• Published 15th Jan 2015
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Equestria Was Merely a Setback! - Thunderscourge



Trixie, stranded from Equestria and in a mysterious land named Azeroth, tries to get by day by day...but it'd be easier if there weren't so many Crack Elves, zombies, and pesky gnomes getting in her way! Comedy/satire crossover with World of Warcraft

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Level 36.75: Shooing the Hypotenuse

A/N: Special thanks to Booster Spice, treegrowth, PrinceUniversa, NordicAeon, the other sans, GamerGoddessDin, Kriysix, Sidetrack, Housecarl of Clan Drops, Mister E, Echowing, Kitsuja, and Godzilladragon for all of your comments since last time! Things have been really busy in real life, but I managed to scrape this out in the moments of writing freedom I've gotten thanks to your support, so thank you all and I hope to continue hearing your thoughts as we continue on!

Also, sorry once more for a dialogue heavy chapter, what was originally going to be like 2 chapters was so long I had to split it into about four or five. This should be the last part of that first chapter, whereas the coming chapter will be business as usual with some dialogue here and there.

Hope you all enjoy, and I hope to hear your thoughts in the comments below! For the Emperor!


A cacophony of unfamiliar noises met Mograine's ears as he approached the practicing grounds of the base he and the others had fled to, though Mograine had come to at least expect their sound when he had been told he had to bring along him. Abbendis had ordered that Mograine not just bring those personally loyal to him, though she did so without directly addressing what had been his plan. Still, Mograine did not think much of this, for he was sure that he could defeat the fools who had come to the Monastery should he be granted any aid at all: he had fought them near evenly when by himself, and even without one of his arms he felt that the aid of an entire force of rookies and veterans both would be far more than enough to make up for the loss of an arm.

"Mograine. What has made you scurry this way?"

Stepping out into the training field, Mograine was surprised that the man he came to find had seemingly sensed his approach despite having his back turned. Wearing heavy armor that was colored opposite of the Crusade's normal gear by being mostly red with white being the trim, even the large Mograine was towered over by this man who carried a contraption Mograine felt crude and unfit for a true warrior: it was like the guns that were becoming more and more commonplace in this era as technology expanded, but unlike them it was capable of rapid fire at the cost of precision. Fed ammunition from a backpack via a belt that was fed into the weapon, Mograine had heard it said that it was a gift from Grand Crusader Dathrohan prior to a campaign across the Plaguelands to destroy villages and settlements that could feed the growing armies of the Scourge while saving what few could be actually moved in time.

It was a dark period of their history, and few spoke of it, but Mograine had been there and could not care less. Their cause was just, and if wiping people off the map would deprive their enemies of their tools of destruction than that was what the Crusade would do. Opposing them had been a force of Humans from Stormwind who managed to inflict severe damage on the Crusade forces carrying out the campaign, but they did so at the cost of their lives thanks to the might of Dathrohan and his soldiers. The survivors from it were some of the Crusade's most battle-hardened soldiers as a result of Stormwind's intervention, meaning that while Mograine found his comrade's attitude to be lacking, he would be valuable in terms of raw combat potential.

"Brother Avitus, our leader would have us bring to justice those who brought the Monastery to heel. Will you join me in taking vengeance for our fallen comrades?"

The larger soldier did not bother to turn back to face Mograine as he lifted his weapon, what would be labeled a gatling gun by some, and levied it at the targets in front of him even as they lay in ruins after the last clip of concentrated firepower that ripped through the targets and dummies and pelted the stone wall beyond them, damaging even it as well. Rather than small pellet like bullets as were used in pistols, the rounds fired by the weapon named unsubtly the "Neverending Hail of Devastation" by Dathrohan were larger and longer than a finger. Further enhancing their sheer destructive capabilities was the blessed nature of each bullet, having had the power of the Light imbued within them by their priests thanks to Avitus likely threatening them to grant him such a boon. This increased their damage against Undead targets who would be stung by the Light, in addition to just packing more of a normal punch.

"Which would they be, brother?" after one target dummy was reduced to absolutely nothing, Avitus glared back at Mograine as his voice dripped with scathing, sardonic wit, "The ones you foolishly led to their deaths, or those slain by the Undead when you were running for your life?"

With no instant response to give, Mograine fell silent as his mouth remained open as if to speak. How dare this man question his honor! Seemingly pleased by the response, Avitus turned back to his annihilation of the practice targets as he worked to hone his killing capabilities further. Mograine watched this with scorn as he stupidly thought of a retort, looking down on his comrade's method of combat just as his comrade looked down upon him.

To Mograine, to fire steel down upon one's foes rather than inflict it personally in the form of melee combat was a disgrace, as was wasting the power of the Light on such an affair, but he was not about to make his complaints known. Just as Mograine himself carried a reputation as a glory-seeker, the grey haired veteran before him carried quite the reputation for his temper. Mograine, if he had come to fight, would not have been too worried since it was not as if the slow and lumbering Crusader could keep pace with Mograine, for heavy armor, a heavy backpack made of metal, and a heavy weapon all left this other Crusader more of a walking weapon platform than a normal combatant. Mograine reckoned that if he could just get close he could best the man easily by just knocking him over, but that would be the trick: not being cut down by a hail of gunfire prior to reaching him.

Finally Mograine managed to come up with a response, though it was not particularly inspired or even as intelligent or manipulative as he would have hoped, "Your tongue is sharp as ever, but think of what we may obtain in defeating these upstarts."

He had approached Avitus during his response, thinking that the safest place to be right beside the ranged specialist, but he would be proven wrong as Avitus stopped holding his heavy weapon in two hands and used the now free one to push Mograine out of his way, the force of his shove being of a strength one would expect of a man his size with the end result being Mograine falling flat on his ass, "You are every bit as incompetent as I believed you to be, Mograine. In your state even I could defeat you in close combat, and I may just revel in the opportunity to beat you to death with your remaining arm."

Feeling that this was a way of turning down his offer to join them, as per Abbendis' suggestion, Mograine scoffed at what he felt to be cowardice, "Avitus, the 'Blood Raven'. Few of our number match your firepower, and none match your fury. I did not think a man of your nature would turn down such a challenge."

A wry grin found itself on the lips of the veteran now staring down at Mograine, "Oh, I will be coming with you, but do not think that it is because of your shallow quest for power or glory. I will see to it that those who have opposed us are brought to heel, as well as any others who get in my way."

Brushing himself off, Mograine felt his recruitment mission to be a success and decided to finish filling in his comrade on the situation, "Speaking of which, we will be aided by mere recruits who will only slow us down. Do you have any thoughts on how to handle them?"

"They will prove themselves or die, I do not particularly care which," the larger Crusader did not finish his humiliation of Mograine at just having knocked him over though, for once Mograine was standing up Avitus grabbed him by the collar and hoisted him up into the air with a firm grip as the one armed man struggled to free himself, "But let us be clear, Mograine, I will not abide betrayal. Step out of line, sacrifice your allies for your narcissism, and I will slay you just as you once slew your own father."

"You..."

Having said his piece, Avitus casually dropped Mograine onto the ground, showing that while Mograine might be in charge of the operation, the veteran had no intention of seeing him as a superior. As Mograine in anger reached for a dagger, Avitus kicked it out of his hand, stomped on his fingers, and then strode away from the firing range all the while laughing caustically.

"Come, brother. We have a mission to fulfill, and while I may not be fleet of foot I am not going to spend a moment more than is necessary waiting to exact our vengeance. If you truly wish to replace the High General, and for that witch who follows you to replace Grand Inquisitor Isillien, you will do well to not fail in this quest. The Crusade has no place for the incompetent and feeble."

With Avitus gone, Mograine was left with his pride wounded and stewing in murderous rage. When he was alone he was approached by someone who had been hiding in the shadows, Whitemane, who began tending to both his damaged body and pride.

"Let him laugh now. We will be the ones who have the last."

Mograine nodded, looking forward for an opportunity now to slip a blade through his comrade's armor, "I had only thought to sacrifice the recruits, but perhaps our veterans need to be cleaned out when the time comes..."


"Grand Moff is a title designating one as overseer of significant territory in an empire, at least where I originate from. One could consider it a Governor of more land than all of you have likely ever seen put together. Where you come from however, I have been granted it as a simple formality, and my duties tend more towards aiding your mother in her rule."

Trixie could see that her question about what a "Grand Moth" was caused some exasperation in their new guest, but he kept a polite face all the same. Seeing as how he appeared to be indulging her and her questions, Trixie decided to press on.

"By my mother, do you mean Lulamoon?"

"No, not your birth mother, rather the one who formally adopted you after your tenure as her student: Princess Luna, as you would know her."

Kael looked over to Trixie and found what he expected: Trixie was grappling with what she was being told by this man in such a knowing manner. Tarkin did not appear to be lying to them, so what he was saying ought to be true...and if Trixie was related to some kind of royalty, didn't that mean that she too was royalty just as he was?

Still struggling with this, Trixie bit her lip and continued to ask about what she was now assuming was the case, "So I'm a Princess?"

Tarkin nodded from the seat he had taken, "In a manner of speaking, yes. You do not hold inheritance rights like her natural born children do, but you possess the same prestige as if you were a daughter of Luna yourself."

In a complete reversal of her uncertainty a moment before, Trixie's eyes lit up as she thought of something from her past that she had since recalled in the Scarlet Monastery.

"Hah, in your face Twilight!" Trixie exclaimed while pumping both arms up in the air, a big grin on her face.

Kael didn't remember if Trixie had brought up someone named Twilight before, so he too inquired about something, "Who is Twilight?"

Trixie's arms moved from above her head to being crossed over her chest, her momentary glee replaced by pouting indignation, "A stupid, judgmental meanie head who thinks she is better than Trixie."

"Is she better than you?"

"That's besides the point!"

Tarkin clearing his throat returned Trixie back to the conversation at hand rather than her own little tangent, with Trixie then clearing her own throat for a moment to try and save face.

"So, Mister Moth, you plan on taking me home, don't you?"

Her voice was a mixture of nervous and excited, excited at the prospect that she could go to her own home where she likely had a loving family waiting for her, but nervous because she was kind of wrapped up in the various plots and conspiracies surrounding her dear friend Kael and the world she woke up in. To go home would be to abandon the adventures here, and she had to admit she was having fun even if they were living their lives on the edge each day.

The response played out like music to Trixie's ears to Tarkin's surprise, though he hid it well as he explained the situation further, "Yes, but I am afraid that we will likely have to wait some time before that can occur. You see, there seems to be quite the time distortion between this place and your home, one that runs counter to how most would understand time to be. From my investigation, you have had a presence here of a few weeks, correct?"

"Yeah, that sounds about right," Trixie nodded, having lost track of the specific days she had been here along the way. Maybe two weeks? Probably less she thought...

"In your home world, you have been gone for years. Those that were infants and children when you left are adults, and much has happened since you disappeared."

The idea that she had essentially lost a couple decades in her own world brought a sick feeling to Trixie's stomach, but at the very least she had some comfort in knowing that to Luna a couple decades meant little in terms of her lifespan. She wanted to go home to her so badly...but something in the back of her brain was also yelling at her not to, as if there was a reason she was here and not home with Luna and the others in Equestria.

This brought to mind another query, one which Trixie asked with some hesitation, "Do you know why I ended up here?"

Sensing Trixie's apprehension, Kael took her hand in his own to comfort her. She readily accepted this physical gesture and even moved a bit closer to him as he sat beside her, not showing any discomfort at them having their bodies right up against one another.

A half-second of thought revealed that what was about to be said was a carefully constructed response from Tarkin, who dodged answering her completely, "Strictly speaking, no, I do not, but your history is not for me to speak of for I was not yet a part of your family's empire when that occurred. My companions Adagio and Aria appear to know you from then, though they are former criminals you defeated for Luna and so they hold a petty grudge at present. Their lives and freedom hinge on the success of this mission, so they are obedient to some degree, but I would suggest that you avoid them when it is possible."

Trixie made a mental note to do as this man said and avoid the other two women if at all possible, but she doubted that if this group was going to tag along that she would be able to forever. She still felt a certain offputting coldness from the man, but his knowledge of her world gave Trixie an intrinsic trust of him since for once she was dealing with someone who was of her own kind...sort of.

Something else was nagging at the back of Trixie's mind, and that was her ever present need to feel validated and loved due to a crushing lack of self-esteem, "How is Princess Luna? Does she miss me?"

Tarkin's response was perhaps a bit blunt, but it did answer her query this time, "You are presumed dead by many thanks to the time that has passed, and without contrary evidence she is among them. This expedition seeks to rectify your being missing."

Seeking to clarify the time-table they were working on and also feeling a pang in her heart at the thought of making her beloved mentor think she was dead all these years, Trixie brought up the issue of leaving again, "So when can I go home? I don't want her feeling bad because of me..."

"My contact has told me that the odd time difference between this realm and your own makes it difficult to say, but that based on their studies and approximations that three years will go by here in what would seem to be a blink of an eye there. First this realm lagged, now it is racing ahead. By the time the gateway between worlds is established again those three years, if not more, will have passed. Until then it is my duty to assure your safety, and if need be that of this world should it prove to endanger you in some way."

Looking aside, Tarkin caught a glimpse of a picture frame with the innkeeper's family on it which made the auburn haired man smile in seeming recognition. This was not lost upon Trixie, who gave him a questioning look. As a subordinate now to her, Tarkin offered up what was on his mind.

"The innkeeper here is familiar to me. You see, there is a connection between different world, dimensions, realities and what have you, and that is through Hel. We all end up in the same landscape, unless one is fortunate enough to be among the privileged few to end up in Valhalla."

Trixie remembered her experience in what she thought very clearly was Hel, and she bit her lip as she remembered that she still meant to unburden those memories upon Kael, for the more she thought of them, the worse she felt and he was always there to comfort her.

Tearing herself from these thoughts, Trixie instead focused on the revelation Tarkin brought up and the seeming contradiction that the innkeeper posed.

"So how do you know him if he's alive?"

"The realm known as Hel is also timeless in a regard, but more to your point the ruler of Hel is a woman by the name of Hela. As the daughter of Loki Odinson, Hela is your sister by marriage and has proven most useful to our Empress by providing to her talents from the underworld she reigns over...such as myself among others."

That cleared things up just a bit, so Trixie nodded as she thought she understood, "So you know him through this?"

"He serves as the tactical leader of the army your mother is amassing at present, with a council of other once deceased beings aiding him and I in our duties. In the world he hails from he was murdered by religious fanatics attempting to change the tides of history right before he could make peace with an opposing army, having fought the far larger army to a standstill with raw genius and cunning without ever once having lost a battle," Tarkin spoke with respect, something Trixie felt he did not give out very often if almost ever.

"But he's just a history nerd, how can he be what you're saying he is?" Trixie jested, "Maybe we should ask for his help if he's here in some form..."

Tarkin shook his head no, his natural pragmatism set aside this once, "He should not exist in the world of Azeroth, which makes me think that there is a hidden truth to this land you have been inhabiting, one we should unravel. For the time being, we should allow the retired soldier to live the life of peace he sought in life."

This did a good deal to undo Trixie's original misgivings of the scary, villainous looking man. It appeared that he truly respected his colleague, even if they were meeting under different circumstances here and now.

Standing up, Tarkin nodded towards the staircase leading to the bedrooms of the inn, "Now, I understand if this is all a lot to you, so I will give you time to digest what I have said. There is quite some time before we will be returning to your homeland, and it is our duty at present to protect you until that time comes. We will make arrangements concerning this in the morning."

Trixie had so much more she wanted to ask, but her brain was exhausted by then and she was feeling her eyes begin to droop. It was time for sleep, and she could always ask him another time, so she agreed and let him go. As the Human put his first foot on the staircase someone else spoke up though, this being someone who just pushed open the inn's door and was glaring across the room at their associate, "Tarkin, would it kill you to wait for once?"

Looking back only briefly, Tarkin continued his way upstairs while speaking in a dismissive voice, "Perhaps it would, but that point is moot at this moment. Jaina Proudmoore, introduce yourself to your former ally and the princess in his company. I will be resting effective immediately, for not all of us take things at a leisurely pace."

Though it had been a lifetime ago, when Kael looked across the room at the newest person he felt his body freeze in recognition of her.

'Jaina Proudmoore...' his mind whispered to him, not bothering to explain why he felt a sudden connection to this woman he ought to have been seeing for the first time but that he felt he knew.

Jaina was suffering from a similar feeling of seeing someone for the first time in ages, staring right into Kael's glowing green eyes and finding that even though she had been searching for him, she had no idea what truly to say, "Kael..."

In response, Kael spoke her name as well, also at a loss for words, "Jaina..."

Fortunately or unfortunately depending on one's perspective, the reunion was interrupted by a bright purple flash from next to Kael that preceded Trixie appearing only a few feet in front of Jaina, exiting her teleport at just enough of a distance to mockingly introduce herself.

"Trixie. Nice to meet you."

Jaina's face formed part of a snarl as she recognized Trixie as the Elf who flippantly walked away when Jaina was trying to get Kael's attention. Now the same Elf was taking a less than friendly tone with her, and so Jaina began to take it personally, "I saw you in Stormwind. Why did you ignore me when I was calling out for Kael?"

To Jaina's surprise Trixie jabbed the shorter woman in the collarbone with a finger, purple eyes narrowing harshly at the other Mage, "Because I heard about you, Jaina Proudmoore. A poor little Human who wants peace and love and happiness and all of that, but who fell in love with a Human tyrant who went on to bring his race to near destruction after murdering his own father and mentor. A man who ushered in a reign of terror with hordes of Undead and caused the deaths of untold innocents," Trixie was trying to hold back her anger and was failing miserably as more and more resentment crept into her voice with each word, "Meanwhile, she was breaking the heart of a poor man who was actually a good person. Someone who would go on to suffer at the hands of her beloved when said Human razed their homeland to the ground and slaughtered their people."

Looking past Trixie for aid from Kael, Jaina found that he was wordless, completely at a loss of what to say between the normally goofy Trixie getting protective over him against someone who appeared to be an old love of his. What could he possibly say in such a situation, the woman he loved being scolded by the woman he loves yet was not in a relationship with?

Trixie carried on as she continued to stand in-between Jaina and the Prince she was feeling very possessive over, "Kael is my best friend, and I am not going to let some foolish woman come walking back into his life and hurt him again."

"Trixie..."

Kael tried to say something to calm her down, but his words died in his throat when Jaina shook her head and moved past Trixie and towards the staircase.

"It's been a long day. I'm just glad that I've confirmed what I wanted to know," glancing over at her old friend, Jaina shot him a sad look, "Kael, we need to talk tomorrow. Alone."

Once she left, Trixie sat down at a nearby table where Lavitz was seated, him having watched the entire affair in silence. It wasn't his place to intervene, and the advice on his mind was not the sort one would share in front of a group, but rather what you would tell a friend one on one. After venting a moment, Trixie closed her eyes and teleported back to her other seat, only now instead of just being beside him she was actively leaning against him.

"Trixie, I..."

Her eyes and voice as if they were about to cry, Trixie wrapped her arms around her partner who she suddenly feared would think she stepped over the line concerning personal relationships, "Please don't be mad."

His arms wrapping around her body gave some indication of his thoughts before Kael managed to finally speak, his head curling up into her neck as he embraced the Elf beside him.

"I'm not mad Trixie. You were worried about me and wanted to protect me. How could I fault you over that?"

Looking up at him after that, Trixie realized something: she was blushing, and a part of her really, really wanted to close what little distance there was between them to kiss him. Shocked at this, Trixie looked down away from him as her cheeks remained flushed red. She dismissed the thoughts as being heretical, for they were just friends and partners, nothing more...

But that was the first time in her life she could recall ever truly wanting to press her lips up against someone else's. Be it out of jealousy, love, or whatever other emotion was coursing through her, Trixie felt as if she had committed a crime by thinking of him like that even in a fleeting moment.

Since Trixie was visibly exhausted and was having trouble sitting up, Kael helped her stand up and began to usher her towards their room, "Come on, let's go to bed. We've been up for quite awhile, and we both need it I think."

The feeling of suddenly being challenged by Jaina's entrance faded as Trixie realized that whatever had happened in the past between Kael and Jaina, the sweet and kind prince was her partner now...and, if she were honest in her selfishness, she wanted that to always be the case.


"A letter from the Grand Crusader...interesting..."

"Brothers, they march on the Scourge in Scholomance. Pick up your arms, we leave at once!"

Author's Note:

As this chapter outright states, there is quite a big cause behind why all these crossovers are happening...well, more than one cause since there is a different reason why say Trixie's there than why certain others are. Why? How? Well these are questions still to be answered, but I laid out quite a lot this chapter so that's all for now.

Also, since all the Crusaders I'll be featuring in the near future are Paladins except for Whitemane, I thought it would be good to add a representative of their ranged combatants...but I killed their notable Hunter from the Monastery, so we have Avitus. Another reference :raritywink:, but a quite apt one given that he is a part of a religious cult of sorts whose main color is red among other reasons such as serving as a distinct counterpart to Mograine.

Avitus doesn't really have much of a sense of humor (oddly fitting picture).

Anyways, I hope you enjoyed, and I hope you're up for a wild ride as we move into our next dungeon! Please leave your thoughts in the comments below, as they do truly help me in creating more content for you all!

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