Steve's Odd Job

by thechicken95

1. Discovery

Pinkie Pie was sitting on a table outside Sugarcube Corner. She looked around, and noticed that there were only several patrons who were mending to their meals. Weekday mornings usually weren't the busiest time of day, even in the best of weather and would be a perfect backdrop for the meeting. Slouching over the table she played with a salt shaker, which was very amusing for her, but only for a short while. Sighing loudly, she sat back up, and positioned herself more comfortably on the chair. Looking outside at the street, she saw a few ponies out. Not surprising as the weather ponies were bringing in a storm around ten that morning, and several dark grey clouds had already been moved in the area.

Pinkie could feel her heart start to pound faster with every passing minute. She wasn't exactly sure if the pony that she was meeting with even got the note. As those minutes began turning into hours, she felt like giving up, but still decided to stay not wanting to disappoint her client. She began tapping her hoof on the wooden table. The sound of her taping was the only sound outside, as the patrons all moved inside because of the rainstorm that was starting. Pinkie stayed dry, as she picked one of the few tables that had umbrellas over them. Her eyelids were beginning to droop, and she was nodding her head up and down. Just as she was going to rest her eyes, a stranger's voice snapped her back into reality.

"So you're the girl that I met a while back huh?"The stranger had a real deep, gruff voice. Pinkie couldn't see much of what the colt looked like; much of his body being covered by a grey cape. From what she could tell, he had soft blue eyes, and what appeared to be yellow skin.

"Yep! I Knew that I'd have to use your card eventually! I'm so glad that you came!" Pinkie said, relieved.

"Well here I am, ready to serve an Element of Harmony." The colt said, bowing.

"Thank you, thank you, and thank you again so much for being here! I need your help bad!" Pinkie whispered with a buzz of excitement.

"It's not a problem. I'm always here to help out a pony in need." The colt said. Clearing his throat, he continued. "So what seemed to be your problem?"

"It's not for me, but for one of my friends. My awesome friend Rainbow Dash has her pet stuck in a cloud!" Pinkie stood up on the chair, showing how high the cloud was. The colt stared at her blankly for a moment, then expressed a half confused, half frustrated look on his face.

"Isn't Rainbow a Pegasus?"

"Yep! But she broke both her wings trying to do a super amazing stunt, but ran into a tree that broke one wing, and when she hit the ground she broke the other one on impact. And before you say anything, Fluttershy is sick, and Twilight is visiting family in Canterlot along with Rarity." Pinkie spoke swiftly, leaving the colt in a daze as he tried to follow what she said. There was silence between them for a while that was interrupted by the pounding rain hitting the umbrella.

"How did you... Never mind." He said, rubbing his temples. "What I want to know, is why you chose me to do this. Couldn't you have called that Discord friend of yours?" Pinkie raised an eyebrow, and then chuckled.

"Well, Discord isn't really my friend, just Fluttershy's. He'd probably create more torment for the poor thing. The reason why I called you, Steve, is that you're the best pony fit for the job!" Pinkie said, smiling at him.

"Thank you Pinkie, but that isn't exactly the type of work that I do. Though since you asked, I'll do it anyways. How many bits are we talking?" Steve said with a yawn, rubbing his eyes.

"I'll pay 250 up front, and the rest when you get her pet back." Pinkie said. "Hold on just one second while I grab those bits." Pinkie got up, and walked back inside to grab the bits. Steve sat, horrified at what he'd gotten himself into with this crazy ass pony. He was a spy for the Princess,not some kind of pet savior. He wondered if he would even stay awake for this 'mission.' He had nearly passed out while listening to Pinkie multiple times. He shrugged his shoulder to try and relax. The day before, he had just been reprimanded by his boss, and hadn't slept since then, his anxiety levels reaching new heights as he waited to be discharged.

He hadn't noticed it before, but this town wasn't exactly the hub of Equestria. This place was the so called busiest in town, and he found that hard to believe. Even with the rain starting to let up now, his breathing was the only sound that he could hear, interrupting the cold silence. Looking up, he saw the party pony bounce out of the store, bag clinched in her mouth. Plopping the bag down on the table, she sat down, with a huge grin on her face. That grin caused Steve to flinch a little. He wondered in awe, and in disgust at how a pony could be so damn happy all the time.

"Alright, where's this little critter at?" Steve asked.

"She's by Sweet Apple Acres. I can lead you there if you'd like!" Pinkie said.

"Thank you, I'd appreciate that." Pinkie nodded, and walked towards the gravel road. Steve followed, struggling to keep up with Pinkie. The sun had cleared up by the time that they reached the farm, and ponies were out and about, which started to make Bob believe that this little village did have some life in it after all. Maybe it could be a place where he would settle down now that he didn't have a home after being force out of Canterlot.

"Here we are! And the pet is up there." Pinkie said, pointing to one of the few clouds that were left in the sky. The turtle was standing on the middle of the cloud, his head inside his shell.

"Do you happen to know where I could get a ladder tall enough to get to the turtle?" Steve asked, looking up at the cloud.

"Ohh! I think my friend Applejack might have one that'll reach it!" Pinkie said. She galloped so fast that she left little trails of dust as she made her way towards her friends house. Pinkie knew that Applejack would be home today, and knew that she had several ladders that were capable of reaching the cloud. Pinkie stopped at the front of the barn, and took a deep breath.

"APPLEJACK WHERE ARE YOU!?" Pinkie screeched so loud that it caused the area around her to shake. Even Steve could hear it, and her scream nearly caused his ear drums to explode.

"I'm right here sugar cube. Now what's with all the ruckus that ya'll causin?" Applejack said, walking out of the big, red barn, confused.

"Whoops, sorry about that, Ijust get too caught up sometimes." Pinkie let out a small giggle. "Anyway, I need you to help my client in getting Dashes pet down!"

"Again! That girl needs to learn how to take care of her dang pet!" Applejack shook her head. "Though since she is a friend, I'll help ya'll out. How big of a ladder are we talkin?"

"I would assume that a one-hundred foot one could do the trick for my friend." Pinkie said, causing Applejack to raise an eyebrow.

"Wait a minute. You said your friend? What kind of pony are we talking about?"

"Do you remember a while back at the Galla when I met this strange cloaked pony? Well it turns out that he does this sort of work!" Pinkie said, bouncing.

"Well Pinkie, I don't think that your friend does this sorta work. I reckon that he does some other work."

"Oh? Well what type of work would that be?" Pinkie said, raising an eyebrow.

"I have my suspicions, but I won't know for sure unless I meet him myself. Come on, let's go and get that ladder to him." Applejack said. Pinkie nodded, and they went inside the barn to go look for a ladder.

Steve looked up at the sun, and felt huge, warm streams of air coming from his nostrils. It was almost sun down, and that Pinkie Pie still hadn't returned with the ladder! He had waited long enough. No one expects a Royal Spy to wait this long on anything. Except, he sadly wasn't apart of the force anymore. He let his eyes wander downward, and sighed. The academy just didn't understand him. He was the best spy that they've ever had, and they just fire him like that!

"No! No more will I subjugate myself to this defeated attitude! Today, I will become anew! I will become-" before he could finish, Steve felt a hoof come forcefully down on the back of his head. With a thud, he slammed down on the murky surface.

"How does it feel to be the worst spy in history?" Steve looked up, and saw a green face with a smirk. His other two comrades were starting to form a circle around him.

"Look here Hot Shot, I just had one bad mission and I didn't even fail it! The academy just doesn't understand me and my background!" Steve said, rising to meet his rival.

"Well, that 'one bad mission' nearly cost the lives of several ponies. You really should be in jail right now ya fat bastard." Turning to his left, Steve heard a New Colt accent.

"Hey! Who's callin me a fat bastard Pastry? What, with a name like yours, I'm surprised you haven't reached three hundred pounds!" Steve put a hoof up to his mouth after thinking over what he said. Pastry said nothing in reply, instead reaching into the pocket of his dark cloak. Steve's eyes shot wide open. The blue colt pulled out a .22 magnum pistol that was usually found only in the Griffon Empire.

"If you say one. More. Word, then you're brain will be splattered across this damn walkway!" Pastry pointed the gun directly at Steve's head, the tip just touching his skull. Steve scampered backwards, only to run into the third member of the circle. In a flash, he stood up, and met Pastry, looking him dead in the eye.

"Oh yeah tough guy? I bet you won't actually pull the trigger." Steve said with a smirk.

"Try me bitch!" Pastry said, putting a hoof inches away from the trigger.

"Hey now guys... we don't actually have to go there. He's still an agent until he's formally dismissed by Celestia herself! Now Pastry, I know you know the penalty for killing a fellow Agent." Rider -the third party member- said, putting himself in-between the two. He was standing in his hind legs, with his two hooves on each of them.

"Ugh, fine. But when Rider's not around I'll-" Rider hit Pastry upside the head before he could finish. Mumbling, Pastry put the gun back. The four sat in silence for a while, until the trio nodded to themselves, and walked away. Straightening himself, Steve grumbled at how those three could be at a higher rank. More importantly, what were they doing in Ponyville? He knew that those three were assigned to a mission; after all he did hear it after getting his ass chewed out by the Commander. His curiosity peeked, he decided to follow them and figure out what mission they were on.

He made his way slowly, hoping from tree to tree. He figured that they didn't notice him, and wouldn't notice him. He made his way through town, taking off his cloak trying to blend in with the locals. Seeing his chance, Steve ducked into an alleyway and waited. The trio had stopped to take a little break at Sugarcube Corner. Steve made his way toward the building as slowly as possible. Seeing several folders on the table, and the trio looking through them, Steve figured that they would be too busy to notice him. He didn't know if he had stepped on a stick, or he was just unlucky, but Hot Shot was the first one to notice.

"Damn." Steve mumbled to himself. He looked over at the table and saw that the three were leaving in a hurry, even knocking over a patron or two. Steve let his shoulders sag, walking slowly towards the table. He sat down, and put his head in his hooves. He felt a small tear trickle down the side of his face. Looking up now, he saw that they had left behind a vanilla colored folder. Tilting his head, he rummaged through the contents to find anything interesting. His eyes grew wide as he looked at the last page of the folder. It was just a simple picture of the Elements of Harmony, but with numbers written over each of their heads, and a target symbol drawn on their faces. He did a quick double take at the picture. Was it just him, or did the Elements skin look a bit darker than usual. Holding it up to the sun, Steve noticed what appeared to be writing on the back. He took a deep breath, horrified to look at the back page.

Dear Princess Celestia. We are very sorry to inform you that we have undeniable evidence that the Elements of Harmony are plotting to take over Equestria. We strongly recommend that now is the time to take action to prevent any loss of innocents. Signed, Rider

Steve blinked several times, trying to process the information that he just read. The Elements of Harmony branded as traitors? That couldn't be; they were his heros, the reasons why he decided to join the force in the first place. He shook his head, not wanting to believe a single thing. He then felt his eyesight getting a bit blurry, and saw the world spinning around him. Getting up, Steve grabbed the folder in his mouth, and made a mad dash towards Sweet Apple Acers. Putting on his cloak, he figured that since it was night, he'd blend in swimmingly. Looking up at the stars, he headed off towards the castle that the Elements lived in, hoping to warn Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash. When he was just outside, he spotted Rairty and Pinkie Pie walking towards him.

"Well yellow Steve, we've been waiting for you." Rarity said with a deadly grin, Pinkie sharing the same reaction.

"Well, um isn't it nice to see you ladies." Steve stumbled on his words, then cleared his throat. "Rarity, aren't you supposed to be with Twilight?"

"Oh darling, I've always been here." Rarity said. Steve swore he heard wings flapping and a wagon pull up behind him. Turning around, he saw that he was indeed correct. Standing behind him, he saw Rainbow Dash holding a large, plastic bag in one of her hooves. Before he could react, Steve was forcefully shoved into the bag, and tossed onto the wagon. He tried squirming around for a while, until he felt a quick blow to the head, his vision fading into black.

Comments

[Braininthejar]

The first time I misread the title, I thought the story was about Steve Jobs in Equestria.

[thechicken95]

5476434 that could be an interesting idea for a story

[Whinifree]

Intriguing. I will watch this.

[thechicken95]

5477569
5477543

Thanks! Next chapter should be up sometime next week

[charles]

Blunt review:
encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQN2DC6yePLBMrQiIbwK14WkWOAMnhic_Fxko7azGFlFmSodUcaKw
Lose the .22, besides the wrist mounted crossbow seems more bad@ss, I would(you dont NEED to) change him from yellow coat to gray or dark blue, just a darker color. Besides yellow is the most "eye attracted color" not so good for a spy and not to much waiting for spy or pinkie for each other, seems more sinister when a crime is commited in broad daylight, and in public, also a turtle stuck in a cloud.....really? 250 jusy for accepting the job.....really? A james bond reference would be nice "names Colt, Elusive Colt" besides that I looking forward to the next chapter

[thechicken95]

5513487 the Bond reference might be seen as forced though. Not to sound annoying, but I was hoping for a critique on the overall story, found any plot holes, and my grammar ect. Still glad you like it though!

[charles]

5545321 (no offense) took ya long enough, anyway, im just saying how is equestria already have powder weapons, not only that but sone decent one's as well? The wrist mounted crossbow is fired by muscle movements, and could be used as a hidden blade And yellow IS the most eye attracted color. encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTkpGlm_1XxKGfzeYcGjnPS3JG8TCvS2ZgSnDTFS8hGbZdGdfcG