Chapter 1 - Shortness
"There comes a day where you find a way to escape"
You know what I hate about being petrified in stone for over a millennium? Nothing at all. You know what I hate about being stuck next to a god of chaos? Everything. Especially when he wants to talk non-stop the most of the time. You should also know the fun fact that when you are petrified you usually are void of sorts and even then you are asleep unless you are forced to be awake for the whole time. Luckily for me Discord decided to keep me awake for every single second of it because he wanted someone to talk with, but honestly the second part is that I can now see, feel and hear everything that happens around me.
Now you maybe wondering what could possibly be worst than feeling every bird shit and the pain from annoying kids knocking me off my pedestal. The answer is Discord's bicentennial one week karaoke marathon. Do you know the definition of insanity? Because I do. It's called "The Song that Never Ends" and he sings it for a week.
Ooh looks like we have company O'buddy of mine! Now no more monologuing while the nice mare tells these foals of my wonderful chaos I don't want to miss a single bit.
Fine...
"I want to start our field trip here, in the world-famous Canterlot sculpture garden. That one over there represents friendship. All right, my little ponies, this one represents victory." a fuchsia mare said, a group of kids following behind.
blah, blah, blah, friendship this, harmony that, get onto me already.
Just shut up already Discord
"...Girls! Now this is a really interesting statue. What do you notice about it?" the mare said gesturing towards me.
"It's got a weird claws!" "It's got a spear!" "It's really short!"
ARE YOU KIDDING ME!? OF ALL THE THINGS YOU COULD PICK! I'M ALMOST AS TALL AS THE PRINCESSES!
Now, now Edward, language, they're foals after all
"This creature is called an Alchemist. It's body is similar to a minotaur, but has no hair on its body or horns and has an arm and leg made of metal. What do you suppose that represents?"
"Strangeness!" "Fighting!" "Shortness!"
REALLY!? SHORTNESS!? STRANGENESS I CAN UNDERSTAND BUT SERIOUSLY!?
"Actually this statue represents Equivalent Exchange, which means nothing can be achieved without something of equal value given in return." The school teacher explained.
Okay I'm actually sort of surprised, the princesses actually listened to me, when I was talking about alchemy.
"And right here is "Discord", which means a lack of harmony between ponies, and since you three have demonstrated discord for us so well you're each going to write me an essay explaining it." she said as the rest of the kids laughed at the three. "Now let's go, and I don't want anymore fighting."
WHAT!? No stories about my chessboard grass? No even a word about the chaos capital of the world I built by myself!?
Resounding cracks rang out from Discord's statue as the group had moved on towards more of the garden.
Oh is my time up already?
I watched as cracks formed across Discord's body before it shattered in a flash of light leaving the draconequus stretching his back "Oh its so great to be back!"
Discord you wouldn't leave your old pal behind would you?
He turned towards me "Oh I wouldn't dream of it." he said conjuring a chisel and hammer from thin air before marching towards me with a sly grin.
Really Discord?
"What? Your right what was I thinking with these it would take forever!" he said throwing it away as a construction helmet appeared on his head and sledgehammer in his claws giving it a few practice swings. "I'll have you out in no time at all!". he smiled widely before swinging it straight at my head with an explosion of light.
"WAIT! STOP!" I said moving my hands in front of my face. Wait... I moved? "Huh? but you-".
"Oh really now do you think I would do something you would expect me to do? I just wanted to have a little fun before I go." he said smugly before walking off. "Now I'd love to stay and chat some more but I have some Princesses to annoy and a chaos capital to rebuild. Adios!" he said teleporting away.
I stood there for a moment before realizing what he had said "Well I can't let the Princesses know I'm gone yet" I said jumping off my pedestal and putting my things on the ground. Turning back the pedestal I grabbed a piece of chalk from my pocket and began drawing on the stone.
Why didn't I learn to-do circle-less transmutations again?
~1,500 Years Ago~
"COME BACK FOUL TARTARUS SPAWN AND FACE THE WRATH OF THE PRINCESS OF THE NIGHT!!!"
The Royal Canterlot Voice rang out over the forest sending animals running out from their homes and away from their hunt. A shadow passed overhead along with a large gust of wind signalling that Luna was getting closer to my hiding spot.
"THOU CANNOT HIDE VILLAIN WE SHALL FIND YOU AND DRAG THOU BACK TO TARTARUS OURSELF IF WE MUST"
All I did was use alchemy to fix an earth ponies wagon for him, Why is that a crime?
The beat of her wings sounded far into the distance before I came out of from underneath a bush, sighing in relief when I could no longer hear her from the distance.
"We told thee~" A light voice whispered from the tree above followed by a dull thump of hooves on dirt "Thou cannot hide from us".
shit...
Ah, the running and hiding thing. That's right.
I stood back from my work before slamming my hands into the circle. light shone from the chalk borders as rock began to rise up out from the base for a few seconds before finishing. As I stood back up I saw a perfect stone replica of me stood in my place on top of the pedestal standing like I had for the past one and a half thousand years or so.
Making sure there we no signs of alchemy being used left on the statue I picked up my things and headed through the gardens narrowly avoiding three arguing fillies.
ARE THESE PONIES SERIOUSLY DUMB ENOUGH TO FALL FOR THE SAME TRICK FOUR TIMES IN A ROW!?
The only way out I could find without going through the castle itself was past the Royal Guard training field which despite what I had initially thought was going to be hard ended up just being a game of see how many guards I can trick into investigating a strange sound or knock out with a rock from across the field. At the moment I have tricked the same group of guards into chasing after a rock thrown behind them.
"It's over here!" A guard yelled before charging towards the wall.
Do they even train these guys? I mean seriously, Is this the reason the Princesses found me? Because their guards were too incompetent to?
After the sixth time they fell for the trick I decided to sneak pass and break into their barracks, liberating a pack and a few small bags full of golden coins before heading out towards the far wall. Using alchemy to make an tunnel and escaped. But not before hearing the satisfying sound of a angry blue princess using the Royal Canterlot Voice one last time before sealing the tunnel in the wall.
"DISCORD!!!"
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really good schapter
Always liked FMA
This seems like a nice chapter.
I knew someone was going to make a fma one! Also, he can't use circleless transmutation! Oh no, now he's going to have to give up something he needs to gain enough understanding to use it without circles. Or you know interact with the hundreds of tokens flying around the multiverse. Seriously, understanding is supposed to be this big thing, yet these guys pass it along like chain letter.
great chapter
looking forward for more
im intrigued...looking forward to the next chapter
Not bad at all. Could use more meat on it though.
I think there should be a me between those two
================================
Nice one. You sir, have gotten my attention
i want to see this happen
5673986 5674004 5674074 5674100 5674112 5674133 5674193 5674392 5674775 5675195
Thank you everyone and to anyone else who have favourited, rated or just viewed this story. Because of this I will be releasing the next chapter as soon as possible.
~Midnight Tales
I live this concept and I loved how you tied it into the seson two premier
Holy shit he has committed one of the most evilest crimes there is... HELPING PONYS I MEAN WTF LUNA!?!
i0.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/facebook/000/614/786/d15.jpg
5676954 Yes, but he used
AlchemyEvil Witchcraft to do it. He must be evil. Don't you know anything?5677080
That. Is. GENIUS!!!
5677080 I'm afraid I don't get the joke... Please explain it!
5677080 Jesus!
My sides! Bring them back plz!
5678454
No, by the laws of equivalent exchange I gave you funny and you gave me your sides.
They're on my sides now. If you want them back it will cost an arm and a leg.
5678473 No~ I need my ar- wait... which arm and which leg?
5677768 your right how could i have missed that!
Will this be FMA:Brotherhood based?
5678890 You guys need a visit from Darth Subtlety. [youtube=x6KG8-XLE0s]
Do please continue!
"Oh my Faust, he used magic! Quick! Burn him at the stake" said the immortal magical talking pony
Aw, looks like he has a short temper. Oh, was I a little mean?
Only a week of singin it? I bet Pinkie could do a much better job than Discord.
You should really update that author note.
Also I am going to be waiting for when you explain why he can't use circle-less tansmutation and how that impacts the plot.
~Leonzilla
5775956
Because just because, of course. Dur. Everyone know that!
Liked it, alone for the "shortness" joke!
http://cdn.meme.am/instances2/500x/872700.jpgcdn.meme.am/instances2/500x/872700.jpg ha ha short oh my god ales darth vad-
5953564 screw you milk! I don't need you!
5739544 Burn the witch!
"What was that noise?"
"What kind of hoof prints are these?"
Yeah, this is cool. Have you considered crossing over with the other FMA story(ies?) in this group?
About the shortness thing, though... I can relate. It's hard, being vertically challenged, and having one's peers continue to get taller around them. It's hard, and nobody understands.
But now I'm decently tall, so it's sorta better now...
what do you mean he never learned circle-less transmutation? you mean clapping your hands then slamming it into something?