Shadows
The pony only known as “Kentwood” was once remembered stating that his baseball bats were “stronger than an alicorn’s horn”. Hoof-carved from the best chunks of Ash trees that could be salvaged from the Everfree Forest, and combined with precise craftponyship, no other wood implement could come close to their quality. Even so, that motto lives on in professional sports to this day, well over two hundred years since his death.
About ten years ago, the company was sold off to a foreign corporation that just wanted the name and trademark, and ran it into the ground. Ponies who had original Kentwood bats made sure to take care of them, keep them clean and used them professionally for their sport. Earlier ones were family heirlooms, passed down generation to generation, playing in the backyard, and possibly growing up to become a pro, like their grandfather.
Sometimes, however, an object’s intended use is lost. Instead, it finds a new purpose in life, and in the ponies who own it. Such is the tale of the resident Kentwood bat at Sunny Side’s Inn and Breakfast. This bat with the label half gone and the serial number long ago scratched out, found its calling late in life.
In the hooves of a changeling the bat was a weapon. It made contact with the head of a dark brown bull, named of all things ‘Jersey Shore’, looking for that triple or at worst in ground double. Hell-bent on ending the ‘ling’s life, with whatever means possible, Jersey made contact, although not with his intended target. The cracking sound heard throughout the bar echoed off the high ceiling, but thankfully the bat remained intact. The bull, not as much, as he was sent sprawling onto a table, collapsing the legs along with sending dirty plates and glasses to the floor crashing in symphony with the piano music.
Bob grinned at the downed figure, but quickly caught a hoof in the face from another bull. The bat was sent into the air, landing on the floor with a clatter of hardwood on hardwood. Somewhere, Kentwood was rolling in his grave.
An orange mare with a golden mane was the next pony up to bat, quickly swiping the implement off the floor. Applejack barely had any time to move when the tan bull in the group, Doc Holstein, charged. Thinking fast, she went for a bunt right as the bull rammed into her, his horns locking with the bat and skidding her all the way up to a wall, impaling her into the cheap plaster with cracking picture frames falling to the ground.
Holstein blew his breath at the mare, made rank with the lack of hygiene and stale beer. Applejack kicked her hind legs at his lower body, sending him off her, and using his momentum, begun to push him back with the bat. Before she could make any further moves, both bodies were sent to the ground by another fighting duo, a rainbow haired pegasus and a bull of white with black, (or black with white?) blotches that came tumbling in from the left and striking them both out.
----------
The door to the Mayor’s office swung open, allowing Twilight Sparkle, Rarity, Fluttershy, and Pinkie Pie to exit. From behind the mares followed Sunny Side, still sporting her work apron, the Sheriff, wearing his dusty blue police cap, and lastly Mayor Billfold. All was quiet, the only sounds being the clopping of their hooves. The floor didn’t creak even from Pinkie’s exuberant bouncing.
As they entered the post office, Swift Delivery was in the middle of sorting mail when he saw the group. Twilight went to say hello, but the skittish stallion ducked behind the counter, letters in his hooves drifting slowly to the counter top.
Twilight let out a sigh. She couldn’t blame the poor pony, but really, overreaction much?
“Swift! Stop being such a coward and stallion up!” Mayor said, then added, “Besides, it’s rude to hide from a princess… I think.”
The Sheriff let out a chuckle. “Easy there, Mayor. After what happened the other day, the poor guy needs to get himself back on track.”
Sunny shook her head. “I’ve had to come here to get my mail the last two days. He won’t even get near my Inn.”
“Because of us?” Twilight asked, then turned back to where the mail pony was hiding. The hat ontop of his head started to come into view as he rose up to chance a peak.
“S-s-s-sorry S-s-s-sunny! It’s j-j-just…”
Rarity cut him off. “Swift, darling, you don’t have to be afraid of us. We’re all sorry about what happened, Twilight especially so, I’m sure.”
Twilight nodded her head.
“Ah, yes, and we’re mostly to blame for it,” Mayor said, “and then we dragged you in on it as well. Apologies.”
By now the entirety of Swift’s head could be seen just over the counter, the stallion was shaking like a leaf.
“I-i-it’s f-f-fine, Mayor. I’m just so… r-r-rattled easy.” Swift had a downcast expression.
“Oh, I know how that is,” Fluttershy said, flapping her wings to join the stallion on the other side of the counter, giving him a pat on the back. “It’s okay, I’m easily scared too.”
Swift looked to the mare. “R-r-really?”
Fluttershy nodded. “Oh yes! Why, it’s been joked around that I’m even afraid of my own shadow.” All of Fluttershy’s friends found interesting aspects of the wood grains in the floor. “But I know they’re only joking, but the point is still the same.”
“T-t-then how do you g-g-get over it?”
Fluttershy looked back to her friends. “You can’t expect to get over every one of your fears, but your friends by your side, you don’t have anything to fear.”
Swift looked to his fellow townsponies, all three smiling at him.
“Well… I-I guess…”
The stallion stiffened suddenly; Fluttershy wrapped her forelegs in a tight hug around him. His shaking stopped, and a hot blush fell upon his face.
“It’s fine. Twilight and the rest of us are your friends too, so you have nothing to fear.”
The change in Swift Delivery’s mood was like a light switch. Instantly, he stopped shaking, relaxed his shoulders, and let out the breath he had been holding.
After a few seconds, Fluttershy let go, smiling at the stallion. He smiled back. “Thank you. I… uh… I’m not sure what else to say.”
“There’s nothing else to say, Swift. Fluttershy’s right,” Twilight said. “You have nothing to fear from us.”
The Sheriff added, “Besides, Bob is there, and Thomas most of the time too. You have nothing to worry about at Sunny’s.”
----------
The away team was now up to bat. Returning from the first inning, Jersey Shore was back on his hooves and ready to show the home team just who they were messing with. Grabbing the bat, his first swing was a strike, missing the rainbow maned pegasus by mere inches, her mane blowing from the movement. She turned around, this time ducking in time for strike two.
The third swing would make purchase, however she was quick enough to shield her head with her forelegs. The hit sent her rolling towards the bar, which now had a changeling being dragged down the polished surface by the white bull, Angus McSteer, his face smashing into each and every bottle and glass still standing.
A small victory at first turned into a fly ball as Jersey suddenly found himself meeting the rear hooves of Applejack, the bat quickly discarded in exchange for the ability to hold oneself while they screamed in pure agony from an Apple Family trademarked buck to the gut.
Having recovered at some point, Buffalo Bull, the black and white bull, kicked the bat away before Applejack could take it. With a snarl, Applejack went for another buck, but was blocked by a chair exploding into shrapnel against her side. Before she could see her new assailant, the second up to bat made contact with a solid single, launching the mare into the air to land behind the counter with a crash.
Buffalo Bull looked over to his companion, Holstein, and gave him a nod in thanks. With only one out, and three of the five bulls on their hooves, they mutually agreed to go after Rainbow Dash, who was just getting onto her own shaky hooves.
Before Buffalo Bull could swing, he found himself tackled into the bar, a firm palm grabbed the back of his head and began smashing his face into the glass covered bar top. Holstein went to aid his ally, however got tripped by Bob before he could swing. Thomas, after several slams, picked the bull’s face up from the bar and smashed one final beer bottle on his head, then dropped him. That was out number two, and with no movement from behind the bar the home team was still at a disadvantage.
Holstein was quick to recover from his trip, and before the changeling could pounce, he swung the bat at the human’s legs, taking him out quickly with a solid hit. Thomas slammed into a barstool crushing it instantly with a yelp of pain. The bull was up now, and went for another swing at the downed human.
His bat was caught mid-swing by Bob, both front hooves caught the bat, and now the momentum lost, Holstein lost grip and spun himself around. By the time he could recover, he looked forward to a grinning changeling, and that changeling swung the bat, making this out number three, and sending the bull hurling towards two lone bar patrons.
The poker players continued to play, oblivious to the chaos around them. Just before the bull collided with their table, the brown unicorn picked up the entire table, lifting it out of the way as the bull went right under and between their chairs. Once he hit the wall behind them, the unicorn set the table back down and laid out his hand.
“Full house,” he said, to the groan of his compatriot.
----------
As the group of ponies continued down the street, it was Rarity that noticed Thomas’ carriage first.
“Oh, I do believe they are already back.”
“Well, it’s about a half hour drive out there for him, and they’ve been gone a few hours now.” The sheriff tilted his head in thought, “and considerin’ what only Celestia knows Short Circuit did this time, they actually made good time.”
“What could he do?” Twilight asked.
Sheriff, Mayor, and Sunny all stopped in their tracks, looking at one another.
Sunny coughed into her hoof.
“It’s best you didn’t know.”
Twilight gave the sheriff a look, but he brushed it off.
“It’s never anything Thomas can’t handle, anyway. He seems to be the only person that can get through to that nut- I mean, pony.”
“And why is that?”
The Sheriff looked to Twilight, then grinned. “Thomas has a way with words.”
----------
Next inning, and the rosters still the same. Next up to bat for the home team was Applejack, who made a killer out in that last inning to tie the game up. Amongst the still conscious, it was now an even two on two. Angus on the opposing team walked towards the mare, a tad shaky, but determined nonetheless.
Applejack swung the bat, making contact with Angus on his shins, bringing him down to his knees. She then reared up, and gave a solid buck to his chest, sending him skidding along the floor into the back wall near the piano playing pony, who didn’t even flinch as he continued on with another song.
Last she’d seen Rainbow, she had been dragged along the length of the bar top by the black and white bull, not far behind when Bob got the same treatment. Didn’t these bulls know better than to hurt such a pretty face?
Applejack shuddered, wondering where that thought came from, and if she was spending too much time around Rarity again. She didn’t get to think long, for to her right she saw Thomas struggling with one of the few remaining bulls, Jersey Shore.
“Tom!”
Thomas turned to the mare, just in time to see a baseball bat come flying at him. He quickly caught it, and with a mighty swing, smacked the bull good across the face, sending him towards the bar. One of his teeth went flying at the two remaining poker playing ponies, the black earth pony raising a gloved hoof to catch the tooth, not bothering to look up from his cards in the other hoof.
The bull landed on one of the still standing stools, his elbows on the counter as his eyes spun. Bob, having finally recovered, stood from behind the counter, taking a single sip of whiskey from the bottle before smashing it down on the bull’s head, officially taking him out for the count.
All that remained now was Buffalo Bull, Holstein, and Longhorn himself, who had finally recovered from the initial surprise attack. Once his eyes met with Thomas, they turned red, his nostrils blowing smoke and his ears steam as he kicked back on the floor, sending dust and pieces of ceramic flying.
“Uh oh.” Applejack muttered, and then Longhorn charged.
----------
The closer they got to Sunny’s, they noticed they heard piano music playing.
“Oh, are they having a party in there?” Pinkie asked, “I didn’t know you had a piano!”
“It’s on the back wall. Usually we keep it covered with a cloth, but yeah we pull it out for special occasions.”
“Or if Windslor gets spunky and takes a break from his poker game,” the Sheriff said.
“Yeah, but that doesn’t happen often. Usually when-” Sunny stopped, her eyes going wide.
“When what?” Rarity asked.
The group stopped beside Thomas’ vehicle, near the base of the steps. There was a loud commotion coming from inside, the piano playing barely able to drown it out from the inside.
“Oh hey, I see Thomas almost has the window done,” the Mayor said, blissfully unaware of the commotion inside.
The Sheriff, however, knew well enough to start pushing the group of mares back the way they came.
“Actually, you know what I have some other things to share with you gals back in my office, about Thomas, that I’m sure you’d love to see.” The Sheriff continued to try and herd the mares, but Twilight broke away.
“We can do that later. Right now I wish to talk some more with Thomas.”
Twilight got more than she bargained for.
All the ponies jumped back, when from the only half-installed window exploded outwards, two figures crashing onto the balcony, then through the railing and landing in a heap on the ground. The grey bull moaned, clutching his head. Thomas was quick to his feet, although unsteady, then swiftly gave a good kick to the bull’s gut, causing him to lurch and curl into a ball.
Thomas spat at the bull, then with a limp went up the stairs and wandered back into Sunny’s. All the ponies were quiet, only the sheriff was moving, holding a hoof to his forehead as he shook his head.
Rarity looked to the Sheriff. “You’re right, he does have a way with words.”
----------
The first pony to brave entering Sunny Side’s was Sheriff Copper Top. Knowing well what to expect, he volunteered to judge the carnage and give back a report to the rest. The stallion was long-hardened from his years sheriffing the town of Oasis and putting up with Thomas’ shenanigans.
So the sight of four bulls hogtied in the center of the room, surrounded by destroyed furniture didn’t phase him. Windslor was still at the piano, playing another song that set a calming mood. Thomas was sitting on the floor, leaning against the bar with a mare on either side of him.
Copper Top trotted over to the three bodies against the bar. “Well, what am I gonna tell Sunny?”
“They started it,” Thomas said, reaching above his head for a half-filled low ball glass that was still intact.
“You threw the first punch though,” Rainbow Dash added.
“Yeah, well, they were ugly.” Thomas took a drink.
“Doesn’t mean you have ta go startin’ a bar brawl, especially in Sunny’s,” Copper Top took off his hat, wiping his brow.
He looked over to the four bulls, still knocked out cold.
“Where’s Bob?”
A black hoof stuck up from behind the bar with a little wave, then slowly lowered back down.
“Uhuh. Right.” Copper Top sighed, then turned back to report the damage outside.
Before he could, however, Sunny Side stood in the doorway, her expression harder than any liquor behind the bar. Mayor Billfold stood to her left, and Princess Twilight to her right. Fluttershy, Rarity, and Pinkie Pie all looked through the once again shattered window.
“Wowie, we sure missed quite the party,” Pinkie said.
“Pinkie, darling, now’s not the time,” Rarity looked on in horror.
“Well duh, Rarity. But just look at the place! It’s totally trashed!”
“Pinkie…” Rarity said through her teeth.
Sunny’s right eye twitched.
“It’s like they purposely went around and broke every chair, every table, and every bottle of rum they could!”
“Um, Pinkie Pie, please stop,” Fluttershy pleaded.
Sunny Side took a slow step forward, her eyes focused on the three figures against the bar. Applejack, on Thomas’ right, looked on in silent terror at the expression on the Inn pony’s face. Rainbow tried her best to hide behind Thomas’ bulking figure, but with not much luck other than her face.
Copper Top took a couple steps back, allowing the mare to take his place and stand before the three responsible.
Thomas held up his hands in defense, “Okay, I know what you might be thinking Sunny, but it wasn’t-”
In a blur of motion, Sunny reached down on the ground with a hoof and grabbed the discarded baseball bat and swung it at Thomas’ head. It made contact with a crack, the bat being the least hurt, and sending Thomas reeling and tumbling out the doors and landing outside, face first in the dirt at the bottom of the steps.
Applejack and Rainbow watched in horror, then turned slowly at the fuming mare. Sunny straightened out her apron and hoofed over the bat to Sheriff Copper Top.
“Now, I know none of this here was your faults,” Sunny said, giving both mares a smile, her teeth grinding.
“Well, you see Miss Sunny-” Applejack tried to say, but was stopped by Sunny raising a hoof.
“Now darlin’, I know well enough to understand what probably happened here. But frankly, I don’t care. My diner is destroyed, and the only person with the skill and time to fix it is the one who did the destruction in the first place.”
“Well, at least he did something about it,” Rainbow said.
Sunny gave Dash a look, brow raised. “So now you’re defending him? Earlier you hated his guts. He impress your young heart or somethin’?”
Rainbow looked away from Sunny. “N-no, it’s just not many ponies, or people, would stand up to something like that. Especially five on one.”
“No, two on one.” Sunny picked up a broken chair leg. “Bob. Get yer ass out here.”
From behind the counter, crawled the changeling, his head downcast and ears flat. He stopped in front of his wife, his belly touching the debris covered floor.
“Bobby, honey, are you okay?”
Bob looked up for the first time, and with pleading eyes nodded his head.
“Good.”
----------
Thomas groaned, picking himself off the dirt road, brushing at his sleeves. He grabbed the side of his head, which was still pounding something fierce.
“Well, that went better than I thought it would.” Thomas looked to the still curled up Longhorn. “Although not as much for you, I’m to figure.”
Thomas looked back towards Sunny, just in time to be greeted by Bob’s forehead colliding with his own, sending them both back and landing on the downed bull.
Sunny Side marched out the door, her apron half dangling from her neck. Sheriff Copper Top stepped up beside her.
“Your call,” said the Sheriff.
“I want them both detained.”
Copper Top shrugged.
“And those bulls. In fact, put them in the same cell. Make them all suffer, and maybe they’ll pound some sense into those two idiots.”
“Whatever you say, Sunny.”
Copper Top stepped down the stairs, approaching the three downed figures as Twilight and her friends, including the two bruised mares, all joined Sunny.
“Sunny, do you think that’s so wise?” Twilight asked.
“Yes, while I’m sure they deserve it, that’s a bit far. Same cell? What if they get into it again?” Rarity asked.
“Maybe then it will teach them to act their age.” Sunny looked to Twilight. “They ain’t no spring chickens anymore. One of these days, those two idiots are going to actually get badly hurt,” Sunny turned away to enter her Inn, but Twilight saw the traces of tears down the mare’s cheeks, “or worse.”
“What about us?” Rainbow asked, then was shoved by Applejack. “What? I’m just asking, we were in the fight too.”
Sunny sighed. “Yes, but you two didn’t know any better.”
“What’s that suppose to mean?” Rainbow took a step towards Sunny.
“I’m sayin’ you’re both dumb and young,” Sunny smiled, “but that’s okay, you can afford to. Those two can’t anymore. Now, if you do want to make some amends, you could drag those four you tied up and take them to jail with the other three.”
Sunny entered through the double doors at the same time Mayor Billfold exited.
“I’m so sorry, Sunny. It’s just so unlike Thomas to-”
“Oh you can cut the crap already, Bill.” Sunny looked back to the six mares. “By now they get the picture. Thomas ain’t no saint.”
Billfold sighed. “Yes… I was afraid of that.”
Sunny continued inside, as piano music picked up.
“Windslor, I swear by my hooves if you play another note, I’ll make you like this window!”
The piano music from inside was abruptly silenced. The six mares all shared looks as they watched the sheriff escort Thomas and Bob, the two dragging along the knocked out Longhorn.
“Now what?” Pinkie asked.
Applejack sighed, and with a nudge at Rainbow’s shoulder the two marched inside Sunny’s, intent on doing as the mare had asked of them.
----------
“You’re lucky you just dislocated your shoulder, Tom. I’m more amazed you didn’t get a concussion from the blows you took to your head.” Doc Hollywood placed his flashlight back into his breast pocket with his mouth.
Thomas sat upright in the single cell, against the West wall, where Bob already had another set of bandages on his head.
“Yeah, well that’s how it goes sometimes.” Thomas helped himself into a sling with his left arm, wincing as he moved wrong.
“Yes, yes, but one of these days you’re gonna get more seriously hurt. You should really start thinking before you act, Tom.”
“Please, I get enough lectures from the Mayor and Sheriff. I don’t need another dad in this town.”
Hollywood shook his head. “Well, just be thankful that most of those bulls giving you death glares aren’t in any better shape, or I’d hesitate to leave you seven alone together.”
“Ain’t nothing me and Bob couldn’t handle, right?” Thomas looked to his friend.
Bob gave Thomas a glare.
“Okay, geeze Bob, you don’t gotta be so testy.”
“Well, I think that’s about the extent of my service for you lot. Get lots of rest, and don’t get into any other fights for at least another forty eight hours.”
Doc Hollywood packed up his medical bag, placed his hat on his head with a tip to both parties, then departed the cell. Copper Top gave the gate a strong slam, ensuring it locked.
“Play nice.” Copper Top followed the doctor out of the jailhouse.
All was quiet for five minutes, with each party giving the other passive aggressive glares from across the cell.
“So, you guys put up a pretty good fight,” Thomas said.
Longhorn blew steam out his nose.
Thomas chuckled. “I’m serious, I wasn’t sure if we could actually take you guys on with just me and Bob. At least Rainbow Dash and Appleack helped.
At the mare’s names, Longhorn stood, not without nearly falling over, and huffed.
“Yeah, well you’re lucky we didn’t go all out on you.”
“All out? Please.” Thomas waved his left hand. “You heard Doc, I’m no youngster anymore, and if I’m allowed to judge, neither are you guys. That back there was our all.”
Longhorn huffed again, taking a step, only to be stopped by Jersey Shore.
“Boss, there’s no sense in hurting yourself more.”
“I just want to wipe that smug grin off that pale face of his.”
Thomas laughed, but stopped himself as pain struck his chest. “Oh no, you misinterpret. This isn’t a smug grin.”
“What is it suppose to be, then?”
“Just remembering the first time I got put in jail after a bar fight. I was probably, oh, eighteen. Did the same thing here, dislocated my right shoulder. Figures, it was the reason I lost my baseball scholarship.” Thomas shook his head, still smiling.
The bulls were all silent, Longhorn finally settling down and taking his seat on the only bed in the cell.
It was quiet again for several long minutes.
Thomas shifted his legs, groaning from the effort. “Oh come on now, surely you guys don’t expect this to be more than just a bar fight.”
“Of course we do!” Longhorn said. “You were with them.”
“Who? Those mares? Technically, they were with me. Forced on me, more like it.”
“How so?” Buffalo Bull asked.
“Apparently they’re here to, well, investigate me.”
“Pfft,” Holstein huffed, “investigate what?”
“Certainly not my anatomy, that’s for sure.”
At that, the four bulls around Lockhorn gave out small quips of laughter, two of them wincing in pain as they did so.
“Eh, at least you can laugh about it.” Thomas leaned back against the brick wall. “I gotta deal with them all over me, watching what I do and questioning me about why.”
“They were pretty troublesome for us too, back when we first met them,” Holstein said.
“We were also trying to steal property from the orange mare’s family,” Angus added.
“Oh yeah, that would do it then,” Thomas shook his head. “And I’m gonna go out on a limb here and say it never got rightfully resolved.”
“No.” Lockhorn snorted. “No it didn’t.”
Thomas shrugged, wincing at his right shoulder. “Well, sometimes we gotta treat life like poker. Know when to hold them, when to fold them, when to walk away, or when to run.”
Lockhorn tilted his head.
“It’s an old song I remember. Don’t mind, just as I’ve gotten older, I’ve taken those words more to heart.”
“And yet you threw the first punch,” Lockhorn said.
“Wouldn’t you have? If roles were reversed?”
Lockhorn opened his mouth, but didn’t speak, and closed his jaw.
“Exactly. Don’t take any of it personal, just sometimes that’s how it goes. Some days, you’re the hydrant. Some days, you’re the dog.”
“You know, you’re not as full of shit as I thought you’d be.”
“Oh no, trust me, I’m plenty full of shit.”
For the first time, Lockhorn gave a chuckle. Thomas joined in.
----------
The next day was slow. Twilight and her friends helped Sunny Side pick up the pieces of her diner, salvaging as many chairs, tables, and bar stools as they could. There were still several that could not be saved, even with Twilight’s magical abilities. What was left would be up to Thomas the carpenter to fix, or more likely rebuild.
Speaking of, the group of mares followed behind Copper Top as they approached the jail house.
“I wonder if he’s still alive?” Applejack asked.
“Of course he is. He’s tough.” Rainbow said, taking to the air and rubbing her chest with a breath and hoof.
“Golly R-D, you really have taken quite the fancy to ‘Old Tom’.” Applejack winked.
“W-what? No I haven’t. He can hold himself in a fight, and kick flank. So what?”
‘Uhuh, sure thing sugarcube.” Applejack laughed.
“It’s not like that…” Rainbow whispered, only loud enough for Fluttershy and Rarity to share a glance.
As the jailhouse drew closer, they heard a commotion coming from inside. Copper Top stopped in front of his door, shaking his head.
“What’s the matter, Sheriff?” Twilight asked. “Is something going on inside?”
“Oh yeah, there sure is.” Copper Top opened the door, allowing Twilight and her friends enterance first.
“So Will, you see, was still drunk as a skunk, and when the cop finally got to questioning him, Will opened his mouth to speak and instead just puked all over the cop’s pants and shoes.”
At that all five bulls, Bob the changeling, and Thomas burst into laughter.
Twilight and her friends all stood there, slack-jawed at what they were witnessing.
“Eeyup. Tom sure did it alright. Punched first, got his ass kicked, and still made the bad guys into his friends.” Copper Top shook his head. “I sure wish I had a hundred bits for every time this happened. Then I could retire early.”
Ignoring the new ponies in the room, Thomas continued. “So, somehow by the grace of God, Me and my brothers play it cool like we didn’t know what was wrong with him. Yeah, no the cop had none of that and arrested all of us. The problem, however, was he already had two guys in his squad car for the same shit. I swear, this cop was still a rookie, and didn’t know how to deal with the problem, so what does he do?
“He asks us to get back in our car, and whoever’s the most sober to follow him back to the precinct for detention.”
Again, the seven inmates burst into laughter.
“I swear, if it had been anyone other than Richard, we would have lost that cop. But that damned brother of mine just had to be the ‘good guy’ and actually follow that cop all the way to the station.”
The laughter settled down, and after a moment Bob took notice of the six mares and Sheriff staring at them. He nudged Tom’s good shoulder, and he looked over.
“Oh, howdy there Sheriff. Afternoon ladies. Is it time to go?”
Sheriff Copper Top unlocked and opened the cell door. “For you two, yes. The rest of them are gonna be in longer for the attempted robbery.”
Thomas and Bob exited the cell, and before the door could close Thomas grabbed it with his hand.
“What robbery?”
The six mares, five bulls, and one sheriff blinked in unison, looking at the tall bipedal.
“Say what?” Copper Top asked.
“Bob, did they try to rob the place?”
Bob let out a long sigh, then shook his head.
“It was just a simple bar fight, nothing else.”
“WHAT?” Rainbow shouted. “Yes it was, they were totally ready to rob the place! They had masks on and everything!”
“I dunno, Sheriff, did you see any handkerchiefs when you cleaned up?”
Sheriff Copper Top tapped his chin in thought. “No, I didn’t see any. Ladies, you helped clean, did you?”
At once all six mares began to speak, but then went quiet.
“Well, they were wearing them when they first came in!” Applejack said.
“Hm, no, I don’t remember that. Me and Longhorn here had a simple disagreement, and one thing led to another, and I punched him.” Thomas looked at the gray bull, still staring at him in shock. “Right, Longhorn?”
Longhorn shook the daze from his eyes, and then nodded. “Yeah, that’s it. Just a simple bar fight.”
Rainbow opened her mouth to protest further, but at the look of Thomas’ face, she quieted up. The motion was not unnoticed by Applejack, so instead she took over the argument. “Them bulls came in ready to start something, and sure Tom threw the first punch, but it was because of them.”
Thomas cleared his throat. “Well, considering that Bob is married to the owner of the establishment, there for co-owner. And he was there to witness it, I think it’s for him to decide.”
Everyone in the jailhouse looked to the changeling, who nonplussed shook his head.
“Well, that settles it then. Come on out you five.”
“WHAT!?” Five of the mares shouted. Rainbow continued to give Thomas a disapproving look.
Slowly, each bull stepped out of the cell. “Old Tom’s right, ladies. Bob has the say in this, since he was there and is technically an owner. He says they didn’t rob it, then they didn’t rob it.”
“That’s a total crock of-” Applejack started.
Twilight magically zipped Applejack’s lips. “Sheriff Copper Top, you cannot expect that to hold up in court.”
“What court?” Copper Top asked. “There’s nothing to go to court with. Sunny already said Tom had to fix the furniture, window, and walls they all destroyed. Bob said they didn’t rob it. To me, it’s all settled then.
“Besides, Sunny said it was Bob’s call.”
Twilight froze. “W-what?”
Copper Top shrugged. “Sunny said it was Bob’s call. He was there, and he would know what happened and how to handle it. So if Bob says it was just a bar fight, it was just a bar fight.”
“What a load of horseapples...” Rainbow whispered under her breath.
Thomas stepped up beside the pegasus, patting her head. “It’s okay, you did fight good though. Thanks for the-”
Rainbow swatted his hand away forcefully, then finally breaking her silence she said, “Don’t give me any thanks, you’re letting these bad guys go! We know what they’re really like, and what they’ve done. We know-”
“I know, that they served their time for those past mistakes,” Thomas looked to the bulls, “right?”
All five nodded.
“So there you have it. End of story. I gotta get going, I have lots of work to do.” Thomas made for the door, but stopped to look back again. “Longhorn, Holstein, Jersey Shore, Bull, Angus, it was fun.”
All five bulls nodded, then retrieved their hats. “Likewise, we have somewhere to be too. We got a long trip ahead of us.” Longhorn said.
“Good. Just remember what I told you guys.” Thomas saluted, then walked out with Bob close behind.
The bulls walked out as well, passing the mares with a tip of their hats. Twilight noticed the most unnerving thing was they actually looked… happy. There were the slight traces of smiles on their muzzles. Not how she remembered them acting to her before.
As the last bull exited the jailhouse, Sheriff Copper Top let out a sigh. “Every damn time. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again. Tom should have been the town sheriff, not me.” Copper Top placed his hat on the rack.
“So that’s it then? You’re just gonna let them go?” Rarity asked.
“Eeyup. That’s it.”
Applejack finally unzipped her mouth. “Twilight, you gotta have some sort of authority to detain them vagrants longer, right?” Applejack asked.
“Sadly, I wasn’t there Applejack. I believe you, trust me I do, but what Copper Top said was fairly correct. If the owners aren’t going to press charges, then there is nothing we can do.” Twilight sighed. “I just don’t understand why.” Twilight looked out the window, seeing the five bulls on their goats stampeding out of town. “Why did Thomas and Bob just let them go?”
“Princess,” Copper Top spun in his chair to face the mares, “Old Tom is a strange duck. He does things when you least expect them, and they have the strangest of outcomes. I guarantee you one thing, Tom’s first stop is Swift to send out a telegram to someone, somewhere in Equestria, that they now have five new workers on their way.”
“Huh?” Twilight looked back to the sheriff. “What does that mean?”
“Tom has a way to get on bad guys levels. He gets them, understands that sometimes, they just need a second chance, or third, or fourth.”
“So he just lets them go?”
“That’s a simple way to put it. He puts them in another place, where they end up using the time they’d be in jail, to instead build a new life.”
“Oh sure, and you know this how?” Rainbow said, rolling her eyes.
Copper Top looked at his desk a moment, then pulled open the top center drawer and began sifting through the mess.
“Because, once upon a time, a young, foolish stallion tried to rob this town.” Copper Top starred at the group of mares.“Well, he got caught easily enough by a creature he’d never seen before, and his name was Thomas Baker. So, one thing lead to another, and the two got into a fight in the bank. Messed up the place real good.
“So, when all was said and done, both found themselves in that very same jail cell behind me. At first that stallion wanted nothing more than to kick that human’s flank for catching him, but then something strange happened. He started to complain about his right shoulder, from his first bar fight, and soon the two were talking and laughing about past mistakes. Soon enough, the twenty four hours were up for Thomas, and just before that door could close on the stallion, he grabbed the gate.
“He told some bullshit story about how, apparently, that stallion thought the bank was still open and wanted to deposit a bit, and how Thomas had just so happened to be working on some flooring. One thing lead to another, and inadvertently the two had destroyed half the bank lobby and sent bit coins everywhere. At first everyone called horseapples, even the stallion soon to be on trial.
“Yet, to humor the human, they counted the bits. Sure enough, there was one extra coin, but not a bit. And, more so, no handkerchief worn by the culprit. So, charges were dropped, and the stallion was let go.”
“So then what?” Fluttershy asked.
Pinkie nodded. “Yeah, what happened to the stallion?”
Twilight stood still, her mind running a mile a minute as the pieces started to form.
Finally finding what he was looking for, Copper Top pulled out an old, worn handkerchief, heavily frayed on the edges, and laid it on the desk top.
“Thomas put in a good word for the stallion, and soon enough he got a job. That one bit in the bank got him started on a new life, and soon he was able to bring over his ill wife and young son to live with him in his new hometown. Now that older, still a bit dumb, stallion is the sheriff of the very same town.”
Twilight and her friends all looked at the handkerchief, and in the middle sat a single gold coin, but not a bit. Much thinner, and with a face other than Celestia’s on it, the words clearly on it “In God We Trust.”
----------
The six mares exited the jail house several minutes later, all in varying states of distress. Half of them found what Thomas had done to be noble, but left a bad taste in their mouths. The other half thought the entire thing was wrong and wanted to kick the human’s flank, or butt, whatever he called his posterior.
The only thing that could properly be decided on was that they all needed to do some serious thinking about the events surrounding Thomas. So, as they walked back towards Sunny Side’s, they talked.
“I’m starting to think simply giving a yay or neigh from each of us isn’t going to cut it,” Twilight said, the first to speak.
“Why? I still feel it appropriate,” Rarity said.
“It just feels like, every time we think we get a grasp on him, he goes and does something out of nowhere that changes our perception of him,” Twilight said.
“Speak for yourself, darling. My opinions of him have not changed.”
“Even with what he’s done for the townsponies?” Fluttershy asked.
Rarity hesitated a moment. “I will admit, I thought about it most of the night, but yes. I still say neigh. Especially after yesterday’s incident at the Inn. So barbaric.”
“Well I’m still yay.” Fluttershy stomped a forehoof with a bit more force.
“Okay, well what about you Applejack?”
Applejack was quiet, chewing on her lower lip, deep in thought.
“Well, I know what my answer is,” Rainbow spoke up.
“Very well, since Applejack seems to still be mulling it over, what’s your answer Dash?”
“It’s a total yay from me.”
At Rainbows words, her five friends stopped in their tracks.
“Say that again, darling?”
Rainbow turned around, landing and tucking her wings away. “I said yay.”
“Wow, honestly Rainbow, I didn’t think you would,” Twilight said.
“Why?”
“Well, we all know you were smitten with his fighting-”
“Would you cut that out, Rarity? Yeesh,” Rainbow cut off.
Rarity continued, “-But after the incident at the jail house, I thought you’d surely change your mind.”
“I have’ta agree with Rares there, Dash. I didn’t think you’d change your mind,” Applejack finally spoke.
“I honestly didn’t think you’d even changed your mind from the previous night, when Rarity and Fluttershy shared their thoughts,” Twilight said.
Rainbow shrugged. “His stupid decision-making aside, I could tell he really cares about this town. I know I’ve gotten into fights over lesser things, but not by much. I figured at first he was just a jerk and didn’t care about anypony. Then, the guy goes and tries to take on five bulls on his own. I know he had Bob there for support, but I think he didn’t think me or AJ were gonna step in to help.”
Rainbow took back to the sky to hover over her friends. “The way I see it, if he has the attitude to wanna take on a fight like that, then I’m sure he’s got it in him to wanna take care of the town he calls home. So, I say yay.”
The five other mares just stared on at Dash, Fluttershy smiling up at her closest friend as she spoke.
“Wow, Dash. That was a bit more insightful than I expected from you,” Twilight blurted.
Rainbow rose a brow. “Really, Twi? You didn’t think I’d actually try with this?”
“Well, I wouldn’t say not try, just that…” Twilight rolled her hoof in the air.
“I think Twi’s just sayin’ that you put more thought into the why of the fight, instead of the aftermath, and it caught ‘er by surprise.”
“Yes, thank you Applejack,” Twilight said, while nodding.
“Oh, well then yeah, I guess so,” Rainbow said. “So what about you then, A-J?”
Applejack let out a sigh. “As much as I wanna agree with Dash, because honestly I do, I just can’t see lettin’ known criminals like that go.”
“For the record, he didn’t really know about our past with them, so you can’t factor that into the equation,” Twilight said.
“But he was there, hay he knew they were trying to rob the place. Past incidents don’t mean nothin’, it was about the then and there. I don’t care what the Sheriff says, or thinks either. Nor does it matter our past. He shouldn’t be so willing to forgive and forget somethin’ like that.”
“But Applejack, isn’t that against what we are here for?” Fluttershy asked.
Applejack rose a brow. “I don’t follow ya.”
“How often is it that we give ponies a second chance? Look at Trixie, for example.”
At the sound of her name, Trixie Lulamoon chose that moment to dump a trash can into a nearby dumpster, making enough loud noise to draw the attention of all six mares standing in the road.
Trixie looked on. “What? Trixie heard her name, therefore she can eavesdrop all she wants.”
Twilight rolled her eyes. “Go on Fluttershy.”
Fluttershy nodded. “Right. Trixie was given another chance after the magic duel, and now look at her.”
Again, the six mares all turned to look at the magician, wearing a hairnet and a stained, dirty apron, leaning against a dirty trash can with flies buzzing around her. With a quick puff of magic, a flyswatter materialized and swatted at one.
“Well, um, she’s changed her ways, hasn’t she?” Fluttershy asked.
“You do have a point, Fluttershy. I will give you that,” Rarity said, choosing to stand on the other side of the group, giving distance between the smelly garbage and herself.
“Thomas is trying to give those bulls another shot. Maybe this will be the one they needed. You heard the Sheriff, he’s probably gone over right now and made a telegram to somepony he knows.”
----------
Thomas slammed his empty glass on the counter. “Hey Bob, once you’re done fondling your wife in the kitchen, pour me another shot will ya?”
----------
“If the townsponies can put enough trust into Thomas and have faith in his decisions, then so do I.”
Applejack let out another sigh. “I guess you’re right, ‘Shy.”
“Hah!”
Again, the six mares all turned to Trixie at her outburst.
“Um, do you have something you’d like to add, uh, Trixie?” Fluttershy asked.
“You seriously think what that bone head does is for the benefit of the town? Or anyone for that matter? As if. He doesn’t care about nopony or nothing. He just wants ponies to think that, so that he can get away with being a jerk.”
“Do you really hate him that much, Trixie?” Twilight asked.
“Yes, yes Trixie does.”
“But why? What did he do to you?”
“Trixie has her reasons, she doesn’t need to share them with princesses who think they know everything, but clearly dont.”
Twilight let out a sigh. “Fine, have it your way.”
“Trixie shall." With a nod, Trixie took the trash can in her magic and began to walk back into Sunny’s, but paused a moment. “Although, if you really want the proof of his foolishness, you’ll find it upstairs in his shop,” and with that, Trixie returned through the service door on the side of Sunny’s.
“That was, oddly helpful,” Rarity said.
Rainbow rolled her eyes, turning back to her friends, “So, now what?”
Twilight magicked a scroll in front of her. “Well, from how I figure it, we got three days still before we have to head back to Ponyville. Tomorrow, it will be Pinkie and my turn to engage with Thomas. Then that should leave us with two days to discuss, compile our notes and findings, and ultimately decide if he gets the medal.”
“Don’t forget about my money.”
Everypony looked to Thomas as he came down Sunny Side’s steps. Approaching the open backdoors on his van, he threw broken remnants of furniture inside with his good arm.
“I thought you didn’t want anything from us?” Rainbow asked, flying over to the human.
“No, I said I didn’t want no stinking medal. The bits would be nice, though. Help get me out of the tight spot I’ve put myself in trying to fix things up.”
“And yet you go and bust up a Inn’s dining room?”
Thomas shrugged. “Hey, you can’t make an omelet without breaking a few eggs.”
Twilight’s right eye twitched. “That has nothing to do with broken furniture.”
“But it is what I had for lunch. Also I’ll have this stuff fixed in no time, so no worries.”
“You do know that half of the furniture inside was fixed by Twilight, right?” Rarity asked.
“Yeah, Sunny said something about that. I still gotta go over some of them though. While your magic is nice, it’s not really suited for carpentry.”
A few strands of hair stood out in Twilight’s mane.
“Uh, well I think it’s best time we returned to what we were doing, right girls?” Applejack asked, trying to draw Twilight away.
All the mares nodded their heads, regrouping and walking away.
Thomas threw some more chair parts into his van. “Wasn’t the only reason you’re here to watch me? So, technically you don’t have anything else to be doing?”
Rainbow dragged her hooves down her face with a moan. “Way to be a buzzkill.”
“Well, there’s still plenty of day left. You last two can come watch me work for a bit, comment and question everything I say and do, then regroup later and talk about me behind my back.”
Rarity eyed the human skeptically. “This is part of the ‘getting us out of your hair quicker’ goal, isn’t it?”
“Oh yeah.” Thomas closed the van doors “Lucky guess.”
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Why is it not that surprising that Applejack is holding that much of a grudge even in the face of logic?
I love this story. It's got everything a reader needs to avoid work/school/dates/alimony payments/zombie apocalypse/kid's first concert/marriages/funerals/the birth of your first born/prom/seeing your parole officer/anything else I might have missed.
I await the next chapter! I burn a candle while I wait! I got a really, really, really long one this time!
I don't need a reason to yell at you!!
Finally
Year or not from the last update, that was a good read.
Its alive!
Kind of depressing to see how reluctant they are to accept him.
SO many good things happening in this story. I Can't even begin to praise them. This makes for an awesome read, the characters are realer than life and I love it.
Doesn't quite fit as a "song" has vocalists, I suggest you replace that with another word, perhaps "piece"?
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
8154099 Also, great chapter! Loved the baseball thing you had going!
Btw the second song doesnt work, video is unavailable
"then they"?
Ahh, this was a very welcome surprise.
8154102
I'm happy a chapter was uploaded too, this story gives off a very nice real feel.... Not to mention the main character is so radically different from the usual main characters that it creates a nice clash that invites a lot of what ifs into the mind.
Man, I forgot about this fic. Thanks for updating and reminding me how awesome it is. I loved this chapter. So full of great moments.
These ponies are a bit unforgiving, considering one of their own attempted to kill all livings things with an eternal night, or forcibly brainwashed an entire town to fight for a doll in a battle royale, and not to mention threatened the world by releasing the spirit of Chaos from his imprisonment to try to reform him.
Oh but let's not let a group of attempted robbers get away even though no one's pressing charges and they seem to have been set on a better path and have a chance of reforming themselves rather than being forced to do so from an outside source. Can't have that kind of self-determination anywhere around magical destiny land, no! Once a criminal always a criminal and don't you forget it!
Le sigh
Anyay, author, trust me, you're not the only one who's taking a dog's age to write something.
What puzzles me is WHY THE FUCK are they having an investigation into whether he's "evil" or whatever they're doing instead of awarding him the medal like they came there to do?
8154336 They're investigating to see if he's eligible for the pony civilian version of the Medal of Honor...or Nobel Peace Prize.
Hey, at least you didn't take as long as me! Great chapters, dude!
Very nice! That was an excellent chapter.
The part with Dvorak's Humoresque in saloon style alone was awesome.
And how you turned the relationship to those bulls around in the jail-cell was surprising and intelligent.
I can't wait to see how you're going to finish this. Thank you for still writing it :)
i have a feeling that twilight is gonna be a yay and pinkie is gonna see something to make her say nay, just a hunch
So when is he just gonna tell them to fuck off?
Discord, Luna, and Trixie were all forgiven for their actions, and they did worse.
So y'all shut up!
Ah, always refreshing to read this story.
Also, great baseball references.
Though I am still a bit confused about something.... Tom is being recomended for the medal due to his efforts after Tirek escaped right? So why are they worrying about his character before or afterwards? Even if they come to the unanimous conclusion that he's a jerk, it still wouldn't change the help he gave the town.
Sometimes, these ponies need some sense beaten into them, literally.
This story is very refreshing, the Human doesn't have magical powers, he/she hasn't already had a romantic relationship with a pony, no harems, nobody's died (From what we've seen), and the Human isn't intent on killing anyone. He's more or less, average but is no pushover either.
I wish I could give more likes.
8154655 didn't she try to destroy/sabotage the weather factory for all of equestria
(something about her pet turtle hibernating?)
8155109 I'm pretty certain that's post-Tirek. But if we are counting what they WILL do, then that was essentially terrorism and/or industrial sabotage.
8155199
It was industrial sabotage. You can't count it as terrorism if it had no political or religious motivation.
Well, that certainly didn't turn out the way I expected. But at the same time I'm not surprised at all.
Poor Twilight though, she'll get an aneurysm from the overload her brain is going through by not being able to figure out what to think
So... who will try to sneak into Tom's room upstairs and inevitably get caught?
8154755 he/she hasn't already had a romantic relationship with a pony.
I don't know. Rainbow really liked how he carried himself in that fight. Heh. RD X T !
Good thing they're in cartoon world. A bat swing to the head hard enough to send someone flying is usually pretty lethal, what with cranial fractures and swelling of the brain. Like how she's all crying and worried about them after doing something so dangerous.
These ponies will drive
meThomas and Bob to drinkMaybe they will call in a impartial observer to give their own opinions?
Wow this story has exactly 2222 likes
Had to re-read the last chapter to remember where I was at but worth the wait.
8154024 well, we will see if they go rob somewhere else who was right or wrong in this case.
Am so looking forward to Pinkie's turn. Hopefully, it won't take the better part of a year to do it.
8156403 And if they do, THEN you kill them and make burgers of their corpses to sell to the griffons for evil capitalist profits!
As a lesson to the rest!
I love this chapter. But I hate the long wait.
This story is on-par with The Tale of Lord Barleycorn as far as HIE fics go.
Yes that is high praise.
8154655 Assault and battery (dragonshy), the dragon was just trying to take a nap when the poor guy had to deal with a bunch of goons during a home invasion--oh, and add in accomplice to attempted robbery (Rarity--dragonshy).
Breaking and entering (Friendship is magic, pt 2) when she burst into Twilight's home to demand to know if she was a spy.
Stealing identities (Sonic Rainboom), at least 10 times in that episode when she switched other ponies' contestant numbers with her own.
Animal abuse (May the best pet win)--need we really to into detail with this one?
Reckless endangerment (The Mysterious Mare Do Well)
Can probably find a few more if I had more time...
Book'em, Spike!
Holy crap, it's aliiiiiiiiiive!
Hot damn, dude. Almost a year later and you've still got it absolutely solid. The bar fight was gold and the scene with the jail and Copper Tops story had me with a big, stupid smile plastered on my face. Great stuff.
Woot! Glad to see this story update!
Can't wait for more, since it is a great story line!
I really enjoyed how the bar fight played out, as it wasn't just the good guys kicking ass, but we got several hilarious mental pictures of, for instance, a bull dragging Rainbow Dash across a bar desk through numerous beer bottles.
Not sure impale is the perfect word here... unless she got a horn through her body... Pinning her against the cheap plaster is probably more correct.
8159941
I think "slamming her into the cheap plaster" would fit better, due to the high power/action of that part.
Pinning would need the 'taur to more or less stop and put her in a hold of sort. Doesn't flow quite as well.
great to see an other chapter again, hope the next chapter