Aw... you've got to be fucking kidding me." A pelican that is very much on fire and getting closer crashes right next to us after a few seconds.
"Ok Craig. I'm going to ask you a question and I want you to answer it truthfully. Okay?"
“OK what do you want to know?”
"Why did you say the forbidden words and evoke Murphy's law?"
“I don’t understand what you mean?”
"Then why is there a pelican gunship... Wait. Gunship? Holy shit! Help me open the back!" I rush over to the back of the pelican and try to pry open the hatch but it doesn't budge.
Craig then walks up to the door and places one hand on top of it and some blue tendrils seep in between the gaps in the hatch and spread out and then rip it off the door completely removing it.
What is seen inside has brought many to tears with its beauty. ROWS upon ROWS of every single type of weapon is inside it. "Is that a fucking gravity hammer?! It is!" I pick it up and put it on my back. "And an incineration cannon?! Craig! We're rich!"
He then laughs and says “Until Celestia find this and find a way to use them on us.... we need to take what we want and destroy the rest, she can’t get a hold of this stuff.”
"Do you have pocket dimension technology?..."
He then look at at the staff on his back and says “maybe but i’ve never used it before the guy i got this from said this could cause insanity” he then reaches for the staff and says “but it’s that or ponies wielding these weapons”
"Is that a token?"
“yeah it’s from a Displaced i met recently, It gives me access to something called the warp.”
"Is the warp a pocket dimension?"
“I think it can be used that way… Only one way to find out” he then smashes the staff on the floor and a small portal appears beside him. “Come one let's get this stuff away”
"Wait!" I take the staff from him and hit the ground with it extremely hard. Nothing happens. "I'm an AI I can't really go insane. So... maybe I can replicate the effects of the staff by hitting something with it or something? Would that imbue the thing I hit it with if I charge it with energy?"
He then looks at me and says “I don’t think you can get it to work.” He then looks at the staff and says “We have no time to mess with the portal we need to get this stuff out of here.”
"Fine. I'm going to try something." Suddenly all the fragments of Alpha appear in front of me and Craig's eyes widen. "Time to go meta." I suddenly feel stronger, more angry, and many other feelings. My armor starts to change until I'm taller and look exactly like the Meta's armor except mine is blue. I run towards the pelican and slam the hatch shut before literally grabbing the whole fucking thing and throwing it into the portal. After a few seconds I revert back to normal, drained. "I didn't think that would actually work."
“You and me both” he then hits the staff on the floor again and the portal closes, Craig then proceeds to put the staff back on his back.
"Erm... So how will I get some of weapons if I... wait a second. Are you serious? I just realized something. These weapons were all at infinite ammo and energy." I grab the incineration cannon and it forms in a really cool way before finishing in my arms. "Then again... I have no idea how we would even get energy for forerunner weapons in the first place."
Craig shrugs his shoulders and says, “I don’t either but…” He then stops and says “hide quickly”
We then activate active camo before disappearing from sight.
Seconds later Twilight, Rainbow Dash and Applejack walk towards where we were standing previously.
I then hear Applejack say “Ah heard him and that other feller over here. Where'd they go?"
Craig then looks at me and starts a psychic link with me then says “Let me lure them away.”
I nod at him "Did you get any weapons from the gunship?"
He just shakes his head and says “Nope but i won’t need it just give me a minute” he then quickly changes from standing on two legs and instead turns into a Dark Blue pegasus with a black mane and tail along with green eyes. He then nods his head as his camouflage fades as he begins to walk carefully in front of Applejack and then promptly collapses.
Seconds later they look at him in shock and run over to him, at this point i realised what he is up to as i see a small image of a bullet hole in his back hooves.
"We have to get him help! What if Church is being possessed? He might not be in control of his actions! Rainbow Dash." Rainbow turns to Twilight, floating in the air. "Get Princess Celestia, the Elements of Harmony, and the rest of the gang here!" Rainbow Dash salutes and takes off in the direction of her leader.
Huh. I thought as I see Twilight and Applejack thinking of a battle plan and not noticing Craig's body slowly dissolving until after he is already gone. By then we are already far away.
2 hours of running later
Well... more like me just running nonstop 40 miles an hour while carrying Craig. I finally slowly down and look back. We already passed three villages by now, not that anyone saw us in the thick of night. I put Craig down who wakes up as soon as I drop him.
He then slowly sits up and mutters “I need to stop making my injuries work so effectively. I even felt it then.”
"Yeah well... Now what do we do? We definitely aren't in Equestrian territory anymore if that city has anything to say." I point at the gigantic mountain range in front of us with a huge ass fortress on it.
Craig then looks at me and says “what is this place?” We both hear something that nobody wants to hear.
"For the holy flag! Kill the blues!"
"Please no." I moan. A bunch of screaming and gunshots is heard and then nothing. "Ok so you know what? I want to go home." The shooting renews again afterwards.
"I think we both know who that is… but he can’t exist… Let me try something” He then changes into a red solder with Pink Armour and shouts “I didn't know you could put a flag there! What a tight fit!" I swear you could hear the record scratch as every single red and blue soldier just stare at us.
I take a moment and then shout while pointing somewhere randomly "Hey he has the flag!" Everyone looks at a blue soldier who actually had the red flag. He sighs.
"Well shit." And everything dies. Except well us. Cause you know. Can't have that happening.
"How do I send you back?" I ask curiously.
He then looks at me and says “Most people you just say our contract is complete but can get back whenever we are ready. Anyway do you want to sort out what you need from the ship?”
"Open the portal" I order bluntly.
He then smiles as he changes back to his original form and grabs the staff off his back and smashes it against the ground again causing a massive portal and the ship to just fall out of it. Strangely the ship appears brand new again.
"That's epic, a repairing portal. Not that the ship was really that damaged. Take any weapons you want but leave me with at least two types of every one of them. It looks like I have a new personal vehicle."
He then looks at me and says “you sure?”
"Yeah it will give me more space anyway. Not like we need ammo since everything is infinite."
He then smiles and says “Ok then." He then walks in and takes a look at what was there and then kneels down and picks up a helmet that was on the floor and says “Am i Ok to take this?"
"Eeyup isn't that an EOD helmet? That's fucking epic." And it was. It looked to me like a black eod helmet with red eyes.
I then look at it and say “may need to change it’s colour but it looks ok” he then carefully places it over his head and says “what do you think?”
I simply give a thumbs up. "Anything else? You can still grab one of everything you know."
“Ok” Craig then look at a Sniper rifle similar to the one i have and places it on his back he then proceeds to pick up a standard assault rifle, pistol, a few grenades and a rocket launcher. he then walks back out and says “I think that will be enough”
"Okay well if you ever need anything just call." My token falls from the sky and hits Craig in the nuts before falling to the floor. I cringe. "Anyway. Craig. Buddy ol pal, our contract is complete”."
Craig then smiles and salutes me before he disappears and says “If you ever are in trouble you know who to call”
Stats
Page generated in 0.026 seconds
Total duration
1,075 users online
1,961,272 hits today, 2,054,621 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
Well well. Would you look at that. Ahriman helped after all!
6467531 thanks for the extra information
6505773 You have to put in to thought though Discord Warps their minds and he's been doing as similar thing to Craig over years it's not to much of a streach to think he'd erase key information or even know a quick way to block information