Unplanned Visit
“This is hard, y’know that?”
“You have to know how to write.”
“I can write just fine. I’m just not used to using my mouth to hold things.”
“Well, it’s not like you have magic.”
“Don’t remind me.”
Justin was relearning how to write with his new body. It was frustrating, and more than a little humiliating. Even though Twilight had explained to him that ponies without magic had to hold pens in their mouths to write with, he couldn’t shake the feeling he was being fooled. He picked up the pencil again and, in what could only be described as a childish scrawl, managed to write “My name is Justin.” Due to his lack of experience, it ended up looking like “My nAmE iS JUStIn.”
“Well, that’s certainly an improvement,” Twilight said, looking over his shoulder.
“Can I stop now?” Justin asked, poking his tongue out. “All I can taste it wood and graphite.”
“You’ve only been doing this for an hour,” Twilight chided.
“And I’ve made a lot of progress,” he answered. “Besides, my wings are aching and I need to stretch them.
“Okay, now I know you’re lying.” Twilight took another piece of paper and levitated it in front of him, setting it down on the table. “Now try again. This time only use capitals where you need to.”
“No. I’ve had enough for now.” Justin stood up and ruffled his wings. “I’m going. See ya later.” Before Twilight had a chance to react he galloped out of the library and disappeared into the crowd in the markets.
After fleeing the library, he made his way to Applejack’s stall. “Howdy, Justin!” the farmer exclaimed loudly.
“Hey, AJ,” the pegasus responded. “Have you seen Rainbow?”
“Can’t say Ah have. Knowin’ her, she’s probably sleepin’ on a cloud somewhere.”
“Ah.” Justin pouted and turned skywards. “Well that’s great,” he said bitterly.
“Whassa matter?” Applejack asked, head tilted in curiosity.
“I... still haven’t figured out flight yet,” he muttered, blushing from embarrassment.
“Really?” Applejack gave him a concerned look. “Y’all have been at it a whole week, ain’tcha?”
“Yeah.” Justin sighed. “I feel like a failure,” he said, looking at his hooves.
“Hey, don’t be so glum now. Maybe ya just need the right motivation?” Applejack suggested.
“Like what?”
“Well...” Applejack rubbed her chin with a hoof. “If ya could fly, ya could spend time with Rainbow in her cloud house. Ya think of that?”
Justin closed one eye as he tried to suppress a number of mental images. “I’m not sure I should,” he said as calmly as he could.
Applejack laughed. “Well, there’s yer motivation! Now get goin’, you.”
As Justin walked off with no particular goal in mind, he thought about what the farmer had said. True, he would like to spend more with the mare. And he still hadn’t walked on clouds yet; something he was intent on accomplishing. He knew Fluttershy didn’t mind not flying, but that was her. She needed to be at ground level to do her job. If he was going to get a job as a mail-pony he would have to get the hang of flight. Preferably sooner than later.
He looked around and realised his hooves had carried him to one of the parks outside Ponyville. He wasn’t sure which one, but in the skies above he could see what looked like a palace made entirely of clouds. He knew Rainbow lived in the clouds, and it seemed just like her to let her ego get the better of her and make something like this.
He willed his wings to unfurl and flapped furiously. He managed to get about 50 yards into the air before the fear reaction kicked in. This was the main reason he had had so much trouble flying. Every time he tried to get any higher his wings would lock and he would plummet, typically landing face-first. When he thought about it, he noticed that Equestria seemed to enjoy comical injuries over anything actually serious. As such, he was too focused on staying airborne for any serious amount of time.
This time, he pushed himself upwards, blocking out his fear that he was up high with the thought of giving Rainbow a pleasant surprise. Before long he was level with the cloud house.
He couldn’t help but marvel at how grandiose her home was. He knew Rainbow’s sense of self was incredible, but even this seemed like overkill. The building consisted of multiple rainbow-coloured waterfalls, great pillars that he could only think of as being Roman or Greek in design, and three stories tall.
“Wow,” he muttered.
He increased his altitude slightly and tipped himself forwards to get himself onto the unnecessary winding path. He overestimated how much he had to alter his center of gravity and ended up with a mouthful of cloud, landing with a muted pomf.
He pulled his face out of the cloud and saw that he had survived the journey. Letting out a celebratory whoop, he went to the door and raised a hoof to knock it. Before he could, he stopped to think how there was a door, whether it was solid and even if it was whether or not it would make any sound. Eventually he put his hoof against it and pushed. It slowly swung open without a sound, letting Justin see the interior. Quite simply, it was a mess. There were magazines lying around on the floor and what looked like a pizza box on what could have been a couch (he wasn’t sure because it was white and so was the rest of the room). All in all, it reminded him a lot of his apartment. The only thing that was missing was the mountain of dirty clothes in one of the room’s corners.
He stepped inside, and made his way to the staircase at the end of the room. He wasn’t sure if he should continue, but he did anyways. The pegasus glanced at one of the magazines strewn across a table and did a double take. He looked at it properly, his jaw dropping when he realised what kind of magazine it was. He couldn’t believe that there were magazines like that in a world that seemed so... pleasant. Wrenching his eyes away and trying to forget what he had seen, he went up the stairs.
The next floor was a kitchen. At least, he thought it was a kitchen. The general state of the place was appalling, and that was putting it nicely. The smell of long-since expired foodstuff, unwashed dishes, and other things he didn’t want to think about lingered. He saw what he hoped had once been a head of lettuce: now, it looked more like a small... thing of green and brown sludge. He stepped gingerly around the mess and proceeded up to the third story.
There, Rainbow was sleeping on a fluffed-up cloud: one leg dangling off, wings up, muttering in her sleep. On the wall was a poster of a group of jumpsuited ponies standing in a heroic pose. He remembered her mentioning something called the Wonderbolts earlier in the week and reasoned that the picture was of them. The bedroom looked as though a bomb had hit it. The only thing about it that was neat was the bed that the mare was lying on. Everything else was scattered without a second thought all over the place.
He jumped when Rainbow let out what seemed like a scream. Thinking he was in trouble he prepared himself to leap out of the nearest window. He sighed in relief when he realised that she was still sleeping. He was a little worried that she had screamed and walked closer, making sure to avoid the debris, concerned that she was having a nightmare.
“Ohh, Justin, don’t stop,” he heard her mutter in her sleep. He blushed redder than Big Macintosh’s coat as it dawned that it hadn’t been a scream of terror but a squeal of pleasure. He decided that showing himself out was the best thing to do.
As he edged closer to the stairs he tried to block out what he was hearing. “Oooh yeah,” the mare moaned. Justin had to hold back a groan. He still couldn’t believe that in a world that seemed so innocent such thoughts could exist. His wings popped up with a pomf.
Rainbow let out another squeal. “Ohmigoshohmigoshohmigosh.” Justin shoved a hoof in his mouth to stop himself from letting out a frightened squeal. Not only would the sound have woken her, he considered himself too much of a gentlecolt to do such a thing.
“Yes! Yes!” she screamed. He turned around and saw her face twisted in ecstasy. Justin leaned back, scared. What if she woke up? How would he explain his presence? He had to get out, and he had to get out now. He stepped backwards carefully, trying to get away without getting caught.
He was almost to the stairs when a second scream made him jump with a yelp. Before he knew it he was in the kitchen on his stomach with a colander on his head and a hoof in some unidentifiable pile of sludge.
“What!? Who’s there!?” he heard from above. He stood up and made a dash for the stairs downstairs but was instead greeted by a set of very angry magenta eyes.
“Oh, hey Rainbow,” Justin said as innocently as possible.
“Why are you in my house?” she asked savagely, stepping forward with each word, backing the terrified stallion into a corner.
“I-I-I just wanted to visit!” he admitted. “The door was open, and -”
“That doesn’t mean you can just walk in to somepony’s house!” she yelled, spraying him with spit. For some reason a small part of Justin’s mind registered that Rainbow was cute when she was angry.
Instead of responding, he curled up into a ball and tried to make himself as small as possible. Rainbow Dash was terrifying him right now. “Please don’t hurt me,” he whimpered. He closed his eyes and covered his head with his forelegs, expecting a rain of hooves to come down to try and knock him senseless.
He looked up when he heard laughter and saw Rainbow rolling around on the floor, laughing so hard she had trouble breathing. “That... that was hilarious,” she wheezed.
“What?”
Rainbow stopped laughing and picked herself up, still smiling as wide as Pinkie Pie. “I saw you coming, and I just had to do something.”
Justin pushed himself up and glared at the mare. “So you thought it would be funny to let me think I walked in on you having that sort of dream?” he asked. The moment his mind wandered in that direction his wings popped up again. “I swear, I will start strapping these things down.”
“You don’t wanna do that,” Rainbow cautioned. “It’s not good for them.”
“And how do you know that?” Justin asked, eyebrow raised, mild disgust written on his face.
“I got into a bet with AJ that I could beat her in a hoof-race. She tied my wings down so I couldn’t cheat,” she explained. “It is not what you were thinking,” she stated forcefully.
Justin didn’t respond to that, instead opting to sling the sludge covering his hoof at her. It caught her right in the mouth, wiping the smile off her face.
“Blegh!” she exclaimed, spitting out the foul tasting thing. “What was that for?”
“For playing such a horrible prank,” Justin answered calmly. He ducked as she tossed the remnants of a cabbage at his head and began to laugh. “Missed me!” He stood up and jumped out the nearest window.
“Get back here!” she yelled as he flew off.
It took him a moment to realise what he was doing. “Holy crap! I’m flying!”
Author's note:
This chapter very nearly took a different turn. It would have involved the relationship progressing faster than would be considered healthy, that's all I will say. Also, it would have been creepier than Discord wearing a Mankini.
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Nicely played rainbow.
first rainbow was like
then
then
terrific
MOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAR!
HAHA wat? XD
i liked it a lot
hahahahah so much win. Rainbow Dash
Rainbow Dash:
"Holy crap! Im flying!"
First words to be said by a human in Equestria that has learned how to fly
Buck Yeah
Damn I love this, my fav Oc x Dash story so far I must say. Cant wait for more.
58228
And that makes me feel good.
And Rainbow Troll is easily the funnest thing to write. It just... falls onto the page fully formed. I don't even have to think about it!
Oh Rainbow Dash! You are such a troll
Princess Celestia has some competition for the title of Equestria's Greatest Troll. Good work. 5 starred.
discord...mankini....BRAIN BLEACH AHHHHH
58925
That is how bad the original iteration of this chapter was. Thankfully I have banished it to the moon, and when it returns in a thousand years no-one will remember what it was a part of.
Oh man. This fic is hilarious. And so well written too!
Can't wait to see the next iteration!
59219
Hilarious? Well-written?
You're flattering me. I was just going for amusing, and I know my writing skills are for the most part barely par.
59301
Of course I'm flattering you. I've read tons and tons of fanfictions, so I like to think that I have a certain sense for quality. This is great, everything is well balanced and done in a humorous and interesting way. The only thing would be that your blatant dislike of Pinkie does shine through a bit :P
59989
If by "blatant dislike" you mean "extended absence", then I apologize. She just hasn't had to appear since that party.
Don't worry, she will be back.
61020
Nope, not really. I just got the feeling that you're not a fan of hers by the way you write her an her interactions and conversations. It's probably just me though, reading way too much into stuff as usual. It has no effect on the story or storytelling, so it might just be a misunderstanding of mine. Pinkie can't be an easy character to write no matter what.
61535
EXACTLY.
You need to get the balance right, and that kind of thing is bloody hard with a character like Pinkie. I'd like to think I've done a good job so far, but I just keep doubting myself.
She will return, though, I promise.
61991
Good to know that I'm not perfect all the time. Phew...
Anyhow yes, you've done an excellent job so far with everypony. Pinkie Pie is just... no matter what and now matter who writes her she comes across as the same pony. It's almost creepy, the way she's the same in so many ways in so many fics. Except in cupcakes, that wasn't Pinkie.
May I be so bold as to ask when we'll see the next installment? I know it's a silly question, and I don't expect you to answer it.
62018
Next update?
arch.413chan.net/PinkieShrug-%28n1317680687227%29.png
Honestly, between my full-time job and gratuitous gaming, its a miracle I get anything done.
63023
Ah well. I'm a patient guy.
Don't play too much Skyrim though. You might get an arrow to the knee.
ok this is some of the funniest use of dreams and ... that i have ever read... who thought you could use [you know] for comedy [i am not saying anything explicit because i think there may be younger kids reading this]
oh sweet jesus my brain, did you have to put THAT idea into the AN at the end?
OK this thing with the wing boners is just too hilarious HA HA HA!
