• Member Since 20th Feb, 2015
  • offline last seen Jul 14th, 2017

Fire Feather


I am a pegasister who likes writing. And ponies. So...yeah. Don't judge my stories too harshly.

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Long ago, before Luna became the creature know as Nightmare Moon, and before Sombra and Discord were problems, her and Sombra were friends. Maybe more that that, actually. They were researching ancient alicorn magic, and some of it corrupted Sombra. Yet he and Luna still liked each other, and searched frantically for a cure.

But not every illness can be cured, and not everypony can be saved.

Also, it has sad elements, but there's more funny.

Chapters (2)
Comments ( 7 )

This is a really great story! The concept so far is good, and the way you portrayed the characters makes me want to read more! Athough, you need to be careful. Stories like this one can easily go wrong if not done correctly. This could cause a bit of backlash, but it's good just to keep going.
So far, really great! ^-^ I want moar!

-Ace Pilot What would be considered going in the wrong direction? I would like to know.

6149907 Well, there are many instamces where the story gets out of hand, and the cause of this is normally the characters in it become Out Of Character. Out Of Character in the story-verse, anyway. You've set up a certain interaction behavior between Luna and Sombra, and you need to be careful of too much straying from that, and also too much of it. Every story needs a balanced middle. For instance, if Sombra and Luna were to have a fight, but they can't stay angry with one another, you could stretch their feelings out across multiple chapters, and then have them get back together.

The illness can also lead to problems, but I'll touch on that later. ^-^ I hope this helped?

I like it but it does need a little more. I really liked when Luna said "can we fix it?,":pinkiesmile:

I really think you sould write more I loved this chapter.:pinkiehappy:

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