Again, what the hell?
“It's a slumber party!” The pink party animal excitedly announced in front of me, my tentacles debating on whether or not to simply teleport her away from my home. “C’mon!
My right eye twitched as Alice joined Pinkie in the wild celebration, silently wondering how Pinkie even knew about the slumber party. Even Fluttershy and Rarity, who both showed up in a quick flash of pink, seemed confused as to why they were even there.
“She works fast, doesn't she?” Nightmare let out a low whistle. “It looks like she already did your work for you. See? There's the bunk beds.” She pointed out with a laugh, before screaming at something I didn't notice. “Duck!”
There was a loud bang, confetti engulfing my vision as I jumped in surprise of the cannon that just fired in my face. My tentacles angrily erupted from my back, tearing through my clothes to get rid of the thing that just blinded me. They quickly flashed it away and turned towards Pinkie, ominously ‘staring’ her down with a few stray purple sparks running off all four of them.
“No! Bad girls!” I slapped their sides with my free hand, using the other to try and remove the confetti from my face. They drooped in sadness and withdrew into my back, giving Pinkie one last mean look.
“Sorry, Dakota!” Pinkie loudly apologized. “The cannon can go off for, like, no reason.” She then put a hoof to her chin in thought. “I really should get that looked at…”
I chuckled, smiling at the party pony. “Nah, it's fine.”
Rarity politely coughed, gaining everyone's attention. “Excuse me, dears. Why was Fluttershy and I dragged here?” She deadpanned, narrowing her eyes on Pinkie. “I have to finish my fashion projects tonight and Fluttershy always has some kind of critter to care for.” Rarity then gave me an apologetic smile. “It’s not like I'm not happy that you are back, dear, but I still need to run my business.”
I nodded in understanding and turned to Fluttershy, the mare shyly trying, and failing, to hide herself behind her mane. “What about you?”
Fluttershy squeaked at the attention, nervously eyeing Alice, the hybrid now happily devouring her ice cream on the top bunk. “U-Uhm…” She stuttered, seeing Alice’s fangs. “Maybe I should go home, Angel will throw a fit if he doesn't get his bedtime salad, sooo…..” She slowly walked to my door, only to be pulled back by Pinkie.
“Don’t worry, I have Spike on that.”
Meanwhile….
“How did I... get here?” Spike asked out loud, wondering how he got to Fluttershy’s place from the Library in ten seconds flat. “I was getting ready to sleep….” He groaned, running a hand down his face. “Huh?” He pulled a sticky note off his chin, giving it a resigned stare once he saw the signature balloons that made up Pinkie’s cutie mark emblazoned in the corner. “Watch the critters for tonight. There's ten sapphire cupcakes in it for you.”
He tiredly blinked, frowning at the note. “She thinks she can kidnap me and make me a foalsitter for ten cupcakes…..” Spike thought for a moment, then nodded. “I guess it'll be alright, so long as Angel and I still have our truce…”
And in the window of Fluttershy’s cottage, he didn't notice the little white ball of pure evil pounding its paws together as it stared at him.
Back to me.
“....Maybe I should-” Fluttershy nervously started, only to be interrupted by her charismatic friend.
“It'll be fine!” Pinkie assured, nodding her head rapidly. “Spikey-Wikey can handle the great tiny evil!”
“Wha-?”
“I said he can handle Angel.” Pinkie quickly corrected herself, before turning to Rarity. “Thanks to your clients ‘mysteriously’ coming down with the flu…” Pinkie barely hid the mischievous smile that appeared on her face. “The deadline for your projects have been extended for a few days.”
“You didn't…..” Rarity stared wide eyed at her pink friend.
“What did I do?” Pinkie innocently asked, tilting her head in honest confusion.
“Ugh… fine, dear. I'll stay for the sleepover.” Rarity shook her head, deciding not to press.
“I-If Spike has everything handled, I-I think I can stay for the night.” Fluttershy shyly said, having got Alice to start sharing her ice cream with her.
“So…. What the plan?” Alice asked, giving Pinkie a look as she put her bowl down.
“Oooh! Makeovers!” Rarity excitedly suggested. “Dakota has an entire collection of fabulous clothes and makeup in her closet!”
“No.”
Rarity’s enthusiasm immediately deflated at my tone. “But, dearie…. With a makeover party, you can learn how to use your makeup.” She smirked victoriously at my curious expression, obviously planning something. “Then you can do your own makeup for Gala.”
“What's this about the Gala?” Ash asked, coming into the room. “You mean the Grand Galloping Gala, right?”
“That's the one!” Pinkie confirmed as she dug around in her mane, pulling out a shredded boot and giving it a look before throwing it away.
“Yes, and the princess sent Twilight an extra invitation for Dakota the other day.” Rarity explained, giving Ash a polite smile. “Where's that magician you let stay here?”
“Eh, Trixie decided to turn in early.” Ash scratched the back of her head, yawning a little before she gave us all a look. “I'm gonna do the same, too. Just don't be loud, okay? Oh, and Dakota, since nothing too bad happened, you're going back to school tomorrow, so don't be up too late.” She smiled at me and then left the room.
Once everyone in the room heard Ash’s bedroom door shut, everyone, except Fluttershy, gave me a look that I can only call pure evil. “Oh…no….”
One agonizing hour later…..
“Rarity…” I glared at the offending unicorn, feeling too ‘pretty’ for my liking.
Rarity had Alice hold me down as she went for my closet and pulled out an assortment of clothes and makeup, my tentacles practically laughing at me. Chrysalis even helped Rarity with applying the makeup, holding my head still with her hooves. It didn't help that Alice was laughing at my situation, barely able to breath after a familiar frilly black and red dress was forced onto me.
Rarity was a little surprised at the sight of my new tail when she stripped me for the first time, almost ripping it off before she realized it was a part of me, not some kind of fashionable scarf that I wrapped around my leg. Pinkie just didn't care, only wondering if it can hold a cupcake. Fluttershy gave the cutest little ‘woohoo’ when she saw it, claiming that I simply had to have a tail and that it just grew back. Neither Alice, Chrysalis, or I had the heart to disagree with her.
“Oh, don't be like that, darling.” Rarity said with a smile, satisfied with her work. “I think it makes you look rather…. noble.” She nodded to herself. “Yes, like a princess.”
Sighing heavily, I nodded as I looked at myself in a mirror. “I… It okay.” I agreed, begrudgingly deciding to go along with it. I twirled a little, the dress fanning out with the action. “Good?”
Chrysalis blushed a little, giving me an encouraging smile. “You look great!”
Alice giggled and put another spoonful of ice cream in her mouth. “Yeah! Looks great!” She then frowned at her suddenly empty bowl. “Mind if I get some more?” She asked in English, holding it up.
“Yeaaahhh, no. Not happening.” I gave her a knowing look, speaking in English. “All that sugar has to go somewhere, and I'm pretty sure I don't wanna find out the hard way. you've already had, like, five bowls of the stuff...." I shuddered a little in realization that it was probably too late.
“Oh, dearie! I found another fabulous outfit for you to model for us.” Rarity excitedly held up an all too familiar red sailor uniform, the red ‘eye’ on its left shoulder staring at me. “This style of clothing is simply marvelous! Just feel the material of this, I don't even know what it's made of…”
“Wait, wait, wait… What did she say?” My eyes widened, catching something I really hoped I haven't heard. “The unicorn who makes clothes for a living doesn't know what this one is made of?”
“Uh, yeah. She said that she doesn’t know.” Alice confirmed in English with a curious tilt of her head. “What's so wrong about that?”
And that's when the ‘eye’ blinked.
I pursed my lips and gave my tentacles a nervous sounding command. “Take this one away, girls. I have a bad feeling about it.” I frowned as my tentacles warped the offending outfit away to wherever, making Rarity visibly flinch once they got too close to her horn.
“What was that for? It’s just clothes.” Alice gave me a look.
“I now live in a world full of magic and other things I can't really explain. From my experience, one shouldn't take any chances in said world.” I snorted, giving Alice a bland look. “That outfit could've been the real deal, and things would be even more crazy if it were.” I then frowned, scratching my chin in thought. “Maybe I should hide some of the stuff in my closet, you know? I could've sworn I saw Majora’s mask….” I shuddered. “If that thing is the real deal… and, I swear to Jashin and Sheogorath, if there is a certain set of cursed rings….”
Alice blinked at my seriousness, then smiled at me, remembering something. “What about those balls with the stars in them? Do you think they're the real deal too?” She giggled a little at her sudden idea. “Maybe we can summon that wish granting dragon, I remember there being one that can grant three wishes.”
“Wait…. WHAT!” Nightmare shrieked in surprise. “Where are they!? And why haven't you used them yet!?”
“It's not what you think. The one she's talking about needs me to speak in Namekian, and we both know I can't do that.”
“Um, dears?” Rarity slowly interrupted giving Alice and I a curious look. “What are you two talking about? It sounds like it's serious.”
I cleared my throat. “Er, uh, magic stuff.” I slowly explained in Equish, struggling for the right words. “Bad magic, might need to hide.”
“Oh, well, I'm sure it can wait until the morning.” Rarity assured with a smile, obviously not believing me. “If it is really so bad, Twilight can handle it.” She then gave my tentacles, which were just hanging out of my dress sleeves and sending amusement as they looked at me, a slightly disgusted look. “And, if those…. appendages of yours are so powerful, they can do something too.”
I smirked at the feelings of pride emanating from my tentacles, nodding at Rarity. “Kay, I wait until morning.” I then gave her a sorry look, turning my cuteness level up to twenty. “Sorry about the clothes…”
Rarity then suddenly wrapped me in a bone crushing embrace. “It's fine, dearie. I'll just have to find another, even more fabulous outfit for you.”
“Oh god….” I muttered in English, resigning to my fate for tonight.
Two more beautiful hours later, just as Dakota went to sleep.
“Oh, wow!” I gasped in amazement as I recognized where my dream is taking place, smiling widely as I saw the familiar bat symbol in the night sky from my spot on a roof. “Yes! Gotham city, you are way better than any nightmare.” I fist pumped in victory.
“What is this place?” Nightmare asked from behind me, footsteps coming up behind me. “And what are you wearing?”
“Huh?” I blinked at what she said, looking down at my clothes. “Oh, wow… I'm Catwoman, deal with it!”” I giggled, striking a pose with my claws.
“Cat…..Woman?” She slowly asked in disbelief, questioning my sanity. “Are you okay?”
“Never better! I have a feeling that this dream is gonna be a little therapeutic.” I gave her a small smile, feeling very relaxed. “She’s not the person I really thought I'd dream myself as, but at least she knows how to have some fun.” I noted to myself, balancing myself on the edge of the roof. “I need this.” I gave Nightmare a look, suddenly realizing something. “Oh, Luna might drop by soon, so ya might wanna get outta here, just in case.”
I didn't even wait for a response, dashing and jumping across the numerous rooftops with a happy laugh. “Yeah! Look at me go!” I laughed, speeding across the city on all fours, heading towards nothing in particular.
“You think you can just brush me off?” Nightmare asked as she flew above me, sounding a little annoyed. “We need to plan my revenge!”
I frowned as I got onto the top of the GCPD headquarters, giving the dark alicorn a burning glare. “We can plan later. Just let me have this. This is my first nice dream since I got to Equestria.” I then turned up the heat on my glare, silently promising a fate worse than death if she interrupted this dream again. “Sooooo, it's either join me and have fun…. Or get the hell out of my dream.” I then gave her my most innocent look, tilting my head to add some cuteness.
Nightmare winced, then sighed. “I suppose I choose to join. Just give me a moment to blend in, just in case.” She gave me a small smile, her horn glowing. “Think of someone.” She told me, furrowing her brows in concentration.
I smirked, knowing just the person.
Nightmare's form quickly melted into an inky blackness, it changing it’s shape into a more humanoid form. The blackness then seeped away, a vibrant red coloring her now long hair and a sickly green for her skin. Leaves formed a leotard for her, covering most of her body.
“Hah! You're that little girl Poison Ivy!” I laughed, seeing her as short as I am. “Catwoman and Poison Ivy…. Sounds like a wonderful duo, don't ya think?”
Nightmare took a deep breath, calming herself down. “Sounds like fun. What kind of dream is this going to be?” She asked, curiously looking around. “A superhero dream?”
“Nope! A villain dream!” I laughed, pointing in the direction of Arkham Asylum. “And first order of business is… to bust out Harley!” I smiled widely, excited to be evil for once. “Maybe even let Crock loose, the poor guy needs some love.”
“I have no idea who those people are, but I'm in.” Nightmare giggled, putting a hand on my shoulder. “Have more dreams like this, and I think we're going to best of friends.” She honestly told me, a blue flower budding out of her hair. “So what's the plan? How do we get in?”
“Well, I'm gonna find a vent and shut down some security systems, maybe even find a way to remotely open some cells.” I scratched my chin in thought “Then I'd let Harley and Crock loose during the chaos, then I'd see if there's any other villains I want loose….. God, if Riddler is there I'll lose my mind.” I laughed, remembering my favorite version of the Riddler. “And then, if the bat shows up with his boy wonder, I'll try to take ‘em on, with your help, of course.”
“Wha-?”
I interrupted her with a hand over her mouth. “Shhhhh…. Just roll with it.” I giggled at her unamused glare, pulling my hand away. “Now….. Let's go and break out some baddies!” I cheered, leaping off the roof without waiting for a response and landing onto another building on all fours.
After a few minutes of leaping across rooftops, we both stopped at a safe distance from the prison, planning our little break out. I informed Nightmare about Ivy’s powers after a minute, the dark alicorn giving me a feral smile in glee at what we're about to do.
Once we finished, Nightmare held both of her hands out towards the prison, massive purple flowers erupting from the ground and destroying everything outside the place, green pollen visibly raining down on the area and knocking out everyone who breathed it. She then turned to me, smiling proudly at what she did, earning a wide smile from me.
“Well, that's not quite what I had in mind….. Whatever, Leeeeeerrrroooy Jeeeeeeenkiiiiiiins!” I yelled out my battlecry, giving Nightmare a quick high five and running head first into the prison, the pollen not affecting me as I ran through it.
“Hi, boys!” I smirked at the shaking guards inside, giving my best Catwoman impression as I strutted confidently past them. “You really should talk to your gardener, those plants outside are preeetty crazy.”
I then saw that one pissed himself, the dark stain on his pants growing by the minute, making me laugh as I opened a door and let myself into a hallway filled with prisoners in orange jumpsuits. Each of them yelled at me to let them out, some even begging me as I confidently strutted past, ignoring the noise and going into another door, this one labeled ‘special prisoners’.
The circular room I entered had four steel doors and one plexiglass cell with one familiar woman sitting calmly on a cot, looking up at me with a disappointed frown. “You're not my puddin’.”
“Nope, but I'm here to bust ya out.” I told her with a smile, punching the keypad next to her cell and opening it with one quick movement. “Go on, I've got some others I wanna bust out.”
“Wait!” Harley yelled as I went over to one of the steel doors, running out to follow me. “Who are you?”
“Just a pesky cat that wants to make some villainous friends.” I smirked as I stuck a claw into the lock, jiggling my finger a bit and unlocking it in seconds. With a quick thanks to dream logic, I opened the door, peering into the darkness. “Hey, anyone home?”
“Grrrrr….” The man growled from the darkness, yellow eyes practically glowing as they glared at me. “What do you what?”
“Nothing.” I smiled at him, opening the bigger part of the door to let him out. “Crock, I just want ya free. Nothing as awesome as you should be caged up in this place.”
“.... Nobody's ever said that to me before.” He grumbled in surprise as his massive green scaled body lumbered out of the cell.
“..... I like it.”
“You're welcome. Harley, who's all in the rest of these?” I asked, scratching my chin in thought.
“Well, there's Bane.” Harley pointed at one. “Then there that Clayface and Mr. Freeze. What? Are ya gonna bust all of us out?”
“Not tonight, Catwoman.” A familiar gruff voice spoke up, a man in a batsuit dropping down from above. “Why are you doing this? You usually steal.”
I smirked at him, placing my hands against my hips. “Well, I just felt like making new friends. Harley, run for it. I think your puddin’ will be pleased to know you're free.” I motioned for her to run, pulling out my whip with my right hand as I watched her run past Batman, Harley ducking under a batarang with a laugh. “Crock, you up for letting Mr. Freeze out for me?”
“I'm on it, girly.” He grumbled, stomping over to the steel door on the far left and grabbing its edges with his massive clawed hands, ripping the thing off in one quick movement. “There ya go. Want some help with the bat, or should I grab Freeze and run?”
I chuckled, giving the oversized gator man a look. “Grab him and run, I'll deal with Batsy.” I smiled widely, taking on a battle stance. “Oh, and help him out, would you? I actually like the guy.”
“Hmmm…. Fine.” Crock nodded after a moment, giving Batman a look after he pulled out the blue man inside with one arm. “Good luck, girly.” He waved and ran through the wall, leaving a perfect Crock shaped hole behind him.
“And then there were two….” I laughed and looked at Batman, cracking my whip against the floor. “Where's the boy wonder?” I curiously asked, circling him at a safe distance. “Oh! Did you loose another one? You just keep running through them.” I laughed. “I feel like I should be making a priest joke….”
“Dealing with Ivy.” Batman coldly informed, glaring at me. “How about you come in quietly?”
“Nope!” I laughed, flicking my wrist and sending my whip towards his face. “When has that ever worked?”
“You'd be surprised.” He dodged, grabbing my whip and yanking me toward him, sending a quick jab towards my face.
With a theatrical cat hiss, I ducked under the blow, releasing the whip and bringing my foot up towards his groin, a loud clang echoing throughout the room. “Gah! Metal there?! What the hell!?” I flinched at the pain, taking a few quick jumps back. “Why?!”
“Joker.”
I nodded in understanding. “Ah… makes sense.”
Then the air rippled, causing time to stop in the dream. Luna suddenly warped into existence in my dream, the very air distorting around her entrance. I facepalmed at her entrance, letting out a deep disappointed sigh.
“Hi, Luna. How's it going?” I asked, dejectedly scratching the back of my head. “You're actually ruining the best dream I had in a bit…”
“Oh! We apologize for our transgression.” Luna bowed a little, giving me a small frown. “We simply couldn't wait to question thou about thine past, young Dakota.”
“How are you speaking English?” I blinked in surprise, then scratched my chin, having a little trouble with my mask. “I assume the last visit’s result is now a perk for you while in the dream realm, or something.” I shrugged, throwing up my hands in defeat. “Pfft! Magic, I tell ya! The most unpredictable thing I've ever seen.”
“Thou sounds like Star Swirl.” Luna giggled in amusement, raising a brow at me.
“Whoever this Star Swirl is, he sounds like Merlin.” I sighed. “Then again…. Canterlot does sound a lot like Camelot. Huh, I wonder if there was a Lancelot here.” I shook my head, giving Luna a look. “Whatever. So, you wanna question me? Go ahead, I guess.”
“We want to learn more about thine past. Sir Spike sent us a journal when he followed after thee during thine…. we can only assume it was a blood rage during the Ursa attack, the likes of which allowed thee to cross dimensions. The journal held the methods of how thee were made.” Luna gave me a sad smile, taking a few tentative steps toward me. “We’ve managed to translate a few passages, thanks to Spoon's notes on thine written word, but we can only discern so much.”
I took a deep breath, a certain bulky man in a luchador mask poofing into existence next to me, jumping up and punching the man in the face, earning a grunt from him.
“What are thou doing?”
“Punching Bane.” I deadpanned, punching him again, sending him to the ground. “Just relieving some frustration.” I gave him another kick and sent him away in a cloud of smoke, happier after that little stress reliever. “Alight, ask away. Then I'll ask mine.”
“Er, where did thee come from?”
“Earth.”
Luna frowned at the answer. “Really?”
“Yeah. Earth, Terra, the blue marble, that's my home. More specifically the good old U.S of A.” I smirked, remembering a joke. “Heh, ‘Murrica!”
“Hmmm…. Are thou alright? From what we read, the experience thou went through would've broke many ponies…” She draped a wing over me, nuzzling me a little in reassurance.
Sighing again, I gave her a small smile. “I’m…. I think I'm going to be okay. I've got my tentacles, they never stop sending love down their connections, ya know? It's like constantly hugged. Then I've got Alice, Spoon and Crys-er… Moss and Ash. Then there's my pets.” I chuckled a little. “I’ve even got you and Celestia, well, I know I have you. Celestia… Ehhh, I dunno about her. Then there's the whole Changeling hive.” I broke out laughing at a sudden thought. “I wonder if I'm going to get a statue of me in there. Oh my god, I can see it now! Dakota, the endless ocean of love, savior of our kind!”
“Thou are quite the positive one.” Luna giggled at my attitude. “Are thou really the grown stallion?”
“Hey, I've accepted this!” I backed away from her, giving her a cute pout. “What's so wrong about that? It's not like I'm gonna be Mr. Herbert in disguise, I'm gonna wait until I'm older for the grown up stuff.” I then blinked, then turned a little green. “Oh, no…. Why did I have that image in my head…. Bad brain… Bad.”
“At least we don't have to worry about that from thee. Now, there's another thing we must question…” Luna took a deep breath. “We know that thou… dispensed of thine captor, but we would like to know his name.”
“Ah, Doctor Crazy didn't put his name in the book, did he? He kept callin’ himself Dust. The guy kept ramblin’ about how his brother accidentally put him there, didn't mention his name.” I raised a brow. “I think he was from your side, he had these paintings of ponies everywhere over there. I think I can get us there later, if you really wanna see the place, shouldn't be all that hard to get there again if I already did it once.”
“We would like that very much, if it isn't too taxing for thee.” Luna nodded in agreement. “Sir Spike also found a jar filled with tentacles….” She unsurely trailed off.
“Okay, ya might wanna keep them hidden.” I gave her a serious look. “Or at least put the rest inside me, I like to think I'm mature enough to handle whatever power I'm given. I sure as hell know this…. They are going to be taken and used by some bad guy the moment he/she/it catches wind of them.” I raised a brow at her, frowning. “Just gonna be honest with ya, I dunno if the element's little friendship beam will work against them if they get a new host. Their magic is… I wanna say universal, like it can mimic any kind of magic, fictional or not. I haven't really had the time to try to practice with mine very much, but I get the feeling that, if I really wanted to, I could pull off the infinity blade works or fairy law.”
“That…. sounds bad.” Luna scrunched up her face in confusion.
“Actually it would be a good thing if I have them all. I'd be the only one to do all that overpowered magic.” I confidently smirked. “That’d make me your trump card if the elements fail somehow. I'd actually be really happy to do that.”
Luna kept frowning at me. “Thou wants to be a hero?”
I pouted at her disbelieving tone. “Hey, I like to think I'm a nice guy.” I grumbled a little self consciously. “I'm sure that you and your sister both have some kind of great baddie or two sealed and hidden away somewhere.” I pointed an accusing finger at her. “I know from experience that they will escape somehow.”
Luna turned away from me, humming a little in thought. “Thou… May be right.” She slowly replied, opening up a portal out of my dream. “We must take our leave now. The tentacles are going to be…. stored somewhere secure, until we discern that thou are ready for the responsibilities that come with them.” She informed as she stepped toward the portal. “And, as for thine insight on the villains we have in equestria, we'll increase the amount of guards.”
“It won't work!” I yelled after she disappeared inside the portal, the thing closing behind her with a quiet fizz. “Heh, they never learn…. And I didn't get to ask my questions, rude." I shook my head, chuckling quietly. “Alright, Nightmare! Ya can come out now! I know that ya were watching!”
Nightmare melted up out of the ground next to me, appearing to have reverted to her alicorn form. “Alright, you caught me. You're pretty good at this.”
I sighed. “When you are warped into a world that is just like a kid's show, ya can just tell what's gonna happen next. And, unsurprisingly enough, not one person is going to take my advice, well, aside from you.”
Nightmare smiled, her wings fluttering a little as she blushed. “It's just so I won't be hit by the elements again….”
“Oh, I have just one question….” I held up a finger, a sudden thought coming into my head. “If you're basically all of Luna’s bad, albeit ‘cleaned’ a bit from a friendship beam. What about Celestia? Does she have her own dark side too?”
Nightmare gave me an evil smile. “Oh, she does. Did you notice how the female population is outnumbering the male?”
I almost broke out laughing, holding a hand up to my mouth. “Noooo…. No way….”
“Yup, that was her.” Nightmare chuckled a little. “If you want to meet her, she's locked away in the deepest pit of Tartarus. Celestia erased all memories and written record of that particular incident.” She sighed wistfully. “I should've broke her out when I got back, maybe then I would've won.”
“What's her name?”
“Molestia.”
“..................” I was laughing so hard, I wasn't making any noise but this hoarse wheezing as I rolled about the floor. “Oh! My! God! Whhhhyyyyy! Now I want to meet her!” I began tearing up at this point. “Seriously, I wanna meet this piece of work!”
“I think she'd like you, too.” Nightmare laughed with me, but not as hard. “A bit too much though, hah! Maybe she’d wa-oh!” She blinked at something I couldn't see. “Looks like you're going to be waking up early.”
“Huh?” I questioned, before everything turned white….
In Dakota's bedroom, 5:00 A.M.
“Uugh…..” I sleepily grumbled as I opened my eyes and rolled over to see my digital clock. “Five in the morning? Really?” I took a deep breath and sat up, wincing a little when the base of my tail decided to bend the wrong way. “Alright, I'm up, guess…”
My stomach startled me with a loud roar, demanding some food. “Well, that explains why I'm up at this ungodly time.” I took a peek at my window. “And its still dark out….. Fine, I guess I can eat.”
I quietly creeped downstairs into my kitchen, peering into my fridge for something to eat. “Now, what am I gonna get….” I hummed a quiet tune as I dug around. “Oh, I know…. Everyone's still asleep, I can get my first burger in a while. Not quite breakfast, but it’ll do.” I smirked in realization, grabbing a few jars and bottles, even a few slices of cheese. “Hey, girls. Wakey wakey….” I murmured gently to my tentacles, awkwardly reaching an arm behind me to nudge one of them. “I need some help quietly defrosting some meat.”
A few minutes later…..
I smiled at my finished creation, a double cheese stuffed burger with some ketchup and pickles to top it all off. “Hmmm…. Can't have a burger without fries…. No, girls, I wanna make them myself.” I mumbled to myself, turning around and leaving the glorious thing on the counter to make the fries, not noticing the yellow and pink pegasus that is Fluttershy come into the room.
“Hmmmmhmm… Cooking up some fries~” I sung to myself, throwing them into the fryer with a satisfied smile.
“Mmmmm! What is this?” I head Fluttershy’s soft voice ask, her voice slightly muffled by her mouthful of food. “It's soo good…”
I almost started screaming in panic when I turned around and saw her eating my special burger, the mare enthusiastically chowing down. “Uh, when did you get up?” I nervously asked her in equish, not taking my eyes away from the sight.
“Well, I normally wake up this early.” Fluttershy explained inbetween bites, happily muching away. “This is really good! What's it made of?”
“Uh..….” I trailed off as she finished it, licking her lips. “You no wanna know….”
Fluttershy gave me the most heart melting confused look she had. “R-Really? I think I do….”
“....Uh, meat. Cow.” I winced as I said it, looking away from the possibly traumatised pegasus.
Fluttershy blinked in surprise, then looked down at the plate, then back to me. “Let this be our little secret.” She winked conspiratorially, showing some confidence I didn't know she had as she pushed the plate towards me. “Do you think you can make another, If it's not too much trouble?”
“Well….. This is going to be a strange day.”
“I agree.”
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Once again, you have gifted us with an amusing chapter.
Fluttershy is a secret omnivore...
I can see that.
Hey, it's omnivore fluttershy! I like that, I like that a lot. Worth being awake at 4:40 am.
Molestia really should've been Starlight's idea of Celestia's evil version in "A Royal Problem" instead of Daybreaker. What a good nod to the fanbase that would've been!
So... Molestia instead of Daybreaker that is popular lately? Poor Equestria. But funny chapter :)
8259389
(Damn you Hasbro...)
There was probably a debate by the writers on this very subject in which they knew they had to go with something different because they knew Hasbro would have shot down the episode in a second...
wait until she gets older for that stuff? would she even be able to age? i mean, she's a doll, albeit at least partially organic, with gears and shit in her. i dont think age will be a factor
Considering the amount of omnivores and carnivores Fluttershy looks after, I'm not surprised in the slightest that she seems to have a taste for meat.
8259395
damn, she looks so cool. I think I'll add another bit about her in this chapter in a bit... She's too cool to just not leave her out.
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8259499
Who the heck is Day Breaker? *looks it up* ah, I'm way behind....
8259648
Dakota might actually be able to age semi-normally. Tentacle magic, baby.
She kinda.... Forgot about that.
8259928
Daybreaker, Was very popular for a week or two in Tumblr. Now it's not as popular.
*giggles*
This triggers muh tisms....
8260421
I'll fix it!
Dang, my autocorrect messed up badly on that one...
8260441
It’s kay, I was actually giggling like an idiot when I read it.
8259928
Technically Daybreaker could be described as nothing more than a projection of Celestia's own inner conflict given physical form in the dreamscape. Since she never manifested outside the dreamscape, one could argue she never actually achieved becoming a real pony.
I love that Flutters is a closet omnivore.
Daybreaker plus Molestia equals Pelvis Breaker!
after just finishing a feels trip im glad i found this
8259928
Didn't the bad guy remove her sex organs if I remember right? If so you would really have to push it with tentacle magic to allow Dakota to develop secondary sex characteristics properly if you do age her.
8270226
She still has most of her girly bits! I literally just looked over all my stuff and I'm pretty sure I didn't say that it was removed. Some bones are replaced though, and Dakota still doesn't know or remember anything other than what I've shown in the flashback.
And, if the tentacles can reconfigure a dying changeling egg into a viable humanoid body, I'm pretty sure they can do some other stuff too. That's why I said semi-normally, but it won't be happening for a while.
8271844
Might have confused your writing with some one else's. It is just one if those things I think about. Kinda like thinking how the little girl in the movie Logan is totally screwed because she has the claws meaning that her skeleton is probably metal too (can't spell the metal but we all know what it is). That would mean she can't grow and would probably be painful as hell since her healing factor would try to be healing the damage constantly from running into the metal while trying to grow. Meaning the kid is doomed to the life of a midget in constant pain for a century at minimum.
I'm tracking 53 stories counting this one compared to everyone else is this a high or low number
hello>>8283445
is spike dead
8285617
Uhm, probably. He'll be fine, this is probably what he'll look like after Angel gets through with him.
s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/f7/88/90/f78890d03c77e7eb7e946c66f4c902bc--jim-carrey-funny-jim-carrey-quotes.jpg
hello>>8287087
I think you should maybe put the dark insignia on Your story
8287175
Eh.... Fine.
8287495
*Sigh* it is okay I just think you added WAY to many details and random things too fast. I would have much proffered that all the cool things like the gears and stuff stayed hidden until a little later and also I want Twilight to get taught the meaning of the phrase of "Curiosity killed the cat." because she just committed THEFT which even in Equestria is STILL a CRIME and because Celestia just says it's okay and shit DOESN'T change that! I want Celestia AND Twilight to get a thrashing for the theft from Dakota. I only have one last piece of advice while the whole I have other voices in my head thing seems cool and all I would honestly prefer a person as your character in Equestria but instead of just acting like how they THINK the character should act they KNOW and act like they ARE the character.
8287522
You're probably the only guy that has been brutally honest about this thing, and I thank you for that. I'll probably go back and patch up this train wreck when I am motivated.... Not gonna be fun.
Noted.
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Well thanks for listening I know writers always have a vision in their heads and all but it never hurts to listen to the ideas of others. If you ever want an editor to help you with what few mistakes I have seen PM me a gmail for me to send stuff too and what chapters you want edited and I will see what I can do friend. You remind me of myself I have hundreds of Ideas but don't want to write them all myself but I always am afraid that if I get another writer to do it that they will screw my idea up royally.
So the person who dreams about being a villain for fun, has repeatedly stated how much they admire various villains, Is consorting with the "Evil" half of Luna and Chrysalis the only Villain to straight up reject reformation in the series, And was literally in the middle of a "good" dream where she breaks various villainous characters out of jail And fight an iconic hero, is asking to keep the McGuffins out of villainous hands by giving it to themselves.
Do you see the disconnect here? I know that Dakoda is not actually evil, but she doesn't have a very good record here, I too would be worried in case she inadvertently helps someone who is truly sadistic with her power.
Also, is there a reason Celestia and Luna can't give the Tentacles to someone else trustworthy? I mean Dakoda is pretty strong already, does she really need even more magical mojo to prank with? Why not Fluttershy? just like give her two to protect her and help with the animals. Or maybe Cadence, what Demi-Goddess of Love is lacking Tentacles? a terrible one if your asking me.
Everything else I feel has been said already.
This is great so far! Love how everything is going and I love all the references. I hope Dakota gets together with Spoon or Alice, or both =P ^^ they seem cute together. Can't wait till this is updated some more
8317529
As the show has increased in budget so has the details to the background, if one pays attention over the seasons the male demographic has greatly increased
8319422
I liked Fred...
8264126
This isn't dead! I'm Just slow about updating this thing. Nobody should worry! I'm working on it and my Ralts thing!
Please update
8418928
i take it that the cross over didnt go well?
8442060
and my Ralts thing.... Well, I just added the second chapter to that recently and it failed moderation. 
so im gonna add yet another chapter to it.
It's going fine. Its just every time I look at it, I feel like it's too short, so I just keep adding to it. It should be added pretty soon.
8442939
wait ralts thing? as in the pokemon ralts? can you link me that
8442943
Uh, yeah. It's a displaced fic. Dude sent as a Ralts to early equestria. Just a moment and I'll PM you the link.
8442945
HAZA I like those kinds of stories there always fun to read
8299933
Arguably, Dakota just pre-empted Chrysalis turning evil in the first place by giving her all that love. She's also been slowly reforming and befriending Nightmare: If it works for Discord, why not Nightmare?
8442945
When can we expect the next update?
8453333
by Halloween, at the latest.
I've been through four different versions, before settling on the one I'm on now.
be prepared for nightmare night!
Uh.... *looks at draft*
8453407
You also said that you would be making a Ralts Story, but i haven't seen it on your page. is it not loading?
8453426
gonna add a third chapter to it and resubmit it, let's hope it passes this time.
It just didn't pass moderation.
Any idea when the next chapters gonna come out
What is a Loli from