The Mailmare

by Bad Horse

7. Special delivery

Some time later—perhaps a week, perhaps a month; it was impossible to know—Derpy delivered the last of her letters from the raiders. It was to Tale Spin’s mother, a pegasus named Summer Rain who’d lived in one of the sprawling suburbs outside Canterlot. He’d written it on the back of Sweet Mint’s rejection letter, which Derpy admitted she probably didn’t want anymore, and also listed the names and last known locations of some of his mother’s friends and relations. He didn’t even seem to consider that Derpy might harm them. Not that she would. But his trust humiliated her. As if she were harmless. Or maybe he thought she felt grateful to him.

It had hurt Derpy almost more than she could bear to fly in the shadow of the mountain. She’d tried not to look at the scar where Canterlot had been. A fine black powder blew down from it, drifting with the wind, that made her nose run and her eyes water. Once she’d heard what sounded like a bird cawing from the mountain’s upper reaches, but in a deeper tone that would be produced by something with a much larger lung capacity. She’d stayed low to the ground and well away from the mountain after that.

The area around the mountain had been abandoned. Derpy had found the survivors, mostly unicorns, banded together in a new settlement in the plains to its north, which they called New Canterlot. It was a grandiose name for a shanty-town that looked like it had been constructed from the odds and ends left over after building Appleloosa. Unicorns didn’t have the earth pony knack for such things.

Derpy had tracked Tale Spin’s mother down there. She was living with a broad-shouldered stallion named High Hopes. Probably, Derpy thought, she’d squeeze out another sturdy foal or two and give them whatever negligent mothering it was that led a pony to become a raider of the wastes.

Summer Rain had cried when she read the letter.

“Did you see him?” she’d said. “Is he well? Is he getting enough to eat? Has he settled down?”

“I wouldn’t say he’s settled,” Derpy said. “But he’s doing all right for himself.”

“Has he got himself a mare?”

“From time to time,” Derpy said.

Summer Rain smiled and tsk’ed. “He always was a rogue.”

“I expect so, ma’am.”

“Please,” she said, and nodded towards her hovel, little more than a lean-to made of siding from an old barn and a corrugated tin roof. “Come inside. Have some tea. Tell me everything.”

Derpy backed away. “Sorry, ma’am. I have to fly.”

Summer’s face fell. “Surely you’ll wait for me to write a reply?”

“Mail service to his location has been suspended,” Derpy said, trying to keep her face neutral. One advantage of her lazy eye was that ponies were seldom able to read her face.

Summer leaned in close. “Then take me with you! Take me to him! I’ll pay you... “ She looked around her little patch of dirt, and sighed.

Derpy took another step back.

“Please,” Summer said. “Are you a mother yourself? Have you got a little one somewhere?”

“No, ma’am,” Derpy said stonily.

The older mare sniffled. “Well,” she said. “Thank you for your troubles, miss.”

Derpy said nothing.

Summer leaned against one of the posts holding her roof up. “I’m sorry,” she said, looking off toward the mountain. “It’s just… he’s so far away. Life isn’t fair.”

“No, Ma’am,” Derpy said. “It isn’t.”

Comments

[Brickman]

Why the shorter chapters?

[Bad Horse]

5542955 I'll be very cross if they consider this a crossover. The only thing I took from the book was the same basic starting point.

[jazzie366 FLUFFKIN]

5544297 Oh shit featured!

[jazzie366 FLUFFKIN]

inb4 everyone else.

[TheJediMasterEd]

5542639

Nothing stands out as underdeveloped, it maybe just needed some copyediting. Your sense of narrative and character seems strong.

"Raw" has several meanings, and I'm beginning to realize I wasn't quite sure which one I meant. Not all of them are bad.

[Logic Flip]

This is very good. You have me very VERY worried for derpy a few chapters back.

[ponygrad]

5544417
This is the first time I've seen a comment section with two people having horse avatars, and I couldn't stop laughing at the thought of horses gracelessly pounding away on keyboards critiquing other horses' literature.

[Bugsydor]

Hmm... I wonder what's going to kick Derpy back into gear?

[Titanium Dragon]

Some time later—perhaps a week, perhaps a month—Derpy delivered the last of her three remaining letters (not counting the one from Dust Devil).

I didn't really like this line very much; it felt kind of awkward. The wishy-washyness didn't feel like it fits with the rest of the narration.

[Csquared08]

“Are you a mother yourself? Have you got a little one somewhere?”

“No, ma’am,” Derpy said stonily.

Oh. ...Oh. Oh...

5544297
Don't mind me. I'm just disqualifying this fic for being a crossover.

[yamgoth]

Probably, Derpy thought, she’d squeeze out another sturdy foal or two

Dammit XD. This is like the third or fourth time I've caught that line of "squeezing out a foal" in a BH story. It's like BH's bloody catchphrase to go along with "a group of unicorns is called a blessing" and "SQUEE!!!" All good lines, eh? Still, the whole "squeezing out a foal" thing can be taken as something (kinda) innocent, or the most perverse way of describing birth. I'm amused

5544810
<.<
>.>
Perhaps this will interest you then. And not gonna lie, I've had this imagery pop into my head. Except gracefully tapping away instead. The only time it's graceless is when alcohol and drugs involved. Then it's one horse completely passed out on the floor while the other is bashing his hoof on the keyboard and, against all odds, still making readable, yet disgustingly bleak, fanfiction. When he was originally trying to comment on someone's blog. This is successful horse.