Summer's End (Morpheus) Part 3
After sating Twilight’s curiosity and my emotional hunger, we decided to try a few more games. Unfortunately, all of the ones we tried ended up with me having an overwhelming advantageor disadvantage.
The tug of war in particular was frustrating, as there was little ve could do to improve our team’s efficiency. It was a game of strength that relied on proper and timed applications of force—something I’m good at—yet most participants were already so in tune with the rhythmic pulling between each side that I ended up merely being dead weight until we were covered in mud. Thank the hive that Twilight knew that cleaning spell, because I otherwise would have spent a week trying to clean myself properly.
Finally, we decided to simply give up on the games for this year and to wait until next year when Twilight had a better idea of what I could do. Tired, hungry, and sweaty, Twilight had to clean us both with her cantrip again while we wandered about looking for something to eat.
The crowd around us watched in morbid fascination as Twilight and I ate our lunch. Each crisp crunch of beer-battered goodness sent spikes of curiosity flowing over me. It was overly sterile with a hint of ash—less the taste of hospital disinfectant Twilight normally gave me, and more like a morgue or crematory.
It was the sort of curiosity one knew they were going to regret.
Indeed, every so often somepony would brave the trip to the fish and chips stand, order a meal, and promptly stare off into space or squirm after the first bite. Pleasure and loathing mingled equally as ponies came to the conclusion that fish—and possibly other meats—were in fact quite tasty, and I was doing my best to contain my chuckles at the faces ponies were making.
Popping another piece of fish in my mouth, I chewed, swallowed, and grinned at Twilight. “Ve don’t know what you were worried about.”
Twilight nibbled one of her own pieces, glancing at our spectators. “I wasn’t worried about myself. I was worried about everypony else’s reaction.”
I licked my chops as another piece went down my gullet. “Twilight, you’re a princess. If anything, you eating fish and chips is just going to open up ponies to the idea that it might be okay to be an omnivore.” I nodded to several of the tables around us that were seating the more adventurous of our audience. “I can just taste the guilty pleasure they’re feeling. You keep eating in the open rather than behind closed doors and soon ponies will start thinking it’s normal.
“You really think so?” Twilight smiled, dipping a fry in her ketchup. “I always figured it was just another reason to hide from the crowd at Burger Princess.”
“Well…” I drummed my stabilization rods open and closed, “...it could also result in everypony labeling you an outcast and freak, but the chances of that are minimal.”
“Then why are you bringing it up?” Her smiled became a little too big to be natural.
“You asked?” I shrugged. “And there are a number of implausible events you’re still interested in. I mean, you made a big deal about our prediction that Shining would come raging out of the north when the papers announced we were dating, but he knows the special circumstances of our relationship. Such an outcome was unlikely at best.”
“He’s overprotective to a fault….” Twilight groaned. “I was just a little bit worried he’d forget about the whole ‘dating’ scheme with what you told the papers.”
“Perhaps,” I snapped up another fry, “but Cadance certainly wouldn’t.” Indeed, Cadance was hoping I would fall for Twilight, so ve doubted she would let Shining ruin that. Not that I could tell Twilight that.
“I suppose….” Twilight stared morosely at her tray, the little plastic basket now devoid of anything but crumbs and tartar sauce.
“Hey.” I nudged her with my grease-flecked muzzle. “You were the one who said today was a day for no worries, so stop that. You taste awful right now.” Not exactly the truth, but her emotions tasted very sobering compared to the rest of the fair.
She sighed, then took a deep breath, inhaling and exhaling slowly before she smiled back at me. “You’re right. My brother will sort himself out eventually.” She pulled out her checklist. “Let’s see. Next is getting our fortune told.”
Levitating our garbage into a nearby trash can, we rose and made our way through the tables surrounding us—a sizable number of ponies squirming in a mix of guilt and pleasure as they tasted the wonders of fish for the first time. Stepping back onto the main road, we squeezed through the crowd. The festival was packed like sardines in a can, and ponies jumped slightly at the sensation of chitin on fur when I bumped into them accidentally.
“There it is!” Twilight pointed, teleporting us the rest of the way.
As reality reasserted itself, I stumbled slightly, putting a hoof on Twilight’s withers. The tent in front of us was slightly larger than the average stand—more of a small temporary house than anything else—with alternating pink and maroon stripes and several pointed peaks holding blue and yellow flags. I stared at the sign driven into the ground—three crystal balls, two blue, one yellow, over a funnel cake—and tried to contemplate the odds of the Enigma lying beyond the curtain shrouding the entrance.
It was almost a given, with the smell of funnel cake wafting from inside.
We stepped inside to find a waiting room full of balloons and beads. Coloring books and crayons sat on the tables instead of magazines, and one of the cursed clocks from Sugarcube Corner ticked loudly as it hung on the wall.
“Hi, guys! I wasn’t expecting you for another two hours!” Pinkie stepped out from behind a curtain of blue and yellow beads. She was shrouded in a shawl and turban, nested hoop earrings jingling merrily as her ears danced a jig. “Good thing my ears are flopping and my frogs are tingling!”
“A lot of the carnival games just aren’t fair when a changeling plays.” Twilight frowned. “I had to knock a lot of items off the list, so I brought us earlier than normal.”
“Well then, Madame Pinkie Pie is on the job!” The perky pink party pony pronked through the curtain again, and Twilight and I followed.
“Don’t you normally have more business?” Twilight tilted her head to the side, examining the many tapestries draped on the tents wall.
We were in a hallway of sorts with a stream of art detailing some event ve couldn’t ascertain the nature of. It looked like it had something to do with a rock farm and tentacle monsters, but that simply couldn’t be right.
“Yeah!” Pinkie nodded, pushing another curtain back. “We usually have a full waiting room, but they all ran for it when my Pinkie Sense went off. Probably thought I said, ‘Tingling frogs! Ear flop!’ rather than, ‘Ear flop! Tingling frogs!’” She giggled.
Twilight’s face scrunched as she went through the curtain. “Let’s be thankful it wasn’t the other way around….”
We entered a room that was best described as pink. It was technically a thousand odd cloths draping everywhere in just as many shades of not-quite pink, but, in all honesty, Rarity was probably the only pony in Ponyville who would be able to tell that. It was far easier to simply average everything into pink. As we all settled onto one of several elaborate cushions, and Pinkie began humming and hawing, running her frogs over her crystal ball in mysterious ways.
The room darkened except for a sole ray of light illuminating the table, and bundles of incense around the room began to burn of their own accord, filling the room with a heady, dizzying, scent. In the now sweltering heat, the beads hanging from the ceiling began to sparkle and waver like stars, and the very room itself seemed to spin around us beyond the solitary patch of light in the center. Galaxies and comets shot past us as the universe itself rushed by in an instant.
Twilight and I watched uneasily as the flashy dramatics escalated into a surreal wonder, both of us beginning to fidget at the sights and sounds presented to us. The influx of information made me shudder a few times, and I leaned into Twilight so she might shield me from the madness of the Pink Menace.
“Is this normal?” I whispered, trying not to distract the Enigma.
“Oddly enough, no.” Twilight whispered back, face scrunching. “I’m just hoping it’s Pinkie being Pinkie, and that she didn’t spike the incense.”
“I see…” Pinkie’s voice wavered as she attempted to maintain an air of mysteriousness. “...somepony—" she winked at me “—and someling are getting a couple really cool birthday presents.”
“Well, Madame Pinkie Pie,” I chuckled, “I hate to burst your bubble, but, while that might hold true for Twilight, changelings don’t celebrate the day they hatch—" I shut my mouth as ve realized a second too late what I was saying could only invite trouble.
“You don’t celebrate birthdays?!” Pinkie’s voice rang through the oddly warm darkness of space around us.
Ve contemplated screaming for help, but my vocals chords had frozen in terror of saying something else idiotic. Twilight, on the other hoof, was stifling her giggles, but she quickly stopped trying to hide it—bursting out laughing in a less-than-regal, whickering snort.
Then, there was a popping noise, and the Pink Menace’s hair deflated.
Twilight frowned at the sight, while I backpedaled into space and hissed at the transformation. It was the only proper response for me to take, though. After the last time she did that, ve reviewed her files and stumbled across an old file so small it would have escaped notice had it not been classified.
Ve had found The Party of One.
The Pink Menace now stared at me with big puppy dog eyes and a far too flat mane. “Oh, I’m so sorry for you. I wish there was something I could do to make up for—"
Her hair exploded into curls again as she began to vibrate with dangerous levels of excitement. “Of course! I can throw you and all the others enough parties to make up for it! It’ll be like a birthday marathon and can go on for weeks and weeks and—"
Twilight shoved an oddly cupcake shaped galaxy that was floating past us into Pinkie’s mouth. “One Hoof in the Mouth Special for Pinkie.” She giggled as her friend began to chew vigorously. “Sorry, Pinkie, but I don’t think Mo wants that. Right, Morpheus?” She nodded to me and I lunged at the lifeline.
“No! No, I don’t!”
Pinkie’s hair drooped again, and I hastened to continue.
“Why celebrate birthdays when you can celebrate the Chrysalling? Nasty stuff, hatching from eggs all wriggly and worm-like. Ve mean, larvae don’t even last a few hours—almost immediately entering the first Chrysalling—so why not celebrate that instead?”
We didn’t celebrate it right now, but she wouldn’t know that I was merely being rhetorical. Even as she perked up once more, though, ve knew I’d need to run damage control, and thus I dutifully informed the hive of our new holidays via a mass message spell. I immediately received several replies asking if the Pink Menace got me drunk again from the lords, but got several thousand more joyous thanks from the rest of the hive. Smiling, ve resolved to never let the Enigma find out about this particular bluff, lest she spend the rest of her life attempting to throw birthday parties for everyling to make up for the ones they missed.
Finally, Twilight’s giggling subsided, and she gestured a hoof to the universe dancing around us. “Alright, Pinkie, not that I don’t love the special effects, but we kinda need to go. Can you turn the room back please?”
Comets continued to flash past, and galaxies drifted by. I poked a hoof at the utter blackness beneath me and felt ground, yet I could not see it. The illusion was nigh perfect.
“Oh, that’s easy.” Pinkie pulled a small dangling chain that hadn’t been there a second ago, and there was a clicking sound like a lamp turning on as we were suddenly back in the sweltering room full of burning incense. “Did you like the show by the way? Dissy helped me add a little oomph to the readings.”
“Dissy?” I arched an eyebrow.
“Yeah, Dissy! You know, Discord?”
I blanched. Such an innocent nickname was ill-suited to the lord of chaos. Still, it would be a lie to say there wasn’t a certain appeal to the dazzling stars we had beheld.
“It was certainly an eye opener.” True, although perhaps not entirely in the way ve meant for Pinkie to take it. As awe-inspiring as it was, it was also just as overwhelmingly disconcerting. Not the display itself, that is, but the idea of the Pink Menace and Discord working together.
“I certainly enjoyed it.” Twilight hugged her friend. “Just make sure Discord didn’t rig it to do anything else.”
“Already did!” Pinkie squeezed back.
“Well, it’s time to get going then. Next is…” Twilight pulled out her checklist.
“Actually, Twilight, could we stop by Webber and the Echo triplets to see how they’re doing? I’m curious as to how good their business is going.” I shuffled from hoof to hoof, unsure if it was wise to interrupt the list.
Twilight’s face scrunched, mouth moving almost imperceptibly as she ran the numbers. “Sure!” She finally responded. “They might be at the other end of the fair, but I’m pretty sure we have more than enough time to spare with having to drop all the games. That is, unless you want to have more time for rides?”
“No thanks, I’m good.” I shook my head. “I get motion sick just looking at most of these rides.”
“Well, Pinkie here was in charge of most of them this year.” Twilight chuckled.
“I was!” The earth pony was vibrating again. “It took me forever to convince the mayor they were all safe.”
“Probably because they’re all screaming metal death traps…” I muttered only for Twilight to elbow me.
“What was that?” Pinkie fluttered wide, naive, blue eyes at me.
“Nothing!” I coughed, and Twilight elbowed me again, pulling me out of the tent by my ear tube.
As we left, Pinkie sneezed. “Itchy nose, pinchy knee? Again? Those kissing booths must be so busy.”
Echo, Echoe, and Ekho had set up shop in an isolated alley near the Round Up roller coaster, which was dizzying just to look at. The ‘car’ had no restraints, relying on the centrifugal force of the spinning bowl that held everypony to keep passengers still. Pressed into the wall with nothing but a rapidly rotating view of the sky—and sometimes ground—it was perhaps the most disorienting contraption ve had ever seen.
The triplets were running a trio of kissing booths. Their stands were covered in soft violet velvet and cushions. Curtains enchanted with privacy spells were draped over the outer layer of the booth—on the off chance such was desired—and cheesy romantic ballads rang from a phonograph stationed on the middle booths counter.
It was a rather charming little setup that was no doubt lost on Twilight with the much more alarming sight of Echo, Echoe, and Ekho kissing their current customers as a certain lavender colored alicorn. The lines—stretching on for a fair few ponies—watched on with a mix of rubbery embarrassment, leaden shame, and tangy curiosity.
Echo— Echoe— Ekho? Someling noticed our approach as they pulled back from a customer. A flash of emerald flames revealed Ekho—or so I thought—and she waved to us. “Hiya, Princess! Here to help? You’re really popular today.”
Twilight’s eye twitched once as she squeaked incoherently, and the lines vanished in a cloud of dust. There was the sound of an avalanche as about a hundred ponies scrabbled over the alley wall and stampeded down the road on the other side. Overall, it was not the worst reaction ve could have expected, but it would have been better to avoid agitating Twilight.
If only I had known the triplets were taking other ponies forms. Alas, as far as ve were aware, Twilight had asked them not to take the form of actual Equestrians for things like this.
“I thought… I told you… to only take on guises of ponies you invented yourselves when doing… this….”
My mistake. She didn’t ask them. She told them. That carried even more weight than a simple request. I gave a disappointed look to the triplets and showered them with the leaden bullets of shame they ought to be feeling.
They squirmed from the somber nature of the heart to heart, trying and failing to shield themselves with the steely resolve of their purpose. “We’re sorry, Princess—"A full truth probably, given the nature of their dry sorrowful response as my leaden rain continued to assault them. "—but almost everypony wanted us to become another townspony. If it makes you feel any better, it was just a little kissing.”
“You didn’t… use your other permit?” Twilight’s leg twitched in a half gesture that time. It seemed her body was slowly unfreezing itself.
They all prostrated themselves. “Oh, no, Princess! Ve all knew that’d be taking things too far. Ve all would rather starve than betray your trust like that.”
“Good… good….” Twilight shuffled towards the alley entrance. “I’ll just be over here, wiping my memory of the past five minutes. Morpheus, you check… whatever it is you wanted to check.”
I glowered at the girls as she passed out of sight. “I expect you to apologize for this. She did not need to see that. What possessed you to take her form when she told you not to?”
The triplets glanced back and forth between each other. “Well, we didn’t at first, but there was this really cute yellow stallion—like, heartstoppingly cute. Blue mane, hunky for a pegasus, and the build of an off-duty guard. How could we say no to that?”
I arched an eyebrow. “Off duty? How could you tell? What if he was an undercover guard making sure you followed Twilight’s order?”
The three froze, the mish-mash of uncertainty washing off of them. “We… didn’t think of that.”
“No. You didn’t, so be glad Twilight’s too nice to do that,” I sighed. “And please try not to take advantage of that unless it’s a matter of life and death. I get it was an accident here, but…” I trailed off.
“Regardless,” I shook my head, “I suppose you’ve answered my question of whether or not business is going good, and that’s really all I wanted to know, so I’ll be out of your fins.”
Webber’s stand was just a block over. It was a simple stand, made of wooden planks, with a sign that claimed the doctor was in and would advise for one ticket. He was in the middle of a conversation with Applebloom and Big Mac, but, when he saw us, he flipped the ‘in’ sign over to ‘out’ and waved us over. In kind, his current companions nodded to us both as we came over.
“My Lord.” Webber started to prostrate himself before remembering it wasn’t needed and turning it into a small bow. “I’ll be with you in a moment, as soon as I help Mister Macintosh.”
I smiled at the progress, small as it was, and rewarded him with a nibble of my shockingly sweet pride and joy—literally shocking, given the pride. He reluctantly accepted, and I almost frowned, but I carefully hid my disappointment. It wouldn’t do to just guilt him into accepting it.
“Howdy!” Applebloom offered her hoof and I braced myself before I took it, my stabilization rods sliding into place just in case. She did indeed have a terrifyingly strong grip—just like her sister—and I soon lost my hoof to the almost violent upheaval of the hoofshake. “It’s nice to see y’all again!”
Big Macintosh thankfully settled for a single, simple, silent, sympathetic, nod in our direction. “Howdy, Miss Twilight. Mister Morpheus.”
“Big Mac!” Twilight beamed. “I wasn’t expecting to see you here. It’s wonderful that you decided to relax a little instead of just working the farm again.”
The piece of grass between his teeth shifted as he mulled her words over. “Ah’ve been to the fair before.”
“Yeah, once!” Twilight giggled. “After that it was back to the same old same old.” She tilted her head to the side. “What are you up to? Have you tried any rides yet? They’re next on our list.” She pulled out the checklist for emphasis.
“Well…” Big Mac hummed a deep, sonorous, baritone, “...remember how the last time Ah came to the fair, I was looking for some nails?”
I blinked at the strong mixture of sugar and spice that came with the thought. It must have been some fair to make him so wordy, and ve had a feeling Applebloom had been involved that time to, because her emotions did the equivalent of a cringe as he mentioned it.
“You’re kidding.” Twilight laughed looking to Applebloom. “Again? You stole all his nails again?”
“Ah woulda put them back!” Applebloom groaned. “But More Power went a little crazy with the nails. This years crusaders darn near built the most sturdy catapult ah’ve ever seen, using every single nail we had. There weren’t any nails to put back.”
Big Mac sighed. “It’s the same dang gazebo, too….”
Twilight snorted in a very unprincess-like fashion. “Of course it is. Was the hardware store destroyed by wayward fireworks again too?”
“Eeyup….” Big Mac sounded so very, very, tired.
“Oh, my.” Twilight managed to tone her mirth down to giggles. “You really could use some advice then. I see why you came to Webber.”
“About that…” Webber—eyes glassy—finally broke into the conversation. “Ve might have a solution for you. How many nails do you need?”
“Only about fifty or so.” Big Mac shrugged.
I felt the ping of a message spell telling me where to look in the Hivemind to see Webber’s plan. My eyes glossed over as ve looked through it.
“That just might work.” I thrummed, slowly beginning the required shifts to my biology. It was a unique challenge to create a series of detachable spines that operated similarly to our tails. The memories recording the changes were ancient and out of date—full of little holes from a lack of proper use and maintenance—making us need to adapt to any problems on the fly.
When I finished, I pointed my hoof at Webber’s stand, and—with only a brief click and whistle as a warning—I shot a spine from one of my fetlock cavities at high velocity, embedding it almost entirely into the wood.
“That’s far more efficient than trying to make detachable porcupine spines.” I nodded as ve replaced the memories with our updated version—making a small note of the original design. Turning to a slack-jawed Applebloom and ever-stoic Big Mac, I nodded. “Take Errant and go grab some of our carapace cement inside Castle. They’ll need it to replace the carapace they’ll be transferring into the spines. When you have that, take them to the farm—or wherever this gazebo is—and have him provide the nails for you. It’ll be good shapeshifting practice for him.”
I looked to Webber. “Unless you object?”
He shook his head. “No, that was our plan too. It’s an excellent chance to see if he has potential as a drone and I can message him all the pertinent locations in the hivemind.” He turned to Applebloom. “Just be sure to treat him to a honey bun or some ice cream afterwards.”
“Well, alright then… If y’all think that’ll work.” A rather bemused Applebloom headed off, Big Mac politely slowing himself to match her smaller pace.
I nodded to Webber, and bared my fangs in a grin. “Ve would have taken forever to think of that, but, then again, you’re my advisor for a reason. Keep up the good work.”
“You know, I’ve never seen or read of anything quite like this.” Twilight had left my side at some point, examining the spike embedded into Webber’s stand. “How did you even manage this?”
“I’ll tell you some other time.” I thrummed. “At least give me a chance to keep some things secret and mysterious for a while.”
She huffed. “Fine, but I expect detailed lectures then.”
“Whatever you say, Twilight.” I chuckled. “Whatever you say….”
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Good shit.
You could say Morpheus just nailed it with this solution.
8173696 I want to make some joke about shots fired but I'm too tired
This is just plain fun, with a variety of things that go right, and amusingly so.
Pinkie just had fun, and twilight with the fish was a blast. Oh how I had amusing laughs with that. The shout-outs for the comics are a blast.
Overall, you run this chapter with a fun tone, and its just fun seeing everyone be everyone.
Its light hearted, fun, and everything that I am loving in this story.
Minor negative thing, you got a thethe in there.
We need fanart of the triplets scene, stat!
I spy a Flash. Shining's agent sent to keep an eye on his little sister, perhaps?
8174684
Aha! At least one person noticed! Yes, Shining sent Flash as an undercover agent because of the papers. I'm not actually sure whether or not to use it as a plot point, but the set up is there.
8175145
I'm a little disappointed none of the other princesses got clone-time. Then again, maybe that's what the curtains are for. And they should have borrowed Spike's comic collection for "study material". Heh. Could use the form of Matter Horn and still rake in the bits. And who could resist a smooch from an amorous Mane-iac? (Who could escape? Yikes!)
I suppose the trio can still salvage their Kissing Booth with the comic characters idea.
Have some free typos. :3
Can't wait for the next chapter.
I almost want a triangle, with Flash as the third angle. Almost.
8184900
Nah. I might not hate Flash Sentry with the burning passion of a thousand suns -- that's reserved for Brad, his human counterpart -- but I don't really like acknowledging their relationship as anything more than a crush and some potential hang ups. I mean, don't get me wrong, Flashlight can actually be done effectively, but it's not my style. I like the idea of a failed first romance because it opens doors for character development.
8185107 That works for me.
"More Power"
Dammit Tim!
8292343
I'm so glad someone caught that.
Am I the only one that thought that was Twi's equivalent of "I expect you to return the favor"?
Like, for some reason her dirty talk would consist of "lecture me harder, daddy" and "what me to slowly take these notes off?"