• Member Since 24th Jul, 2013
  • offline last seen September 9th

Fan of Fanfics

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Readers +1

Don't disappoint me.

This story looks interesting.

The title intrigued me... but now... I dunno... I'll watch this for now.

Mmm...Bacon flavored ramen.

I think I'm completely, utterly burnt out on annoying-loudmouth-convinces-jaded-semi-evil-person-to-turn-over-new-leaf-with-his-earnest-and-naive-ways Naruto stories, but if it's not just following that deeply trod path I'd be interested in more.

Darn it you beat me to it, I'm currently working on writing my own Sunset Shimmer goes to Konoha but it's the one from that holiday special comic. Honestly it feels like one of those Naruto gets fend up/betrayed and leaves Konoha fics.

Anyway I'm looking forward to more of this, I wonder how long it will take for Naruto to drive Sunset nuts.

BTW I tried to add this story to the Naruto group but I can't for some reason.

5482828 You couldn't get it added because Karasu87 already did lol. He can also attest to the fact that I've been working on this for a LONG time. The only reason I got it out so quickly was because nobody bothered to check out the new Chapter of Shinobi of Equestria I posted like, 2 weeks ago, and I was somewhat miffed. lol.

5481683 There will be hints of that, but not too much, don't worry.

Well in my defense it wasn't showing up at first anyway. Also the story I plan/want to write is focused on Sunset from IDW's comic EQG holiday special in which she is accused of stealing and spreading secrets and treated as such, even by her so-called friends and unable to deal with it she leaves using a spell she picked up on the portal and ends up in Naruto's world. Problem is I can't decide which point in the timeline I should put her in. Pre-start and have her end up raising Naruto? Meeting/joining Sasuke in between Part 1 and 2 or post-war? Honestly I can see Sunset and Naruto have a close-sibling type of relationship for some reason.

Nonetheless this story looks very promising. Just one quick question: are there going to be human/ninja counterparts to the ponies?

5483642 Haven't decided on that yet. I decided to go Pre-Chuunin exams for time-line in mine, as I want Sunset herself to draw parallels between herself and a certain 'former-student gone bad' in the Naruto-verse, and that influences much of her decisions later. As for yours, I would say that you should come up with an overlying plot first, and then decide which time would best suit her arrival. I guess just consider which makes, to you, a more compelling thing to write.

To be honest they all sound to be quiet compelling to write, I mean Sunset having to raise/look after Naruto and see him being hated for something he didn't do while she was hated for things she did. Or have her join Sasuke and watch him descend deeper and deeper into darkness and madness. Or perhaps join him on his quest for redemption and learn what a true friend is. Hmm I could give both a try.

Also if you do decide to add human/ninja counterparts then can you consider giving them more native names. Just a suggestion.
And yeah I would love to see how Sunset would react to meeting someone like Orochimaru. Or Nagato. Or Obito. Is it just me or has there been some sort of curse of teacher vs student/sibling student vs sibling student coming down from Sarutobi and his team? Think about it: Sarutobi* fought Orochimaru, Jiraiya* fought Nagato, Minato* fought Obito, and Kakashi fought Sasuke. *All three died because of it for one reason or another. Orochimaru and Jiraiya fought, Kakashi fought Obito, and Naruto fought against both Nagato and Sasuke.

Man is Sunset going to have a lot to think about. Depending on how your story goes.

5483829 I know. And that's BEFORE MLP villains get thrown in the mix. The Dazzlings will make a significant plot relative appearance/s (though this won't turn into a song-fic), and Sunset will be bringing Naruto to Equestria later. I got the entire plot of the entire story ironed out, but for a few details. The problem is going to be getting my ideas from my brain to the computer screen, as usual.

But again, I was disappointed that this got so much more attention than Shinobi of Equestria did. Starting a major arc for that story, whereas this story itself is just getting released.

True or you get a good idea/scene but can't find the chance to write down and once you sit down to write you draw a blank. I can't help but wonder how Naruto's time in Equestria will go in this story.

And I'm guessing this story is getting more attention because it has Sunset going to Naruto's world instead of Naruto or other character going to Equestria.

5484476 That could be, but Shinobi of Equestria has Gaara being possessed by the dual efforts of Shukaku and the Nightmare Forces in an 'enemy of my enemy' scenario, Luna's been hospitalized from the attack, and Celestia is literally spitting fire...To be honest, the biggest problem people have isn't the plot, it's the fact that I'm only giving Naruto Pinkie and AJ for the pairing.

I just have way too many ideas at this point. I really should work on Fox in Equestria : Revamped, but am lacking the focus to stay on that. This fic and SoE are gonna eat me alive I think.

Hmmm that does sound really interesting about Gaara being possessed. The pairing bit, yeah that would play a huge factor in a story's popularity and whatnot. I will admit that I stopped reading some good Naruto fanfiction because of the pairing aside from character bashing and just bad plot or writing style.

But anyway I'm not going to hound you over the pairings for this story or any of your others, mainly because NaruHina is canon :pinkiehappy:, but anyway for this maybe you should built up potential pairings between certain characters, see how readers react and how it feels to you and then go on from that.

Honestly I can't help but see the Mane Six fighting over a boy to be a very funny sight. But that's just my opinion.

Also my advice for FiER is to read/watch stories focus on the bond between mother and child that might help you out a bit.

I find this story rather interesting hope the second chapter comes in soon.

The pase is not so srush, just a little, the story is written whithout the minimum amount of detail, you assume that we know a lot of thinks, and even if we do, you should write the story as if we don't know anything at all, try to explain thoughts procceses, inert opinions, etc. but the story has potential, although it needs to be a large one, good luck.

I like this fic here!^_^

I don't know if you're taking suggestions or not but I really, really, really hope you make Sunset a fillyfooler(lesbian) in this fic.

Maybe pair her with Tenten.

Way that could work out is if Tenten found out any kids she had with Neji would be given the slave brand of the clan and that could cause her to break it off with him and look elsewhere.

Maybe where she looked could be at Sunset, and then Tenten could date her too.

5536567 the story is Naruto/Sunset for now, but there could possibly be some expansion later on...

This is off to a GREAT start! I really enjoyed this first chapter/prologue. So Sunny is in the Shinobi World eh? Wonder what this'll lead to? Will she learn any jutsu? And if she does, will she use it for good, or evil purposes? THAT is the main question. Either way, I hope that this story is updated soon cause I can see great potential!

I wonder when Sunset will be honest with Naruto... I mean the guy is such a ray of sunshine (no pun intended) he makes his active enemies his friends in some cases, and Sunset might be somewhere between neutral and against him.

5745105 It will come. Naruto won't be the only one changed by the upcoming Chuunin exams.

5745128 Where are we Naruto-Timeline wise anyway?

Well now! This was quite an interesting chapter in my opinion. Yeesh! Some medications huh? Lol. Great work! Keep it up!

5745144 Just before the Exams start. This makes Naruto 12-13, and Sunset's human form about 14. Might seem like an early place to situate this, but by Equestrian standards (and mentally) Sunset is an adult, and this gives her a special perspective. Also, I need plenty of time for the villains' plan to form and come to fruition.

5745151 Hey, Equestia is a rather sugar coated world...sometimes literally. I can't imagine they would have very powerful drugs. The Elemental Nations, on the other hand...It seemed to make sense when I wrote it, lol.

5745167 Heh. True enough. Anyways, quick question, any reason why this fic is now M? Just curious is all. And will Sunset change her ways in due time?

5745173 I technically needed to bump it up due to the tub scene. Highest you can go with T rating is supposed to be 'implied' sexual acts. This was a bit over implied. And yes, Sunset will change her ways. But it will take some introspection on her part, as she sees (second-hand) what she's becoming...make of that what you will lol.

5745184 Huh. Very interesting! I'm definitely looking forward to the next chapter now! Good luck!

5745184 A certain white snake?

5745192 I can neither confirm nor deny that one run-away, power hungry student will have any effect on another...and please stay out of my head!

During the exams, Sunset is about to get a sobering lesson on just what kind of world she has entered, especially if the Invasion and such still happens. I'm guessing at this point she will see Naruto's battle with Gaara, including summoning Gamabunta and the combination transformation into the Kyuubi (or at least a giant fox).
The sheer violence combined with Gaara's aura of pure malice at that time should open here eyes to just how far she is in over her head. That's my guess for the time being at least.

I am enjoying this story and I do hope that you continue it.



Do you really need to ask after this chapter?

Well that was unexpected, and by THAT I mean, well you know what I mean.

But I wonder how the rest of Team 7 will react to Sunset.

5745249 Hey I just wanted to make sure is all! Geez. Cut me some slack.

5745254 My first time actually describing a sexual act in-story. 48 stories of various categories. 627,819 total words published. My first described sexual act and it's an MLP story...I don't know if that's highly amusing or mildly disturbing...

Great chapter. I didn't expected the bathroom scene but I found it hilarious the way Sunset made Naruto faint.

5745289 To be honest, I wasn't going to add the tub scene in...then I remembered making the joke about Sunset being a cheap drunk, and a total lightweight when it came to drugs and alcohol. Then I figured...eh, why not?

5745201 Tooooooo laaaaaaaaate..... :pinkiecrazy::pinkiehappy::pinkiecrazy:

5745433 NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Well I wasn't expecting to see this updated, but it was okay. Though honestly I'm wondering what exactly can happen in this story. Sunset as it stands has no powers and likely couldn't be trained fast enough, so fighting is out. Magic doesn't exist in the ninja world and there is no way for her to access it.

I'm just guessing this will probably be a relatively short story of some kind. Just asking cause I'm not sure how far this story could go based on it's premise. Though I don't mean that in a bad or rude way, just asking.


Sunset as it stands has no powers and likely couldn't be trained fast enough, so fighting is out. Magic doesn't exist in the ninja world and there is no way for her to access it.

Oh, there is a way. Just not yet. But in order to access it, I require someone/s who are old enough, and well versed in various magics. But WHO? WHO could I POSSIBLY use???



(ps, I don't mean this mean-spiritedly. My point is, there is quite a few options for where I can take this, so don't go assuming)

I would say that it's both for a number of reasons.

5745506 Quite Possibly. And I feel there will be more in the future. That said, I refuse to let this story become just a smut-fic. Don't get me wrong, I love me some smut. However, I care about the story itself more.

You could do what the author of 'The Chase' does and write them separately.

Like the T-rated Daybreak and the M-rated Daybreak: Icha Icha Days or something.

5745819 Not my style. Some people might like that, but I do not. I think sex can enhance a story, but unlike some authors who I won't name on here, I believe a story should be ABLE to stand on its own merits without it. But again, I have nothing against some raunchiness in a fic. It's just my opinion.

It was just a suggestions but you do have a point. However I do hope that any further raunchiness in your story will result in extremely funny and awkward situations.

5745885 Oh, have no doubt. There may not be any actual intercourse between Naruto and Sunset for quite a while, but amusing and awkward situations shall abound.

Reminds me of this one fanfic that started during the beetle mission with Team 8 in which Naruto saw Hinata naked, Hiashi and Tsunade found out and due to some old Hyuuga Tradition the two genin had to get married.

As you would expect that led to a lot of extremely funny, weird and awkward situations.:rainbowlaugh: I got to go and see if I can find it again.

Also should I be expecting for our dear little Sunset to take advantage of Hinata's crush on Naruto for her own gain due to the Hyuuga clan's status?

5745497 Have her be visited by Hagoromo? He has been around for a verrry long time,might not be the first time he has seen a Equestrian, maybe just give her a very subtle hint, don't even have to say it is him, and have Sunset try it out, wondering where it came from, it could be a test run of what would happen if he had given both of his sons power (Sunset's personality at the moment kind of resembles Indra's, thinking that power is what is needed in the world.) I really don't want her to rely on the Sirens.

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